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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / How Do You Manage With A Wasteful Over Sabi Wife (18264 Views)
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Re: How Do You Manage With A Wasteful Over Sabi Wife by PeachtreeReside(f): 8:20pm On Dec 11, 2023 |
Jughead29: A woman who is 15yrs in marriage to be petted and coaxed over her bad behaviour? Is she contributing towards the welfare of the home that is making her spend without logic? 1 Like |
Re: How Do You Manage With A Wasteful Over Sabi Wife by rickyrex(m): 8:30pm On Dec 11, 2023 |
Kobojunkiee:so if i go to work; get tired and come back my wife should still expect me to enter kitchen and cook right? 1 Like |
Re: How Do You Manage With A Wasteful Over Sabi Wife by MrSmithy: 8:50pm On Dec 11, 2023 |
Bros just reduce her upkeep with the excuse that salaries have been cut down at your work place due to high inflation and you go see how she go immediately get sense...Na she go even begin manage pass u sef |
Re: How Do You Manage With A Wasteful Over Sabi Wife by Kobojunkiee: 8:56pm On Dec 11, 2023 |
rickyrex:You could choose to cook on the weekends instead and save food in the fridge to be eaten during the week. |
Re: How Do You Manage With A Wasteful Over Sabi Wife by Kobojunkiee: 8:57pm On Dec 11, 2023 |
stormborn28:This is a marriage that you insult, not just the woman in it. |
Re: How Do You Manage With A Wasteful Over Sabi Wife by SilentCraver: 8:59pm On Dec 11, 2023 |
Firstly, I commend how you have been patient and you are ready to explore solutions rather than opt for divorce straight up. Secondly, I think it is very manly of you to insist on protecting your wife's privacy and seeking help for that which you're pushed to the wall about. Also, you're not recounting how you're being financially responsible to her, as a husband should be. I suggest you make use of upright professional marriage counsellors subsequently. Social media advisors mostly confuse and poison people's hearts against minor errors of their spouse. As long as a spouse is not cheating or being abusive, other things can be resolved amicably through communication between you two. Going forward, this issue seems very easy. It appears that you give her money for groceries monthly. How about you tell her to draft a list of the home's monthly needs. Then, you create time one weekend and go shopping with her or by yourself (with the excuse that she should rest or visit her family/good friends) or with your kids to bond with them. Your wife may be from a large family and is used to making food for many people in her house. I am sure she would feel bad for not being able to scale down on the foodstuff...HELP her to gauge them. Give her money for non-food essentials like you usually did, but for food; BUY BY YOURSELF. Go with her to the market, to pass a message to her that you're only after a solution and not inferring that she is insufficient as a wife. Empathise with her and treat her with the patience that you would have your son-in-law/brother-in-law offer. I am a woman and have come to learn that the toughness of marriage can be lightened through adequate communication between spouses. Afterall, we grew up in different backgrounds, so there is plenty need to overlook non-toxic traits. And then get help to rectify them. You may purchase financial discipline books for her such as The Smart Money Woman by Ugwu Arese. 1 Like |
Re: How Do You Manage With A Wasteful Over Sabi Wife by stormborn28(m): 9:00pm On Dec 11, 2023 |
Kobojunkiee: So when you tell someone truth, it means an insult... I hail your reasoning |
Re: How Do You Manage With A Wasteful Over Sabi Wife by Clazzone(m): 9:02pm On Dec 11, 2023 |
It's simple, let her experience little scarcity of food for like 3 months, she will adjust. Cut down the feeding expenses, let's say you always buy a bag of rice, you can deliberately buy quarter and apply this approach in other food stuff. She will learn, don't play ... 1 Like |
Re: How Do You Manage With A Wasteful Over Sabi Wife by Kobojunkiee: 9:03pm On Dec 11, 2023 |
stormborn28:You claim you are telling the truth but all I see you doing here is seeking ways to insult the woman for it all. |
Re: How Do You Manage With A Wasteful Over Sabi Wife by stormborn28(m): 9:11pm On Dec 11, 2023 |
Kobojunkiee: You are the one seeing it as insult. A person who is ready to learn will not see it that way.. The formula I'm using to train my children today were learnt in five different working organization the deals in child minder. Training in seminars. I should throw in the towel when I felt I'm being " disrespect ". I have told my wife many women are refusing to learn. That will continue to affect them in marriage or in their personal life. |
Re: How Do You Manage With A Wasteful Over Sabi Wife by gladdensir(m): 9:34pm On Dec 11, 2023 |
Kobojunkiee: Some people just bereft sense naturally |
Re: How Do You Manage With A Wasteful Over Sabi Wife by kushme: 10:50pm On Dec 11, 2023 |
Timetravel88: Neither flesh nor blood revealed that to you. I have been spending little satisfactorily as a single guy for a long time now. Only for me to currently find myself being entangled with a female in my peaceful and quiet space. I now feel it like a force to care for her, I truly don't like it... I find it really hard living with a woman in my space for long(er) period of time. I feel like society and my urge for coitus are straight reasons why some of us want them in our spaces.... Maybe for babies,too. 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: How Do You Manage With A Wasteful Over Sabi Wife by BscHolder: 12:33am On Dec 12, 2023 |
brain54:bro you sabi. Forget all those lame excuses bro is fed up with the woman's attitude and responsibilities don choke am . He says he wants to run away but for the kidsy who does that ? |
Re: How Do You Manage With A Wasteful Over Sabi Wife by Myer(m): 5:17am On Dec 12, 2023 |
vazsily:This is why the bible says "a prudent wife is a gift from God." When a wife is wasteful her husband is in trouble. When a wife knows how to manage resources, how blessed is her husband. Three solutions in my opinion; 1. Do the shopping once or twice and show her what's acceptable. You have to be stern about this. She sincerely might not see any thing wrong in her actions until you show her. Her upbringing is likely responsible for this. 2. Reduce her allowance and get her to start doing business and understand the value of money. She will learn to spend wisely. 3. You should both see your marriage counsellor if you have one in your church. You're also indulging her so you both could use some counselling. Some may not understand the gravity of what you're going through but it has sent many men to early grave due to high BP and overweight of responsibilities. Do some thing fast before some thing do you. 1 Like |
Re: How Do You Manage With A Wasteful Over Sabi Wife by Offpoint1: 7:55am On Dec 12, 2023 |
vazsily:Been there... Solution: Don't buy food items, only fill up cooking gas. Give her weekly cash you know it'll cover for the whole week and locked up. Let her know in clear term, once that money finishes, you don't have any money to give until NEXT week. 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: How Do You Manage With A Wasteful Over Sabi Wife by Vind4favor(m): 11:02am On Dec 12, 2023 |
vazsily:open communication (tell her what you don't like about food mangmt and others) REPEATEDLY. Manage her. No perfect partner just like you are not. If you change partner over mismanagemt of resources and others. Women are black market, you can hardly predict what next woman will turn out to be. You must set a budget for feeding and let her know that the food must last you till next salary |
Re: How Do You Manage With A Wasteful Over Sabi Wife by stacyadams: 11:46am On Dec 12, 2023 |
vazsily: Leave am run for 2 weeks ,then come back.make she use her money run am |
Re: How Do You Manage With A Wasteful Over Sabi Wife by rickyrex(m): 4:33pm On Dec 12, 2023 |
Kobojunkiee:and that is if i'm a good cook |
Re: How Do You Manage With A Wasteful Over Sabi Wife by donwitty(m): 5:10pm On Dec 12, 2023 |
Re: How Do You Manage With A Wasteful Over Sabi Wife by OvertheTop(m): 7:10pm On Dec 12, 2023 |
Kobojunkiee: Kobo J, Stop all this Talk naa, Can the Wife Earn what the Husband is currently earning to Foot all the Home Bills?? Mostly Impossible... |
Re: How Do You Manage With A Wasteful Over Sabi Wife by Kobojunkiee: 8:16pm On Dec 12, 2023 |
rickyrex:Well, you can go in as an assistant then because the complaint is related to the cooking. |
Re: How Do You Manage With A Wasteful Over Sabi Wife by Kobojunkiee: 8:18pm On Dec 12, 2023 |
OvertheTop:Who said she has to earn what the husband is earning or foot all the bills? Cooking for family is not even a parttime gig so why do you expect her to replace him as a fulltime earner?. |
Re: How Do You Manage With A Wasteful Over Sabi Wife by Joshcoli(m): 8:26am On Dec 13, 2023 |
vazsily: My brother, you dey argue with feminist. You get time ooo |
Re: How Do You Manage With A Wasteful Over Sabi Wife by Joshcoli(m): 8:31am On Dec 13, 2023 |
vazsily: This was my approach to managing our household: while my wife wasn't giving away food, she cooked abundantly, resulting in meat being everywhere. To manage this surplus, I encouraged sharing. I took charge of all the household bills and proposed that she solely handle the expenses related to cooking, specifically for stews and soups. However, when she served me food, I noticed only two small pieces of meat compared to the previous occasions when there might have been up to five pieces in a single soup. It seemed that when women spend their own money, they tend to make adjustments accordingly. |
Re: How Do You Manage With A Wasteful Over Sabi Wife by Joshcoli(m): 8:33am On Dec 13, 2023 |
Fountainofyouth: Let the spending on food comes from her, she will adjust accordingly |
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