₦airaland Forum

Whao, what a virtuous woman.

chioma134:
This post was triggered by an earlier post I saw where the poster was having long talks with his friend's wife. I've been in a similar situation. I changed location and had to be separate from my family due to work. I was lonely and needed a friend. I talk with my husband regularly, but his interests are not my interests, so I find that besides household and family matters, we have little else to talk about. I found myself talking to this guy I met when I went for an official assignment. We started as friends, but we became attracted to each other. So when I travelled back to base, we started these long conversations. We're both born-again Christians and both married, so we kept to certain boundaries. I enjoyed conversing with him more than with my spouse. I became consumed with thoughts of him. He also expressed his desire and attraction towards me, but we laughed over it as jokes.

My husband noticed the conversations when I travelled home and became suspicious. He forbade me from speaking with him. He had never seen me have long talks with any friend, talkless of a male one. I informed my friend and he said no problem, he would wait till I travelled back to work base before he would continue. He later travelled to meet his family and conversation became scanty. I realized how much I was addicted to him when I couldn't talk to him as much as I wanted. He returned to base and we continued like before.

I started praying for God to help me overcome these desires. Maybe he also felt the same, because for some reasons I don't know, he reduced the frequency of calls and chats drastically. I didn't try to find out why, just thought the time-off would help me clear out immoral thoughts. But I got hurt when he acted indifferent on one occasion when I felt he should have shown more care. I asked him about it and he pretended not to understand what I was talking about. I read the writing on the wall, and decided to play along. So I said "bye. It was nice meeting you." Part of me was grateful it ended, another part was wishing I could still be with him. I love my husband and children, I cannot come and scatter my home.

He thought I was joking. I was no longer responding to his chats, and when I did, only with monosyllables. He became hurt and accused me of going silent on him. I told him he started it. He wanted me to become defensive, but the Holy Spirit whispered "keep quiet ". So I allowed him rant without saying anything. I thank God I didn't, because I would have exposed how deep my true feelings for him were.

Right now, he chats once in a while, just general "how are you". I say "fine". My feelings have healed and I thank God we didn't continue because I wouldn't have been able to stop myself from an affair if we had eventually had any physical contact. I can categorically say I'm no longer in love with him.

I penned these down for those struggling with similar situations. Just cut off the relationship. Stop conversation, chatting, or physical contact. Then pray for God to help you overcome those lusty feelings.

If this story is not for entertainment, that is if it is a true story, then you are an adulterous woman.

You have already cheated on your husband emotionally, probably also physically but you decided to skip that part

postmann:
In pure undiluted scriptural standard, you've committed adultery with him already. Just so you know that.

But rather more important is your very last paragraph of advice to other women who might be going through similar temptation as you. Here, let me quote you:

"Just cut off the relationship. Stop conversation, chatting, or physical contact. Then pray for God to help you overcome those lusty feelings"

Now, here's the irony buried in the paragraph before last:

"Right now, he chats once in a while, just general "how are you". I say "fine"

While you still keep the door ajar for prospective adultery with this same idiot, (most likely when you and hubby have a fight) you are advising other women going through similar challenge to cut off chats totally. You know the intention of this iniquitous pig and your own abominable longings and vulnerability towards him yet you still entertain his obviously probing "how are you's." You're still an unrepentant adulterer and you need counseling and deliverance before entertaining the idea of climbing that virtual pulpit you just did by preaching this sermon. And may GOD help your husband who's ignorant enough to permit that stupid work of yours that has no respect for matrimony to post you outside his location.

this one Is already a shameless slut. 100% certain that the guy already fvckedd the loose bitch. I hate nowadays Nigeria women, cheap scums completely useless to me apart from our lovely sweet mothers the descent african women of those days. Much respect for our decent moms

@op. Thank God you were able to overcome the temptation. However you need to deal with the crack in the wall so that the devil does not strike again. The crack is that you seem to share little interests with your husband, If you don't address it now, another issue like this may come up again. Better to always deal with issues like this from the root. Try to get closer to your husband, love the things he loves and vice versa he should do the same too, within a short while you will notice that you will start spending more time in conversation and he will be your best buddy.
God bless you.

postmann:
In pure undiluted scriptural standard, you've committed adultery with him already. Just so you know that.

But rather more important is your very last paragraph of advice to other women who might be going through similar temptation as you. Here, let me quote you:

"Just cut off the relationship. Stop conversation, chatting, or physical contact. Then pray for God to help you overcome those lusty feelings"

Now, here's the irony buried in the paragraph before last:

"Right now, he chats once in a while, just general "how are you". I say "fine"

While you still keep the door ajar for prospective adultery with this same idiot, (most likely when you and hubby have a fight) you are advising other women going through similar challenge to cut off chats totally. You know the intention of this iniquitous pig and your own abominable longings and vulnerability towards him yet you still entertain his obviously probing "how are you's." You're still an unrepentant adulterer and you need counseling and deliverance before entertaining the idea of climbing that virtual pulpit you just did by preaching this sermon. And may GOD help your husband who's ignorant enough to permit that stupid work of yours that has no respect for matrimony to post you outside his location.

Where did she use the word-totally, misitah pious sanctimonious not-idiot

Antimarraige:
I feel some missing parts in the story

Me too! If Uriah went home to Beth shebah, perhaps noone would have known that Davud was the father of the child. You know what, Beth sheba would never have "told the whole story:, Thank God for prophets like Nathan. What we are "blessed" with now are chalattans.

Its always not wise to have an opposite sex as a bestie when married.

postmann:
Yes, I'm a Christian, just not an examplary kind. But that's not the point and neither is your stone-based reply.

The point is simple: as simple as the four-lettered scriptural standard when dealing with lust -- flee!

Your continuous once-in-a-while PERSONAL "how are you" chats (not office/work related) with this waiting-in-the-wings adulterer doesn't look like fleeing, rather it looked like preserving the lust in the refrigerator (for who knows when hubby NEPA would break power transmission? You may just need something chilled on the side)

And here's another problem, the lustful feelings you talked about being common is more of a man's problem than a woman. Men are far more prone to be moved by sight than women.

Being a married woman and a working class, you should have enough distraction from your domestic/maternal obligation coupled with your workload in the office.

Keep your eyes to your office desk when at work and your thoughts with your husband and quit with the wander-lustful thoughts. All office related discussions ought to end during office hours. Your continuous chat with this man means the source of adultery still lurks within you.

� Can't help but laugh at your write up.

Very apt bro.

I couldn't have said it better.

I keep saying it having a woman as best friend is like keeping a chicken as a pet, you will later chop am

Mryacks:
The question I always poised to people is, how would you geneuinely feel if your partner does or is doing same thing that you are doing in secret? The answer will help one to think deep over the consequey of their actions...

This is it. Thank you for this deep question.

Lool awon judge Judy's full this thread.

Even those that are practicing full time adultery without remorse are castigating the OP.



OP I am happy for you jare, you nipped it in the bud.

chioma134:
This post was triggered by an earlier post I saw where the poster was having long talks with his friend's wife. I've been in a similar situation. I changed location and had to be separate from my family due to work. I was lonely and needed a friend. I talk with my husband regularly, but his interests are not my interests, so I find that besides household and family matters, we have little else to talk about. I found myself talking to this guy I met when I went for an official assignment. We started as friends, but we became attracted to each other. So when I travelled back to base, we started these long conversations. We're both born-again Christians and both married, so we kept to certain boundaries. I enjoyed conversing with him more than with my spouse. I became consumed with thoughts of him. He also expressed his desire and attraction towards me, but we laughed over it as jokes.

My husband noticed the conversations when I travelled home and became suspicious. He forbade me from speaking with him. He had never seen me have long talks with any friend, talkless of a male one. I informed my friend and he said no problem, he would wait till I travelled back to work base before he would continue. He later travelled to meet his family and conversation became scanty. I realized how much I was addicted to him when I couldn't talk to him as much as I wanted. He returned to base and we continued like before.

I started praying for God to help me overcome these desires. Maybe he also felt the same, because for some reasons I don't know, he reduced the frequency of calls and chats drastically. I didn't try to find out why, just thought the time-off would help me clear out immoral thoughts. But I got hurt when he acted indifferent on one occasion when I felt he should have shown more care. I asked him about it and he pretended not to understand what I was talking about. I read the writing on the wall, and decided to play along. So I said "bye. It was nice meeting you." Part of me was grateful it ended, another part was wishing I could still be with him. I love my husband and children, I cannot come and scatter my home.

He thought I was joking. I was no longer responding to his chats, and when I did, only with monosyllables. He became hurt and accused me of going silent on him. I told him he started it. He wanted me to become defensive, but the Holy Spirit whispered "keep quiet ". So I allowed him rant without saying anything. I thank God I didn't, because I would have exposed how deep my true feelings for him were.

Right now, he chats once in a while, just general "how are you". I say "fine". My feelings have healed and I thank God we didn't continue because I wouldn't have been able to stop myself from an affair if we had eventually had any physical contact. I can categorically say I'm no longer in love with him.

I penned these down for those struggling with similar situations. Just cut off the relationship. Stop conversation, chatting, or physical contact. Then pray for God to help you overcome those lusty feelings.

but you are still chatting him once in a while you are suppossed to cut off patapata as a marrid woman and born again christiah.

postmann:
In pure undiluted scriptural standard, you've committed adultery with him already. Just so you know that.

But rather more important is your very last paragraph of advice to other women who might be going through similar temptation as you. Here, let me quote you:

"Just cut off the relationship. Stop conversation, chatting, or physical contact. Then pray for God to help you overcome those lusty feelings"

Now, here's the irony buried in the paragraph before last:

"Right now, he chats once in a while, just general "how are you". I say "fine"

While you still keep the door ajar for prospective adultery with this same idiot, (most likely when you and hubby have a fight) you are advising other women going through similar challenge to cut off chats totally. You know the intention of this iniquitous pig and your own abominable longings and vulnerability towards him yet you still entertain his obviously probing "how are you's." You're still an unrepentant adulterer and you need counseling and deliverance before entertaining the idea of climbing that virtual pulpit you just did by preaching this sermon. And may GOD help your husband who's ignorant enough to permit that stupid work of yours that has no respect for matrimony to post you outside his location.

you just wasted your energy in your long post, simply say the dude will still get off her pant. once you had feelings for someone the best is to cut them off totally either blocking and deleting anything that has to do with them



these husband too no dey try, imagine not giving your wife attention she needed can give room for temptation, if that that dude is a good player, she will still hang this op legs and fúck the hell out of her with the little greetings the Op didn't see as danger

ireneidiva:
I hope you are really alright.

You're only here by the sheer abundance of "defend a fellow female like me." Nothing more or less.

You see, the Bible indicates that things like these are things we should flee from as Christians. It's not by power, not even by because you are a child of God. Humans are humans and errors are bound to happen, the thing is some of these errors are way bigger than others.
I thank God it turned out the way it did eventually. But for anyone else, don't even get started, don't create any space for such cause it might just be too much to handle.
Cheers

chioma134:
This post was triggered by an earlier post I saw where the poster was having long talks with his friend's wife. I've been in a similar situation. I changed location and had to be separate from my family due to work. I was lonely and needed a friend. I talk with my husband regularly, but his interests are not my interests, so I find that besides household and family matters, we have little else to talk about. I found myself talking to this guy I met when I went for an official assignment. We started as friends, but we became attracted to each other. So when I travelled back to base, we started these long conversations. We're both born-again Christians and both married, so we kept to certain boundaries. I enjoyed conversing with him more than with my spouse. I became consumed with thoughts of him. He also expressed his desire and attraction towards me, but we laughed over it as jokes.

My husband noticed the conversations when I travelled home and became suspicious. He forbade me from speaking with him. He had never seen me have long talks with any friend, talkless of a male one. I informed my friend and he said no problem, he would wait till I travelled back to work base before he would continue. He later travelled to meet his family and conversation became scanty. I realized how much I was addicted to him when I couldn't talk to him as much as I wanted. He returned to base and we continued like before.

I started praying for God to help me overcome these desires. Maybe he also felt the same, because for some reasons I don't know, he reduced the frequency of calls and chats drastically. I didn't try to find out why, just thought the time-off would help me clear out immoral thoughts. But I got hurt when he acted indifferent on one occasion when I felt he should have shown more care. I asked him about it and he pretended not to understand what I was talking about. I read the writing on the wall, and decided to play along. So I said "bye. It was nice meeting you." Part of me was grateful it ended, another part was wishing I could still be with him. I love my husband and children, I cannot come and scatter my home.

He thought I was joking. I was no longer responding to his chats, and when I did, only with monosyllables. He became hurt and accused me of going silent on him. I told him he started it. He wanted me to become defensive, but the Holy Spirit whispered "keep quiet ". So I allowed him rant without saying anything. I thank God I didn't, because I would have exposed how deep my true feelings for him were.

Right now, he chats once in a while, just general "how are you". I say "fine". My feelings have healed and I thank God we didn't continue because I wouldn't have been able to stop myself from an affair if we had eventually had any physical contact. I can categorically say I'm no longer in love with him.

I penned these down for those struggling with similar situations. Just cut off the relationship. Stop conversation, chatting, or physical contact. Then pray for God to help you overcome those lusty feelings.

Sekoni003:
I have a rule; regardless of the bond or memories we used to share as friends of the opposite sex, once you get married, I tone down communication between us to the barest minimum. It's a hard choice but I'd rather not see myself as the man who ruined another man's home.

About about being close friends with already married women, that's another big NO for me. We are humans with feelings and emotions, not pre-programmed robots. Women especially tend to fall for someone who's always there to listen and be a shoulder to lean on and all that stuff. I've had several instances where I've had to subtly and politely decline a close friendship with married women. Your husband's shoulders should be more than enough for you to lean on. If you have problems, get a therapist. Muchísimas gracias

Wisdom!

Separate the yarn from the goat.. simple....

Some people will be deceiving themselves, thinking goat left in charge of yam won't think of eating it

Fiscus105:
NB, in my previous. Comment, I talked about , either weak man or innocent man, I meant weak man who didn't know how to break any maturity you think u can display, or innocent who not ready for sexual immoral act with u.
Wolf in sheep clothing (player), will not only break ur defense but also commit nonsense with married women.
You might have been have a field day before, a day is coming that "monkey go go market,wey ehn no go come back again"
hundreds of it are happening on daily basis
Ire o.......

Again..... Reread my response to you....what has an individuals mental maturity to.do with whether he or she runs into weak/innocent or strong individuals or not??

Try to understand what is being asked and maybe then you will see that these ramblings of your make no sense considering what I asserted.

Born again my foot

He changed first, before you realized how loose you were.

You're not Born anything... You just turned your alpha on

Holy spirit Kee you there

chioma134:
This post was triggered by an earlier post I saw where the poster was having long talks with his friend's wife. I've been in a similar situation. I changed location and had to be separate from my family due to work. I was lonely and needed a friend. I talk with my husband regularly, but his interests are not my interests, so I find that besides household and family matters, we have little else to talk about. I found myself talking to this guy I met when I went for an official assignment. We started as friends, but we became attracted to each other. So when I travelled back to base, we started these long conversations. We're both born-again Christians and both married, so we kept to certain boundaries. I enjoyed conversing with him more than with my spouse. I became consumed with thoughts of him. He also expressed his desire and attraction towards me, but we laughed over it as jokes.

My husband noticed the conversations when I travelled home and became suspicious. He forbade me from speaking with him. He had never seen me have long talks with any friend, talkless of a male one. I informed my friend and he said no problem, he would wait till I travelled back to work base before he would continue. He later travelled to meet his family and conversation became scanty. I realized how much I was addicted to him when I couldn't talk to him as much as I wanted. He returned to base and we continued like before.

I started praying for God to help me overcome these desires. Maybe he also felt the same, because for some reasons I don't know, he reduced the frequency of calls and chats drastically. I didn't try to find out why, just thought the time-off would help me clear out immoral thoughts. But I got hurt when he acted indifferent on one occasion when I felt he should have shown more care. I asked him about it and he pretended not to understand what I was talking about. I read the writing on the wall, and decided to play along. So I said "bye. It was nice meeting you." Part of me was grateful it ended, another part was wishing I could still be with him. I love my husband and children, I cannot come and scatter my home.

He thought I was joking. I was no longer responding to his chats, and when I did, only with monosyllables. He became hurt and accused me of going silent on him. I told him he started it. He wanted me to become defensive, but the Holy Spirit whispered "keep quiet ". So I allowed him rant without saying anything. I thank God I didn't, because I would have exposed how deep my true feelings for him were.

Right now, he chats once in a while, just general "how are you". I say "fine". My feelings have healed and I thank God we didn't continue because I wouldn't have been able to stop myself from an affair if we had eventually had any physical contact. I can categorically say I'm no longer in love with him.

I penned these down for those struggling with similar situations. Just cut off the relationship. Stop conversation, chatting, or physical contact. Then pray for God to help you overcome those lusty feelings.

Great to know. If I may come in a bit, don't just think your lack of discussion with your husband has anything to do with varying interest. It is simply the fact that both of you may have had some squabbles and decided to reduce communication. Just cast your mind back to when you started. Couples after staying for a while start separating interests.

Even if you marry the new guy, same will happen.

You have done well

You are not born again pls don't confuse dedication to church and born again.

chioma134:
This post was triggered by an earlier post I saw where the poster was having long talks with his friend's wife. I've been in a similar situation. I changed location and had to be separate from my family due to work. I was lonely and needed a friend. I talk with my husband regularly, but his interests are not my interests, so I find that besides household and family matters, we have little else to talk about. I found myself talking to this guy I met when I went for an official assignment. We started as friends, but we became attracted to each other. So when I travelled back to base, we started these long conversations. We're both born-again Christians and both married, so we kept to certain boundaries. I enjoyed conversing with him more than with my spouse. I became consumed with thoughts of him. He also expressed his desire and attraction towards me, but we laughed over it as jokes.

My husband noticed the conversations when I travelled home and became suspicious. He forbade me from speaking with him. He had never seen me have long talks with any friend, talkless of a male one. I informed my friend and he said no problem, he would wait till I travelled back to work base before he would continue. He later travelled to meet his family and conversation became scanty. I realized how much I was addicted to him when I couldn't talk to him as much as I wanted. He returned to base and we continued like before.

I started praying for God to help me overcome these desires. Maybe he also felt the same, because for some reasons I don't know, he reduced the frequency of calls and chats drastically. I didn't try to find out why, just thought the time-off would help me clear out immoral thoughts. But I got hurt when he acted indifferent on one occasion when I felt he should have shown more care. I asked him about it and he pretended not to understand what I was talking about. I read the writing on the wall, and decided to play along. So I said "bye. It was nice meeting you." Part of me was grateful it ended, another part was wishing I could still be with him. I love my husband and children, I cannot come and scatter my home.

He thought I was joking. I was no longer responding to his chats, and when I did, only with monosyllables. He became hurt and accused me of going silent on him. I told him he started it. He wanted me to become defensive, but the Holy Spirit whispered "keep quiet ". So I allowed him rant without saying anything. I thank God I didn't, because I would have exposed how deep my true feelings for him were.

Right now, he chats once in a while, just general "how are you". I say "fine". My feelings have healed and I thank God we didn't continue because I wouldn't have been able to stop myself from an affair if we had eventually had any physical contact. I can categorically say I'm no longer in love with him.

I penned these down for those struggling with similar situations. Just cut off the relationship. Stop conversation, chatting, or physical contact. Then pray for God to help you overcome those lusty feelings.

chioma134:
This post was triggered by an earlier post I saw where the poster was having long talks with his friend's wife. I've been in a similar situation. I changed location and had to be separate from my family due to work. I was lonely and needed a friend. I talk with my husband regularly, but his interests are not my interests, so I find that besides household and family matters, we have little else to talk about. I found myself talking to this guy I met when I went for an official assignment. We started as friends, but we became attracted to each other. So when I travelled back to base, we started these long conversations. We're both born-again Christians and both married, so we kept to certain boundaries. I enjoyed conversing with him more than with my spouse. I became consumed with thoughts of him. He also expressed his desire and attraction towards me, but we laughed over it as jokes.

My husband noticed the conversations when I travelled home and became suspicious. He forbade me from speaking with him. He had never seen me have long talks with any friend, talkless of a male one. I informed my friend and he said no problem, he would wait till I travelled back to work base before he would continue. He later travelled to meet his family and conversation became scanty. I realized how much I was addicted to him when I couldn't talk to him as much as I wanted. He returned to base and we continued like before.

I started praying for God to help me overcome these desires. Maybe he also felt the same, because for some reasons I don't know, he reduced the frequency of calls and chats drastically. I didn't try to find out why, just thought the time-off would help me clear out immoral thoughts. But I got hurt when he acted indifferent on one occasion when I felt he should have shown more care. I asked him about it and he pretended not to understand what I was talking about. I read the writing on the wall, and decided to play along. So I said "bye. It was nice meeting you." Part of me was grateful it ended, another part was wishing I could still be with him. I love my husband and children, I cannot come and scatter my home.

He thought I was joking. I was no longer responding to his chats, and when I did, only with monosyllables. He became hurt and accused me of going silent on him. I told him he started it. He wanted me to become defensive, but the Holy Spirit whispered "keep quiet ". So I allowed him rant without saying anything. I thank God I didn't, because I would have exposed how deep my true feelings for him were.

Right now, he chats once in a while, just general "how are you". I say "fine". My feelings have healed and I thank God we didn't continue because I wouldn't have been able to stop myself from an affair if we had eventually had any physical contact. I can categorically say I'm no longer in love with him.

I penned these down for those struggling with similar situations. Just cut off the relationship. Stop conversation, chatting, or physical contact. Then pray for God to help you overcome those lusty feelings.

I think u d only one fallin in love, he's not on d same page. Dont play yourself

chioma134:
This post was triggered by an earlier post I saw where the poster was having long talks with his friend's wife. I've been in a similar situation. I changed location and had to be separate from my family due to work. I was lonely and needed a friend. I talk with my husband regularly, but his interests are not my interests, so I find that besides household and family matters, we have little else to talk about. I found myself talking to this guy I met when I went for an official assignment. We started as friends, but we became attracted to each other. So when I travelled back to base, we started these long conversations. We're both born-again Christians and both married, so we kept to certain boundaries. I enjoyed conversing with him more than with my spouse. I became consumed with thoughts of him. He also expressed his desire and attraction towards me, but we laughed over it as jokes.

My husband noticed the conversations when I travelled home and became suspicious. He forbade me from speaking with him. He had never seen me have long talks with any friend, talkless of a male one. I informed my friend and he said no problem, he would wait till I travelled back to work base before he would continue. He later travelled to meet his family and conversation became scanty. I realized how much I was addicted to him when I couldn't talk to him as much as I wanted. He returned to base and we continued like before.

I started praying for God to help me overcome these desires. Maybe he also felt the same, because for some reasons I don't know, he reduced the frequency of calls and chats drastically. I didn't try to find out why, just thought the time-off would help me clear out immoral thoughts. But I got hurt when he acted indifferent on one occasion when I felt he should have shown more care. I asked him about it and he pretended not to understand what I was talking about. I read the writing on the wall, and decided to play along. So I said "bye. It was nice meeting you." Part of me was grateful it ended, another part was wishing I could still be with him. I love my husband and children, I cannot come and scatter my home.

He thought I was joking. I was no longer responding to his chats, and when I did, only with monosyllables. He became hurt and accused me of going silent on him. I told him he started it. He wanted me to become defensive, but the Holy Spirit whispered "keep quiet ". So I allowed him rant without saying anything. I thank God I didn't, because I would have exposed how deep my true feelings for him were.

Right now, he chats once in a while, just general "how are you". I say "fine". My feelings have healed and I thank God we didn't continue because I wouldn't have been able to stop myself from an affair if we had eventually had any physical contact. I can categorically say I'm no longer in love with him.

I penned these down for those struggling with similar situations. Just cut off the relationship. Stop conversation, chatting, or physical contact. Then pray for God to help you overcome those lusty feelings.

I just dey look you dey laugh. It won't be long till you fu*k him. This is someone you once nutured the idea of sleeping with, now you only chat once in a while with him

Aunty, cut off the relationship totally and block each other's number, else one thing will lead to the other and you will have his corck in your mouth.

Antimarraige:
I feel some missing parts in the story

Gbam

chioma134:
This post was triggered by an earlier post I saw where the poster was having long talks with his friend's wife. I've been in a similar situation. I changed location and had to be separate from my family due to work. I was lonely and needed a friend. I talk with my husband regularly, but his interests are not my interests, so I find that besides household and family matters, we have little else to talk about. I found myself talking to this guy I met when I went for an official assignment. We started as friends, but we became attracted to each other. So when I travelled back to base, we started these long conversations. We're both born-again Christians and both married, so we kept to certain boundaries. I enjoyed conversing with him more than with my spouse. I became consumed with thoughts of him. He also expressed his desire and attraction towards me, but we laughed over it as jokes.

My husband noticed the conversations when I travelled home and became suspicious. He forbade me from speaking with him. He had never seen me have long talks with any friend, talkless of a male one. I informed my friend and he said no problem, he would wait till I travelled back to work base before he would continue. He later travelled to meet his family and conversation became scanty. I realized how much I was addicted to him when I couldn't talk to him as much as I wanted. He returned to base and we continued like before.

I started praying for God to help me overcome these desires. Maybe he also felt the same, because for some reasons I don't know, he reduced the frequency of calls and chats drastically. I didn't try to find out why, just thought the time-off would help me clear out immoral thoughts. But I got hurt when he acted indifferent on one occasion when I felt he should have shown more care. I asked him about it and he pretended not to understand what I was talking about. I read the writing on the wall, and decided to play along. So I said "bye. It was nice meeting you." Part of me was grateful it ended, another part was wishing I could still be with him. I love my husband and children, I cannot come and scatter my home.

He thought I was joking. I was no longer responding to his chats, and when I did, only with monosyllables. He became hurt and accused me of going silent on him. I told him he started it. He wanted me to become defensive, but the Holy Spirit whispered "keep quiet ". So I allowed him rant without saying anything. I thank God I didn't, because I would have exposed how deep my true feelings for him were.

Right now, he chats once in a while, just general "how are you". I say "fine". My feelings have healed and I thank God we didn't continue because I wouldn't have been able to stop myself from an affair if we had eventually had any physical contact. I can categorically say I'm no longer in love with him.

I penned these down for those struggling with similar situations. Just cut off the relationship. Stop conversation, chatting, or physical contact. Then pray for God to help you overcome those lusty feelings.

Born-again Christians!

If that man was not born again, he would have slept with you because he would have never let go that easily.

Na him go even dey pour fuel to your fire of affections for him.
You are lucky.

chioma134:
This post was triggered by an earlier post I saw where the poster was having long talks with his friend's wife. I've been in a similar situation. I changed location and had to be separate from my family due to work. I was lonely and needed a friend. I talk with my husband regularly, but his interests are not my interests, so I find that besides household and family matters, we have little else to talk about. I found myself talking to this guy I met when I went for an official assignment. We started as friends, but we became attracted to each other. So when I travelled back to base, we started these long conversations. We're both born-again Christians and both married, so we kept to certain boundaries. I enjoyed conversing with him more than with my spouse. I became consumed with thoughts of him. He also expressed his desire and attraction towards me, but we laughed over it as jokes.

My husband noticed the conversations when I travelled home and became suspicious. He forbade me from speaking with him. He had never seen me have long talks with any friend, talkless of a male one. I informed my friend and he said no problem, he would wait till I travelled back to work base before he would continue. He later travelled to meet his family and conversation became scanty. I realized how much I was addicted to him when I couldn't talk to him as much as I wanted. He returned to base and we continued like before.

I started praying for God to help me overcome these desires. Maybe he also felt the same, because for some reasons I don't know, he reduced the frequency of calls and chats drastically. I didn't try to find out why, just thought the time-off would help me clear out immoral thoughts. But I got hurt when he acted indifferent on one occasion when I felt he should have shown more care. I asked him about it and he pretended not to understand what I was talking about. I read the writing on the wall, and decided to play along. So I said "bye. It was nice meeting you." Part of me was grateful it ended, another part was wishing I could still be with him. I love my husband and children, I cannot come and scatter my home.

He thought I was joking. I was no longer responding to his chats, and when I did, only with monosyllables. He became hurt and accused me of going silent on him. I told him he started it. He wanted me to become defensive, but the Holy Spirit whispered "keep quiet ". So I allowed him rant without saying anything. I thank God I didn't, because I would have exposed how deep my true feelings for him were.

Right now, he chats once in a while, just general "how are you". I say "fine". My feelings have healed and I thank God we didn't continue because I wouldn't have been able to stop myself from an affair if we had eventually had any physical contact. I can categorically say I'm no longer in love with him.

I penned these down for those struggling with similar situations. Just cut off the relationship. Stop conversation, chatting, or physical contact. Then pray for God to help you overcome those lusty feelings.

Well,i thank God for you that you were able to call it back,you would have found out that he's the same as your husband or even worse than him when it comes to conversation.
Naturally a married man will not go into certain topic at a point in his marital life,not because he's not interested in them,but because the task ahead is much more important when compare to those topics and sweet words your casual friends says to you just to get into your pants.
The moment he sleeps with you,he will switch to your husband's mode of conversation.

chioma134:
This post was triggered by an earlier post I saw where the poster was having long talks with his friend's wife. I've been in a similar situation. I changed location and had to be separate from my family due to work. I was lonely and needed a friend. I talk with my husband regularly, but his interests are not my interests, so I find that besides household and family matters, we have little else to talk about. I found myself talking to this guy I met when I went for an official assignment. We started as friends, but we became attracted to each other. So when I travelled back to base, we started these long conversations. We're both born-again Christians and both married, so we kept to certain boundaries. I enjoyed conversing with him more than with my spouse. I became consumed with thoughts of him. He also expressed his desire and attraction towards me, but we laughed over it as jokes.

My husband noticed the conversations when I travelled home and became suspicious. He forbade me from speaking with him. He had never seen me have long talks with any friend, talkless of a male one. I informed my friend and he said no problem, he would wait till I travelled back to work base before he would continue. He later travelled to meet his family and conversation became scanty. I realized how much I was addicted to him when I couldn't talk to him as much as I wanted. He returned to base and we continued like before.

I started praying for God to help me overcome these desires. Maybe he also felt the same, because for some reasons I don't know, he reduced the frequency of calls and chats drastically. I didn't try to find out why, just thought the time-off would help me clear out immoral thoughts. But I got hurt when he acted indifferent on one occasion when I felt he should have shown more care. I asked him about it and he pretended not to understand what I was talking about. I read the writing on the wall, and decided to play along. So I said "bye. It was nice meeting you." Part of me was grateful it ended, another part was wishing I could still be with him. I love my husband and children, I cannot come and scatter my home.

He thought I was joking. I was no longer responding to his chats, and when I did, only with monosyllables. He became hurt and accused me of going silent on him. I told him he started it. He wanted me to become defensive, but the Holy Spirit whispered "keep quiet ". So I allowed him rant without saying anything. I thank God I didn't, because I would have exposed how deep my true feelings for him were.

Right now, he chats once in a while, just general "how are you". I say "fine". My feelings have healed and I thank God we didn't continue because I wouldn't have been able to stop myself from an affair if we had eventually had any physical contact. I can categorically say I'm no longer in love with him.

I penned these down for those struggling with similar situations. Just cut off the relationship. Stop conversation, chatting, or physical contact. Then pray for God to help you overcome those lusty feelings.

But some over sabi people say it's possible for a grown man and woman not related to be friends without anything happening.
If you are still in the same vicinity with the born again brother in the future, if care isn't taken, it would still repeat itself. You are both still in contact and on airplane mode now.
A matter of born again or niqaab doesn't make a different in fact higher propensity if the lifestyle they wish is at variance with what the image they present forces them to live.
Anyone denying the impossibility of unrelated grown up make and female maintaining neutral friendship is just being plain mischievous in my opinion. Would they be discussing politics and weather all the time.
Funny thing is that most relationship starts with the same excitement and the guy would revert back more worse than the husband after achieving his aim since he sees her as a cheap conquest that he can never trust.

chioma134:
This post was triggered by an earlier post I saw where the poster was having long talks with his friend's wife. I've been in a similar situation. I changed location and had to be separate from my family due to work. I was lonely and needed a friend. I talk with my husband regularly, but his interests are not my interests, so I find that besides household and family matters, we have little else to talk about. I found myself talking to this guy I met when I went for an official assignment. We started as friends, but we became attracted to each other. So when I travelled back to base, we started these long conversations. We're both born-again Christians and both married, so we kept to certain boundaries. I enjoyed conversing with him more than with my spouse. I became consumed with thoughts of him. He also expressed his desire and attraction towards me, but we laughed over it as jokes.

My husband noticed the conversations when I travelled home and became suspicious. He forbade me from speaking with him. He had never seen me have long talks with any friend, talkless of a male one. I informed my friend and he said no problem, he would wait till I travelled back to work base before he would continue. He later travelled to meet his family and conversation became scanty. I realized how much I was addicted to him when I couldn't talk to him as much as I wanted. He returned to base and we continued like before.

I started praying for God to help me overcome these desires. Maybe he also felt the same, because for some reasons I don't know, he reduced the frequency of calls and chats drastically. I didn't try to find out why, just thought the time-off would help me clear out immoral thoughts. But I got hurt when he acted indifferent on one occasion when I felt he should have shown more care. I asked him about it and he pretended not to understand what I was talking about. I read the writing on the wall, and decided to play along. So I said "bye. It was nice meeting you." Part of me was grateful it ended, another part was wishing I could still be with him. I love my husband and children, I cannot come and scatter my home.

He thought I was joking. I was no longer responding to his chats, and when I did, only with monosyllables. He became hurt and accused me of going silent on him. I told him he started it. He wanted me to become defensive, but the Holy Spirit whispered "keep quiet ". So I allowed him rant without saying anything. I thank God I didn't, because I would have exposed how deep my true feelings for him were.

Right now, he chats once in a while, just general "how are you". I say "fine". My feelings have healed and I thank God we didn't continue because I wouldn't have been able to stop myself from an affair if we had eventually had any physical contact. I can categorically say I'm no longer in love with him.

I penned these down for those struggling with similar situations. Just cut off the relationship. Stop conversation, chatting, or physical contact. Then pray for God to help you overcome those lusty feelings.

The spirit of a man is subject to a man
Many times we blame devil

yemmit90:
Any man or woman that find it easier to be friend with married opposite sex is a cheat.

No matter how close we are, once you get married, I will completely cut you off except if you have business to do with me or want to ask something about my profession.

I know many people here who are still friends with those of the opposite sex from even kindergarten days that have not cheated even after more than 3 decades of friendship.

Cheating has little to do with marriage but more to do with mental maturity.

Acidosis:
You've only reiterated my view. The emboldened text is the issue. How did they move from friendliness and office chats to inseparable love birds? She found in him what she thought her husband didn't have. That's a very wrong mindset. Your spouse won't have it all but you can intentionally place your spouse above everyone else.

The "friendship" isn't the issue per se. Everyone must condition their mind and be content with whatever qualities that made them chose their spouse in the first place. Getting your mind wander away from your spouse because of how someone talks, walks, or poo is a sign of self-control deficit and matrimonial immaturity. If you're truly married, these fickle things won't matter at all.

She simply made a mistake. And she has herself and no one else to blame, not "friendship".

Her "friendship" with the guy led to that, there are some qualities which you would not see or notice when you are not closer, such qualities would be as if it's not exist if you are not aware of them in a particular man or woman (Yoruba adage, if u dnt hear particular story you may not be bitter).

If she wasn't closer to her colleagues more than necessary, (after all, not only that man in that office), she wouldn't have discovered the quality in him, After discovery of such quality, nature would must definitely make that quality fascinating and render her vulnerable to go beyond her boundary