₦airaland Forum

The question is for married women. What is/are the reasons that you would avoid or refuse sex with your husband?

My wife's own is when I get lazy at home and I don't help in the house chores e.g cleaning, cooking, bathing the kids etc. She won't fight with me or argue but when I touch her like this, she will find a meaningful excuse. She's tired, not in the mood, headache, tomorrow, I need to shower first and I'm too lazy now etc. I found out myself that it was when I helped at home that there were no excuses, it's always a happy ending.

I can't imagine myself begging my wife for sex.

If I touch you and you give silly excuse, I'm out of bed immediately. That's where 4:20 comes handy.

Or11:
My wife's own is when I get lazy at home and I don't help in the house chores e.g cleaning, cooking, bathing the kids etc. She won't fight with me or argue but when I touch her like this, she will find a meaningful excuse. She's tired, not in the mood, headache, tomorrow, I need to shower first and I'm too lazy now etc. I found out myself that it was when I helped at home that there were no excuses, it's always a happy ending.

Do you really need for your wife to go through all that in order to remind you of your part in your own marriage - this through denial of sex - before you know to play it?

She is meant to be companion and partner in your relationship - not your 'trainer'.

Kobojunkie:
Do you really need for your wife to go through all that in order to remind you or your part in your own marriage, this through denial, before you know to play it?

She is meant to be adult partner in your relationship - not your 'trainer'.

Shey na only me no understand this comment ni..?

Daveambition:
Shey na only me no understand this comment ni..?

Updated.

How on Earth will you refuse to be part of house chores? You dey look for trouble nah

Kriss216:
I can't imagine myself begging my wife for sex.

If I touch you and give silly excuse, I'm out of bed immediately. That's where 4:20 comes handy.

Alaye relax.
Na when yu wife a woman yu go knw say dem get manipulative formats..
Yu either abide to most of their terms&condition or angrily leave the house, las las yu'll stil return home & by then; she sef go don strategise another method to provoke yu the more..
Hardman no be for wey punna dey o, conji go bring yu to ur kness begging..
Forget wetin most men dey form outside, behind close doors dem weak dyeee

Kriss216:
I can't imagine myself begging my wife for sex.

If I touch you and give silly excuse, I'm out of bed immediately. That's where 4:20 comes handy.

Lemme bookmark this post. Kindly let us know when you finally get married.

Ahmed0336:
Lemme bookmark this post. Kindly let us know when you finally get married.

ROFLMAO

All the above comments are irrelevant. You lot aren't married women, would be nice to hear from married women and what makes them deny their husband's the thing. I'm sure there are lots of reasons and married men here can learn a thing or two.

Daveambition:
Alaye relax.
Na when yu wife a woman yu go knw say dem get manipulative formats..
Yu either abide to most of their terms&condition or angrily leave the house, las las yu'll stil return home & by then; she sef go don strategise another method to provoke yu the more..
Hardman no be for wey punna dey o, conji go bring yu to ur kness begging..
Forget wetin most men dey form outside, behind close doors dem weak dyeee

Isn't it of importance to consider important the reason why many women are driven into this manipulative attempts at correcting issues in their marriages to begin with?

Take the OP'S given example. Imagine both the man and woman agreed from the beginning to sharing the house duties as a couple. But somewhere down the road, OP'S began neglecting his part, leaving the entire burden on his equally stressed wife to bare alone. Frustrated and stressed out, the wife, maybe after numerous attempts to talk to him about the importance of doing his share of the chores, and for fear she might turn into her worst nightmare - a nagger- resorts instead to 'training' the OP by denying him sex as a way of getting him to comply with the agreement they both made from the start.

No two marriages are the same, and so this needs to be considered on case by case basis ofcourse.

Or11:
All the above comments are irrelevant. You lot aren't married women, would be nice to hear from married women and what makes them deny their husband's the thing. I'm sure there are lots of reasons and married men here can learn a thing or two.

First and foremost, marriage isn't rocket science, so this myth that only the married understand is foolish thinking.

Second, none of what you described in your op is unique to married folks. Even children in kindergarten with friends can relate.

Daveambition:
Alaye relax.
Na when yu wife a woman yu go knw say dem get manipulative formats..
Yu either abide to most of their terms&condition or angrily leave the house, las las yu'll stil return home & by then; she sef go don strategise another method to provoke yu the more..
Hardman no be for wey punna dey o, conji go bring yu to ur kness begging..
Forget wetin most men dey form outside, behind close doors dem weak dyeee

SIMPlified yarns!

Konji go make me beg my wife for punna

Her kpekus must be laced with raw golds then

[s]

Or11:
All the above comments are irrelevant. You lot aren't married women, would be nice to hear from married women and what makes them deny their husband's the thing. I'm sure there are lots of reasons and married men here can learn a thing or two.

[/s]
You guys are disgrace to the institution called marriage!

Begging your wife for sex.. Shame on y'all!

Daveambition:
Shey na only me no understand this comment ni..?

That kobojunkie guy is daft. Know this and know peace.

Kriss216:
SIMPlified yarns!

Konji go make me beg my wife for punna

Her kpekus must be laced with raw golds then

Na who neva marry yet dey thug about..
Thanks to Nairaland wey dey teach most of una English, who no get academical knowledge to the word "SIMP" go follow dey yarn dust..
Dummies just full this forum & lacks mutual respect

Daveambition:
Na who neva marry yet dey thug about..
Thanks to Nairaland wey dey teach most of una English, who no get academical knowledge to the word "SIMP" go follow dey yarn dust..
Dummies just full this forum & lacks mutual respect

Oga, go and wash madam's pant before she deny you sex tomorrow.

most of the things wey hem write i no understand am sef

DoggoneDogg:
That kobojunkie guy is daft. Know this and know peace.

How many married women have you spoken to before coming to the conclusion that married women deny their husband sex?

AderogbaOmokeye:
What is 4:20?

Weed.

I nor go take am from my girlfriend, let alone wife wey i marry.

Mstick:
How many married women have you spoken to before coming to the conclusion that married women deny their husband sex?

I too know, abeg show us where he take conclude for wetin he write..

Nairaland men are aproko and chuchu. The op said married women but men here have hijacked the thread . You men are really sex starved no wonder you are always bashing women .
No woman has commented . You lot have chased the matured married women away with your constant red pill � talk. What you have left is immature below 18 single girls here who give you back your own banter

.

Its only a bastatd bloody useless stupid and foolish simp of a man that'll beg his wife fur sex.
Over my dead body.
I rather die.
Of course I no go die.. But that'll be the end of the marriage.
God forbid. Spits

Klass99:
I am not married but I thought it would be nice to read from married women to know or understand why this occurs. It might help some married men self reflect and self correct where needed, if a particular situation applies to them. For example if it's poor hygiene, selfish or poor performance in bed, not providing, etc............ I am just speculating.

I followed Gaggii's thread on this same issue/topic, it was one of the most educating and entertaining threads I have come across on NL. It was delightful to see grown men being candid and vulnerable about their realities. I laughed hard at some comments, shook my head at comments from oversabi and ITK men, who aren't even married and one comment in particular broke my heart. See comment below;



Even though the user is a complete stranger I felt bad reading this, especially the words in bold. I think as women we underestimate how much men would really like to feel appreciated, complimented and loved (even if it's through sex). There were valuable lessons from Gaggii's thread and I appreciate the education in male psychology it provided me. A similar education (in female psychology) from married women, for men, would be appropriate. Let's learn from each other, but, I understand why some women may be reluctant to participate/share. The trolling, bullying and insults on the forum can be something else, especially towards women.

This one is deep but yea it happens. Some men have it worse than others or some have it easier than others. Me I'm just curious what reasons other wives give, some might be funny even if it's a serious marital issue. I know money is a reason many women lock up, luckily that's not why my locks up.

.

Klass99:
The assumption that money is the reason many women lock up, is a sweeping generalisation and erroneous.

You just said money is not the case in your situation, so what is the problem? If you followed the thread I mentioned, you would know money wasn't the issue with most men who shared their stories.

Bad hygiene, an unattractive look and selfishness in bed, may top the list before money. A recurring theme on NL with men is always money, money this, money that. It is NOT ALWAYS about your money or the lack of it.

Are you a neat/clean person, are you good to look at? Will a woman look at you and think damn...... I would like to touch those biceps or run my hands all over his body? Are you well mannered or classless and ill mannered?

There was a front page thread where a guy talked about investing in one's self physically, spiritually, mentally and financially. He emphasised on the physical aspect, mentioning how he looked so much better and attractive to women, since he started working out. Guess what your own gender people did? They bashed him left, right and center, claiming all a man needs to do, is have money to get a woman

In my mind, I was like, when will some of these self proclaimed logical people learn? What that guy said was so on point, but money no dey gree them see road. All the men I see working out in my estate look good, are sexy and appealing to me. I even told one of them (one day) in sincere admiration of his beauty, he seemed glad to hear it, said thank you and we went our separate ways.

You people think we don't like nice things and we are all about the money, abi? What is it sef? Are some women not hustling legitimately to make money too? We are moved by what we see too, we are either moved to;

1. Admiration/interesting private thoughts or....
2. Repulsion and disgust.

Sorry, this was longer than I intended, but consider it an education in female psychology.

I only assumed money was one of the issues because I have read stories. I didn't say most women, I just said many women. This is a valid reason for women because if a man if not helping in the house financially then there's problem.

Now you are saying what I want to hear. Bad hygiene, selfishness in bed, unattractive are some possible reasons too. Some women will probably say "we don't have intelligent conversations any more".

Thanks for the lesson in female psychology, I want lessons please

Klass99:
Sorry, this was longer than I intended, but consider it an education in female psychology.

Commendable, but you see the bolded? Taa! Them no go take am. They'll rather pay money to kings and exploitative redpillers who sell pseudo-psychology books on Amazon and claim: 'don't listen to what women say.' That one will just respond to you for responding sake, e sure me say nothing stuck.

But you've done the Lord's work in putting the message out there sha, so I gifu that credit.

Klass99:
I am not married but I thought it would be nice to read from married women to know or understand why this occurs. It might help some married men self reflect and self correct where needed, if a particular situation applies to them. For example if it's poor hygiene, selfish or poor performance in bed, not providing, etc............ I am just speculating.

I followed Gaggii's thread on this same issue/topic, it was one of the most educating and entertaining threads I have come across on NL. It was delightful to see grown men being candid and vulnerable about their realities. I laughed hard at some comments, shook my head at comments from oversabi and ITK men, who aren't even married and one comment in particular broke my heart. See comment below;



Even though the user is a complete stranger I felt bad reading this, especially the words in bold. I think as women we underestimate how much men would really like to feel appreciated, complimented and loved (even if it's through sex). There were valuable lessons from Gaggii's thread and I appreciate the education in male psychology it provided me. A similar education (in female psychology) from married women, for men, would be appropriate. Let's learn from each other, but, I understand why some women may be reluctant to participate/share. The trolling, bullying and insults on the forum can be something else, especially towards women.

Please share a link of Gaggii's tread