Man Rejects His Wife-to-be Three Days Traditional Marriage - Romance (4)

Man Rejects His Wife-to-be Three Days Traditional Marriage - Romance (4) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum › Nairaland General › Romance › Man Rejects His Wife-to-be Three Days Traditional Marriage (45721 Views)

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Re: Man Rejects His Wife-to-be Three Days Traditional Marriage by Everbryte: 8:11pm On May 22, 2023

In some part of Akwa Ibom, the traditional marriage list is more or less a family "artifact" that is given to a groom who come to marry from the family. It is not cast on stone though. The bride's father will play along and allow such list to be given by default to the groom so as to be in sync with his kinsmen, the list is open for discussion (iterative). He can as well run it by himself & decide & curate his own list.

Usually, it is open to negotiation, in some families, The bride's father might advise that he tries his best to gratify the items on the list meant for the extended family, and such factors like groom's religion & life philosophy also play a big influence on what is acceptable by the intended couple & grooms family e.g. a born again Christian will not offer to give things like alcoholic beverages/spirits/tobacco etc & that can be respected.

There usually a back & forth engagement/discussion on refining the list. The bride father have the final say but if he happens to favor tradition it becomes a little bit of a problem.
Also if the bride's father is late & the brother(s) who run the show is seen to be 'naive' it can be an issue but if the brother is of age, wise,smart & courageous, it is to their advantage, he can decide to be radical & run one man show without recourse to the locals. Everything stops at his table to the advantage of the sister.

The bride can also appeal to the parents on what the husband is able/willing to give - it is all about her happiness

Anfield247:
Recently, let me say two to three weeks ago, my mom came back from church, discussing about an upcoming traditional marriage and wedding ceremony of the daughter of one of her church members with my dad. They were busy, I mean my mom and dad were busy talking about how the groom is a wealthy man and how the marriage will be glorious

I didn't even pick interest because I got better things to think about.
The bride-to-be is a graduate from akwa ibom, while the groom-to-be, on the other hand, is a pastor of one popular church in Nigeria, I won't mention the name of the church because not all their pastors are the same.

When they started the relationship, the pastor was rushing everything, he was like he can't wait to marry this pretty damsel.

According to the story, the parents of the both families have met each other, and some part of the traditional marriage has been done.
Everything was going according to plans, they even brought out a pre-wedding photo, which I myself saw on her Facebook. Here is how the marriage took a new twist,

Now, three days to the traditional marriage, the groom-to-be came out and said he's not getting married to the Bride anymore, that is no longer interested in the marriage.

When they asking why, he said it was because of the bride price list they gave to him.

Now, his church said there's no problem about that, that they will sponsor everything, the pastor still vehemently insisted that he is no longer interested in the marriage...

The parents of the girl said the marriage list is always open for negotiation, that it is not compulsory to pay everything at once, or even everything no the list to be paid,The young man still said no.

Now the marriage has been called off and the girl is heart-broken.

My Mom follow the mother of the bride-to-be to do the shopping.
They even invited so many people to the marriage ceremony but it unfortunately ended in the most unbelievable way...

What could possibly be the reason behind his decision?
Can a man go as far as performing some traditional marriage rite just to sleep with a girl?
Could it be because of the list?
Or can infantuation drive a man to do the unthinkable?
Could it be spiritual manipulation or just the matter of choice?

Re: Man Rejects His Wife-to-be Three Days Traditional Marriage by millionboi2: 8:13pm On May 22, 2023

Blitzking:
There are somethings I would see in a woman and I go forget the money spent thus far.i no go even reason am

is not about that,d fact that thy can also come ask the hand of your sister in marriage too should keep it balance.

Re: Man Rejects His Wife-to-be Three Days Traditional Marriage by shoboy9: 8:21pm On May 22, 2023

There's a lot of RUBBISH in our society concerning marriage and weddings. The guy has money. So you draw up a HUGE bride price for him. And he is a pastor. The bride to be is also part of it. Why put this burden on your husband and marriage? is it to love him or destroy him? If the bride had sense, she would reject the bride price. But instead, the solution was that he should pay small, small! I laugh in Swahili. Guy eye don open sha. He now understands the kind of love the girl and family have for him. Olosho are more straight forward.

Re: Man Rejects His Wife-to-be Three Days Traditional Marriage by DipsonGiggs: 8:33pm On May 22, 2023

It's actually the list; same thing nearly happened on my wedding day, if not for my Dad's intervention. I have actually bought those things I could afford but they were nearly putting up a fight, that it's not complete Just exactly how they did on the introduction day. The church offering to help is even the most embarrassing of it all. In-laws must not be greedy, it's a marriage and not that you selling off your daughter

Dshocker:
I can categorically and confidently tell you that the list wasn't the bone of contention.

Re: Man Rejects His Wife-to-be Three Days Traditional Marriage by bluefilm: 8:38pm On May 22, 2023

Anfield247:
Recently, let me say two to three weeks ago, my mom came back from church, discussing about an upcoming traditional marriage and wedding ceremony of the daughter of one of her church members with my dad. They were busy, I mean my mom and dad were busy talking about how the groom is a wealthy man and how the marriage will be glorious

I didn't even pick interest because I got better things to think about.
The bride-to-be is a graduate from akwa ibom, while the groom-to-be, on the other hand, is a pastor of one popular church in Nigeria, I won't mention the name of the church because not all their pastors are the same.

When they started the relationship, the pastor was rushing everything, he was like he can't wait to marry this pretty damsel.

According to the story, the parents of the both families have met each other, and some part of the traditional marriage has been done.
Everything was going according to plans, they even brought out a pre-wedding photo, which I myself saw on her Facebook. Here is how the marriage took a new twist,

Now, three days to the traditional marriage, the groom-to-be came out and said he's not getting married to the Bride anymore, that is no longer interested in the marriage.

When they asking why, he said it was because of the bride price list they gave to him.

Now, his church said there's no problem about that, that they will sponsor everything, the pastor still vehemently insisted that he is no longer interested in the marriage...

The parents of the girl said the marriage list is always open for negotiation, that it is not compulsory to pay everything at once, or even everything no the list to be paid,The young man still said no.

Now the marriage has been called off and the girl is heart-broken.

My Mom follow the mother of the bride-to-be to do the shopping.
They even invited so many people to the marriage ceremony but it unfortunately ended in the most unbelievable way...

What could possibly be the reason behind his decision?
Can a man go as far as performing some traditional marriage rite just to sleep with a girl?
Could it be because of the list?
Or can infantuation drive a man to do the unthinkable?
Could it be spiritual manipulation or just the matter of choice?

I believe the man might just be punishing her for something might have done or said to him in the past.

When some men plan their revenge for you, even the devil himsef go dey bow for dem.

Re: Man Rejects His Wife-to-be Three Days Traditional Marriage by Taiwo20(m): 8:42pm On May 22, 2023

There's something they are not telling us. We would know with time.

Re: Man Rejects His Wife-to-be Three Days Traditional Marriage by MOVIC6: 8:44pm On May 22, 2023

tuzle:
He must have seen something he didn't like. There is this girl I am dating now, when we started chatting she told me she was a virgin with her own mouth o and she has only had one bf before, I didnt ask her about the virgin part and it wasn't like I was looking for a virgin. Then after a month she changed mouth that she had sex with her former bf, and it was only with him she has ever had sex with(she made a statement then that it isn't possible for a bf and gf not to have sex together, so I questioned her about, after like 3 month again without asking she told me again that she lied then, that she had another bf she didn't tell me about and they so had sex multiple times, that it is guilty conscience that made her talk. Imagine I wanted to marry her and she keeps lying to me every time and this is someone who keeps telling me she isn't ready for sex even when I have never asked her about it.

May we never die cos of women

Re: Man Rejects His Wife-to-be Three Days Traditional Marriage by tuzle(m): 8:48pm On May 22, 2023

MOVIC6:
May we never die cos of women

I can't even die because of a woman

1 Like 1 Share

Re: Man Rejects His Wife-to-be Three Days Traditional Marriage by nattyGENT: 9:16pm On May 22, 2023

Na Akwa Ibom men dey marry Akwa Ibom ladies in peace without complain because the list is normal here.

1 Like

Re: Man Rejects His Wife-to-be Three Days Traditional Marriage by servicom101(m): 9:17pm On May 22, 2023

Righteousness2:
That is not ordinary! That his not ordinary!

If you don't contend the principalities and powers in your domain, they will war against you.
She needs to contend with powers and forces against her marriage in the place of prayer . Yokes need to be broken.

Advice her to visit the Lord's Chosen

What of Deeper Life?

Re: Man Rejects His Wife-to-be Three Days Traditional Marriage by Blitzking: 9:31pm On May 22, 2023

millionboi2:
is not about that,d fact that thy can also come ask the hand of your sister in marriage too should keep it balance.

Yeah we reap wat we sow

Re: Man Rejects His Wife-to-be Three Days Traditional Marriage by Livelystone01: 9:32pm On May 22, 2023

Rayban25:
The man know wetin him see...he discovered something fishy

What if someone sent him her nudes or sex tapes? Just saying...

Re: Man Rejects His Wife-to-be Three Days Traditional Marriage by Poleski: 10:00pm On May 22, 2023

Maybe he had sex with her and didn't like what he experienced. And he wouldn't tell his church he had sex

1 Like

Re: Man Rejects His Wife-to-be Three Days Traditional Marriage by Pat081: 10:09pm On May 22, 2023

pweeryambre:
He might not have seen anything. Some womanizers are like that. I know a banker friend of mine that did the same he even went as far as printing fake wedding cards and taking pre-wedding pictures just to bed the girl for some time. And still found one reason to leave her.
Taking narcissism to a whole new level

you better tell him to stop he is playing with his future he will just die

1 Like

Re: Man Rejects His Wife-to-be Three Days Traditional Marriage by Aurelius1(m): 10:58pm On May 22, 2023

pweeryambre:
He might not have seeen anything. Some womanizer are like that. I know a banker friend of mine that did thesame he even went as far as printing fake wedding card and taking pre wedding pictures just to bed the girl for some time. And still found one reason to leave her.
Taking narcissism to a whole new level

That banker friend of yours is an ass.hole. He may think he is being sharp while in actual fact he is plain wicked. Karma is real and when it begins to strike, e go begin dey run from one church to another.

2 Likes

Re: Man Rejects His Wife-to-be Three Days Traditional Marriage by MoneyMustBMade(m): 11:30pm On May 22, 2023

The idiot pastor used the opportunity to sex the guy...
Let him await for the wage, the reason he gave for calling off the wedding is not enough to put the young lady in that emotional trauma

I have a friend that did something similar to this, the girl bounce back better, the guy is seriously regretting everything till dat for missing he girl, the girl now she is married now and the current husband bought Mercedes E-350 2014 for her now

The guy is struggling with some financial problem now

Re: Man Rejects His Wife-to-be Three Days Traditional Marriage by kingslj: 11:32pm On May 22, 2023

tuzle:
He must have seen something he didn't like. There is this girl I am dating now, when we started chatting she told me she was a virgin with her own mouth o and she has only had one bf before, I didnt ask her about the virgin part and it wasn't like I was looking for a virgin. Then after a month she changed mouth that she had sex with her former bf, and it was only with him she has ever had sex with(she made a statement then that it isn't possible for a bf and gf not to have sex together, so I questioned her about, after like 3 month again without asking she told me again that she lied then, that she had another bf she didn't tell me about and they so had sex multiple times, that it is guilty conscience that made her talk. Imagine I wanted to marry her and she keeps lying to me every time and this is someone who keeps telling me she isn't ready for sex even when I have never asked her about it.

They will confuse you so tay ,another man child will be brought into your homw

Re: Man Rejects His Wife-to-be Three Days Traditional Marriage by naijapikin2(m): 11:53pm On May 22, 2023

Better to cancel it at this point than to get married and experience wahala

Re: Man Rejects His Wife-to-be Three Days Traditional Marriage by Menclothing: 12:30am On May 23, 2023

It might be infidelity

Re: Man Rejects His Wife-to-be Three Days Traditional Marriage by Aguiyimba(m): 12:53am On May 23, 2023

Focus on those better things you're thinking about

Re: Man Rejects His Wife-to-be Three Days Traditional Marriage by Nobody: 1:14am On May 23, 2023

Guy man done uncover some mysteries of the pastin the present grin

Re: Man Rejects His Wife-to-be Three Days Traditional Marriage by kaywhy09(m): 1:20am On May 23, 2023

If he say the reality, everywhere will scatter. Just accept his excuse and let everybody hold on to that.

Re: Man Rejects His Wife-to-be Three Days Traditional Marriage by forexprophet(m): 6:20am On May 23, 2023

She can sue him.....most Nigerian don't know that by law you can sue idiots who plays with people emotions

Anfield247:
Recently, let me say two to three weeks ago, my mom came back from church, discussing about an upcoming traditional marriage and wedding ceremony of the daughter of one of her church members with my dad. They were busy, I mean my mom and dad were busy talking about how the groom is a wealthy man and how the marriage will be glorious

I didn't even pick interest because I got better things to think about.
The bride-to-be is a graduate from akwa ibom, while the groom-to-be, on the other hand, is a pastor of one popular church in Nigeria, I won't mention the name of the church because not all their pastors are the same.

When they started the relationship, the pastor was rushing everything, he was like he can't wait to marry this pretty damsel.

According to the story, the parents of the both families have met each other, and some part of the traditional marriage has been done.
Everything was going according to plans, they even brought out a pre-wedding photo, which I myself saw on her Facebook. Here is how the marriage took a new twist,

Now, three days to the traditional marriage, the groom-to-be came out and said he's not getting married to the Bride anymore, that is no longer interested in the marriage.

When they asking why, he said it was because of the bride price list they gave to him.

Now, his church said there's no problem about that, that they will sponsor everything, the pastor still vehemently insisted that he is no longer interested in the marriage...

The parents of the girl said the marriage list is always open for negotiation, that it is not compulsory to pay everything at once, or even everything no the list to be paid,The young man still said no.

Now the marriage has been called off and the girl is heart-broken.

My Mom follow the mother of the bride-to-be to do the shopping.
They even invited so many people to the marriage ceremony but it unfortunately ended in the most unbelievable way...

What could possibly be the reason behind his decision?
Can a man go as far as performing some traditional marriage rite just to sleep with a girl?
Could it be because of the list?
Or can infantuation drive a man to do the unthinkable?
Could it be spiritual manipulation or just the matter of choice?

Re: Man Rejects His Wife-to-be Three Days Traditional Marriage by stonebil(m): 6:59am On May 23, 2023

Akwa ibom bride price is the main issue.

Re: Man Rejects His Wife-to-be Three Days Traditional Marriage by NickD(m): 7:02am On May 23, 2023

Anfield247:
Recently, let me say two to three weeks ago, my mom came back from church, discussing about an upcoming traditional marriage and wedding ceremony of the daughter of one of her church members with my dad. They were busy, I mean my mom and dad were busy talking about how the groom is a wealthy man and how the marriage will be glorious

I didn't even pick interest because I got better things to think about.
The bride-to-be is a graduate from akwa ibom, while the groom-to-be, on the other hand, is a pastor of one popular church in Nigeria, I won't mention the name of the church because not all their pastors are the same.

When they started the relationship, the pastor was rushing everything, he was like he can't wait to marry this pretty damsel.

According to the story, the parents of the both families have met each other, and some part of the traditional marriage has been done.
Everything was going according to plans, they even brought out a pre-wedding photo, which I myself saw on her Facebook. Here is how the marriage took a new twist,

Now, three days to the traditional marriage, the groom-to-be came out and said he's not getting married to the Bride anymore, that is no longer interested in the marriage.

When they asking why, he said it was because of the bride price list they gave to him.

Now, his church said there's no problem about that, that they will sponsor everything, the pastor still vehemently insisted that he is no longer interested in the marriage...

The parents of the girl said the marriage list is always open for negotiation, that it is not compulsory to pay everything at once, or even everything no the list to be paid,The young man still said no.

Now the marriage has been called off and the girl is heart-broken.

My Mom follow the mother of the bride-to-be to do the shopping.
They even invited so many people to the marriage ceremony but it unfortunately ended in the most unbelievable way...

What could possibly be the reason behind his decision?
Can a man go as far as performing some traditional marriage rite just to sleep with a girl?
Could it be because of the list?
Or can infantuation drive a man to do the unthinkable?
Could it be spiritual manipulation or just the matter of choice?

The man is a coward and most likely had a hidden agenda. His excuse holds no water not even after people tried to intercede on the list matter.

1 Like

Re: Man Rejects His Wife-to-be Three Days Traditional Marriage by henrixx(m): 7:06am On May 23, 2023

Aurelius1:
That banker friend of yours is an ass.hole. He may think he is being sharp while in actual fact he is plain wicked. Karma is real and when it begins to strike, e go begin dey run from one church to another.

KARMA IS NOT REAL

Re: Man Rejects His Wife-to-be Three Days Traditional Marriage by dododawa1: 7:15am On May 23, 2023

His EYE is covered before.

Re: Man Rejects His Wife-to-be Three Days Traditional Marriage by Nobody: 7:26am On May 23, 2023

Anfield247:
Recently, let me say two to three weeks ago, my mom came back from church, discussing about an upcoming traditional marriage and wedding ceremony of the daughter of one of her church members with my dad. They were busy, I mean my mom and dad were busy talking about how the groom is a wealthy man and how the marriage will be glorious

I didn't even pick interest because I got better things to think about.
The bride-to-be is a graduate from akwa ibom, while the groom-to-be, on the other hand, is a pastor of one popular church in Nigeria, I won't mention the name of the church because not all their pastors are the same.

When they started the relationship, the pastor was rushing everything, he was like he can't wait to marry this pretty damsel.

According to the story, the parents of the both families have met each other, and some part of the traditional marriage has been done.
Everything was going according to plans, they even brought out a pre-wedding photo, which I myself saw on her Facebook. Here is how the marriage took a new twist,

Now, three days to the traditional marriage, the groom-to-be came out and said he's not getting married to the Bride anymore, that is no longer interested in the marriage.

When they asking why, he said it was because of the bride price list they gave to him.

Now, his church said there's no problem about that, that they will sponsor everything, the pastor still vehemently insisted that he is no longer interested in the marriage...

The parents of the girl said the marriage list is always open for negotiation, that it is not compulsory to pay everything at once, or even everything no the list to be paid,The young man still said no.

Now the marriage has been called off and the girl is heart-broken.

My Mom follow the mother of the bride-to-be to do the shopping.
They even invited so many people to the marriage ceremony but it unfortunately ended in the most unbelievable way...

What could possibly be the reason behind his decision?
Can a man go as far as performing some traditional marriage rite just to sleep with a girl?
Could it be because of the list?
Or can infantuation drive a man to do the unthinkable?
Could it be spiritual manipulation or just the matter of choice?

The pastor knows something he is not able to communicate.

Re: Man Rejects His Wife-to-be Three Days Traditional Marriage by Dagger79(m): 7:27am On May 23, 2023

OP when you find out the real reason he doesn't want to marry her, please update us.

Re: Man Rejects His Wife-to-be Three Days Traditional Marriage by Okunrinogun: 8:06am On May 23, 2023

He just find out he's about to tie the knot to retire Olosho

Re: Man Rejects His Wife-to-be Three Days Traditional Marriage by mechanics(m): 8:16am On May 23, 2023

iamL:
Must it be about the woman? That is a method used by some men if they just want to bed a particular lady at all cost. That is why the bible standard of morality will always be the best, girls will never hear.

A former friend of mine did exactly same thing to a lady, the same church pastor stuff.

Today he his paying his debt because the second lady he tried it with tied him down and he is currently fighting for divorce. We have all abonded him and his problematic wife.

hmmmm, am talking base on what I have seen here and life experience, you are also making a point.

Re: Man Rejects His Wife-to-be Three Days Traditional Marriage by BarrElChapo(m): 8:26am On May 23, 2023

Righteousness2:
That is not ordinary! That his not ordinary!

If you don't contend the principalities and powers in your domain, they will war against you.
She needs to contend with powers and forces against her marriage in the place of prayer . Yokes need to be broken.

Advice her to visit the Lord's Chosen

You’re not well sir.

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