₦airaland Forum

AlexBells:
So, I had known this girl for the past 3 years, she lives in Nsukka and I ussually come around since I have a family here when I met her three years ago, she was writing her WAEC and we seem to fall for each other, however she got admission later that year and now in UNEC so we didn't see for over a year becuase I was going through some stuff that didn't give me space to travel and they packed out from their formal house.

Few weeks back, I came to Nsukka for some trainings and given the ASUU strike, she is staying back in Nsukka, this had given us enough time to reunite, the love and desire is still there but a highly Intolerant girl I never knew had just emerged out of the blue.

First, she's from Agbo Delta State, she is one of the people who don't accept being Igbo, okay I have no problem with that but what irritates me is why she always throw subtle insult on the Igbos. Meanwhile since she been on strike she's been the one taking care of their shop where I ussually go to buy stuff and also make withdrawals, apart from the fact that I love her, I prefer to go to her shop becuase they run a POS service so I can easily withdraw and do my shopping right there.

On several occasions, I had overhead her speaking with her mum in their Agbo dialect and I can almost understand them completely despite my being from Nsukka, Ezikoba to be precise. I had asked her on several occasions, if you are not Igbo why do I understand you while you spoke to your mum, she always told me to forget that one.

Then one day a man came to withdraw money and instead of handing the money to her, the man kept the money on the table just about two foot away, so after collecting the money from the table, when the man left she now said "You Igbos don't have respect especially Igbo men, why would he keep the money on the table instead of give it to me", I looked at her and said, I hope you know thats hate speech when you make such generalisation by saying you Igbos while this if at all is an issue is individualistic. I asked her, I'm Igbo what do she think about me, she said I'm different however she wish to change me so I don't have that Igbo attitude, I smiled through that.

Honestly she's decent and intelligent but religious as well and seemingly intolerant in that aspect too, meanwhile I'm not quite the church going type especially because I have a view that religion had severely impaired our society and while acknowledging religion and God, I believe that extremism in religion is as well dangerous, and in another note, I see religion as an aspect of socialisation of which the Nigerian churches is suffering the same decay with the general society and as such I appreciate my peace and most times I isolate myself from most social gatherings.

However we had an argument over time about this whole church and God stuff, she wants me to start going to church, partly her concern is becuase of the rigorous nature of my trainings, she don't appreciate the fact that I'm isolated but the manner she's pressing for that is crazy, this morning she sent me a message telling me that if I don't give my life to christ that I should stop whatever with her, I smiled however to be honest I was hurt.

I'm worried becuase at one point I even considered marrying her, but even if I begin to go to church, what happens to the identity of our children, becuase I know her parents must have been the one that thought her so much intolerance for the Igbos, to even think that she was born and raised in Nsukka. Bellow is the screenshot of her message and reply.

Please I need advice, I don't want anyone to judge her especially as regards her tribal sentiments on the Igbo, I understand it is what she had been fed while growing, shes a nice person generally.

The girl is rather confuse if not how can someone claiming to love God will still hate another tribe whereas Jesus said love one another . ask her if God is pleased with her hating another tribe and see her struggle to answer . she's mad and I'm not sorry to say so.

Bro look for a way to make peace with that Babe.
Then ensure you take her to cloud 9 afterwards.
You can do that once or multiple times, and then leave her for Agbor and the Religious Men she sole desires.

Life is not as SIMPle as you think, there's always a subtle war here and there, especially btw Boo and Bae in a relationship. Win that war and leave asap.

Dump her and find someone else who is sane

AlexBells:
So, I had known this girl for the past 3 years, she lives in Nsukka and I ussually come around since I have a family here when I met her three years ago, she was writing her WAEC and we seem to fall for each other, however she got admission later that year and now in UNEC so we didn't see for over a year becuase I was going through some stuff that didn't give me space to travel and they packed out from their formal house.

Few weeks back, I came to Nsukka for some trainings and given the ASUU strike, she is staying back in Nsukka, this had given us enough time to reunite, the love and desire is still there but a highly Intolerant girl I never knew had just emerged out of the blue.

First, she's from Agbo Delta State, she is one of the people who don't accept being Igbo, okay I have no problem with that but what irritates me is why she always throw subtle insult on the Igbos. Meanwhile since she been on strike she's been the one taking care of their shop where I ussually go to buy stuff and also make withdrawals, apart from the fact that I love her, I prefer to go to her shop becuase they run a POS service so I can easily withdraw and do my shopping right there.

On several occasions, I had overhead her speaking with her mum in their Agbo dialect and I can almost understand them completely despite my being from Nsukka, Ezikoba to be precise. I had asked her on several occasions, if you are not Igbo why do I understand you while you spoke to your mum, she always told me to forget that one.

Then one day a man came to withdraw money and instead of handing the money to her, the man kept the money on the table just about two foot away, so after collecting the money from the table, when the man left she now said "You Igbos don't have respect especially Igbo men, why would he keep the money on the table instead of give it to me", I looked at her and said, I hope you know thats hate speech when you make such generalisation by saying you Igbos while this if at all is an issue is individualistic. I asked her, I'm Igbo what do she think about me, she said I'm different however she wish to change me so I don't have that Igbo attitude, I smiled through that.

Honestly she's decent and intelligent but religious as well and seemingly intolerant in that aspect too, meanwhile I'm not quite the church going type especially because I have a view that religion had severely impaired our society and while acknowledging religion and God, I believe that extremism in religion is as well dangerous, and in another note, I see religion as an aspect of socialisation of which the Nigerian churches is suffering the same decay with the general society and as such I appreciate my peace and most times I isolate myself from most social gatherings.

However we had an argument over time about this whole church and God stuff, she wants me to start going to church, partly her concern is becuase of the rigorous nature of my trainings, she don't appreciate the fact that I'm isolated but the manner she's pressing for that is crazy, this morning she sent me a message telling me that if I don't give my life to christ that I should stop whatever with her, I smiled however to be honest I was hurt.

I'm worried becuase at one point I even considered marrying her, but even if I begin to go to church, what happens to the identity of our children, becuase I know her parents must have been the one that thought her so much intolerance for the Igbos, to even think that she was born and raised in Nsukka. Bellow is the screenshot of her message and reply.

Please I need advice, I don't want anyone to judge her especially as regards her tribal sentiments on the Igbo, I understand it is what she had been fed while growing, shes a nice person generally.

Trojan8:
I tire honestly. Someone is from Delta state, you called her Igbo and she rejected. I am from Agbor, and I don't like being called Igbo. Does that mean that I hate the Igbos? The way people are wired though.


If as an Igbo man, you tell me your tribe and then I call you a Deltan. Will you accept it?

No one likes being called what they are not. This same issue caused a fight in Lagos when someone called one Engineer a Hausa guy. The Engineer insisted that he is from the north but not Hausa. That doesn't mean the engineer hates all house people.

The OP is an intolerant extremist.

perdollar:
And she stays in nsukka

Coming from an Igbo man that stays in every state one Nigeria. So because she stays in Nsukka means that she must associate as Igbo.

Meanwhile when you get a response, you talk about hate for the Igbo tribe. Una never ready.

Trojan8:
Those Igbo people dey vex me. Everybody from South South na Igbo by force, if you no gree the you hate them.

They don't understand say no be everytime you push sometimes you pull.

Your heart has been broken many times and you resort to this.

Give reorientation of your mindset a chance

GooodHardDick:
All these long write up for a hoe who's collecting dicks around, disguising herself using religion.

Alaye, haven't you heard you don't date Nigeria girls? U bang their pussies only, dump them and move on

Exactly the same behavioural pattern with a lady I met here. Lol.

Walk away for your own good. They are intolerant in Tribal and Religious issues, so disgusting.

MoneyGoDrop:
Amayabor1

You will not really understand until you live with igbos (if you are not an Igbo).

I have lived in the South east, North, South West, and south South. The average Igbo person is very greedy and cunning. If possible, they can sell you for money. Money is their centre of attraction. Some of he things I witnessed in Igbo land, I have never witnessed it in any other part of Nigeria. Whenever I go to the market and you are a Igbo person, I either leave or make sure I am very alert!

Well I'm Full bloodied Igbo man but i will like to know where in the southeast that you stayed in? I'm really surprised by this your statement because this is the first time in my life that Igbos have been described as CUNNING,try to cheat you yes but cunning is not our nature.

I lived in Anambra and Imo.

AlexBells:
Honestly she's decent and intelligent but religious as well and seemingly intolerant in that aspect too

Stop deceiving yourself, she is is not decent and also very dull. Decent and intelligent people are never tribal nor religious extremist. Have you ever heard of Chinua Achebe or Wole Soyinka talk like your girl friend? Those are examples of world acclaimed intelligent people. You are dating a dummy. Fucck your own and pass her to the next Igbo or Yoruba demon, let the pusssy go round.

OP has murdered grammar.

Me wey be traditionalist my Bae knows, I told her go to church and I do my own thing..... we are happy in the relationship, understanding matters sha

AlexBells:
So, I had known this girl for the past 3 years, she lives in Nsukka and I ussually come around since I have a family here when I met her three years ago, she was writing her WAEC and we seem to fall for each other, however she got admission later that year and now in UNEC so we didn't see for over a year becuase I was going through some stuff that didn't give me space to

Few weeks back, I came to Nsukka for some trainings and given the ASUU strike, she is staying back in Nsukka, this had given us enough time to reunite, the love and desire is still there but a highly Intolerant girl I never knew had just emerged out of the blue.

First, she's from Agbo Delta State, she is one of the people who don't accept being Igbo, okay I have no problem with that but what irritates me is why she always throw subtle insult on the Igbos. Meanwhile since she been on strike she's been the one taking care of their shop where I ussually go to buy stuff and also make withdrawals, apart from the fact that I love her, I prefer to go to her shop becuase they run a POS service so I can easily withdraw and do my shopping right there.

On several occasions, I had overhead her speaking with her mum in their Agbo dialect and I can almost understand them completely despite my being from Nsukka, Ezikoba to be precise. I had asked her on several occasions, if you are not Igbo why do I understand you while you spoke to your mum, she always told me to forget that one.

Then one day a man came to withdraw money and instead of handing the money to her, the man kept the money on the table just about two foot away, so after collecting the money from the table, when the man left she now said "You Igbos don't have respect especially Igbo men, why would he keep the money on the table instead of give it to me", I looked at her and said, I hope you know thats hate speech when you make such generalisation by saying you Igbos while this if at all is an issue is individualistic. I asked her, I'm Igbo what do she think about me, she said I'm different however she wish to change me so I don't have that Igbo attitude, I smiled through that.

Honestly she's decent and intelligent but religious as well and seemingly intolerant in that aspect too, meanwhile I'm not quite the church going type especially because I have a view that religion had severely impaired our society and while acknowledging religion and God, I believe that extremism in religion is as well dangerous, and in another note, I see religion as an aspect of socialisation of which the Nigerian churches is suffering the same decay with the general society and as such I appreciate my peace and most times I isolate myself from most social gatherings.

However we had an argument over time about this whole church and God stuff, she wants me to start going to church, partly her concern is becuase of the rigorous nature of my trainings, she don't appreciate the fact that I'm isolated but the manner she's pressing for that is crazy, this morning she sent me a message telling me that if I don't give my life to christ that I should stop whatever with her, I smiled however to be honest I was hurt.

I'm worried becuase at one point I even considered marrying her, but even if I begin to go to church, what happens to the identity of our children, becuase I know her parents must have been the one that thought her so much intolerance for the Igbos, to even think that she was born and raised in Nsukka. Bellow is the screenshot of her message and reply.

Please I need advice, I don't want anyone to judge her especially as regards her tribal sentiments on the Igbo, I understand it is what she had been fed while growing, shes a nice person generally.

I thought I have been the only seeing those things here, I'm doing my NYSC at Central Hospital Agbor.. You will see someone bearing everything that is Igbo but will strongly disagreed that they're Igbo.

On the religion part, you have to respect the girl on that, we always need God in our lives..

She was blunt in a hurtful way.

Nothing wrong in her being blunt because you two are not compatible. That's the truth except you need to be lied to. She's is a Christian and you are not.
There will always be quarrel and misunderstanding if you end up being together.
But she should have been subtle and make you understand why she is not comfortable in the relationship.

The truth once again is you are not compatible.

Move on.

Stay blessed

Dorwadora:
Dearest sir.... Hate is a powerful word to be used anyhow. I do not hate any tribe, I said I have somethings against igbo men. The 'Something' in this context might be my unanswered opinion or belief. I am not tribalistic, I've never been and last time I checked my rights to Conscience, Expression and Religion as a Nigerian is still intact.

Don't mind him, Igbo are quick to accuse other nations of being tribalist. No tribe is ever good enough for them. Yoruba, Fulani , Hausa, Ijaw, Efik,Ibibio etc all hated the Igbos in an average igbo's mind. So it is that mindset that they take around heating Up the polity.

You see how quick he used the hate speech option to attack you. He was trying to shut u up and stop you from airing your opinion.

[color=#770077][/color]
Bro've you ever been to Agbor?
She isn't being Tribal but real, we all've contrasting cultures/tradition, and the tendency to live by them, and see everyone's opposing act as wrong.
But Hey, If your Colleague/Client drops some files on your table, with your outstretched Hand ignored, how would you feel?
My Verdict Isssssss, You marry from Where you are from, and whose Tradition you can Tolerate.

SilentQueen:
If that is her only problem you don't need to leave her...Many Nigerians are like her so no big deal, just try to tell her how you feel about it and hopefully she will change

We humans will start progressing a lot if we understand the simple truth that it's not your duty to change others, you can only provide adequate support to a man that recognizes the need for a change. The same way "a leopard can not change it's coat'. Let OP do whatever suits him since he's the one in the relationship with her, if he can tolerate her behaviour like Will Smith has been with Jada even though she's a cheat, then good for him. Otherwise, let him vamos for his peace of mind.

E pain u? Hahahaha! Na Igbo be my woman. Na Igbo wife I get. If you claim not to be Igbo, then I can't do that thing u want me to do. That's my rule. If you don't like it, go Kee yasef

Trojan8:
Someone said she's from Aniocha, you called her Igbo. She told you that she's not, so that's how you figured she hates Igbos?

Meanwhile same you told her that you want to marry an Igbo girl, and the world did not end. Why are Igbos like this?

Ishilove:
Lmao! I had to do a double take because It's almost like I am the one the OP is describing

See how rude the OP is. She was very polite and coordinated in her message, while his message is full of 'mumu', 'fool' and other allied vitriol.

Isioma deserves better. She is right in showing you the door, you stiff necked heathen.

Ok, you "stiff necked heathen".

Alexbells, all this one na because Una Neva fuçk, give am better prick her brain go reset. No rape abeg, use ya head

Ishilove:
Lmao! I had to do a double take because It's almost like I am the one the OP is describing

See how rude the OP is. She was very polite and coordinated in her message, while his message is full of 'mumu', 'fool' and other allied vitriol.

Isioma deserves better. She is right in showing you the door, you stiff necked heathen.

It's obvious they're not compatible. No fuss, no drama... they should just part ways.

Left to me, I won't even reply her. Snubbing and not giving a fekk is my second nature!

AlexBells:
So, I had known this girl for the past 3 years, she lives in Nsukka and I ussually come around since I have a family here when I met her three years ago, she was writing her WAEC and we seem to fall for each other, however she got admission later that year and now in UNEC so we didn't see for over a year becuase I was going through some stuff that didn't give me space to travel and they packed out from their formal house.

Few weeks back, I came to Nsukka for some trainings and given the ASUU strike, she is staying back in Nsukka, this had given us enough time to reunite, the love and desire is still there but a highly Intolerant girl I never knew had just emerged out of the blue.

First, she's from Agbo Delta State, she is one of the people who don't accept being Igbo, okay I have no problem with that but what irritates me is why she always throw subtle insult on the Igbos. Meanwhile since she been on strike she's been the one taking care of their shop where I ussually go to buy stuff and also make withdrawals, apart from the fact that I love her, I prefer to go to her shop becuase they run a POS service so I can easily withdraw and do my shopping right there.

On several occasions, I had overhead her speaking with her mum in their Agbo dialect and I can almost understand them completely despite my being from Nsukka, Ezikoba to be precise. I had asked her on several occasions, if you are not Igbo why do I understand you while you spoke to your mum, she always told me to forget that one.

Then one day a man came to withdraw money and instead of handing the money to her, the man kept the money on the table just about two foot away, so after collecting the money from the table, when the man left she now said "You Igbos don't have respect especially Igbo men, why would he keep the money on the table instead of give it to me", I looked at her and said, I hope you know thats hate speech when you make such generalisation by saying you Igbos while this if at all is an issue is individualistic. I asked her, I'm Igbo what do she think about me, she said I'm different however she wish to change me so I don't have that Igbo attitude, I smiled through that.

Honestly she's decent and intelligent but religious as well and seemingly intolerant in that aspect too, meanwhile I'm not quite the church going type especially because I have a view that religion had severely impaired our society and while acknowledging religion and God, I believe that extremism in religion is as well dangerous, and in another note, I see religion as an aspect of socialisation of which the Nigerian churches is suffering the same decay with the general society and as such I appreciate my peace and most times I isolate myself from most social gatherings.

However we had an argument over time about this whole church and God stuff, she wants me to start going to church, partly her concern is becuase of the rigorous nature of my trainings, she don't appreciate the fact that I'm isolated but the manner she's pressing for that is crazy, this morning she sent me a message telling me that if I don't give my life to christ that I should stop whatever with her, I smiled however to be honest I was hurt.

I'm worried becuase at one point I even considered marrying her, but even if I begin to go to church, what happens to the identity of our children, becuase I know her parents must have been the one that thought her so much intolerance for the Igbos, to even think that she was born and raised in Nsukka. Bellow is the screenshot of her message and reply.

Please I need advice, I don't want anyone to judge her especially as regards her tribal sentiments on the Igbo, I understand it is what she had been fed while growing, shes a nice person generally.

Your mind is no more with this lady.
You're just marking time

op the girl is not perfect, but I swears she get head pass you. An enlighten person can easily teach her things she needs to learn. But you, I'm just seeing you as probably a male chauvinist and unteachable

I don't blame her for her dislike on Igbo men, the problem is that some Igbo guys especially the uneducated ones doing business, they see women as items that they can acquire with money, and I'm sure she sees a lot of this class of Igbo guys in their shop. They have this mentality that every girl is cheap and beneath them. An enlighten igbo guy is a gem, I give that to them.

The average Agbor person will tell you they are not igbos, they call themselves Ika nation with slight variations in their dialect. Same with Ikwere, they will tell you they are not igbos even when their dialect seems to be derived from Igbo language. You can't force them to be igbos, you are the one displaying tribalistic sentiments here trying to force them to accept that they are igbos. I have heard many of such similar dialects to the igbos deny that they are igbos. They will jokingly tell you " I don't eat human being, I cannot be an Igbo". So it's beyond the language, it's the character of those known to be igbos that they don't like, e.g their greed and mischievous ways of doing business, they can use their family members for rituals, although this is becoming rampant all over the country but the Igbos are the pioneers.

So op I'm afraid you don't have what it takes to enlighten her, don't force her but leave her and look for your fellow igbo girl. She knows what she likes as well as what she wants in a man, and you don't just have it man. Her decision is not based on money, that's what I like

The young girl is not wrong. Who would want to associate with igbos Even igbos are disowning igbos. Mind you, Delta is not igbo. And she has the right to choose her affiliation irrespective.

After taking your time to put up this rubbish, you think you are enlightened Abi? You are not different from that girl. For your mind, you are educated and you get sense. I blame the OP for a simple decision for this kind of issue, he's bringing this on hear for educated illiterates to advise him.

Ficient:
op the girl is not perfect, but I swears she get head pass you. An enlighten person can easily teach her things she needs to learn. But you, I'm just seeing you as probably a male chauvinist unreachable block head.

I don't blame her for her dislike on Igbo men, the problem is that some Igbo guys especially the uneducated ones doing business, they see women as items that they can acquire with money, and I'm sure she sees a lot of this class of Igbo guys in their shop. They have this mentality that every girl is cheap and beneath them.

The average Agbor person will tell you they are not igbos, they call themselves Ika nation with slight variations in their dialect. Same with Ikwere, they will tell you they are not igbos even when their dialect seems to be derived from Igbo language. You can't force them to be igbos, you are the one displaying tribalistic sentiments here trying to force them to accept that they are igbos. I have heard many of such similar dialects to the igbos deny that they are igbos. They will jokingly tell you " I don't eat human being, I cannot be an Igbo". So it's beyond the language, it's the character of those known to be igbos that they don't like, e.g their greed and mischievous ways of doing business, they can use their family members for rituals, although this is becoming rampant all over the country but the Igbos are the pioneers.

So op I'm afraid you don't have what it takes to enlighten her, don't force her but leave her and look for your fellow igbo girl. She knows what she likes as well as what she wants in a man, and you don't just have it man. Her decision is not based on money, that's what I like

ygowon:
After taking your time to put up this rubbish, you think you are enlightened Abi? You are not different from that girl. For your mind, you are educated and you get sense. I blame the OP for a simple decision for this kind of issue, he's bringing this on hear for educated illiterates to advise him.

And you are no different from the op

Ficient:
And you are no different from the op

No, we are not the same, because I can't bring up a little issue here for fools to advise me.
Once I see one whom I perceive would give me wahala, I don't think twice in pushing that person out.

A Christian should not marry a person void of Christ.

Trojan8:
I tire honestly. Someone is from Delta state, you called her Igbo and she rejected. I am from Agbor, and I don't like being called Igbo. Does that mean that I hate the Igbos? The way people are wired though.


If as an Igbo man, you tell me your tribe and then I call you a Deltan. Will you accept it?

Agbor is not a tribe. Agbor is in Anioma. Anyone from Agbor is Igbo.

Pedklose:
Agbor is not a tribe. Agbor is in Anioma. Anyone from Agbor is Igbo.

Agbor is Ika Nation. You can't force me to be Igbo sha.

Slynation:
From the screenshot, she made her points very clear and you also made your stand very clear and precise...!! So both of you should pretend nothing happened and go your separate ways...!!

Honestly speaking, some guys are impressing me this days, no time to be begging around/ trying to convince a confuse or domineering lady anymore, just leave her alone so she can always find you in her memories...!!

The girl is his unofficial account officer.

Lolz