sollolucci77:
When a man is married he obviously has responsibilities...theres too much on his plate to be having fun unlike when he was a bachelor..

Godoverevery:


No wonder most of them envy me......lol

sollolucci77:


No matter how blissful a marriage is...your married friends will always envy you because there are some certain things they can no longer do and place they cant go....just enjoy yourself my brother

felong:
Marriage in this our generation does not favour men like a poster rightfully pointed out. That is why so many men are suffering and smiling. Just make your own money and enjoy, if pikin de hungry you give one local girl belley then settle her and carry your child. That's the best.

sollolucci77:


Babymama drama is another wahala oo..naija women wey dey craze wont just leave because you paid her off...she can even go to court and they may now give her custody of the child that you'll pay child support for

Nazgul:
I'm afraid that your observations are on point cos I have the same observations as well.

The most recent was my cousin brother who got married in 2020 before the lockdown, as I'm writing this we barely talk these days, even to reply WhatsApp messages na war. And when he does it's one complain or the other, ranging from how things are hard and since I'm single and an only child, I should assist him financially, to how his wife has changed, to how their one year old child consumes food like an adult... etc.

To understand him much better, I decided to put myself in his shoes. I'm a single guy, I renewed my rent last month (April) and I sat down to calculate all my monthly expenses. Data, fuel, gotv/Netflix, electricity, security, LAWMA, feeding, gas, miscellaneous...etc.

My point is if a woman comes on board that budget would tripple cos kids would be expected, she might want you to open a business for her, courtesy of your pocket, she might come with her younger sister to help out whose training and welfare would be on you, she would sometimes want you to assist her family eg, parents, siblings writing exams, school fees, rent...etc.

Now while your expenses has tripled, your income most times remains the same or even lower, you would resort to borrowing just to sustain your home, of which she won't even appreciate cos according to her, it's not enough, other men out there like you are performing much better for their families. You would live all your life working to finance the home, even your own kids would be strangers to you and love her more when she buys them Christmas clothes from the money you gave to her. They would grow up loving her as a sweet mom and vow never to see her suffer. forgetting all the sacrifices and dreams you gave up just to give them a better life. After pondering through all these, I understood my cousin's situation much better.

If I'm to be honest there's nothing special about marriage, it's more or less like bondage for men. And benefits only the women. Marriages if you have noticed have have reduced greatly, there are so many guys in their 30s and even 40s who aren't even talking about settling down. Would you blame them....of course not.

Women these days aren't helping matters. They dump the larger chunk of the financial responsibility on the man in the name of men are the head so it's his responsibility to cater for the home. But what they don't understand is God created women as a helpmeet, meaning they're there to lessen the budern of the man and not to add to it.

Open any topic here on Nairaland and talk about responsibilities in the home. More than 99% of the female replies would be that it's the job of the man and the man alone.

Women need to change such mindset, cos it has killed and drained the honey of millions of marriages.

Nazgul:
I'm afraid that your observations are on point cos I have the same observations as well.

The most recent was my cousin brother who got married in 2020 before the lockdown, as I'm writing this we barely talk these days, even to reply WhatsApp messages na war. And when he does it's one complain or the other, ranging from how things are hard and since I'm single and an only child, I should assist him financially, to how his wife has changed, to how their one year old child consumes food like an adult... etc.

To understand him much better, I decided to put myself in his shoes. I'm a single guy, I renewed my rent last month (April) and I sat down to calculate all my monthly expenses. Data, fuel, gotv/Netflix, electricity, security, LAWMA, feeding, gas, miscellaneous...etc.

My point is if a woman comes on board that budget would tripple cos kids would be expected, she might want you to open a business for her, courtesy of your pocket, she might come with her younger sister to help out whose training and welfare would be on you, she would sometimes want you to assist her family eg, parents, siblings writing exams, school fees, rent...etc.

Now while your expenses has tripled, your income most times remains the same or even lower, you would resort to borrowing just to sustain your home, of which she won't even appreciate cos according to her, it's not enough, other men out there like you are performing much better for their families. You would live all your life working to finance the home, even your own kids would be strangers to you and love her more when she buys them Christmas clothes from the money you gave to her. They would grow up loving her as a sweet mom and vow never to see her suffer. forgetting all the sacrifices and dreams you gave up just to give them a better life. After pondering through all these, I understood my cousin's situation much better.

If I'm to be honest there's nothing special about marriage, it's more or less like bondage for men. And benefits only the women. Marriages if you have noticed have have reduced greatly, there are so many guys in their 30s and even 40s who aren't even talking about settling down. Would you blame them....of course not.

Women these days aren't helping matters. They dump the larger chunk of the financial responsibility on the man in the name of men are the head so it's his responsibility to cater for the home. But what they don't understand is God created women as a helpmeet, meaning they're there to lessen the budern of the man and not to add to it.

Open any topic here on Nairaland and talk about responsibilities in the home. More than 99% of the female replies would be that it's the job of the man and the man alone.

Women need to change such mindset, cos it has killed and drained the honey of millions of marriages.

crazyclown:

One bottle of big stout for you. You are one of the few guys here who understands life and I enjoy reading you posts.

Godoverevery:
I want married men to help me understand this.
I noticed most of my friends who got married from 2017 till date become shadows of there real self after marriage.

I mean they become boring,less friendly, not social and not fun to be with few month after marriage.
Is there something that change a man life after marriage or is just a normal thing.
Like is marriage meant to kill the fun part of a man??

Am asking this because a very close friend of mine who got married last year August is also becoming a shadow of himself......he always moody this days, social life zero and I think something his heating him up from inside.....this was a fun guy and he was very happy about getting married to is wife but the man I see this days is not making me happy.

He was once told me had he known earlier he won't have got married but I felt it was just words of the lip because we were just having guys talks that day.

So married guys please help me clarify if my observation is right or just a normal thing.

MrBrownJay1:


its called TAKING CARE OF BUSINESS aka being responsible and seeking for the wellbeing of their family before anything else. the fun they had with their boys, now they have it with their family!

Jaybrown!

You still alive

190theclown:


Jaybrown!

You still alive

MrBrownJay1:


bro, long time.....where have you been? funny i saw a post of yours on FB a few weeks ago.

Really

I am always on there mostly. Been good. Life's good.

Forgotten we still ff each other facebook. Hope you've been well.

Nazgul:
I'm afraid that your observations are on point cos I have the same observations as well.

The most recent was my cousin brother who got married in 2020 before the lockdown, as I'm writing this we barely talk these days, even to reply WhatsApp messages na war. And when he does it's one complain or the other, ranging from how things are hard and since I'm single and an only child, I should assist him financially, to how his wife has changed, to how their one year old child consumes food like an adult... etc.

To understand him much better, I decided to put myself in his shoes. I'm a single guy, I renewed my rent last month (April) and I sat down to calculate all my monthly expenses. Data, fuel, gotv/Netflix, electricity, security, LAWMA, feeding, gas, miscellaneous...etc.

My point is if a woman comes on board that budget would tripple cos kids would be expected, she might want you to open a business for her, courtesy of your pocket, she might come with her younger sister to help out whose training and welfare would be on you, she would sometimes want you to assist her family eg, parents, siblings writing exams, school fees, rent...etc.

Now while your expenses has tripled, your income most times remains the same or even lower, you would resort to borrowing just to sustain your home, of which she won't even appreciate cos according to her, it's not enough, other men out there like you are performing much better for their families. You would live all your life working to finance the home, even your own kids would be strangers to you and love her more when she buys them Christmas clothes from the money you gave to her. They would grow up loving her as a sweet mom and vow never to see her suffer. forgetting all the sacrifices and dreams you gave up just to give them a better life. After pondering through all these, I understood my cousin's situation much better.

If I'm to be honest there's nothing special about marriage, it's more or less like bondage for men. And benefits only the women. Marriages if you have noticed have have reduced greatly, there are so many guys in their 30s and even 40s who aren't even talking about settling down. Would you blame them....of course not.

Women these days aren't helping matters. They dump the larger chunk of the financial responsibility on the man in the name of men are the head so it's his responsibility to cater for the home. But what they don't understand is God created women as a helpmeet, meaning they're there to lessen the budern of the man and not to add to it.

Open any topic here on Nairaland and talk about responsibilities in the home. More than 99% of the female replies would be that it's the job of the man and the man alone.

Women need to change such mindset, cos it has killed and drained the honey of millions of marriages.

Godoverevery:

True that........mostly I think marriage drains them financially.

One once told me to my face he can't go out with me because the way I dress he can't keep up.......this guy told me he hasn't got new clothes in 1 and half year.

Married men are really trying........I pray God gives me the strength because I don't think I will be able to cope with the stress and demands.

sollolucci77:


Babymama drama is another wahala oo..naija women wey dey craze wont just leave because you paid her off...she can even go to court and they may now give her custody of the child that you'll pay child support for

Nazgul:
I'm afraid that your observations are on point cos I have the same observations as well.

The most recent was my cousin brother who got married in 2020 before the lockdown, as I'm writing this we barely talk these days, even to reply WhatsApp messages na war. And when he does it's one complain or the other, ranging from how things are hard and since I'm single and an only child, I should assist him financially, to how his wife has changed, to how their one year old child consumes food like an adult... etc.

To understand him much better, I decided to put myself in his shoes. I'm a single guy, I renewed my rent last month (April) and I sat down to calculate all my monthly expenses. Data, fuel, gotv/Netflix, electricity, security, LAWMA, feeding, gas, miscellaneous...etc.

My point is if a woman comes on board that budget would tripple cos kids would be expected, she might want you to open a business for her, courtesy of your pocket, she might come with her younger sister to help out whose training and welfare would be on you, she would sometimes want you to assist her family eg, parents, siblings writing exams, school fees, rent...etc.

Now while your expenses has tripled, your income most times remains the same or even lower, you would resort to borrowing just to sustain your home, of which she won't even appreciate cos according to her, it's not enough, other men out there like you are performing much better for their families. You would live all your life working to finance the home, even your own kids would be strangers to you and love her more when she buys them Christmas clothes from the money you gave to her. They would grow up loving her as a sweet mom and vow never to see her suffer. forgetting all the sacrifices and dreams you gave up just to give them a better life. After pondering through all these, I understood my cousin's situation much better.

If I'm to be honest there's nothing special about marriage, it's more or less like bondage for men. And benefits only the women. Marriages if you have noticed have have reduced greatly, there are so many guys in their 30s and even 40s who aren't even talking about settling down. Would you blame them....of course not.

Women these days aren't helping matters. They dump the larger chunk of the financial responsibility on the man in the name of men are the head so it's his responsibility to cater for the home. But what they don't understand is God created women as a helpmeet, meaning they're there to lessen the budern of the man and not to add to it.

Open any topic here on Nairaland and talk about responsibilities in the home. More than 99% of the female replies would be that it's the job of the man and the man alone.

Women need to change such mindset, cos it has killed and drained the honey of millions of marriages.