willbayo:
I no fit talk am

Boogyman557:
Holly Gram Make I CAPRISUN my OWN MATTERS..


Na 2013 E happen..


As I de COME back from were I go buy WEED, NaSo police see me.. Dem tell me to stop der, Dem ask me waiting de pocket, I tell Dem nothing.. NaSo Dem search me come see plenty WEED wey Dem don ROLL down for my pocket.. Dem GRAB my belt and carry me de JAZZ in police station.. dat my trouser get pocket 4 d down side and na RAW WEED full der.. NaSo I use style remove d RAW WEED come put d WEED inside my YANNSH.. bcus I no FIT stay a day inside sell without WEED ooo..


Dem put me inside SELL.. in d evening NaSo I CHUK hand inside my YANNSH and bring out plenty RAW WEED.. ALL de senior MEN inside SELL begin de hail ME.. I share RAW WEED 4 all of Dem, EVERYBODY come HIGH INTOTO... Dem Even give me name (WEED father) and Dem come give me rank 4 inside SELL..


D NEXT morning my uncle come bail me...


NaSo d matterz take go ooo!


LITE UP my WEED in peace


WTF MAN!

Boogyman557:
Holly Gram Make I CAPRISUN my OWN MATTERS..


Na 2013 E happen..


As I de COME back from were I go buy WEED, NaSo police see me.. Dem tell me to stop der, Dem ask me waiting de pocket, I tell Dem nothing.. NaSo Dem search me come see plenty WEED wey Dem don ROLL down for my pocket.. Dem GRAB my belt and carry me de JAZZ in police station.. dat my trouser get pocket 4 d down side and na RAW WEED full der.. NaSo I use style remove d RAW WEED come put d WEED inside my YANNSH.. bcus I no FIT stay a day inside sell without WEED ooo..


Dem put me inside SELL.. in d evening NaSo I CHUK hand inside my YANNSH and bring out plenty RAW WEED.. ALL de senior MEN inside SELL begin de hail ME.. I share RAW WEED 4 all of Dem, EVERYBODY come HIGH INTOTO... Dem Even give me name (WEED father) and Dem come give me rank 4 inside SELL..


D NEXT morning my uncle come bail me...


NaSo d matterz take go ooo!


LITE UP my WEED in peace


WTF MAN!

Exmilitant:
There was shortages of petrol in PH around 2001 and so the queues for petrol was long and uncoordinated in every filling station.

My niggars and I usually use these as opportunity to make cash by coordinating cars and trucks in filling stations.

There was this filling station at first artillery ( from Eleme Junction) we usually work in in times like this, so I was directing vehicles that had tipped us to move away from the lines and take a shorter route to the petrol pump when one black tinted Jeep that had not tipped us entered the space I had created for those who had paid. I was furious and started yelling and walking violently towards the car when, I got closer the driver window slide down and the driver, a lady smiled and said, "how many taps of dope do you have in your pocket"? I was shocked I looked around me and then realized that the filling station was exactly opposite NDLEA office!!

I had to smile and said, "madam I no dey smoke o." Immediately she nodded and the doors of the vehicle started opening. Vam! Yours truly disappeared! Dem pursue, Na so we do temple run round Artillery till I enter Catholic Church, dem still dey chase Na so I enter Reverend Father house, enter kitchen come follow him back fence jump come land for one empty fenced compound.

Dem catch those my friends sha!

black9:



Naso me and 'mortal man' take enter jungle go buy smoke, na so we decide patronize skarma that evening as per say e don tey wey we chop him market. As per evening we decide siddon to collect small breeze join for jungle. I on my bt speaker begin dey jam wknd starboy.

E no tey we see officers dey stroll around at a distance but we reason say na dere off duty friend (Afuye) wey dey follow us chill dere dem find come but less than a minute later we see hand point come our location, Immediately I put d smoke for my breast pocket form gentleman, mortal man begin dey fidget like Adam after eating the apple.

Police approach us, ask us to 'search yourself'. Mortal man just immediately breakdown dey apologize. Case closed. Police put hand for my pocket, comot smoke begin dey ask 'what is dis', I reply 'medication for my eyes, I'm a journalist with marijuana prescriptions'. Dem ask 'shey your friend sef get marijuana prescription' pointing at mortal man wey don dey lament 'oh damn, and dem warn me not to dey waka with dis guy'(referencing me).

Dem collect my phone and speaker, March us go dem jalopy. Eventually dem drive us round Ifako Ijaiye threatening to lock us up with bad boys for Cell. I kept asking for my phone 'to make one call' but dem just dey hala say 'you no sabi d gravity of wetin you do sha'

Laslas dem drive us from Shadiga (Obawole) to go raid another jungle along Agric road (Abuleegba) where dem see correct elements, na dere dem free us say 'man widout money no dey smoke, cancer fit catch am'.
I reply say 'na d country cause am' we all laughed, then I got my palasa android back. I begin folo dere moto for my speaker and got a chance to show dem a pic taken just weeks earlier with their superior during a field assignment. It was an hilarious experience.

GOD be praised Holy Spirit has taken over my life

Jakumo:
My own weed wahala start one day when I go bush to find meat kill for night. Me witi my hunta dog Bingo dey follow wakka for night go where Baba Modina plant corn near one bush so. Na grasscutter when dey chop dat corn for night, na him I say make I find go, but na anoda ting I mistake go jam for bush dat night.

Me witi Bingo tanda one place dey listen how grasscutter dey chop dat corn, kra-kra-kra-kra. I off my light dey listen until I hear leg of one BIIIIG grasscutter when chop come near for where me and Bingo dey. After when I don sure say the grasscutter don chop forget himsef, I take style on my light and den carry my shaka-gbula cap gun up, come give am one hand GBOOOOOOYAAAaaa!

Smoke when commot for my gun plenty sotay I nor even fiti take eye see weda I don kill meat, or weda di meat don pick race. One time, Bingo wake up begin dey run follow the grasscutter juwaaaa, juwaaaa, juwaaaa, for inside bush. Me sef I begin dey follow Bingo witi my cutlass, say make I take am nack di grasscutter for head if I fiti cash am.

We run sotay I come tire. I say make I sit down and rest make man pikin no go die because of too mush run inside bush. Before one minute I just hear somebody shout for inside bush say "HANDS UP, Dis is NDLEA!". As dem point light for my eye, I come see say na for inside BIIIG igbo cannabis farm I mistake come go siddon to rest, for the VERY night when NDLEA dem come lay ambush for to cash the owner when dem no see am cash for afternoon time.

Na so me and Bingo pick race, begin dey run like teef for inside bush, gbudu gbudu gbudu gbudu. NDLEA dem too begin dey pursue me, dey fire gun, GBOSAAAA ! GBOSAAA ! GBOSAA!. Anyway, God so kind, me and Bingo manage escape dat night, and I nor even go back to find my cutlass and shakagbula cap gun when I throway inside bush for where I dey run like teef.

brain54:

You and bingo na who first reach house?

Jakumo:


Dat day get as e be o my brodda. Na Bingo first me reach house, but he come run pass am go enter one thick bush for near river. Na for inside that bush me and him hide complete 3 days, until we sure say NDLEA never sabi where my house dey.

Oga Marwa we hail o. Those ya boys dem sabi run pass Igala sef. Even as dat ona bullet scatter di bottle of fresh palmie when dey my hunter bag, I no fess and I no comprain because all ting dey Papa God hand.

If to say no be all my load when I carry throway as I dey run dat night witi auxiliary gear, I for still dey prison till today, because of where dem meet me dat night. Papa God dey wonderful, as He dey save man pikin sometime, I am telling you like dis.

Boogyman557:
Holly Gram Make I CAPRISUN my OWN MATTERS..


Na 2013 E happen..


As I de COME back from were I go buy WEED, NaSo police see me.. Dem tell me to stop der, Dem ask me waiting de pocket, I tell Dem nothing.. NaSo Dem search me come see plenty WEED wey Dem don ROLL down for my pocket.. Dem GRAB my belt and carry me de JAZZ in police station.. dat my trouser get pocket 4 d down side and na RAW WEED full der.. NaSo I use style remove d RAW WEED come put d WEED inside my YANNSH.. bcus I no FIT stay a day inside sell without WEED ooo..


Dem put me inside SELL.. in d evening NaSo I CHUK hand inside my YANNSH and bring out plenty RAW WEED.. ALL de senior MEN inside SELL begin de hail ME.. I share RAW WEED 4 all of Dem, EVERYBODY come HIGH INTOTO... Dem Even give me name (WEED father) and Dem come give me rank 4 inside SELL..


D NEXT morning my uncle come bail me...


NaSo d matterz take go ooo!


LITE UP my WEED in peace


WTF MAN!

Jakumo:


Nna Mortal Man disappoint dat day no be small ting. Why e be say Mortal Man just begin dey apologize when he for at least try to run?

Mortal man na pussy butty

Den after, Mortal Man come put san-san for ya garri as he dey complain say him for know make him no follow you dey wakka.

He later begin dey form good friend

Oh, I just feel sadness when I read ya 'tory how as Mortal Man just dey collect fail dat day, without shame. A ah, Mortal Man. Why na?

Then began to rewrite the narrative say him display confidence


Anyway, when I tink am sotay, I come see say you sef don turn to customer for NDLEA dem sotay dem fiti give you rope witi high rank of honor for Lagos cannabis matta concern, I am telling you like dis.
GOD only be praised I am repented

Houseofglam7:

illicit:


I don stop to dey take Ganja sha

illicit:


WTF