How Do I Go About My Father's Burial Arrangements? - Family (2)

How Do I Go About My Father's Burial Arrangements? - Family (2) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum › Nairaland General › Family › How Do I Go About My Father's Burial Arrangements? (5064 Views)

Re: How Do I Go About My Father's Burial Arrangements? by spiralwedge(m): 11:28pm On Oct 02, 2022

ibechris:
Go and bury your father.

Uncles or villagers can not change anything for the dead.

Would they come and take him to heaven or bring him back to life?

If u have the means while wait for people who have abandoned u guys to cone and decide for u people, except u guys are waiting to be mocked.

Village people na food and anything to eat they are after.

Coolme, take this advice.

Have a solemn service, doesn’t have to be a crowd.

Only let the family know, whenever they come to ask for him. Do not inform them now, since they had abandoned him.

But if you are from the SE, you might want to consult elders in your place on how to go about it. It’s quite different anywhere else.

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Re: How Do I Go About My Father's Burial Arrangements? by frozen70(f): 3:41am On Oct 03, 2022

Cooolme:
So my dad has been sick for couple of years now and just died sadly.
I'm the first son and I've decided to inquire about how burial arrangements are made and also sponsor it solely because his family cut us off, although they tried but later abandoned him. My Mom have decided not to have anything to do with them ever since and also wish to bury him here at our place of residence not in the village.
Please I need you inputs, thanks.

This is a very sensitive decision

I think no matter the issue with your mum and your father family, they have to be involved in the burial

Dont expect money from them because they are not supposed to be financially responsible to your father even while he was sick and now dead

If you guys are having issues with your father family, put it aside if you people are not interested in reconciliation but let there be representatives from your father family to witness the burial

As for your mum, you don't let her decision on your father's burial affects you with your kind men in future

Re: How Do I Go About My Father's Burial Arrangements? by Cooolme(op): 7:49am On Oct 03, 2022

frozen70:
This is a very sensitive decision

I think no matter the issue with your mum and your father family, they have to be involved in the burial

Dont expect money from them because they are not supposed to be financially responsible to your father even while he was sick and now dead

If you guys are having issues with your father family, put it aside if you people are not interested in reconciliation but let there be representatives from your father family to witness the burial

As for your mum, you don't let her decision on your father's burial affects you with your kind men in future

Are you for real?
Someone that put 5 of his siblings through school, made sure they were as comfortable as possible?...he didn't even tell me this, they did.
I don't see why any reasonable person won't take such person as 'part' of their responsibility when it's even their brother.
Btw I never mentioned I'll be needing their financial assistance.

Re: How Do I Go About My Father's Burial Arrangements? by obyrich(m): 8:23am On Oct 03, 2022

Cooolme:
What if they were the one there for him till death?

Why did your dad's siblings back off?

Re: How Do I Go About My Father's Burial Arrangements? by Cooolme(op): 8:59am On Oct 03, 2022

obyrich:
Why did your dad's siblings back off?

Don't really know, maybe they just couldn't keep up. But they're doing well enough financially so I don't know their reason.

Re: How Do I Go About My Father's Burial Arrangements? by frozen70(f): 11:04am On Oct 03, 2022

Cooolme:
Are you for real?
Someone that put 5 of his siblings through school, made sure they were as comfortable as possible?...he didn't even tell me this, they did.
I don't see why any reasonable person won't take such person as 'part' of their responsibility when it's even their brother.
Btw I never mentioned I'll be needing their financial assistance.

What I want you to understand now is that

He may have financed his siblings to school, it's possible they won't pay him back especially when he was sick because they are selfish

That's why i said don't expect anything from them

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Re: How Do I Go About My Father's Burial Arrangements? by Wizywiz(m): 11:17am On Oct 03, 2022

Zonefree:
I'm not sure your late father will be happy with this arrangement.

his is dead ooo...what happiness does he need again grin

Re: How Do I Go About My Father's Burial Arrangements? by JONNYSPUTE(m): 11:34am On Oct 03, 2022

ChybuzzDD:
What would happen

Would they kill,beat or arrest him

It's like you're among those lazy and jobless guys that intimidate and oppress people in the village.

The man's nuclear family, a few friendly relatives and the villagers can sort out the burial, while the few disgruntled relatives can go to hell.
Then, if it were me, those disgruntled relatives who didn't attend the burial would answer queries how and why they killed my old man after the whole burial.
I wouldn't even give you the opportunity to be the aggressor. So, bros, go and sit down because you never jam wahala.

..... Lol. Ignorance. If he can be honest enough to give us update and how everything went after the burial then we shall know who is right. So brother chill. You don't have to use fowl languages on me. I never did to you.

Re: How Do I Go About My Father's Burial Arrangements? by obyrich(m): 4:29pm On Oct 03, 2022

Cooolme:
Don't really know, maybe they just couldn't keep up. But they're doing well enough financially so I don't know their reason.

Try and find out why they backed out.

Re: How Do I Go About My Father's Burial Arrangements? by Nazgul: 6:33pm On Oct 03, 2022

Cooolme:
From the south east sir.

You and your mom should inform your dad's people about his death.... whatever decision you wish to take as to where he would be buried is up to you as the first son, but you must carry his people along.

Re: How Do I Go About My Father's Burial Arrangements? by Templee333(m): 6:47pm On Oct 03, 2022

Zonefree:
I'm not sure your late father will be happy with this arrangement.

late father? Happy? I dnt understand. What concerns the dead with happiness?

Re: How Do I Go About My Father's Burial Arrangements? by Templee333(m): 8:55pm On Oct 03, 2022

Craig24:
This is Africa! If you're from the East, please, make no mistake of burying your father outside his paternal home in his home town. It is a taboo to bury an African MAN outside his ancestral hometown irrespective of the division in his ancestral family The consequences are dire.

The little things people take for granted pertaining to African customs and traditions are of grave importance in the land of the spirits.

You see those doing traditional marriages and burials in the city today are cooking problems their families won't be able to solve in generations to come.

i've heard these lies b4.

Re: How Do I Go About My Father's Burial Arrangements? by Cabazieu: 10:46pm On Oct 03, 2022

Young man, in southeast they don't burial a grown up man they way you intend to burial you dad.
I was in same situation as you 2 years ago. My dad was ill for 3 years and all my uncles didn't care.

When he died i had to inform the eldets in my family. i learnt alot how igbos bury an elder in the family.
You uncle will go to your dads maternal home with some elders in the family including you, for a formal report of your dads dead.
The funny thing about this Igbo traditional, they will never tell them his dead out rightly.

Is a taboo, if you make such mistake, they will put the dead on you, that you killed there sisters son. Just meet your uncle he will lead you.
Never ever bury him in you residence. You will do 2 buriel.
And remember one important thing in burial.
Money doesn't solve everything, just be humble till you put him inside ground. Sorry for your loss.

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Re: How Do I Go About My Father's Burial Arrangements? by JONNYSPUTE(m): 11:12pm On Oct 03, 2022

Cabazieu:
Young man, in southeast they don't burial a grown up man they way you intend to burial you dad.
I was in same situation as you 2 years ago. My dad was ill for 3 years and all my uncles didn't care.

When he died i had to inform the eldets in my family. i learnt alot how igbos bury an elder in the family.
You uncle will go to your dads maternal home with some elders in the family including you, for a formal report of your dads dead.
The funny thing about this Igbo traditional, they will never tell them his dead out rightly.

Is a taboo, if you make such mistake, they will put the dead on you, that you killed there sisters son. Just meet your uncle he will lead you.
Never ever bury him in you residence. You will do 2 buriel.
And remember one important thing in burial.
Money doesn't solve everything, just be humble till you put him inside ground. Sorry for your loss.

.... Don't mind him. Let him be listening to what his fellow kids are saying here. E go soon clear for him eyes.

Re: How Do I Go About My Father's Burial Arrangements? by Craig24: 9:08am On Oct 04, 2022

Templee333:
i've heard these lies b4.

Congratulations, you've read it once again.

It is said that when a dog decides to die it refuses to heed to the words of its owner.

It is also said that the length of a giraffe's neck doesn't guarantee it the privilege to see into the future.

1 Like

Re: How Do I Go About My Father's Burial Arrangements? by Cooolme(op): 9:36am On Oct 04, 2022

Cabazieu:
Young man, in southeast they don't burial a grown up man they way you intend to burial you dad.
I was in same situation as you 2 years ago. My dad was ill for 3 years and all my uncles didn't care.

When he died i had to inform the eldets in my family. i learnt alot how igbos bury an elder in the family.
You uncle will go to your dads maternal home with some elders in the family including you, for a formal report of your dads dead.
The funny thing about this Igbo traditional, they will never tell them his dead out rightly.

Is a taboo, if you make such mistake, they will put the dead on you, that you killed there sisters son. Just meet your uncle he will lead you.
Never ever bury him in you residence. You will do 2 buriel.
And remember one important thing in burial.
Money doesn't solve everything, just be humble till you put him inside ground. Sorry for your loss.

I understand you very well, I called my aunt whom I'm close to and she told them.
Hoping for their response now.
It's just my mum that I have to explain to since she isn't a Nigerian, I understand these traditions a little but I'm just angered by their inability to even care somehow since all these while.

Re: How Do I Go About My Father's Burial Arrangements? by Nobody: 10:21am On Oct 04, 2022

Isn't it your mother's responsibility to bury her husband?

Cooolme:
So my dad has been sick for couple of years now and just died sadly.
I'm the first son and I've decided to inquire about how burial arrangements are made and also sponsor it solely because his family cut us off, although they tried but later abandoned him. My Mom have decided not to have anything to do with them ever since and also wish to bury him here at our place of residence not in the village.
Please I need you inputs, thanks.

Re: How Do I Go About My Father's Burial Arrangements? by Templee333(m): 10:25am On Oct 04, 2022

Craig24:
Congratulations, you've read it once again.

It is said that when a dog decides to die it refuses to heed to the words of its owner.

It is also said that the length of a giraffe's neck doesn't guarantee it the privilege to see into the future.

i'm neither a dog nor a giraffe.

1 Like

Re: How Do I Go About My Father's Burial Arrangements? by Cooolme(op): 11:13am On Oct 04, 2022

Samantha123:
Isn't it your mother's responsibility to bury her husband?

Well, it's more of my responsibility too that's why I brought this post up.

Re: How Do I Go About My Father's Burial Arrangements? by Nigga44: 2:18pm On Oct 04, 2022

Re: How Do I Go About My Father's Burial Arrangements? by Nobody: 2:49pm On Oct 04, 2022

But you mustn't carry the responsibility alone.

Cooolme:
Well, it's more of my responsibility too that's why I brought this post up.

1 2 Reply

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