₦airaland Forum

Afodot0022:
Ok thanks. Now that the kids are with me, what can i do cos she uses that as an advantage to come to my place and am not cool with this fact. She wanted to even spend the weekend with us but i object cos i dont want what will make me loose guard and become vulnerable again to her manipulative antics

then let her have custody of the kids while you send her money for upkeep for the kids. You can go visiting too. She has to see her kids too

Ok.

Beremx:
then let her have custody of the kids while you send her money for upkeep for the kids. You can go visiting too. She has to see her kids too

Thanks for this.

Justbehave:
Bros pls take custody of your kids. You are even lucky to have a mother and a sister helping you out. In my own case I don't. So I employed two nannies because I'm with my three kids though all boys. One works from 8 am to 5pm while the other starts from 5pm to 8am.Their mums don't dare visit them. No time for nonsense.

Afodot0022:
Yes i understand you better, she have the higher chances taken custody because of their age and also female. Just dont want anything that will make me relate with her which i know its impossible cos of the kids. Seeing her brings back the hurt in me and reason am trying to avoid her. She came yesterday to see them kids and honestly i wasnt happy seeing her cos it triggers what she did to me and how she hurt me. I just dont want to set an eye on her for now so i can be fine and heal and back emotionally. Me seeing her drains me emotionally. Honestly divorce is not easy and has its own issues. Atimes itss even worst than the marriage itself.

Why don't you just kill her, so you can go to jail and heal properly.... ODE

Afodot0022:
Thanks for this.

Ololololo buga ooo
Do you have the balls? cry cry baby..
Have you ever seen jusbehave thread whinnying and crying over his misfortune? because he is a real man...not a bend down select sellout like you... Your gender hatred will be the end of you... mark it down..

Justbehave:
Bros pls take custody of your kids. You are even lucky to have a mother and a sister helping you out. In my own case I don't. So I employed two nannies because I'm with my three kids though all boys. One works from 8 am to 5pm while the other starts from 5pm to 8am.Their mums don't dare visit them. No time for nonsense.

Your baby mamas are that bad?Or you're just intimidating them?

Why do most divorces men hardly get custody of the kids to care for them. It always ends with then pawing the kids off to one aunt or grandma to do the raising for them. I thought women bring nothing to the table. Yet small small child raising is too difficult

LotaTee:
Your baby mamas are that bad?Or you're just intimidating them?

You can put it anyhow you want to but the facts still remain that they won't near my kids.

Well its obvious that kids are supposed to be in custody of their mom except otherwise cos the mother can care better than the father and with the busy schedule of the father, he can hardly have time to bring them up which will affect them. Why take custody as a man when the kids are still young and also their mom is still alive. Doesn't make sense to me cos no matter how u dont want the kids to be close to their mom, when they grow up, they will make that decision and their is nothing u can do about it.. So i think its always beneficial for them to stay with their mom. They have been with me since January taking care of them and its not easy as a man cos we are not wired or gifted in such care roles. Am thinking of takibg them back to their mom after they have finish this term in school so i can focus and move on as a man. My thought though

Afodot0022:
Well its obvious that kids are supposed to be in custody of their mom except otherwise cos the mother can care better than the father and with the busy schedule of the father, he can hardly have time to bring them up which will affect them. Why take custody as a man when the kids are still young and also their mom is still alive. Doesn't make sense to me cos no matter how u dont want the kids to be close to their mom, when they grow up, they will make that decision and their is nothing u can do about it.. So i think its always beneficial for them to stay with their mom. They have been with me since January taking care of them and its not easy as a man cos we are not wired or gifted in such care roles. Am thinking of takibg them back to their mom after they have finish this term in school so i can focus and move on as a man. My thought though

Every day --one chronicle of afodot's lamentations...
Ogbeni gbe ejo lo and be a man...

Justbehave:
You can put it anyhow you want to but the facts still remain that they won't near my kids.

I think the problem is you, seeing as you have children from multiple women, none of which you're married to.

Afodot0022:
Thanks for this piece of advice. Really appreciate. Thank God i have a job and can take care of them with the help of my mom. My wife has proven she is not worth it and as u said, she might poison there mind towards me. Thanks once again.

Wow.... after raising you finish, you go come burden her with raising your children as well? Some of you only value your mothers by mouth only. She is no more than a glorified servant to you, it seems.

LotaTee:
I think the problem is you, seeing as you have children from multiple women, none of which you're married to.

Whatever. My kids are more important to me. The baby mamas can all go to hell for all I care.

cococandy:
Why do most divorces men hardly get custody of the kids to care for them. It always ends with then pawing the kids off to one aunt or grandma to do the raising for them. I thought women bring nothing to the table. Yet small small child raising is too difficult

That is what OP seems to be planning here while trying to make us believe he loves his kids more than his wife. They are nothing more than marital property for him to keep away from his wife.

Afodot0022:
■ Well its obvious that kids are supposed to be in custody of their mom except otherwise cos the mother can care better than the father and with the busy schedule of the father, he can hardly have time to bring them up which will affect them.
■ Why take custody as a man when the kids are still young and also their mom is still alive. Doesn't make sense to me cos no matter how u dont want the kids to be close to their mom, when they grow up, they will make that decision and their is nothing u can do about it.. So i think its always beneficial for them to stay with their mom. They have been with me since January taking care of them and its not easy as a man cos we are not wired or gifted in such care roles. Am thinking of takibg them back to their mom after they have finish this term in school so i can focus and move on as a man. My thought though

1. Haven't you deceived yourself enough with your many threads regarding these things?

2. So, now you have switched from playing "loving dad" to considerable father abi?

Chidi2022:
Why don't you just kill her, so you can go to jail and heal properly.... ODE

Ode

Justbehave:
Whatever. My kids are more important to me. The baby mamas can all go to hell for all I care.

You have got some real and hard dialogue to do when the kids grow up

xavuv:
You have got some real and hard dialogue to do when the kids grow up

When we get to the bridge,we will device a means. Let them grow up first.

Pls guys i need more inputs to navigate through my situation. Its already draining me physically and mentally.

Afodot0022:
Pls guys i need more inputs to navigate through my situation. Its already draining me physically and mentally.

You need a time out.
Go for a vacation or smth. Feel self love before you breakdown

Afodot0022:
Top of the day to you naira landers,

I know some of you will criticize me here for always bringing my marital issues here.

Well i believe we got lots of married responsible people here that might have gone through what i am facing through and may have one or two advice for me on how to navigate through my issues.

Some of you are unaware of my stories, i will urge you to read through my stories under my profile name and have better understanding about how it unfolded.

Now i am still struggling emotionally base on the problem am having with my wife, the disloyal, cheating and dishonesty from her ever since she got the job and get an accommodation in the barrack.

She has been a complete different person entirely and still surprise how she turned to be who she is now. well i have decided to divorce her and sent her away because she had caused me enough pains emotionally which am yet to heal from, my peace of mind and mental health is at stake and dont want to run mad because of a woman. I dont think i deserve that. .

My advice to single men and women planning to settle down soon should be very careful with the person they want to marry and know the person very well cos people do change alot when circumstances struck.

That man or woman you are so in love with now might turn out to be a beast when you later end up getting married. Marriage is a very difficult journey.

Now i and my wife are separated living apart but my two daughters are still leaving with me and with the help of my aged mom and sister, they are taking care of them and doing well.

Now am kinda confuse whether i should let the kids go stay with their mother or they should stay with me. Though she is not dragging custody with me but I realize the kids staying with me for now gives me that emotional strength and doesn't make me feel lonely, but if i take them to their mom, i might start missing them and loneliness and depression may strike being that i will be living alone.

I just want to get advice from divorced or separated men or women and even married and single here how they handle the custody part of their kids when their marriage ended, is it easy as a man to raise two girls age 5 and 6yrs and what are the issues relating to these.

As i said, i have a mom and aunt that can look after them very well and all i have to do is provide for them all they will be needing physically and financially, but i just what to be sure if am taking the right decision and wont regret taking their full custody.

pls anyone with useful advice should drop here cos am in a dilemma right now and want to get solution to my issues.

Pls sorry for the typo errors, am writing this with emotions scattered.

you are a foolish man, is it what is good for you that matters or what is best for your children? ode!!! i even thought you were going to talk about how useless the mother is but it is your loneliness you are worried about? no wonder your marraige crashed, no wonder your wife cheated or left you, the fact that it is your loneliness that worries you says a lot that you are not a man!!!

take it from a fellow man, you are an irresponsible father!!!

Irresponsible men everywhere....

A failed marriage, what message are you passing to your childrens, I just pity your childrens neh...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Huqs3OL1ZO4

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only if the mother is rresponsible.

Your primary responsibilities as a man is first to your kids.

Your wife is she decides not to be your responsibility by respecting you and you fulfilling your obligation to her as a husband then you can't help it.

Do your best as a father to stand for your kids and be a father figure to them. It's better they be with you than their mother.

If what you said about your wife is true, then it will be a disaster to leave the kids with her cos with her new found love, she might likely not be there for them because of her fantasy pursuit.
"A man who can't take care of his family is never a real man"

PLEASE HOLD ON TO THOSE KIDS!
Especially when you said she is promiscuous. She will infect the kids with all her bad behavior.
However, note that after a while , she willl come back for those kids , especially after you have raised them to be teenagers. She left them for you to do the hard work of raising a toddler.
Try your best to impart as much morals in them as possible. Young girls will likely go with their mum when that time comes. But the foundation you give them now & your prayers will prevent their mum from negatively influencing them.
It is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for a man to get custody, especially in Nigeria.
Marriage, divorce and custody is usually rigged against the man. Unless you find a reasonable judge.

Afodot0022:
Top of the day to you naira landers,

I know some of you will criticize me here for always bringing my marital issues here.

Well i believe we got lots of married responsible people here that might have gone through what i am facing through and may have one or two advice for me on how to navigate through my issues.

Some of you are unaware of my stories, i will urge you to read through my stories under my profile name and have better understanding about how it unfolded.

Now i am still struggling emotionally base on the problem am having with my wife, the disloyal, cheating and dishonesty from her ever since she got the job and get an accommodation in the barrack.

She has been a complete different person entirely and still surprise how she turned to be who she is now. well i have decided to divorce her and sent her away because she had caused me enough pains emotionally which am yet to heal from, my peace of mind and mental health is at stake and dont want to run mad because of a woman. I dont think i deserve that. .

My advice to single men and women planning to settle down soon should be very careful with the person they want to marry and know the person very well cos people do change alot when circumstances struck.

That man or woman you are so in love with now might turn out to be a beast when you later end up getting married. Marriage is a very difficult journey.

Now i and my wife are separated living apart but my two daughters are still leaving with me and with the help of my aged mom and sister, they are taking care of them and doing well.

Now am kinda confuse whether i should let the kids go stay with their mother or they should stay with me. Though she is not dragging custody with me but I realize the kids staying with me for now gives me that emotional strength and doesn't make me feel lonely, but if i take them to their mom, i might start missing them and loneliness and depression may strike being that i will be living alone.

I just want to get advice from divorced or separated men or women and even married and single here how they handle the custody part of their kids when their marriage ended, is it easy as a man to raise two girls age 5 and 6yrs and what are the issues relating to these.

As i said, i have a mom and aunt that can look after them very well and all i have to do is provide for them all they will be needing physically and financially, but i just what to be sure if am taking the right decision and wont regret taking their full custody.

pls anyone with useful advice should drop here cos am in a dilemma right now and want to get solution to my issues.

Pls sorry for the typo errors, am writing this with emotions scattered.

Wise word from a barrack boy. If your wife join militery she will hardly be loyal. She go Bleep oga. She go Bleep her mate. No or only 10% loyal militery women. So if nah militery omoh carry them now leave that womam. Because does kids go start Bleep early. God come purnish you/bless you with girls. Your wife men go Bleep your daughters too.. i wish you well oh.. but as a once barrack pikin. Carry your kids

Afodot0022:
Top of the day to you naira landers,

I know some of you will criticize me here for always bringing my marital issues here.

Well i believe we got lots of married responsible people here that might have gone through what i am facing through and may have one or two advice for me on how to navigate through my issues.

Some of you are unaware of my stories, i will urge you to read through my stories under my profile name and have better understanding about how it unfolded.

Now i am still struggling emotionally base on the problem am having with my wife, the disloyal, cheating and dishonesty from her ever since she got the job and get an accommodation in the barrack.

She has been a complete different person entirely and still surprise how she turned to be who she is now. well i have decided to divorce her and sent her away because she had caused me enough pains emotionally which am yet to heal from, my peace of mind and mental health is at stake and dont want to run mad because of a woman. I dont think i deserve that. .

My advice to single men and women planning to settle down soon should be very careful with the person they want to marry and know the person very well cos people do change alot when circumstances struck.

That man or woman you are so in love with now might turn out to be a beast when you later end up getting married. Marriage is a very difficult journey.

Now i and my wife are separated living apart but my two daughters are still leaving with me and with the help of my aged mom and sister, they are taking care of them and doing well.

Now am kinda confuse whether i should let the kids go stay with their mother or they should stay with me. Though she is not dragging custody with me but I realize the kids staying with me for now gives me that emotional strength and doesn't make me feel lonely, but if i take them to their mom, i might start missing them and loneliness and depression may strike being that i will be living alone.

I just want to get advice from divorced or separated men or women and even married and single here how they handle the custody part of their kids when their marriage ended, is it easy as a man to raise two girls age 5 and 6yrs and what are the issues relating to these.

As i said, i have a mom and aunt that can look after them very well and all i have to do is provide for them all they will be needing physically and financially, but i just what to be sure if am taking the right decision and wont regret taking their full custody.

pls anyone with useful advice should drop here cos am in a dilemma right now and want to get solution to my issues.

Pls sorry for the typo errors, am writing this with emotions scattered.

If their mother is not interested in their custody omo thank God o! Infact sharpally go file for it now before she changes her mind. Custody matter na bitch!

In as much as she is not disturbing you about custody issue, just leave her. But note that if you have not divorced her officially, she is still your wife. From the look of things, your wife doesn't want to part ways or divorce with you. She wants to explore and flex with her new lover. Bet me, when the chips are down, she will come begging to return back to you.

However, if divorce is your target, it is always the court that decides on custody. While the woman (in most cases) maintains custody of the child, the man (the visiting parent) provides child's support.

NOT THAT "SHE MIGHT POISON THEIR MIND", BRO SHE WILL DEFINITELY POISON THEIR MINDS. KEEP THE KIDS AWAY FROM A TOXIC WOMAN.

Afodot0022:
Thanks for this piece of advice. Really appreciate. Thank God i have a job and can take care of them with the help of my mom. My wife has proven she is not worth it and as u said, she might poison there mind towards me. Thanks once again.