₦airaland Forum

EriMma1:
I've been observing this for some time now. Once a couple has lived together for ten years,
the closeness between them reduces. As in.. the man no longer sits with the wife to gist or even play. Meanwhile, you'll still see the woman trying to bond and wanting her man to always be around her.

I noticed this in one couple. In fact they are pastor and Mrs. The woman always follows the man every where and wants to sit where he's sitting but the man would clearly avoid her and go out of sight completely when the tailing becomes too much and only come back when the woman is no longer in sight. Why?

No man born of a woman will try such with me, I'll blank you like you're not there.

Women, you too should wise up and stop making yourselves too available. Make yourself a bit scarce and they'll value you.

because of the spirit of lust in them which causes propensity to commit adultery

Enemyofpeace:
george not, so as not to be george.





Ajepako cone out o

George ko, Peter ni

Go school you refused

Werey Asaba

Familiarity breeds contempt/ resentment
At times long distance in marriage is good

EriMma1:
I've been observing this for some time now. Once a couple has lived together for ten years,
the closeness between them reduces. As in.. the man no longer sits with the wife to gist or even play. Meanwhile, you'll still see the woman trying to bond and wanting her man to always be around her.

I noticed this in one couple. In fact they are pastor and Mrs. The woman always follows the man every where and wants to sit where he's sitting but the man would clearly avoid her and go out of sight completely when the tailing becomes too much and only come back when the woman is no longer in sight. Why?

No man born of a woman will try such with me, I'll blank you like you're not there.

Women, you too should wise up and stop making yourselves too available. Make yourself a bit scarce and they'll value you.

I go even marry another wife and nothing go happen!

EriMma1:
I've been observing this for some time now. Once a couple has lived together for ten years,
the closeness between them reduces. As in.. the man no longer sits with the wife to gist or even play. Meanwhile, you'll still see the woman trying to bond and wanting her man to always be around her.

I noticed this in one couple. In fact they are pastor and Mrs. The woman always follows the man every where and wants to sit where he's sitting but the man would clearly avoid her and go out of sight completely when the tailing becomes too much and only come back when the woman is no longer in sight. Why?

No man born of a woman will try such with me, I'll blank you like you're not there.

Women, you too should wise up and stop making yourselves too available. Make yourself a bit scarce and they'll value you.

What is this? Have you not heard of the Seven Years' Itch. Find out; it's real.

Jman06:
Most women become unattractive once married. That's why married men cheat.

Imagine seeing one hippopotamus with oversized grandma panties everyday. The man is bound to lose interest in her. If not for children and what the society would say, most married men would chase their wives away after few years of marriage.

Omo I go settle down read all the pages of comments then I go come talk my own reason and story....

Socratiz:
Your assertion here is replete with conjectures. You saw one family where the husband is avoiding the wife and you assume it's the same with all families. Even if this is prevalent where you stay, it doesn't mean it's the same everywhere.

There are couples who don't avoid each bother after many years of marriage. In fact, the longer their marriage, the stronger the bond between them.

Couples whose marital bond weakens after a few years must have inherent issues which either they are not aware of, or they choose to ignore. They could also be battling with character flaws.

If you expect your marriage to be peaceful and joyfu, that is what you will experience. But if you leave the back door open, the you will find reason to backtrack and use the door.

The type of marriage you chose to build is the type of marriage you will have.

By the way, I have been married for over 32 years and neither myself not my wife has lost interest in each other.

Oh my God How did you do it??

frozen70:
Any couple you find in this categories are actually living as flat mates and not husband and wife

Though men wants to taste what other women have out there and once they get it especially the ones that are ready to give him hot hot, the one at home becomes less relevant to him

While she is still faithful and looking forward to being with him and Stay close to him at home, he is busy avoiding her because he got a big fish outside

By the time she discovers that he is not giving her the attention she wants, she will face her directions towards the children who will never ignore her and find solace in them

By the time the man is getting old, he starts coming close to the wife, meanwhile she is already done with him but still living with him

That's when the man will become lonely while he is married to his wife

You can only harvest what you sow that's what this life will offer you

Lies from the pit of hell. We can't be eating the Same food everyday

PARADIZEPRIEST:
The woman doesn't give you peace when you come home tired and exhausted.She won't understand till you both shout and querrel

Hahahhahahaha

EriMma1:
I want to believe this the cause.

Babe, no be by fat o. What if the man finds fatty, plumpy women more appealing?

I remember a cousin of mine telling me that the reason his father kept a certain woman as his mistress was because she was fatter than my cousin's mother, his wife. His mother, my Aunt is not even slim o, just kinda thick. It sounded funny to me But then, I began to think the reason the man liked his women heavy could be because of his own slim, smallish stature. It's as if a fat woman amplifies him.
There are lots of factors why these things happen besides getting out of shape, losing their youthfulness or personal grooming. It could be they have become too used to each other, (see themselves finish). Or they've developed new bad habits or traits the other partner dislkes, or their sex life has become boring & spiceless, etc.

EriMma1:
Says a man who will still use the industrious wife's income to chase side chicks.

Who told you I don't have other values apart from sexual and physical attributes? By the way I wasn't talking about myself here but the married couples I've seen it happen to.

Otaga Usifo whos wife was an industrious and high class woman also got the same treatment when her husband left her with all her values to be with a hookup girl (because of the same sexual attributes you are talking against) who ended his life. What do you have to say to that? The woman lacked virtues?

Majority of you men are the most confused entities. You want to have your cake and eat it. You want a woman of virtue and still desire the harlot outside. You think we don't know?

Please someone give this woman a round of applause!

FahBuLous:
They now realise that they (women) have nothing to offer apart from here overused, stretched, rotten, smelly and stinking pussy, just like that of jennyclay and prettygirl200

Your mom is a woman

FahBuLous:
They now realise that they (women) have nothing to offer apart from here overused, stretched, rotten, smelly and stinking pussy, just like that of jennyclay and prettygirl200

Your mom is a woman

Can you say this to her?

The problem is more psychological than physical. First of all, marry your best friend. I can't over emphasise this point enough. MARRY YOUR BEST FRIEND. Marry someone who is your ride or die. Someone who loves you and wants to be with you even in your lowest. Marriage is not easy, because we learn everyday. Issues will definitely arise during marriage. No how, but you have to handle it. Also be truthful to one another. Don't hide things from each other. When one party start becoming secretive, then that marriage is heading for the rocks.

mjuvey3:
Why won't men lose interest when there are sexy and seductive women everywhere.

It takes courage and determination to survive now as a man without cheating.....It's not easy especially if you're rich.

Then don’t get into a relationship. It’s that simple.

This is the reason fathers protect their daughters from men like themselves, the way your gender thinks is just so selfish.

You cannot take it if a woman does it to you but want to do it with impunity.

You will not tolerate a man doing it to your daughter but will want to do the same trash to someone else’s daughter.


Just a very disgusting attitude, no one forces men to marry.

Banbanna:
Babe, no be by fat o. What if the man finds fatty, plumpy women more appealing?

I remember a cousin of mine telling me that the reason his father kept a certain woman as his mistress was because she was fatter than my cousin's mother, his wife. His mother, my Aunt is not even slim o, just kinda thick. It sounded funny to me But then, I began to think the reason the man liked his women heavy was because of slim, smallish stature. It's as if a fat woman amplifies him.
There are lots of factors why these things happen besides getting out of shape, losing their youthfulness or personal grooming. It could be they have become too used to each other, (see themselves finish). Or they've developed new bad habits or traits the other partner dislkes, or their sex life has become boring & spiceless, etc.

Spot on. I thought as much too. See finish can make one get bored of their partners.

dhope:
because of the spirit of lust in them which causes propensity to commit adultery

Yeah. That too.

Jman06:
Because women go out of shape once married due to excessive eating and laziness that hinder them from exercising and keeping fit.

Before you know it they become potbellied, oversized and unattractive. So it is natural for the man to lose interest in her.

I hope all the dudes have become Dwayne Johnson... Yikes.

hardon1:
90% of the comments here are from unmarried people... Hence I don't take it serious.

The major thing is long throat and lack of contentment in men. Whether you like it or not, the woman you marry today will never remain in same shape for the next 10 years.

As humans, we loose our looks with age be it a man or woman. Am yet to be married but I have conceived within myself that whichever lady I marry, a time will come when her skin will lose its smoothness, her breast will sag, her stomach will bulge from childbirth

When these begin to unfold, I wouldn't see it as a surprise or bore. It's ok for women to try to look good as they age. But men should not abandon their women just because they are out of shape.

Come to think of it, even you the man, your shape and other room performance must have dropped tremendously too

Hahaha long throat, ojukokoro.

Hotguy27:
This is my 12th year of marriage and staying together but everyday I still desire my wife. We still sleep in the same bed till date. I tried to reduce the closeness by attempting to sleep in another room or a separate bed but she vehemently disagreed.

You see what I'm saying? The mere fact that you tried to reduce the closeness buttresses what my post is on about. It's the men who start creating the gap.
You got bored I guess... Hm

Thank God she didn't allow you.

They have so pounded their wives' toto that it makes sense no more to them.

Jossyfine:
All the comments above have not actually hit the nail in the right place. The major issue is that African marriages are not laced with romance and affection.
How do I mean?
* Most couple stop showing affection to each other once they start bearing kids and over see finish has crawled into their marriage.
* African couples rarely make out for themselves alone in terms of going on dates ( at least once in a while)
* Marriage is what you put in it ,that’s what you get, you should learn to do things together ie weekends both man and wife can create time to put the huz in order( not by force) but with love cuz it creates bond between couples.
*You can create low budget vacation for just you both without the kids.
*Once in a while try having sex outside the huz, look for an affordable hotel around ur area and maybe do just one night.
* Marriage shouldn’t be about the kids, cuz have noticed what most couple talk about the kids, bills and family issues.Spice it up a little and gist about ur selves, probably the sex you had the previous night😜
* Let there be stewardship ( you guys should always review ur attitude towards each other by asking if each is meeting up expectations etc)*

*Most African couple rarely send romantic messages unlike when they were dating when most times you wake up to see sweet soul piercing messages from ur lover. But in marriage all the messages are for purchases of huz hold items.

Marriage is sweet but not in Africa. Africa marriages are very boring😭

Am just wondering how I survived 10 freaking years 😳😳😳and it’s still counting 😔

The way and manner you survived 10 years and still counting, you will survive more years to come.

The points you listed are very valid. When struggling couples take your counsel, their marriage will take a good course to happy ever after.

So back to you, do what you have pointed out I am sure you will share more success stories.

Jossyfine:
All the comments above have not actually hit the nail in the right place. The major issue is that African marriages are not laced with romance and affection.
How do I mean?
* Most couple stop showing affection to each other once they start bearing kids and over see finish has crawled into their marriage.
* African couples rarely make out for themselves alone in terms of going on dates ( at least once in a while)
* Marriage is what you put in it ,that’s what you get, you should learn to do things together ie weekends both man and wife can create time to put the huz in order( not by force) but with love cuz it creates bond between couples.
*You can create low budget vacation for just you both without the kids.
*Once in a while try having sex outside the huz, look for an affordable hotel around ur area and maybe do just one night.
* Marriage shouldn’t be about the kids, cuz have noticed what most couple talk about the kids, bills and family issues.Spice it up a little and gist about ur selves, probably the sex you had the previous night😜
* Let there be stewardship ( you guys should always review ur attitude towards each other by asking if each is meeting up expectations etc)*

*Most African couple rarely send romantic messages unlike when they were dating when most times you wake up to see sweet soul piercing messages from ur lover. But in marriage all the messages are for purchases of huz hold items.

Marriage is sweet but not in Africa. Africa marriages are very boring😭

Am just wondering how I survived 10 freaking years 😳😳😳and it’s still counting 😔

Lol keep on dreaming, you go soon wake up

Even in abroad marriage is not working that way.

The best option is just for the man to train his hrt to love that woman simple, always
Just keep reminding your self that your wife is the best.
And the wife will have full respect for the man
Not all this end time feminist woman that when there husband talk one they will talk ten

EriMma1:
I've been observing this for some time now. Once a couple has lived together for ten years,
the closeness between them reduces. As in.. the man no longer sits with the wife to gist or even play. Meanwhile, you'll still see the woman trying to bond and wanting her man to always be around her.

I noticed this in one couple. In fact they are pastor and Mrs. The woman always follows the man every where and wants to sit where he's sitting but the man would clearly avoid her and go out of sight completely when the tailing becomes too much and only come back when the woman is no longer in sight. Why?

No man born of a woman will try such with me, I'll blank you like you're not there.

Women, you too should wise up and stop making yourselves too available. Make yourself a bit scarce and they'll value you.

Most times it is not as easy, marriage is different. It's easier to blank a friend out. Now what if some of this women have tried that and it just doesn't work.
Sometimes again the one seeking the attention is the problem actually as she knows what she is doing that is making the man behave that way and she may be cry her eyes out but not ready to change.

EriMma1:
I've been observing this for some time now. Once a couple has lived together for ten years,
the closeness between them reduces. As in.. the man no longer sits with the wife to gist or even play. Meanwhile, you'll still see the woman trying to bond and wanting her man to always be around her.

I noticed this in one couple. In fact they are pastor and Mrs. The woman always follows the man every where and wants to sit where he's sitting but the man would clearly avoid her and go out of sight completely when the tailing becomes too much and only come back when the woman is no longer in sight. Why?

No man born of a woman will try such with me, I'll blank you like you're not there.

Women, you too should wise up and stop making yourselves too available. Make yourself a bit scarce and they'll value you.

You don't expect the wise ones that want to keep their husband to listen to you.

LilMissFavvy:
Definitely not all men lose interest in their wives in future. However any woman who finds herself in this situation should calm down, draw the children to yourself alone, tell them the pain their dad is causing and make sure you have one or two sources of income. Then as the man begins to get older, then you can go ahead and punish him very well. This is where people begin to talk and blame women, they forget the man is reaping what he sowed. Matchew

Chai!

See stupid reasoning

A man is moved by what he sees. If you maintain a flat tummy, big boobs, booty, respect him and know how to kill him I'm bed, he'll forever be yours. Learn from Beyonce

Jossyfine:
All the comments above have not actually hit the nail in the right place. The major issue is that African marriages are not laced with romance and affection.
How do I mean?
* Most couple stop showing affection to each other once they start bearing kids and over see finish has crawled into their marriage.
* African couples rarely make out for themselves alone in terms of going on dates ( at least once in a while)
* Marriage is what you put in it ,that’s what you get, you should learn to do things together ie weekends both man and wife can create time to put the huz in order( not by force) but with love cuz it creates bond between couples.
*You can create low budget vacation for just you both without the kids.
*Once in a while try having sex outside the huz, look for an affordable hotel around ur area and maybe do just one night.
* Marriage shouldn’t be about the kids, cuz have noticed what most couple talk about the kids, bills and family issues.Spice it up a little and gist about ur selves, probably the sex you had the previous night😜
* Let there be stewardship ( you guys should always review ur attitude towards each other by asking if each is meeting up expectations etc)*

*Most African couple rarely send romantic messages unlike when they were dating when most times you wake up to see sweet soul piercing messages from ur lover. But in marriage all the messages are for purchases of huz hold items.

Marriage is sweet but not in Africa. Africa marriages are very boring😭

Am just wondering how I survived 10 freaking years 😳😳😳and it’s still counting 😔

Abeg, stop talking crap!

Marriage is sweet in the West where they do "romance" and "affection", but yet they are having 50% divorce rates?

Romance and affection ko, Lasgidance and defection ni.

If there are anythings that destroy marriages in Africa, they are:

- Men's infidelity and broke-ness
- Women's propensity to be fat, out of shape and unattractive immediately after the first kid

Attractive women make men involuntarily be nice and romantic to them by default. A broke man worrying about money cannot easily be romantic.

Abagworo:
In Nigeria the women cause it by employing "leg lock" as tactics. Once that happens the man will seek alternative and loss of interest follows .

That's true in some cases sha

It's a natural phenomenal called the 7 years theory.

Staying with one woman/man for the rest of your require thorough preparation to adapt and to make compromise else ten years is too much for their home to become boring

EriMma1:
I've been observing this for some time now. Once a couple has lived together for ten years,
the closeness between them reduces. As in.. the man no longer sits with the wife to gist or even play. Meanwhile, you'll still see the woman trying to bond and wanting her man to always be around her.

I noticed this in one couple. In fact they are pastor and Mrs. The woman always follows the man every where and wants to sit where he's sitting but the man would clearly avoid her and go out of sight completely when the tailing becomes too much and only come back when the woman is no longer in sight. Why?

No man born of a woman will try such with me, I'll blank you like you're not there.

Women, you too should wise up and stop making yourselves too available. Make yourself a bit scarce and they'll value you.