Good evening my people, I'm gonna summarise everything, so I don't bore you guys.
So I parted ways with my so called baby mama earlier this year. We started living together when she took in. I was working somewhere in South West. While she on the other hand works in Portharcourt. I took responsibility of paying house rents for the past 3yrs +.
When I lost my job in 2020, God's Grace I got another contract in Portharcourt. Had to fully move in with her.
Note; 80% of the properties are hers. My whole properties are still in South West. I ve gat a one bedroom apartment there still.
So While living together, first I found out she lied about her age, cos I saw her WAEC result. She wrote WAEC when am still in JS2. How's that possible?? I confronted her, she kept saying all manner of things to cover up. And that was last time I saw that result. She hid it or rather took it to somewhere far from our home.
When I first introduced her to my sis 2019, she was the one that noticed the age gap. She told me bros, this girl senior u. But she told me is fine that age doesn't really matter. Which I complied with her. But lying about her age. Also she lied about her tribe. Where she told me she was from isn't where her parents are from. Infact I never knew whe speaks & understand her tribe. She kept pretending etc. Not until I became close to her family, I noticed all these things. Well, then I felt I ve already entered. And I don't ve problem with her real tribe. But why keep lying etc.
Prolly cos they are known to be fetishism & all that. But hey guys! Her family isn't like that. They are actually nice people.
Her birthday last year, she celebrated it. I came from where I do my contract works with two of my friends to her birthday venue. A pub close to our house. She invited all her colleagues. She danced one funny dance with one particular guy (Ezekiel) not real name. I wasn't comfortable with that! Cos this same guy has been a suspect. They both talk on phone often. Won't lie, I go through her phone. After the birthday party, I went inside. 5days after the birthday, I went to hustle as usual. Getting home that day, I was feeling awkward. Went outside to sit. She joined me & was asking me what's wrong. I said nothing. She persisted in knowing. I asked her While I was away. Did anyone come to the house. She thought I knew. She now said ehhh!! Same Ezekiel came to the house. I asked her u didn't call to inform me, this same guy I ve been talking about?? If I hadn't asked, u wouldn't ve told me. It resulted to quarrel. For the first time in my life, I raised my hand ✋ on a lady. With that vexation, I slapped her. She picked up her phone & called her parents. Well, later one they said I will buy drink to go apologise to the dad. Which I did.
Note; we ain't married yet. They ve been forcing me to come do something, I ve been post poning the introduction. The dad said he wants to see a member of my family atleast. They day I scheduled to go with my elder brother and sister. My elder brother fell ill & was taken to hospital."strange" and they ve cooked and were waiting for us. So as not to dissapoint them. Had to go to my uncles house that day. Explained everything to him. Luckily he agreed to go with I & my sister. We went. Not knowing they ve already arranged list of introduction to give to us. She whispered to my ear � that the dad & mom are with list oh. I told her but that wasn't the plan. We only came cos daddy said he wants to know my family members. Well, Las Las we took the list. & they took our hot drink we brought. Cos my uncle said we should go with drink since it's our first visit.
Before I forget. Remember I said two of my frnds came to her birthday with me. They came with car. After the birthday. They went to there hotel with two of my so called baby mama's colleagues/frnds. The next day my fwnds told me wat happened between them & they two girls. The girls slept with them till day break. I was ashamed sha. I told my woman about the stuffs. Asked her where she made such frnds. Well that's bygone.
Again, it was when I moved in with her that I found out this lady puts on waist beads & leg chains etc. That one aside sha.
I travelled to Lagos sometimes last year, I didn't tell my best friend who's a pastor. Cos I know what he's capable of doing when am not around. And guys my fear happened. I took flight ✈ for that movement. So I kinda posted it on my status. He saw it and asked guy, u travelled. I said yeah.we spoke that evening cos when I travel like that, I send him to cover up with work stuffs for me. Cos he lost his job in Portharcourt 2020 too. So I do carry him along in my contract work stuffs. So the evening of the day I travelled, I called him to know how his day went. Not knowing this dude went to my house while I was away. He didn't tell me, my woman didn't tell me either. I came back after a week. He came to the house as usual. He now said ah ah, u guys ve subscribed gotv. For my mind I said how this man take know say our subscription expired. Cos I subscribed it when I came back cos of my son. He loves cartoon.
So when I went to see my friend off. I asked him, guy seems u came around when I travelled. He said oh yeah. That he came. So when I got home, I asked madam how far, my frnd been come here when I travelled, I expected a Yes or No. She asked me if he told me he came here, omoh that night eh, we had issues. Not knowing I ve gone through her phone already and saw some chats between him & my frnd. Not entirely something bad. But that one was telling madam I ve missed u oh.she didn't reply him. She was telling him another thing entirely. So when we were having that issue that night, madam deleted her chats with the guy. And left old chats. Stuffs like how are u, I'm fine etc. She deleted the incriminating chats.
Note; another thing that's confusing me too, anytime we have issues & I suspect her, she swears a lot. She swears with Bible sometimes. And it gives me concerns too. Could it be she's not doing anything. Am I just been insecured. Well I neva said I caught her cheating. I'm not just comfortable with stuffs I see etc. These are just few I feel like sharing.
So a lot happened late last year, I went to her family to tell them am no longer interested. They said I will return the list with my uncle so they can return our drink too. Which I & my uncle went there. Getting there my uncle was trying to make peace ✌. But the papa said something wey vex my uncle. Said am accusing her daughter of cheating etc. That I insulted him. Told him daddy I never said I caught ur daughter cheating. I always come to u anytime we ve issues. These and these are things I'm noticing about ur daughter. I expected u to caution her. The man said I should pack my stuffs and leave her daughters house. House wey I dey pay 150k yearly for rent. Well. I started looking for house. I stayed in hotel for some days till I finally moved out of the house. Took just my bags. Every other things belong to her, foam, TV, freezer, etc. Aside the washing machine I bought for her in 2019 when she was heavy. But I didn't carry it. I left it cos she would still need it in washing of clothes. I ve my own washing machine too in my room in South West there.
When I left for the new house I rented. 1hr distance from her. I still do come to see my boy. I go to his school to pick him up sometimes. I still send money to her account for school fees etc. She said she wants to go back to her parents house instead of staying here all alone with our son. Inside of me I know if she goes back to her parents house, seeing my boy would be difficult. So I sent 100k to her account to renew the house rent. That I will balance the 50k later. She didn't even say thank u. I use am yab am sha. She only said she will think about it if she's to renew the rent or moved to her family house.
This lady blackmails me emotionally with that boy. He says stuffs like if I leave, I should forget about this boy. She will remarry & change the boy's name to the new husband's name etc. Another blackmail she uses on me is "I want to repeat what my dad did" cos I told her everything about myself. How my dad abandoned my mom when she was carrying me in her belly. Cos my mom had 3 of my other siblings, her husband died then. After several years, She mate my dad. Even my immediate sis gave me 12yrs gap. So u can imagine how long my mom stayed before meeting my dad. Well, to cut it short. When my dad's people found out she had other children. They stopped him from marrying my mom. The story long sha. But the man locked up from pregnancy. No upkeep nothing nothing. I saw him last 15yrs ago sha. But we are intouch. Like we talk on phone & all of that. And I ve long forgiven the man. I love him still.
So u see, I told my woman everything rite from when we were dating. So now madam the use am blackmail me emotionally, that I want to repeat what my dad did etc. Well, that doesn't really get to me. Cos I ve made up my mind. I'm not ending up with her. Never!!.

Last 4weeks, she called that she was arrested by our landlady. I went to the station to meet them. Getting there, she was arrested cos of #6,500. Sucking of soakaway pit etc. The woman didn't arrest her cos of house rent oh. Meanwhile I ve asked her if she has given the woman the 100k I gave her earlier. She said she had given her 20k. Lies. She didn't give the woman anything. I don't know what she used 100k for.
Well, I paid the 6,500 why she was arrested. I bailed her too with 3k. Her dad was there too. Cos he's a retired police officer. So there at the police station, the landlady said she gatz to pack. Besides our rent has been due since 3months ago.
While at the station, both of them were asked how long ve they been living together. One said 5yrs, the other said 6yrs. I was confused. Cos according to her we moved in there 2019 when she was heavy. So why am I hearing 5 & 6 yrs from both. Hmm!!
2019 when she gave me the impression that she has gotten where we will stay. When I visit, I saw one guy in that compound "Richard" not real name. I knew the guy when I was working in Portharcourt before I was transferred to South West in 2017. Then I was dating this my woman. This Richard used to be her colleague then. So I was surprised to see the guy living in same compound with us. How come I asked her, she said she too was surprised to see that the guy lives in the same compound. Didn't go down with me. I overlooked. Cos then I do come once in a month or so. That same year my people. I saw picture of him and this same Richard in a club. Not bar or eatery. Club. I asked what's this shit. She said it was when they did there end of year party at the office. They decided to go club. All there colleagues. But pic I saw was just two of them sitting very close to each etc. Well, her explanation didn't go down well with me. The Richard's room is a room before our own.

So back to why I was surprised they landlady & madam saying they ve been living together for 5yrs. I said I will find out. So later on. I called the landlady on phone to apologise for everything that happened. Insults etc. Cos I doubt the woman went to police station cos of 6,500. She might ve insulted her and all that. Cos I know her.
So while on phone with the woman. She said I should be careful with that lady. That she doesn't know if I ve married her already or we are still doing courtship. She said that was the reason why "Richard" didn't marry her cos of her character omoh. I pretended. Like I don't know the Richard. The woman too became shocked. She thought I knew. She said they lived together in that her house. Richards room. When they separated. My woman begged her to finish up the room we lived in so she & her husband would move in. Cos she gave them that impression we were married. And I played along too.
But my thoughts are, why didn't this lady look for a house far from a guy she had lived with before. I lived there with them from 2019 till January this year. I never for once thought both of them had lived as husband & wife before. If not for the pics I saw on her phone. Now the so called Richard is married and had moved out of the compound early last year. Who knows what goes through that guys mind whenever I passed or he sees me. "See this one wey I Don lash em woman wella" stuffs like that. Not sure sha. No wonder she's not comfortable anytime am talking to landlady etc. She feels the will open her nyash then.
When this lady gave birth, she collected 100k from me as hospital Bill. Not through CS oh. She spent just 2days in the hospital. I told her then to carry out a test on the boy while at the hospital. To know his genotype. He said they doctor said its still early. I didn't follow it up again till now. Cos I wanted to know his genotype. Cos she's AA, and am AA. Birth certificate of my boy, I ve not seen before. I keep asking her, one story or the other.
I went to pick up the boy from school two weeks ago, she has given instructions to the school not to be allowing me pick the boy. They lied to me that my boy had been picked by his mom. I knew they were lying. Well! This month public holiday, I called her that I want to take my son out. She said I should call her dad & take permission from her dad. For real?
Cos she had moved to her father's house since after the police incident.
I ve also locked up. I'm not calling her again, nor her family. Never!!! I won't do it. Whatever they feel like doing with the boy, let them do. I can't be sending money to her account, and I won't ve access to my son. If oga grows up and decides to look for me, no wam. I'm sure they will feed him with lots of lies. But even 20yrs from now. I cam print out my statements of acct all the money I sent to his mom's account, before they took him away. I never intended abandoning him.
I'm even tired of typing. I just summarise everything. Story long abeg.
I ve learnt my lessons in a bitter way. And trust me I ve moved on. I no wan even reason the matter of going to welfare, dragging custodian of the child. Let them ve him. I hear a lot of stuffs like, are u letting ur child go? He's ur first blood etc. No wam! He's my first blood, but I no go kill myself na. I no wan involve myself for anything police or welfare abeg.
Those gender! Thank God I didn't fall for there pressure of marriage stuffs I was facing from she & her parents. Las Las this gurl turn me to sp*rm donor. Maybe that's wat she ever wanted � �.
Such a cute boy. My carbon copy guys. I don't know how that happened. But boy looks exactly like me. Still doesn't guarantee am the biological father sha. Till DNA confirms. But I no wan even reason that one, like I rightly said. Let her go. I'm not dragging the boy with him.
Omoh! Gatz to hit the bed abeg. I feel a bit relieved sharing this.

You have to be ruthless in cutting off women who show red flags before it gets complicated.
Good thing you've removed yourself from the situation.

That girl doesn't care about you one bit, to her you are just a utility and Richard has been banging her while you are away, I guarantee it. Na runs girl you dey date, evening newspaper runs girl.

You are a nice guy, dating a girl who is in love with Richard and you are probably helping her train Richards child.

It pays to take the red pill. You are a simp and blue pill fellow; this is why you made many silly decisions. Hope you take the red pill.

Make sure you also don't forget to swallow eba

This your story is very very long

Rules you must always have in mind when dealing with the Eve GENDER


Rule number;

1. Never move into a woman’s apartment, House, Building or Structure.

2. Don’t fall so hard into infatuation thinking it’s love! (If I ask you to give me a good reason you love her? You will most probably say big ass, boobs, or light skinned and nothing tangible)

3. Pray very well before associating yourself with the millions of demons parading themselves as hot Nigerian girls, cause only a very very few of them are wifeable.

OP good morning, I'm happy you've woken up.
This is the almost the same thing my girlfriend did, she went out with a guy that have been toasting her cos in her own words, she just did it to get the guy off her tracks cos the guy have been disturbing her, I just laughed at her in my mind and changed my mind towards her, as of the moment she doesn't know that she's just dating herself all by her self.

I'll advise you to do the following things, don't leave the child to the mother alone, fight her legally to be in the life of your child. Don't let her cut you off. Don't let an unrepentant/ promiscuous liar train your child.

1_ Sue for DNA test of the child in a court of law, you have to know for sure that it's your child first.

2_ while you are doing the first, also apply for a shared custody of the child between you two so that she can't stop you from seeing your child or make you take permission from another man to see your child.

3_ the child must never visit her parents without your knowledge and permission.


4_ renew the house rent if you can do so but pay directly into the landlady's account.


That's all I can say for now.

Wow I must commend ur English one of the best on nairaland.Nigerian girls are not good or nice people.They are selfish and seek their own satisfaction it's bad you learned it late.

Go to Court to have a part in your child's life.

That woman is not good for you.

And please live a celibate life, walk with Jesus,and He will direct you into a peaceful union.

Mtsheew.
One woman decided to change the narrative of your entire life negatively just like that.
If you like become more than red piller na still your life e go effect.
You will just become like your baby mama some day.

Modified.
I know they will look for you because you are their meal ticket.
She's too greedy to keep that child for long unless you decide to show concern again.
She will come and dump him for you one day

Emmy417, do you used to watch that Busta Rhymes car show on STV, where your car gets refurbished?

You've just been punked!

Highman56:
Wow I must commend ur English one of the best on nairaland.Nigerian girls are not good or nice people.They are selfish and seek their own satisfaction it's bad you learned it late.

Best English?? Jesus wept!

Damnnnn!!!! Bro... those Gender just bad and Confused.

@OP,pls Don't listen to all those nonsense advices that u sud fight it all for d son because he is ur 1st blood..the more u show ur desperation for d child,the more u become vulnerable n prey to their attack..trust me,as times goes on, they will come back with all those craps that ur son need this and that(skul n health stuff).nah dat moment u go lay down ur own rules concerning the custodian and every other stuffs about the boy..pls don't bow down to all those blackmail by that dog(she see it as ur weak point and want to fight u with it)....

Let me shock you brother. You see that boy, he may not be your son. He may be Richard's son which might be why she insisted on staying in that compound, close to him or it may even be their arrangement. Find a way to DNA test on that child and put a stop to her manipulations.

Op this story be long biology and economics note oo

Like people have said above, you saw the signs or red flag but you were thinking she'll change because the ass and boob are intact..
Changes comes from within..
Please go and do DNA test o..
Like you stated about her friends, you can see that they're olosho (that means they're are almost on the same league)
Fight for your son
Don't allow osholo to train your child.

Highman56:
Wow I must commend ur English one of the best on nairaland.Nigerian girls are not good or nice people.They are selfish and seek their own satisfaction it's bad you learned it late.

Wetin conscine English with this post, Oga teacher.

As if English na ur accestra language...

Mufu olosha oko

I was meant to understand that the both separated, beforeI started living with her. So I don't know sure if he still bangs her while I'm away. Most likely they both were still practicing Okafor's Law! Yeah.

czarr:
You have to be ruthless in cutting off women who show red flags before it gets complicated.
Good thing you've removed yourself from the situation.

That girl doesn't care about you one bit, to her you are just a utility and Richard has been banging her while you are away, I guarantee it. Na runs girl you dey date, evening newspaper runs girl.

You are a nice guy, dating a girl who is in love with Richard and you are probably helping her train Richards child.

Thanks bro!
I think this simp of a thing could be as a result of been trained by my mom alone. No man in my life to scold me etc. Well, she really tried in training me. She did a very good job. It wasn't easy then at all!! But I ve come to realise in this life, that been too sissy in life, people would always take advantage.

Martinez39s:
It pays to take the red pill. You are a simp and blue pill fellow; this is why you made many silly decisions. Hope you take the red pill.

placeofallure:


Best English?? Jesus wept!

Anyone that is not blind will know that his narration was on an excellent level

Truth is, the suing part is what I don't want to do. I just want to let them be honestly speaking.
Renewal of rent, I pointed out that she had moved to her parents house after the police case. While me on the other hand rented a house & moved out earlier this year.

Ekejoestar:
OP good morning, I'm happy you've woken up.
This is the almost the same thing my girlfriend did, she went out with a guy that have been toasting her cos in her own words, she just did it to get the guy off her tracks cos the guy have been disturbing her, I just laughed at her in my mind and changed my mind towards her, as of the moment she doesn't know that she's just dating herself all by her self.

I'll advise you to do the following things, don't leave the child to the mother alone, fight her legally to be in the life of your child. Don't let her cut you off. Don't let an unrepentant/ promiscuous liar train your child.

1_ Sue for DNA test of the child in a court of law, you have to know for sure that it's your child first.

2_ while you are doing the first, also apply for a shared custody of the child between you two so that she can't stop you from seeing your child or make you take permission from another man to see your child.

3_ the child must never visit her parents without your knowledge and permission.


4_ renew the house rent if you can do so but pay directly into the landlady's account.


That's all I can say for now.

Tboymessiah:


Wetin conscine English with this post, Oga teacher.

As if English na ur accestra language...

Mufu olosha oko

You are asking what does English have to do with this??
Was it igbo,hausa,efik,nupe,yoruba or chinese he used to communicate his narrative?
Just go one side I don't feel like insulting today

Indeed, I learnt late!
Thanks though.

Highman56:
Wow I must commend ur English one of the best on nairaland.Nigerian girls are not good or nice people.They are selfish and seek their own satisfaction it's bad you learned it late.

Boss, be calming down.
I don'tknowif I made some errors in typing all those, I ve not really have the time to go through them.
One love bro!!

Highman56:

You are asking what does English have to do with this??
Was it igbo,hausa,efik,nupe,yoruba or chinese he used to communicate his narrative?
Just go one side I don't feel like insulting today

Swrs!

HopeNeverDies:
Damnnnn!!!! Bro... those Gender just bad and Confused.

Oga stay away from that b1tch and her family,if that kid is yours he will surely come back.

Well, that's if they will come back. Cos she told she will single handle the well being of the boy. She doesn't need to sleep with anyman for money. She said so.
That worst case, she will remarry & change the boy's name.
I ve also heard from people that there side, they claim children a lot. They don't leave there children for the men etc.
I Don free them abeg,

omotoshodontee1:
@OP,pls Don't listen to all those nonsense advices that u sud fight it all for d son because he is ur 1st blood..the more u show ur desperation for d child,the more u become vulnerable n prey to their attack..trust me,as times goes on, they will come back with all those craps that ur son need this and that(skul n health stuff).nah dat moment u go lay down ur own rules concerning the custodian and every other stuffs about the boy..pls don't bow down to all those blackmail by that dog(she see it as ur weak point and want to fight u with it)....

Sure! That I ve done already.
Thanks tho.

biggace:
Oga stay away from that b1tch and her family,if that kid is yours he will surely come back.

Hahaha.
No wam sha!

placeofallure:
Emmy417, do you used to watch that Busta Rhymes car show on STV, where your car gets refurbished?

You've just been punked!

Bro, na this fighting I no wan indulge myself in. True! Make she carry pikin ago abeg.

Alapojames:
Op this story be long biology and economics note oo

Like people have said above, you saw the signs or red flag but you were thinking she'll change because the ass and boob are intact..
Changes comes from within..
Please go and do DNA test o..
Like you stated about her friends, you can see that they're olosho (that means they're are almost on the same league)
Fight for your son
Don't allow osholo to train your child.