₦airaland Forum

Thanks bro![quote author=Ketapu post=114072134][/quote]

My eyes have already gone sore with these your writeups, but to be more sincere you deserve all you experienced.
This is what happens when you fail to examine a lady over only the sex she has to offer, moreover our traditions here in Nigeria makes things more easier for us, what happened to making your due findings about her and her family.
Op you fvcked up, you don't have to run behind redpill to cover your shame, learn from this and build your moral lifestyle if you'll like to create a healthy family in the future.

Emmy417:
I was meant to understand that the both separated, beforeI started living with her. So I don't know sure if he still bangs her while I'm away. Most likely they both were still practicing Okafor's Law! Yeah.

She chose to still live close to him, even though she knows it could expose her doings with him, so obviously she valued being close to him that much.

Emmy417:
Thanks bro!
I think this simp of a thing could be as a result of been trained by my mom alone. No man in my life to scold me etc. Well, she really tried in training me. She did a very very good job. It wasn't easy then at all!! But I ve come to realise in this life, that been too sissy in life, people wouldal always takeadvantage.

Growing up with a mother alone makes you bluepilled, simpish, less assertive, nice and very decent to a fault (especially to women, most dangerously), less disciplined, less able to put your logic above your emotions, and a conformist who likely hops on the less risky/hard path and societal bandwagon, etc. This also applies if you have both parents, but your mum rules the house or your father is not always around and you spend much of the time with your mum.

A (single) mother might take care of you and try to provide your needs, but she can't make a man out of you no matter how much she tries for the following reasons:

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(1) she has never been a man,

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(2) a mother's way of caring is different from a father's way of caring. In general, a mother cares for the most part by trying to make you comfortable and keep you away from discomforts that trouble you, pampering in others word; her care is genuine, but it is short-sighted and gratifies instantly. She won't stress you too much.

A father's care is centered on long-term benefits and seeing what's ultimately good for you. He won't shield you from the discomfort, toughness, need for self-control/ delay of instant gratification, and discipline that will help you in life; these are what you need to thrive in life. This is one of the reasons why children are closer to their mothers because it's a human tendency to seek comfort and the path of least resistance; children don't know any better so they flow along because they know that the father's hands are harsher even though both parents want the best for the kids. Mothers show you as a child what the world should be, but a good father shows you how it should be and tries to prepare and set you up for it even if it hurts your feelings or makes you hate him at the moment.

Your mother will try to help you do your homework if it is too difficult for you or give it to someone that can, but your father will insist you do it by yourself even if you fail. You as a child and your mum won't like this because they are looking at the short-term rewards (a bad grade), but your father is trying to help you by engaging you and giving you the muscles to learn, fail, and improve. Also, in most cases, not all, when fathers want the child to go to boarding school, the mother doesn't prefer it because she wants you in sight where she can be there to nuture you and step in to protect you from the kind of hardship as seen in boarding school.

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(3) Good fathers will teach you that actions have consequences and you must hold yourself responsible for your actions; this makes you mature, manly, and makes you successful. Fathers are better teachers of this because children learn when you lead by example. Women are usually not the best at leading by example when it comes to accountability and taking blame for their actions.

Your mother can't make you a man. Highest, she provides for you and comfort you then when you come or age, she might pile pressure on you by nagging and harsh treatment for you to start making it even though she didn't prepare you or give you the discipline, mindset and attitude a father. They think things will just drop down from heaven magically... women's thinking. It is the same way they keep nagging and pile pressure (by harsh treatments) on their husbands who just lost their jobs thinking it will push them and make a job magically appear. Most don't even pile pressure on their sons. They let them become sons and mama's boys even in their late 20s.

Emmy417:
Good evening my people, I'm gonna summarise everything, so I don't bore you guys.
So I parted ways with my so called baby mama earlier this year. We started living together when she took in. I was working somewhere in South West. While she on the other hand works in Portharcourt. I took responsibility of paying house rents for the past 3yrs +.
When I lost my job in 2020, God's Grace I got another contract in Portharcourt. Had to fully move in with her.
Note; 80% of the properties are hers. My whole properties are still in South West. I ve gat a one bedroom apartment there still.
So While living together, first I found out she lied about her age, cos I saw her WAEC result. She wrote WAEC when am still in JS2. How's that possible?? I confronted her, she kept saying all manner of things to cover up. And that was last time I saw that result. She hid it or rather took it to somewhere far from our home.
When I first introduced her to my sis 2019, she was the one that noticed the age gap. She told me bros, this girl senior u. But she told me is fine that age doesn't really matter. Which I complied with her. But lying about her age. Also she lied about her tribe. Where she told me she was from isn't where her parents are from. Infact I never knew whe speaks & understand her tribe. She kept pretending etc. Not until I became close to her family, I noticed all these things. Well, then I felt I ve already entered. And I don't ve problem with her real tribe. But why keep lying etc.
Prolly cos they are known to be fetishism & all that. But hey guys! Her family isn't like that. They are actually nice people.
Her birthday last year, she celebrated it. I came from where I do my contract works with two of my friends to her birthday venue. A pub close to our house. She invited all her colleagues. She danced one funny dance with one particular guy (Ezekiel) not real name. I wasn't comfortable with that! Cos this same guy has been a suspect. They both talk on phone often. Won't lie, I go through her phone. After the birthday party, I went inside. 5days after the birthday, I went to hustle as usual. Getting home that day, I was feeling awkward. Went outside to sit. She joined me & was asking me what's wrong. I said nothing. She persisted in knowing. I asked her While I was away. Did anyone come to the house. She thought I knew. She now said ehhh!! Same Ezekiel came to the house. I asked her u didn't call to inform me, this same guy I ve been talking about?? If I hadn't asked, u wouldn't ve told me. It resulted to quarrel. For the first time in my life, I raised my hand ✋ on a lady. With that vexation, I slapped her. She picked up her phone & called her parents. Well, later one they said I will buy drink to go apologise to the dad. Which I did.
Note; we ain't married yet. They ve been forcing me to come do something, I ve been post poning the introduction. The dad said he wants to see a member of my family atleast. They day I scheduled to go with my elder brother and sister. My elder brother fell ill & was taken to hospital."strange" and they ve cooked and were waiting for us. So as not to dissapoint them. Had to go to my uncles house that day. Explained everything to him. Luckily he agreed to go with I & my sister. We went. Not knowing they ve already arranged list of introduction to give to us. She whispered to my ear � that the dad & mom are with list oh. I told her but that wasn't the plan. We only came cos daddy said he wants to know my family members. Well, Las Las we took the list. & they took our hot drink we brought. Cos my uncle said we should go with drink since it's our first visit.
Before I forget. Remember I said two of my frnds came to her birthday with me. They came with car. After the birthday. They went to there hotel with two of my so called baby mama's colleagues/frnds. The next day my fwnds told me wat happened between them & they two girls. The girls slept with them till day break. I was ashamed sha. I told my woman about the stuffs. Asked her where she made such frnds. Well that's bygone.
Again, it was when I moved in with her that I found out this lady puts on waist beads & leg chains etc. That one aside sha.
I travelled to Lagos sometimes last year, I didn't tell my best friend who's a pastor. Cos I know what he's capable of doing when am not around. And guys my fear happened. I took flight ✈ for that movement. So I kinda posted it on my status. He saw it and asked guy, u travelled. I said yeah.we spoke that evening cos when I travel like that, I send him to cover up with work stuffs for me. Cos he lost his job in Portharcourt 2020 too. So I do carry him along in my contract work stuffs. So the evening of the day I travelled, I called him to know how his day went. Not knowing this dude went to my house while I was away. He didn't tell me, my woman didn't tell me either. I came back after a week. He came to the house as usual. He now said ah ah, u guys ve subscribed gotv. For my mind I said how this man take know say our subscription expired. Cos I subscribed it when I came back cos of my son. He loves cartoon.
So when I went to see my friend off. I asked him, guy seems u came around when I travelled. He said oh yeah. That he came. So when I got home, I asked madam how far, my frnd been come here when I travelled, I expected a Yes or No. She asked me if he told me he came here, omoh that night eh, we had issues. Not knowing I ve gone through her phone already and saw some chats between him & my frnd. Not entirely something bad. But that one was telling madam I ve missed u oh.she didn't reply him. She was telling him another thing entirely. So when we were having that issue that night, madam deleted her chats with the guy. And left old chats. Stuffs like how are u, I'm fine etc. She deleted the incriminating chats.
Note; another thing that's confusing me too, anytime we have issues & I suspect her, she swears a lot. She swears with Bible sometimes. And it gives me concerns too. Could it be she's not doing anything. Am I just been insecured. Well I neva said I caught her cheating. I'm not just comfortable with stuffs I see etc. These are just few I feel like sharing.
So a lot happened late last year, I went to her family to tell them am no longer interested. They said I will return the list with my uncle so they can return our drink too. Which I & my uncle went there. Getting there my uncle was trying to make peace ✌. But the papa said something wey vex my uncle. Said am accusing her daughter of cheating etc. That I insulted him. Told him daddy I never said I caught ur daughter cheating. I always come to u anytime we ve issues. These and these are things I'm noticing about ur daughter. I expected u to caution her. The man said I should pack my stuffs and leave her daughters house. House wey I dey pay 150k yearly for rent. Well. I started looking for house. I stayed in hotel for some days till I finally moved out of the house. Took just my bags. Every other things belong to her, foam, TV, freezer, etc. Aside the washing machine I bought for her in 2019 when she was heavy. But I didn't carry it. I left it cos she would still need it in washing of clothes. I ve my own washing machine too in my room in South West there.
When I left for the new house I rented. 1hr distance from her. I still do come to see my boy. I go to his school to pick him up sometimes. I still send money to her account for school fees etc. She said she wants to go back to her parents house instead of staying here all alone with our son. Inside of me I know if she goes back to her parents house, seeing my boy would be difficult. So I sent 100k to her account to renew the house rent. That I will balance the 50k later. She didn't even say thank u. I use am yab am sha. She only said she will think about it if she's to renew the rent or moved to her family house.
This lady blackmails me emotionally with that boy. He says stuffs like if I leave, I should forget about this boy. She will remarry & change the boy's name to the new husband's name etc. Another blackmail she uses on me is "I want to repeat what my dad did" cos I told her everything about myself. How my dad abandoned my mom when she was carrying me in her belly. Cos my mom had 3 of my other siblings, her husband died then. After several years, She mate my dad. Even my immediate sis gave me 12yrs gap. So u can imagine how long my mom stayed before meeting my dad. Well, to cut it short. When my dad's people found out she had other children. They stopped him from marrying my mom. The story long sha. But the man locked up from pregnancy. No upkeep nothing nothing. I saw him last 15yrs ago sha. But we are intouch. Like we talk on phone & all of that. And I ve long forgiven the man. I love him still.
So u see, I told my woman everything rite from when we were dating. So now madam the use am blackmail me emotionally, that I want to repeat what my dad did etc. Well, that doesn't really get to me. Cos I ve made up my mind. I'm not ending up with her. Never!!.

Last 4weeks, she called that she was arrested by our landlady. I went to the station to meet them. Getting there, she was arrested cos of #6,500. Sucking of soakaway pit etc. The woman didn't arrest her cos of house rent oh. Meanwhile I ve asked her if she has given the woman the 100k I gave her earlier. She said she had given her 20k. Lies. She didn't give the woman anything. I don't know what she used 100k for.
Well, I paid the 6,500 why she was arrested. I bailed her too with 3k. Her dad was there too. Cos he's a retired police officer. So there at the police station, the landlady said she gatz to pack. Besides our rent has been due since 3months ago.
While at the station, both of them were asked how long ve they been living together. One said 5yrs, the other said 6yrs. I was confused. Cos according to her we moved in there 2019 when she was heavy. So why am I hearing 5 & 6 yrs from both. Hmm!!
2019 when she gave me the impression that she has gotten where we will stay. When I visit, I saw one guy in that compound "Richard" not real name. I knew the guy when I was working in Portharcourt before I was transferred to South West in 2017. Then I was dating this my woman. This Richard used to be her colleague then. So I was surprised to see the guy living in same compound with us. How come I asked her, she said she too was surprised to see that the guy lives in the same compound. Didn't go down with me. I overlooked. Cos then I do come once in a month or so. That same year my people. I saw picture of him and this same Richard in a club. Not bar or eatery. Club. I asked what's this shit. She said it was when they did there end of year party at the office. They decided to go club. All there colleagues. But pic I saw was just two of them sitting very close to each etc. Well, her explanation didn't go down well with me. The Richard's room is a room before our own.

So back to why I was surprised they landlady & madam saying they ve been living together for 5yrs. I said I will find out. So later on. I called the landlady on phone to apologise for everything that happened. Insults etc. Cos I doubt the woman went to police station cos of 6,500. She might ve insulted her and all that. Cos I know her.
So while on phone with the woman. She said I should be careful with that lady. That she doesn't know if I ve married her already or we are still doing courtship. She said that was the reason why "Richard" didn't marry her cos of her character omoh. I pretended. Like I don't know the Richard. The woman too became shocked. She thought I knew. She said they lived together in that her house. Richards room. When they separated. My woman begged her to finish up the room we lived in so she & her husband would move in. Cos she gave them that impression we were married. And I played along too.
But my thoughts are, why didn't this lady look for a house far from a guy she had lived with before. I lived there with them from 2019 till January this year. I never for once thought both of them had lived as husband & wife before. If not for the pics I saw on her phone. Now the so called Richard is married and had moved out of the compound early last year. Who knows what goes through that guys mind whenever I passed or he sees me. "See this one wey I Don lash em woman wella" stuffs like that. Not sure sha. No wonder she's not comfortable anytime am talking to landlady etc. She feels the will open her nyash then.
When this lady gave birth, she collected 100k from me as hospital Bill. Not through CS oh. She spent just 2days in the hospital. I told her then to carry out a test on the boy while at the hospital. To know his genotype. He said they doctor said its still early. I didn't follow it up again till now. Cos I wanted to know his genotype. Cos she's AA, and am AA. Birth certificate of my boy, I ve not seen before. I keep asking her, one story or the other.
I went to pick up the boy from school two weeks ago, she has given instructions to the school not to be allowing me pick the boy. They lied to me that my boy had been picked by his mom. I knew they were lying. Well! This month public holiday, I called her that I want to take my son out. She said I should call her dad & take permission from her dad. For real?
Cos she had moved to her father's house since after the police incident.
I ve also locked up. I'm not calling her again, nor her family. Never!!! I won't do it. Whatever they feel like doing with the boy, let them do. I can't be sending money to her account, and I won't ve access to my son. If oga grows up and decides to look for me, no wam. I'm sure they will feed him with lots of lies. But even 20yrs from now. I cam print out my statements of acct all the money I sent to his mom's account, before they took him away. I never intended abandoning him.
I'm even tired of typing. I just summarise everything. Story long abeg.
I ve learnt my lessons in a bitter way. And trust me I ve moved on. I no wan even reason the matter of going to welfare, dragging custodian of the child. Let them ve him. I hear a lot of stuffs like, are u letting ur child go? He's ur first blood etc. No wam! He's my first blood, but I no go kill myself na. I no wan involve myself for anything police or welfare abeg.
Those gender! Thank God I didn't fall for there pressure of marriage stuffs I was facing from she & her parents. Las Las this gurl turn me to sp*rm donor. Maybe that's wat she ever wanted � �.
Such a cute boy. My carbon copy guys. I don't know how that happened. But boy looks exactly like me. Still doesn't guarantee am the biological father sha. Till DNA confirms. But I no wan even reason that one, like I rightly said. Let her go. I'm not dragging the boy with him.
Omoh! Gatz to hit the bed abeg. I feel a bit relieved sharing this.

You have done well.

I don't know what to say but for your sake it's best you the live the woman and start living your life.

They boy will come back to you, they always do.

Just send him gifts from tike to time. Write latter's to him and send him during his birthdays..

Create a bank acceand send depoemoney from time to time in his name, when he is off age or when he comes back give those to him so he knows you never forgot him.

placeofallure:
Emmy417, do you used to watch that Busta Rhymes car show on STV, where your car gets refurbished?

You've just been punked!

love-vendor my ride

That child is not yours

In issues like this, u won't see the caused gender contributing anything here.
I hv being hammering it here on daily bases that all these daughters of eve are just opportunist. They dont desever cool guys, they deserve mad and mad guys. OP, u bleeped yourself up by telling d bitch more about your family, even your wife, there are some family stuffs u are not suppose to disclose to her bcs one day, they would use it against u.
Something hidden about those genders
Garden was cool and good until woman came and destroy everything, likewise op was cool and calm until woman brought your leg outside.
Jah himself no marry.
Angels no marry.
24 elders in Heaven no marry.
Jesus himself no marry
Great Prophets in d Bible no marry
No woman in d 12 apostles
Satan himself no marry rather Satan dey use women against men.
I must get to know d hidden facts why is so

Emmy417:
Thanks bro!
I think this simp of a thing could be as a result of been trained by my mom alone. No man in my life to scold me etc. Well, she really tried in training me. She did a very very good job. It wasn't easy then at all!! But I ve come to realise in this life, that been too sissy in life, people wouldal always takeadvantage.

I'm glad you left her silly ass. it's not over yet bro, she'll continue using your son (if at all he's yours) to blackmail you. Don't give in, maintain frame. Put yourself first in everything you do.

Highman56:
Anyone that is not blind will know that his narration was on an excellent level

Yes, it was excellent for your level and his maybe.

Here, No room for mediocrity.

Yeah! Noted.

Maxxim:
My eyes have already gone sore with these your writeups, but to be more sincere you deserve all you experienced.
This is what happens when you fail to examine a lady over only the sex she has to offer, moreover our traditions here in Nigeria makes things more easier for us, what happened to making your due findings about her and her family.
Op you fvcked up, you don't have to run behind redpill to cover your shame, learn from this and build your moral lifestyle if you'll like to create a healthy family in the future.

Yeah. Thanks bro

blinking001:
I'm glad you left her silly ass. it's not over yet bro, she'll continue using your son (if at all he's yours) to blackmail you. Don't give in, maintain frame. Put yourself first in everything you do.

emmanuelbrown26:
In issues like this, u won't see the caused gender contributing anything here.
I hv being hammering it here on daily bases that all these daughters of eve are just opportunist. They dont desever cool guys, they deserve mad and mad guys. OP, u bleeped yourself up by telling d bitch more about your family, even your wife, there are some family stuffs u are not suppose to disclose to her bcs one day, they would use it against u.
Something hidden about those genders
Garden was cool and good until woman came and destroy everything, likewise op was cool and calm until woman brought your leg outside.
Jah himself no marry.
Angels no marry.
24 elders in Heaven no marry.
Jesus himself no marry
Great Prophets in d Bible no marry
No woman in d 12 apostles
Satan himself no marry rather Satan dey use women against men.
I must get to know d hidden facts why is so

Make your point without bringing the scripture
Its obvious you know little about the Scripture
Cephas was married
James was married even while with Christ, among others.
Its only Paul that we all know that the Bible say he did not marry (not even among the 12)
And who are the 24 elders in heaven, surely you know them right? You need to have an idea before running your mouth

Medianna:
Make your point without bringing the scripture
Its obvious you know little about the Scripture
Cyphas was married
James was married even while with Christ among others.
Its only Paul that we all know that the Bible say he did not marry (not even among the 12)
And who are the 24 elders in heaven, surely you know them right? You need to have an idea before running your mouth

Did I mention Peter and James?

It's crazy what guys go through all in the name of love and wanting to love and also wanting to be


Op, there's no long talk here. A comment here made by one Martinez, lol read it,read it again, read it the third time. Now locate one "Reality every guy...." Thread here on romance section
Read the first 50pages
I promise you, you won't be the same again.



Truly, nice guys finish last
Terrible, but that's reality

emmanuelbrown26:
Did I mention Peter and James?

You did mention 12 apostles
You did mention 24 elders.
So ?
Hope its not what I'm thinking?
Oh my God!!

Emmy417:
Well, that's if they will come back. Cos she told she will single handle the well being of the boy. She doesn't need to sleep with anyman for money. She said so.
That worst case, she will remarry & change the boy's name.
I ve also heard from people that there side, they claim children a lot. They don't leave there children for the men etc.
I Don free them abeg,

The best thing you can do is to free them..
As for her claiming the child and not allowing you access to him.. let her be and the child..
Your sperm is working.. fucvk and born other children and move on..

If you try to force your self to be in the boy's life.. she would fight you both physically and spiritually and you may not be alive to say the story in years to come..
Your dad let your mom be and never bothered reaching out.. Guess what.. he is still alive and kicking and living his life..
You better leave that YOLO- You Only Live Once ..

Enough said.

Medianna:
You did mention 12 apostles
You did mention 24 elders.
So ?
Hope its not what I'm thinking?
Oh my God!!

And so?
They didn't marry na

emmanuelbrown26:
And so?
They didn't marry na

Go Sunday school, you will say no
So you don't know that peter and James are even pillars among the apostles
And the 12 apostles are in the 24 elders!!
And wetin pain me pass be say your name na Emma

Medianna:
Go Sunday school, you will say no
So you don't know that peter and James are even pillars among the apostles
And the 12 apostles are in the 24 elders!!
And wetin pain me pass be say your name na Emma

Forget about d name Emma, what are u dragging about now?

emmanuelbrown26:
Forget about d name Emma, what are u dragging about now?

Some of the apostles were married
Some of the prophets were married too

Emmy417:
Yeah! Noted.

Never meant to be harsh boss, but sometimes the pointers are out there glaring at you. I pray you meet someone who'll be a better partner in the future.
Cheers!

Medianna:
Some of the apostles were married
Some of the prophets were married too

U are repeating what I said na, I said great prophets no marry

Couldn't finish reading because if anger... I like flog this Op centre of him brain

emmanuelbrown26:
U are repeating what I said na, I said great prophets no marry

No need of arguing with you sir.
Its very obvious you don't have adequate knowledge about the subject of the argument.

Medianna:
No need of arguing with you sir.
Its very obvious you don't have adequate knowledge about the subject of the argument.

Better ma