₦airaland Forum

micxwell:
This same man was very successful here in Nigeria. His reason was that he relocated because of his children. He's clearly above 40!
Now the million-dollar question is: Why can't he just send his children abroad for schooling while still practicing in Nigeria? The man said he wants to contribute his knowledge to the international community. He also mentioned he's still in the process of getting his documents assessed so he can start working in Canada. Man isn't planning to return obviously.🤷

you are right - he was doing well in Nigeria - and he sometimes regret travelling but he said he knows what he was getting into - and he prepared for it.. some people here do not want to accept the fact that there are challenges overseas - they think once u japa - stress ends
NOT TRUE AND 50% OF PEOPLE WHO JAPA IN THE LONG RUN WILL NOT BE BETTER OFF THAN THEY WERE BEFORE THEY LEFT
Money is not the only yardstick to measure my statement above about being better off - personal happiness, family integration and community are also very very important

These are the most important to a man's life - most people will not realize it yet because they are hungry in naija- once that need of hunger has been satisfied, then they will know money alone is not everything. some family members who were born in Nigeria have not seen each other for 30 years - because everyone japa to different places - mehnnn let me stop, it's just crazy!!!

ogbonti:
you are right - he was doing well in Nigeria - and he sometimes regret travelling but he said he knows what he was getting into - and he prepared for it.. some people here do not want to accept the fact that there are challenges overseas - they think once u japa - stress ends
NOT TRUE AND 50% OF PEOPLE WHO JAPA IN THE LONG RUN WILL NOT BE BETTER OFF THAN THEY WERE BEFORE THEY LEFT
Money is not the only yardstick to measure my statement above about being better off - personal happiness, family integration and community are also very very important

These are the most important to a man's life - most people will not realize it yet because they are hungry in naija- once that need of hunger has been satisfied, then they will know money alone is not everything. some family members who were born in Nigeria have not seen each other for 30 years - because everyone japa to different places - mehnnn let me stop, it's just crazy!!!

To be honest, living in Nigeria has become increasingly scary with each passing day. The unpredictability of daily life is alarming, as things can change dramatically. It is unfortunate that our leaders are not doing anything positively to the present situation. Recently, I had a distressing experience while commuting to my office in Ogun state, which left me astounded.

I was riding in a commercial bus when we were abruptly halted at a police checkpoint, despite the fact that the driver was not on high speed. On the opposite lane, there was a young man in his car who was also instructed to stop, which he obediently did. Surprisingly, one of the police officers began shouting at the young man, demanding that he exit his vehicle. Although the man may have appeared suspicious, looking like yahoo boy, the officers proceeded to harass him, forcibly removing him from his car and subjecting him to physical assault in front of numerous onlookers, despite heavy traffic on both lanes. Furthermore, they fired warning shots into the air, thereby endangering bystanders and intensifying the fear and chaos in the situation. I just look at the those animals in police uniform if they are really normal human being. There oga IG is there in Abuja not addressing these issues of constant harassment and extortion by their boys. Even if the guy was a suspect it don't warrant show of shame I saw that day.

These officers were stationed on the road to address issues related to cult activities. However, the question arises: is this kind of behavior considered normal or acceptable? I would prefer to live in a saner country whether I make or don't make enough to live than live in abundance where I can be harrass for no just course. To be factual Nigeria is turning completely to jungle.

ogbonti:
you are right - he was doing well in Nigeria - and he sometimes regret travelling but he said he knows what he was getting into - and he prepared for it.. some people here do not want to accept the fact that there are challenges overseas - they think once u japa - stress ends
NOT TRUE AND 50% OF PEOPLE WHO JAPA IN THE LONG RUN WILL NOT BE BETTER OFF THAN THEY WERE BEFORE THEY LEFT
Money is not the only yardstick to measure my statement above about being better off - personal happiness, family integration and community are also very very important

These are the most important to a man's life - most people will not realize it yet because they are hungry in naija- once that need of hunger has been satisfied, then they will know money alone is not everything. some family members who were born in Nigeria have not seen each other for 30 years - because everyone japa to different places - mehnnn let me stop, it's just crazy!!!

please who told you Nigerians are happy?

micxwell:
Man is lying!

I was shocked

somehow:
What a mindset.

Tell Adenuga, Alibaba, Basketmouth, AY, Dangote, Otedola, Alakija, and a host of other successful people in Nigeria why they have refused to japa.

Japa is mostly for hopeless people who have no hope here in Nigeria. There are exceptions but very few.


While location matters alot, your decision making ability is the most important.

I can remain in Nigeria and make it 10x faster than those who move abroad (Then start traveling all over for holidays) if my decision making ability is topnotch (So far I thank God for everything).

A monkey is a monkey irrespective of where it finds itself.

Many with a wrong m8ndset travel without a plan and end up doing brawn or dirty jobs over there, and always dodging immigration.

Most have zero idea what they'll meet when they get there. I'm sure its only when they're an hour away from descending, reality strikes them but they've burnt that bridge behind them.

somehow:
What a mindset.

Tell Adenuga, Alibaba, Basketmouth, AY, Dangote, Otedola, Alakija, and a host of other successful people in Nigeria why they have refused to japa.

Japa is mostly for hopeless people who have no hope here in Nigeria. There are exceptions but very few.


While location matters alot, your decision making ability is the most important.

I can remain in Nigeria and make it 10x faster than those who move abroad (Then start traveling all over for holidays) if my decision making ability is topnotch (So far I thank God for everything).

A monkey is a monkey irrespective of where it finds itself.

Impressive summations.

MimiSheWrote:
Hello Everyone, first of all I apologize in advance for the long note and also about my English, not actually my first language.

My name is Mimi, I was born in Nigeria... But cos of the nature of my dad's profession i have spent around 75% of my life in different countries outside Nigeria... Mostly in EU.

Well enough said about myself, cos this topic is not about me but about Nigerians... Our general mentality and perception of abroad.

Guys listen up... All that glitters is not really gold. Out there is not entirely what people think it is. And you might think just because I have spent so much time outside Nigeria i do not understand the struggle in Nigeria and therefore not qualified to tell you all this "nonsense"..... I completely get it.. trust me.

But even a random 3 years old kid knows that the country is messed up and nothing to write home about, we all know about the Suffering, depression and "starvation level of poverty" in Nigeria yeah.... That's why everyone is desperatly looking for a way out, no doubt... but trust me, JAPA is not 'always' your ticket out of poverty... Well 'sometimes' it is... but most times it's just your direct ticket to being subjected to racism,more depression,more struggles,several mental disorder,homelessness, modern day slavery and the list goes on and on.

Trust me... when it comes to hustling field, success is much more louder than failure. cos our mind was designed to constantly search for hope. which means you would quickly hear about the lucky 3% that made it big through JAPA, but hardly hear about the remaining unlucky 97% that found themselves in worse possible condition after the same JAPA. There's no money tree out here... there's no diamond river out here...
Is there more opportunities? Well yes, But there are millions of people that already done and still doing whatever you intend to come do over here and yet they are still in the worse condition than you are in right now.

You would literally cry when you see what most of our African brothers and sisters go through around the world in the name of Japa. And as a Nigerian?? Trust me it gets worse.. and your chances gets even much smaller. Cos no one trust Nigerians anymore any where around the world and I believe we all know why.

Sorry but I'm not trying to burst anyone's bubble, kill anyone's vibe or being a negative biitch! Naaaah I'm only trying to be realistic! I'm only trying to tell you something no travel agent would ever tell you and something people abroad hardly tell you, and even when they eventually do tell you...? You don't believe them.. instead you result to asking them questions like "why are they still there if it's that bad"? .....

Well.... You wanna know why most of them are still there? Let me tell you why... there is a psychological reason for that... First They are still in DENIAL. Imagine dreaming your entire life to travel abroad and finally have a good life, you probably invested almost everything or everything you have got to make it happen (your money, your time, your last hope)
But then you finally got there and then meet a reality that is entirely different from your life long dreams and perception of these faraway green lands?
I don't know if you know... but our brain is defensive in nature, it will automatically switch straight to denial mode... Leaving you with atleast enough 'hope and wait for a magic or should i say a miracle' (afterall this is abroad where magic happens?)
This is just one of the reasons why most of these people continue sticking around instead of returning home.

Another reason is that they are worried about what people back home would say or think... Because the people back home also got this general fvcked up mentality and very high expectation of people coming back from Japa (y'all need to stop it! Y'all need to get rid of that mentality, seriously ) cos like I said earlier... there is no bleeping money tree over there! I don't know where Nigerians got that idea from in the first place...
It needs to stop, yall driving the youth nuts with such mentality, it's doing more harm than good. That high expectation/ pressure back home is mostly the reason our people are more likely to result to crime out here (so just stop it! )

I have met alot of other African nationalities abroad... and amazingly they don't share the same mentality we have about Abroad. They treat abroad as just another hustling ground and not a direct ticket to success... Therefore they are more relaxed and less pressured than Nigerians out here.

Moving Abroad is not such a bad idea though, it worked and still works for few lucky ones (including my Family) it would be wrong and biased of me if I fail to mention that..
There are plenty of and more opportunities over out here not doubt...
But what I'm just saying is that... it's not always that easily reached.. as most people automatically believe.
Look... Somehow all these countries are intelligently designed In such a way that it take back almost entirely everything you make out here from you one way or the other... Through tax, through mind blowing bills or random expenses around every corner.

And at the end of the day you realize you are nothing but a modern day slave building someone's country for free... And without freedom.

Most people screaming Japa in Nigeria are far in better living condition and more stable mentally ,more happy than majority of people in the so called abroad without even knowing it. Sometimes Instead of gambling and betting your hard earned million of naira on Japa, it's more advisable to chill out... relax and invest that Millions in Nigeria. I'm just saying... You would probably end up living a life most people over there can only envy and dream of.

Thanks for reading my long note... I hope this helps someone in making a life decision out there. #ItsYourGurlMimi

True that.

UnfairLife7:
please who told you Nigerians are happy?

don’t worry - just like you didn’t know you were happy under Jonathan when at least you could transport yourself anywhere to eat jollof rice with your family and fiends (even when you could not afford it, someone close to you was able to afford it and called you to join him to eat) today looking back, Jonathan’s era looks like the golden age of Nigeria - you will not know the happiness you enjoy seeing your family members everyday until some day you japa and u can’t see them for almost 10 years and some of them start dying and getting buried in your absence - you will cry secretly and no one will be there to console you - then you will realize that money is indeed not everything but family and friends being together is everything - you will never make sense of these things i tell you until you experience it, i know because i have experienced it .. this is why Tevez left a contract of $400,000 a week in Manchester City to go stay in Argentina for 12 weeks without permission from his club because he was missing home… and when he was told by his Coach Roberto Mancini that his contract will be terminated - he said, so be it — just think about this - 400k a week, he gave up for his personal happiness - his wife and kids were not happy at Manchester and he had to leave with them to Argentina so they can be happy and he never cared about the money 💰 when he finally returns to Europe he took almost 60% pay cut to go play for Juventus of Italy because his family was happy in Turin, Italy 🇮🇹 than England 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿 because Juventus could not afford to pay him $400k a week but about $170k a week- he took that pay cut for happiness - think about that 😂

Adriano did the same when he was at Inter Milan - money is not everything— family, friends and community is everything - you can only realize this when you make money and these 3 things are absent when the money comes - then you will realize money is not everything - take care!

ogbonti:
don’t worry - just like you didn’t know you were happy under Jonathan when at least you could transport yourself anywhere to eat jollof rice with your family and fiends (even when you could not afford it, someone close to you was able to afford it and called you to join him to eat) today looking back, Jonathan’s era looks like the golden age of Nigeria - you will not know the happiness you enjoy seeing your family members everyday until some day you japa and u can’t see them for almost 10 years and some of them start dying and getting buried in your absence - you will cry secretly and no one will be there to console you - then you will realize that money is indeed not everything but family and friends being together is everything - you will never make sense of these things i tell you until you experience it, i know because i have experienced it .. this is why Tevez left a contract of $400,000 a week in Manchester City to go stay in Argentina for 12 weeks without permission from his club because he was missing home… and when he was told by his Coach Roberto Mancini that his contract will be terminated - he said, so be it — just think about this - 400k a week, he gave up for his personal happiness - his wife and kids were not happy at Manchester and he had to leave with them
to Argentina so they can be happy and he never cared about the money 💰 when he finally returns to Europe he took almost 60% pay cut to go play for Juventus of Italy because hia family was happy in Turin, Italy 🇮🇹 than England 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿 because Juventus could not afford to pay him $400k a week but about $170k a week- he took that pay cut for happiness - think about that 😂

Adriano did the same when he was at Inter Milan - money is not everything— family, friends and community is everything - you ca only realize this when you make money and these 3 things are absent when the money comes - then you will realize money is not everything - take care!

If you care to know, there's nothing as bad as POVERTY. I know of a family who are extremely poor. Luckily for them a total stranger helped one of the son abroad. This year makes it 11 years he left Nigeria. He has completely changed his family fortune and he's very much happy and fulfilled. A family that struggle to feed daily has become self sufficient. Yes he will miss his family no doubt. But claiming he isn't happy because he has been away for 11 years then i put it to you that you're absolutely wrong. Looking at where his family was in the past and where his family is today gives him joy. He's married over there and has 2 lovely kids. American citizens.

I guess you don't know what POVERTY entails and i sincerely pray you don't know it in your lifetime.

olufak2001:
It's a pity that most people don't really know what is going on out there. Abroad is a good place to stay but if there is anyway to send your money home for investments, please do. Most of the money you make there will go back into the system. I have lived in Europe for good two years and I can say one or two things about Europe.

Also if you are above 45 years, please do a lot of research before you move. It takes time before you can get your documents.

Netherlands is a good place to live but if you have a study permit.

Most Nigerians will ignore this advise, they will just sell all their property and move without doing proper risk analysis

UnfairLife7:
If you care to know, there's nothing as bad as POVERTY. I know of a family who are extremely poor. Luckily for them a total stranger helped one of the son abroad. This year makes it 11 years he left Nigeria. He has completely changed his family fortune and he's very much happy and fulfilled. A family that struggle to feed daily has become self sufficient. Yes he will miss his family no doubt. i But claiming he isn't happy because he has been away for 11 years then i put it to you that you're absolutely wrong. Looking at where his family was in the past and where his family is today gives him joy. He's married over there and has 2 lovely kids. American citizens.

I guess you don't know what POVERTY entails and i sincerely pray you don't know it in your lifetime.

when someone commits suicide in the western world - the question is always How ? why ? he or she has it all why take their own life?

let me tell u about someone everyone in Nigeria knows who took his own life

UCHENNA OKAFOR - he was one of the great pillars of the Nigerian Super Eagles 🦅 that played at the USA’94 team- he lived in Dallas- he was a naturalized US citizen - his kids are US citizens and his wife is… so sad he never left a note or bothered to tell anyone his secret pains which you - writing here on nairaland may never believe or accept - Yes, if he was happy with his life, he wouldn’t take it, YET by your assumptions here, since he lives in Almighty America and his kids are US citizens- it is a feast of hallelujah in his heart, right? WRONG!!!

Lastly the Nigerian man who killed himself in Finland recently who is from Edo State was NOT poor- he even built himself a house in Finland- luckily he left a video and stated how empty he has become in life because the ex wife took his kids away from him - something that simple (to you because u don’t see that impact but u think money is everything) made him commit suicide

My brother - who told you I haven’t seen poverty ? I went to school in Nigeria and I know what it means to be hungry at lunch break and you will walk past the kiosks and see your friends buy guguru and ekpa and u can’t buy for myself - and will trek home with other classmates under the hot sun after school so i get it and i can understand what real poverty is.

but according to the Maslowian hierarchy of needs - as it applies to self actualization - which is at the apex of everyone’s needs in life, money takes a back seat because the craze for financial acquisitions is not to watch a stock pile of currency but to use it to create love, satisfying family needs and community integration and staying abroad is never a way to achieve that self actualization with family

99% of diasporans cry at least once a week - they may never accept it or want to show like they are tough - but I am one and i know a few who talk to me honestly - they cry because they see their years of life taken away by time with them living in economic exile instead of enjoying their lives back home with their friends and family they were born together and grew up with and the environment that is natural to their very existence

if you have never lived overseas for at least 5 straight years without going to Nigeria - you will never understand what i am typing here - it is meant for those who have travelled this path.. and I have been on this path now for almost 30 years so i can authoritatively tell you what and how it is

i will end it here - God bless you and thanks for your time , bye!

ogbonti:
when someone commits suicide in the western world - the question is always How ? why ? he or she has it all why take their own life?

let me tell u about someone everyone in Nigeria knows who took his own life

UCHENNA OKAFOR - he was one of the great pillars of the Nigerian Super Eagles 🦅 that played at the USA’94 team- he lived in Dallas- he was a naturalized US citizen - his kids are US citizens and his wife is… so sad he never left a note or bothered to tell anyone his secret pains which you - writing here on nairaland may never believe or accept - Yes, if he was happy with his life, he wouldn’t take it, YET by your assumptions here, since he lives in Almighty America and his kids are US citizens- it is a feast of hallelujah in his heart, right? WRONG!!!

Lastly the Nigerian man who killed himself in Finland recently who is from Edo State was NOT poor- he even built himself a house in Finland- luckily he left a video and stated how empty he has become in life because the ex wife took his kids away from him - something that simple (to you because u don’t see that impact but u think money is everything) made him commit suicide

My brother - who told you I haven’t seen poverty ? I went to school in Nigeria and I know what it means to be hungry at lunch break and you will walk past the kiosks and see your friends buy guguru and ekpa and u can’t buy for myself - and will trek home with other classmates under the hot sun after school so i get it and i can understand what real poverty is.

but according to the Maslowian hierarchy of needs - as it applies to self actualization - which is at the apex of everyone’s needs in life, money takes a back seat because the craze for financial acquisitions is not to watch a stock pile of currency but to use it to create love, satisfying family needs and community integration and staying abroad is never a way to achieve that self actualization with family

99% of diasporans cry at least once a week - they may never accept it or want to show like they are tough - but I am one and i know a few who talk to me honestly - they cry because they see their years of life taken away by time with them living in economic exile instead of enjoying their lives back home with their friends and family they were born together and grew up with and the environment that is natural to their very existence

if you have never lived overseas for at least 5 straight years without going to Nigeria - you will never understand what i am typing here - it is meant for those who have travelled this path.. and I have been on this path now for almost 30 years so i can authoritatively tell you what and how it is

i will end it here - God bless you and thanks for your time , bye!

Your posts are educative and therapeutic In a way. That some are arguing against your position may make you feel it's just getting negative vibes, bit I beg to differ. So, don't be in a hurry to say bye. You don't know who and whom would stumble on this thread as years goes back and would have to lean upon your wisdom to make transformational decision

Stick in inspite of the back and forth arguements. Society should interact but try to find a healthy posture and maintain communications

acorntree:
To be honest, living in Nigeria has become increasingly scary with each passing day. The unpredictability of daily life is alarming, as things can change dramatically. It is unfortunate that our leaders are not doing anything positively to the present situation. Recently, I had a distressing experience while commuting to my office in Ogun state, which left me astounded.

I was riding in a commercial bus when we were abruptly halted at a police checkpoint, despite the fact that the driver was not on high speed. On the opposite lane, there was a young man in his car who was also instructed to stop, which he obediently did. Surprisingly, one of the police officers began shouting at the young man, demanding that he exit his vehicle. Although the man may have appeared suspicious, looking like yahoo boy, the officers proceeded to harass him, forcibly removing him from his car and subjecting him to physical assault in front of numerous onlookers, despite heavy traffic on both lanes. Furthermore, they fired warning shots into the air, thereby endangering bystanders and intensifying the fear and chaos in the situation. I just look at the those animals in police uniform if they are really normal human being. There oga IG is there in Abuja not addressing these issues of constant harassment and extortion by their boys. Even if the guy was a suspect it don't warrant show of shame I saw that day.

These officers were stationed on the road to address issues related to cult activities. However, the question arises: is this kind of behavior considered normal or acceptable? I would prefer to live in a saner country whether I make or don't make enough to live than live in abundance where I can be harrass for no just course. To be factual Nigeria is turning completely to jungle.

Imagine

Wodu89:
Your posts are educative and therapeutic In a way. That some are arguing against your position may make you feel it's just getting negative vibes, bit I beg to differ. So, don't be in a hurry to say bye. You don't know who and whom would stumble on this thread as years goes back and would have to lean upon your wisdom to make transformational decision

Stick in inspite of the back and forth arguements. Society should interact but try to find a healthy posture and maintain communications

you are a very wise person and i will heed your advise - thanks 🙏🏽

UnfairLife7:
bro, i am in your shoe presently. I graduated with strong 2.1, narrowly missed first-class. I earn 25k monthly as a classroom teacher. I can't afford 2 square meal daily. Most of the jobs (either government or private) are being shared amongst the highest bidder. Nigerians are suffering. I was advised to consider applying to US graduate school with full funding. I can't even think straight anymore. Yet, i have siblings looking up to me. It's really frustrating bro

My brother i believe in japa for who can afford it..its not easy getting documentations here to start up but its worth it...if you can afford it, USA, Schengen EU regions, Australia, UK...these places will present opportunity for a good life to u.

chelsea1116:
My brother i believe in japa for who can afford it..its not easy getting documentations here to start up but its worth it...if you can afford it, USA, Schengen EU regions, Australia, UK...these places will present opportunity for a good life to u.

May God ease my affair. I am losing my mind in this country seriously.

ogbonti:
when someone commits suicide in the western world - the question is always How ? why ? he or she has it all why take their own life?

let me tell u about someone everyone in Nigeria knows who took his own life

UCHENNA OKAFOR - he was one of the great pillars of the Nigerian Super Eagles 🦅 that played at the USA’94 team- he lived in Dallas- he was a naturalized US citizen - his kids are US citizens and his wife is… so sad he never left a note or bothered to tell anyone his secret pains which you - writing here on nairaland may never believe or accept - Yes, if he was happy with his life, he wouldn’t take it, YET by your assumptions here, since he lives in Almighty America and his kids are US citizens- it is a feast of hallelujah in his heart, right? WRONG!!!

Lastly the Nigerian man who killed himself in Finland recently who is from Edo State was NOT poor- he even built himself a house in Finland- luckily he left a video and stated how empty he has become in life because the ex wife took his kids away from him - something that simple (to you because u don’t see that impact but u think money is everything) made him commit suicide

My brother - who told you I haven’t seen poverty ? I went to school in Nigeria and I know what it means to be hungry at lunch break and you will walk past the kiosks and see your friends buy guguru and ekpa and u can’t buy for myself - and will trek home with other classmates under the hot sun after school so i get it and i can understand what real poverty is.

but according to the Maslowian hierarchy of needs - as it applies to self actualization - which is at the apex of everyone’s needs in life, money takes a back seat because the craze for financial acquisitions is not to watch a stock pile of currency but to use it to create love, satisfying family needs and community integration and staying abroad is never a way to achieve that self actualization with family

99% of diasporans cry at least once a week - they may never accept it or want to show like they are tough - but I am one and i know a few who talk to me honestly - they cry because they see their years of life taken away by time with them living in economic exile instead of enjoying their lives back home with their friends and family they were born together and grew up with and the environment that is natural to their very existence

if you have never lived overseas for at least 5 straight years without going to Nigeria - you will never understand what i am typing here - it is meant for those who have travelled this path.. and I have been on this path now for almost 30 years so i can authoritatively tell you what and how it is

i will end it here - God bless you and thanks for your time , bye!

There is always a price to pay in life whether you are in Nigeria or overseas

higgs:
The write up is very balanced.I agree with what she is saying. Even if You disagree with the Op,be civil about it.No need attacking or insulting her.

Hello there? Can I help you?

okerekingsley90:
There is always a price to pay in life whether you are in Nigeria or overseas

that's true. There advantages and disadvantages to everywhere you go. But as nigeria and the rest of Africa is, one needs 2 citizenship. The west countries plan for your retirement but in Nigeria if your investments go the bad way,and you loose everything, you are on your own. I have 2 passports and I know how to use them for the advantage of myself and family.