₦airaland Forum

MufasaLion:
No, he's not immature. Your definition of immaturity is wrong and it shows you are shallow. There are more better ways to address an adult male, irrespective of the relationship (son/daughter/nieces etc) between you both.

Most of y'all were raised by parents that were/are bad at parenting!

BigYash:
She is not.. The son probably loves the girl more. Meanwhile the babe is supposed to love op more.. And if this is the case,it will ruin him... That is what I think mama is seeing.. My advice is for op to calm down,while he check and balance the whole situation.. No girl loves a man.. She is just playing the normal game,they all play.. Op thinks its love..

zed7:
Your mum is not scolding you because you're too young but because she knows her son is immature.

You finished service last year and your priority is a woman? The money you think you're making now is nothing when a family comes. Consolidate and build yourself up properly.

Women love marriage and grandkids but your mum knows her son is far from mature enough to marry. Be wise son, listen to mum.

As for rescuing the family from poverty, don't let that bother you. Family problems nor dey finish. Increase your income before thinking of a woman. Your family will be fine with or without you.

zed7:
Shut up. I don't want to be quoted by boys.

Raalsalghul:
Op, what's the financial status of your family? A humble one?

While I understand the need for men to sometimes put women aside and get their lives on track, the reason your mom is giving for it sounds selfish.

Sounds like you're the first born and she wants you to settle your junior siblings first.




Thought as much.

Op, don't let them guilt trip you with that first born crap.

Do what you can for your family, at your convenience and pace cos peradventure heavens forbid you're no longer there they would still survive one way or the other.

Don't sacrifice your progress on the altar of "I want to settle my family".

May I also ask how old are your junior siblings? Early/Mid 20s? They should be able to handle stuffs by now without looking up to brother.

When people are told to cap the number of children they give birth to, they'll give all sorts of religious and sentimental excuses.

I also hope you learn from this Op and procreate responsibly so you won't put more pressure on your first born like your ma is doing to you now.

victooman:
so is it when l ignore all relationship that is when l will make money? ,,guy l am 29yrs,, l feed myself pay my bills and dont depends on anyone for a dime,, l should put my life on hold because l want to solve family problems,, the girl in question is even doing well for herself an intelligent and a hard working woman that will push me to my best,, l don't know why my mum is misunderstanding this things,, even at 50yrs guy family problems wont finish

JOACHINpedro:
Oga nobody is telling you to ditch a good girl.

MufasaLion:
Damn! How do y'all think?

Nowhere in the write-up shows who loves who more. Also, if he loves her more, it's nobody's business. So, talk something more reasonable.

The woman saw a picture of her adult son of almost 30-year-old with a woman and she was gaslighted all because he felt jealous, entitled and illogical. She thought the lady is a godldigger, albeit there's no even any gold to dig! A lady that splited the bill just to make sure they could afford the meal without it affecting the guy's pocket.

Yes, they are poor or low-class but that isn't enough reason to to against your adult son on having a relationship. He's doing his best in helping them financially and he's not obligated to! Why didn't the woman have kids she could cater for instead of breeding like rodents?

victooman:
then what exactly is ur comment insunating

BigYash:
Whatever! Months to come op will understand what his mom is saying right now.. You must be a lady to be talking this way..

Ballzproblem2:
is not that she doesn't want you to have a girlfriend ,is just she wants you to get your priorities right, being financially stable, however, you can keep the relationship on a low ,win win situation on both sides

victooman:
Thanks bro,, but l am a man , l feed my self and take care of my responsibilities, l dont know why l should be hiding my relationship like a teenager,, making 120k a month is the salary prayer of most married men,, is just that l felt my mother just have this unrealistic Nollywood expectations that l must build rome and make everyone rich before settling down,, l honestly dont want to lose this my girlfriend , l am more focus and saves money a lot with her,, if my girl goes and l keep giving attention to many of this random girls chasing me around l will even spend more.

BigYash:
Your mom is seeing what love has blinded your eyes from seeing in the said girl. That's how love works. Once the love clear your eyes now,you will receive sense.. You will see what mama saw that you never saw,while in love.. And you will forever be grateful to mom.. Help me tell your mom,that I said God will bless her. She will live long in good health and happiness. Na better mama you get op..

victooman:
love blinded nothing brother,, if not for the economy hardship of this country a man of 29yrs should have a wife and children, l am paying all my bills and will definitely take care of a woman,, just that l haven't make the cash , to carter for a whole family,, l will always support no matter what but l dont have to make all the money in the world before having a girlfriend.

BigYash:
I am not even talking about the financial aspect. Money alone can't make marriage work.. I'm thinking maybe mama is seeing something else,but using this aspect to discourage you. So that,you will let go of what might be problem to you later. Which ever way sha,just ensure you are making the right decision. Don't rush it..

MufasaLion:
Damn! How do y'all think?

Nowhere in the write-up shows who loves who more. Also, if he loves her more, it's nobody's business. So, talk something more reasonable.

The woman saw a picture of her adult son of almost 30-year-old with a woman and she was gaslighted all because he felt jealous, entitled and illogical. She thought the lady is a godldigger, albeit there's no even any gold to dig! A lady that splited the bill just to make sure they could afford the meal without it affecting the guy's pocket.

Yes, they are poor or low-class but that isn't enough reason to to against your adult son on having a relationship. He's doing his best in helping them financially and he's not obligated to! Why didn't the woman have kids she could cater for instead of breeding like rodents?

victooman:
l understand you,, my mother haven't met her bro,, maybe l am in love with her ,, but nobody who meet my girl will not commend her,, right from the time of Nysc,, that girl is my backbone here in Abuja.

victooman:
so l finish my Nysc service last year,,met the girl of my dream during the service year, we both live in Abuja although separately because she stays with her sister, we both have a business separately we are managing that gives us a minimum of 4-5k on daily basis,, l have told my mother about my girlfriend and try to make her understand how much l love this girl ,
on Sunday we went to chicken republic eat something of 5k which my girlfriend even contributed 2k to it, she posted the picture on Facebook and tag me, my younger brother saw it and show my mother ,, yesterday my mother called me and was talking to me like toddler,,
she claim that any young man who want to succeed should not put a woman first,that l should make money and attend to family problem first before focusing on a woman,,l ask her: is a man of 29yrs too small to have a girlfriend? l told her :" l barely finish Nysc service last year,, instead of sitting down doing nothing ,l have started a business and l am sending small small money to u and my siblings, if l ditch having any girlfriend at 29yrs and focus on family problems that means l wont get married, and l also inform her that am not living with my girlfriend as she is insunating that girl takes care of 90 percent of her problems,, those were the answers l gave when she cut off the call,, please nairalanders how can l handle my mother and still maintain my relationship.

victooman:
so l finish my Nysc service last year,,met the girl of my dream during the service year, we both live in Abuja although separately because she stays with her sister, we both have a business separately we are managing that gives us a minimum of 4-5k on daily basis,, l have told my mother about my girlfriend and try to make her understand how much l love this girl ,
on Sunday we went to chicken republic eat something of 5k which my girlfriend even contributed 2k to it, she posted the picture on Facebook and tag me, my younger brother saw it and show my mother ,, yesterday my mother called me and was talking to me like toddler,,
she claim that any young man who want to succeed should not put a woman first,that l should make money and attend to family problem first before focusing on a woman,,l ask her: is a man of 29yrs too small to have a girlfriend? l told her :" l barely finish Nysc service last year,, instead of sitting down doing nothing ,l have started a business and l am sending small small money to u and my siblings, if l ditch having any girlfriend at 29yrs and focus on family problems that means l wont get married, and l also inform her that am not living with my girlfriend as she is insunating that girl takes care of 90 percent of her problems,, those were the answers l gave when she cut off the call,, please nairalanders how can l handle my mother and still maintain my relationship.

Raalsalghul:
God will provide and perhaps one of them might become rich and deliver the family from poverty so it's better she breeds more: the higher the number of kids, the higher the chances.

Bunch of dunces!

Lauraobd1:
I think I'm in same shoe here.my mom even confronted my gf to halt anything with me.reason..shes older than me

Mcslize:
Follow your heart. If the lady is good, don't let your mother be an issue. Except if the girl is not good for you, only then you can listen to your mum.

It's always good to at least have someone on time, so that you won't get caught up. At 29, you ain't a baby any more. You should be thinking of starting a family.

The only thorn on the back issue is finding a good girl these days. Most have taken into runs and hookup in this era, so it's quite hard to find a really good lady.

But, if you find any homely and cool headed girl who isn't into hookup and the rest and independent, go ahead with your plan to seal it if you have the means.

Besides, do you know that there are lots of unbelievable facts about sex you still don't know till now?

Check out these shocking psychological facts about sex that no one will tell you even if you point a gun at them.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8nF98Su71EM

DaddyCK:
How can yor mother be 29yer old....bro r u OK?(no oofencse)

Raalsalghul:
The mom is being selfish with her reasons.

Op didn't ask her to give birth to battalions so why is she pressuring the young lad?

She should bear the consequences of her actions together with her husband.

victooman:
Bro if kpekus is my problem l wont focus on one girlfriend, she is a graduate and l am a graduate,, nobody is a liability to anybody,, if l ditch relationship at 29yrs and focus on family problems walahi l wont even progress myself,,this is just the major disadvantages of coming from a poor family.

Ballzproblem2:
is not that she doesn't want you to have a girlfriend ,is just she wants you to get your priorities right, being financially stable, however, you can keep the relationship on a low ,win win situation on both sides

victooman:
so l finish my Nysc service last year,,met the girl of my dream during the service year, we both live in Abuja although separately because she stays with her sister, we both have a business separately we are managing that gives us a minimum of 4-5k on daily basis,, l have told my mother about my girlfriend and try to make her understand how much l love this girl ,
on Sunday we went to chicken republic eat something of 5k which my girlfriend even contributed 2k to it, she posted the picture on Facebook and tag me, my younger brother saw it and show my mother ,, yesterday my mother called me and was talking to me like toddler,,
she claim that any young man who want to succeed should not put a woman first,that l should make money and attend to family problem first before focusing on a woman,,l ask her: is a man of 29yrs too small to have a girlfriend? l told her :" l barely finish Nysc service last year,, instead of sitting down doing nothing ,l have started a business and l am sending small small money to u and my siblings, if l ditch having any girlfriend at 29yrs and focus on family problems that means l wont get married, and l also inform her that am not living with my girlfriend as she is insunating that girl takes care of 90 percent of her problems,, those were the answers l gave when she cut off the call,, please nairalanders how can l handle my mother and still maintain my relationship.