₦airaland Forum

AmGreat1234:
What many people are passing through in Lagos is something else. The funny part of it all is that, average of the people suffering there would never want to relocate and try life elsewhere.

occfx:
Yes for fear of been called a failure because it is believed once you go to Lagos, you must make it. Just like someone going to US and coming back with nothing

ipobarecriminals:
we dnt knw the BOSS between computer village/ALABA. Even up till today,ALABA boys from that side they SCAM steady. If nah lie,go to technology/phones thread.

Icrave4u:
YOU WANT TO SURVIVE IN LAGOS: 17 Things you must not do.

1. On a bus, When you sit by the window. Never operate your phone, It will be snatched from your hand. This is a quintessential occurence in some surbuban parts of Lagos such as Agege and Mushin. In fact, anywhere in Lagos.

2. Whenever someone greets you on the road, Do not answer him or her especially when he approaches you from behind.

3. If you see people fighting, Mind your business!!. I repeat MIND YOUR BUSINESS!!

4. You must learn how to argue with a bus conductor, when he tries cheating you.
And please whenever you do. Please don't use Standard English. You must have had a good knowledge of Pidgin before you come to Lagos. If not I can teach you. 🤣

5. Walk with a known Nigerian, on the first weeks of your stay in Lagos. He'll show you the ropes or else you go suffer.

6. Whenever you're walking in a deserted area in Lagos. Walk like a gangster, not like a responsible person. If you do, Miscreants will feel you're defensive and wouldn't come close to you. Street sense ✌🤣

7. Anything you did not find on your head, Please don't pick it. (You understand what I mean).

8. When you're crossing the road. Turn into a Ronaldo. Cars come in massive droves. They won't hit you but you must learn how to dribble them. 🤣

9. When you want to buy soft drinks, Buy soft drinks from people hawking in the traffic. It is believed that the drinks taste sweeter than the ones bought from people in shops😅. Just a belief!!

10. When you see a large number of people running, don't wait or ask questions. Just run with them. RUN RUN RUN!!! Ask when it is safe!! Run o🤣

11. Never leave Lagos without taking a ride on Third Mainland Bridge. It is a sin😅

12. Don't dance to any music you hear, never stare or laugh at people. Don't speak to anyone in the bus until they speak to you first.

13. Whenever you walk in a crowded area, hold your phone firmly in your hand, not in your bag or pocket or else Sope oti lo.

14. Whenever you want to ask for Directions, say this. "Sorry, Please, Excuse me...then ask your question". It is compulsory to say all of them. Don't omit any. Everybody is angry in Nigeria.😂

15. It's often said that the number of people who are mentally normal in Lagos aren't up to 5. In essence, If a Lagosian teases you, don't take him serious. Just be cool to prevent issues. We're mád in this Lagos!!. I am the only nórmal person in my area.

16. There's one popular "Den of scámmers" in Lagos called Computer Village. It is the most popular place for buying and repairing electronic devices. But please and please open your eyes very well before you buy fufu package in a phone case of buy a swapped electronics.😁

17. And lastly LAGOS is a comedy centre, you will love the drama you will be seeing around.

Lagos, Its mix of tradition and modernity, combined with its rich culture and entrepreneurial spirit, makes it an exciting and attractive destination for people from all over the world. Lagos is very very fun and sweet once you understand the system. It's not a bad place to be, it's just a place to be SMART and WISE!!
EKO ILE OGBON!

AmGreat1234:
..and the funny thing is that many of them still end up with nothing.

Didi2d:
I have vowed never to buy second hand phone again.

Those guys don't give a shit.

Many years back at Westminster apapa, they sold a Nokia phone to me filled with fufu.
I got home, charge and charge this phone the phone, omo! When I open phone na fufu I see inside phone o

Goodlyhrt:
Go PH you go know say Lagos dey play

Icrave4u:
YOU WANT TO SURVIVE IN LAGOS: 17 Things you must not do.

1. On a bus, When you sit by the window. Never operate your phone, It will be snatched from your hand. This is a quintessential occurence in some surbuban parts of Lagos such as Agege and Mushin. In fact, anywhere in Lagos.

2. Whenever someone greets you on the road, Do not answer him or her especially when he approaches you from behind.

3. If you see people fighting, Mind your business!!. I repeat MIND YOUR BUSINESS!!

4. You must learn how to argue with a bus conductor, when he tries cheating you.
And please whenever you do. Please don't use Standard English. You must have had a good knowledge of Pidgin before you come to Lagos. If not I can teach you. 🤣

5. Walk with a known Nigerian, on the first weeks of your stay in Lagos. He'll show you the ropes or else you go suffer.

6. Whenever you're walking in a deserted area in Lagos. Walk like a gangster, not like a responsible person. If you do, Miscreants will feel you're defensive and wouldn't come close to you. Street sense ✌🤣

7. Anything you did not find on your head, Please don't pick it. (You understand what I mean).

8. When you're crossing the road. Turn into a Ronaldo. Cars come in massive droves. They won't hit you but you must learn how to dribble them. 🤣

9. When you want to buy soft drinks, Buy soft drinks from people hawking in the traffic. It is believed that the drinks taste sweeter than the ones bought from people in shops😅. Just a belief!!

10. When you see a large number of people running, don't wait or ask questions. Just run with them. RUN RUN RUN!!! Ask when it is safe!! Run o🤣

11. Never leave Lagos without taking a ride on Third Mainland Bridge. It is a sin😅

12. Don't dance to any music you hear, never stare or laugh at people. Don't speak to anyone in the bus until they speak to you first.

13. Whenever you walk in a crowded area, hold your phone firmly in your hand, not in your bag or pocket or else Sope oti lo.

14. Whenever you want to ask for Directions, say this. "Sorry, Please, Excuse me...then ask your question". It is compulsory to say all of them. Don't omit any. Everybody is angry in Nigeria.😂

15. It's often said that the number of people who are mentally normal in Lagos aren't up to 5. In essence, If a Lagosian teases you, don't take him serious. Just be cool to prevent issues. We're mád in this Lagos!!. I am the only nórmal person in my area.

16. There's one popular "Den of scámmers" in Lagos called Computer Village. It is the most popular place for buying and repairing electronic devices. But please and please open your eyes very well before you buy fufu package in a phone case of buy a swapped electronics.😁

17. And lastly LAGOS is a comedy centre, you will love the drama you will be seeing around.

Lagos, Its mix of tradition and modernity, combined with its rich culture and entrepreneurial spirit, makes it an exciting and attractive destination for people from all over the world. Lagos is very very fun and sweet once you understand the system. It's not a bad place to be, it's just a place to be SMART and WISE!!
EKO ILE OGBON!

Tecnophone:
you don't necessarily needs to mention his mother, baboon.

ipobarecriminals:
we dnt knw the BOSS between computer village/ALABA. Even up till today,ALABA boys from that side they SCAM steady. If nah lie,go to technology/phones thread.

Osariemen12:
Simply put, Lagos is not good for sane people. I rather die a villager than live three consecutive calendar months in Lagos - Africa's largest slum.

Mindlog:
The number 4 "You must learn how to argue with a bus conductor, when he tries cheating you. And please whenever you do. Please don't use Standard English. You must have had a good knowledge of Pidgin before you come to Lagos. If not I can teach you".

I am very fluent in Yoruba and Pidgin English but even the last time I was in a bus years ago, I maintained my "Standard English" despite the threats by the bus conductor that he would not give me my N400 change, that I committed a crime by giving him N500. He was ranting in a mix of Yoruba and Pidgin English and I maintained a fixed gaze on him as I do psychiatric patients without responding to his rants, his rants began to weaken and the bus became quiet, I told the driver in a low tone I was dropping off at the next bus stop and the driver told the conductor to please give me my change and he meekly did so.

If you think you are crazy, I spent millions of naira and years in schools to learn how to deal with crazy people.

Icrave4u:
YOU WANT TO SURVIVE IN LAGOS: 17 Things you must not do.

1. On a bus, When you sit by the window. Never operate your phone, It will be snatched from your hand. This is a quintessential occurence in some surbuban parts of Lagos such as Agege and Mushin. In fact, anywhere in Lagos.

2. Whenever someone greets you on the road, Do not answer him or her especially when he approaches you from behind.

3. If you see people fighting, Mind your business!!. I repeat MIND YOUR BUSINESS!!

4. You must learn how to argue with a bus conductor, when he tries cheating you.
And please whenever you do. Please don't use Standard English. You must have had a good knowledge of Pidgin before you come to Lagos. If not I can teach you. 🤣

5. Walk with a known Nigerian, on the first weeks of your stay in Lagos. He'll show you the ropes or else you go suffer.

6. Whenever you're walking in a deserted area in Lagos. Walk like a gangster, not like a responsible person. If you do, Miscreants will feel you're defensive and wouldn't come close to you. Street sense ✌🤣

7. Anything you did not find on your head, Please don't pick it. (You understand what I mean).

8. When you're crossing the road. Turn into a Ronaldo. Cars come in massive droves. They won't hit you but you must learn how to dribble them. 🤣

9. When you want to buy soft drinks, Buy soft drinks from people hawking in the traffic. It is believed that the drinks taste sweeter than the ones bought from people in shops😅. Just a belief!!

10. When you see a large number of people running, don't wait or ask questions. Just run with them. RUN RUN RUN!!! Ask when it is safe!! Run o🤣

11. Never leave Lagos without taking a ride on Third Mainland Bridge. It is a sin😅

12. Don't dance to any music you hear, never stare or laugh at people. Don't speak to anyone in the bus until they speak to you first.

13. Whenever you walk in a crowded area, hold your phone firmly in your hand, not in your bag or pocket or else Sope oti lo.

14. Whenever you want to ask for Directions, say this. "Sorry, Please, Excuse me...then ask your question". It is compulsory to say all of them. Don't omit any. Everybody is angry in Nigeria.😂

15. It's often said that the number of people who are mentally normal in Lagos aren't up to 5. In essence, If a Lagosian teases you, don't take him serious. Just be cool to prevent issues. We're mád in this Lagos!!. I am the only nórmal person in my area.

16. There's one popular "Den of scámmers" in Lagos called Computer Village. It is the most popular place for buying and repairing electronic devices. But please and please open your eyes very well before you buy fufu package in a phone case of buy a swapped electronics.😁

17. And lastly LAGOS is a comedy centre, you will love the drama you will be seeing around.

Lagos, Its mix of tradition and modernity, combined with its rich culture and entrepreneurial spirit, makes it an exciting and attractive destination for people from all over the world. Lagos is very very fun and sweet once you understand the system. It's not a bad place to be, it's just a place to be SMART and WISE!!
EKO ILE OGBON!

occfx:
More miserable and wretched... A place where oxygen is less than 21% na why whites and rich men went closer to the waters. I tell people Lagos is training ground, just go to Lagos and plan your exit from day one. It helps you live anywhere in Nigeria perfectly and agile but staying there permanently is a no no for me

slawomir:
Damnnn niggar
Hell no
Nobody wanna go to that overrated damnnn slum of a place

Not to talk of learning 17 things on how to survive

Rather learn 600 things on how to survive in abuja

Have been to lagos and Abuja as a Bini son

And I must confess lagos is nosiy and a shit hole

xynerise:
In Lagos, don't bring your "Holier than thou" attitude to someone who dresses obscene in the street. Just mind your business