₦airaland Forum

Lifeinlight:
Reason why some women dey show men like you pepper for abroad. No any iota of sense

I pity the unfortunate woman that'd end up with you.

Insulting him for a statement like that, shows the kind of person you are.

Rubbish 👀.

It is not scriptural for a lady to build with you, the bible says, develop "your" business before "you" build "your" house. And again, they're called help meet, not help build.

Following this instruction brings peace of mind and gives you dominion.

Connected1:
Insulting him for a statement like that, shows the kind of person you are.

Rubbish 👀.

Birds of same feather obviously flocks together

Wisegeek01:
Heres why ladies refuse to build with guys
.. Experience ✨

and i cant blame them for that,
because this my gender, men!!
They can ghost ehh!
Today you are dating, tomorrow is saturday you see trad on their friends status😎🥂 ..

but thats not to say ladies don't ghost too oo, one of my guys they ghosted during university, fell sick for 1 month, i mean he said theres nothing he didnt do for her, even that he was repeating a year is because of her, they dated for the whole time frame in school, same set, and towards finals she was bringing invitation card, ma guy fainted, when i talked to him, he was like nwa nkwo na zu, ngbe mmiri na ezo, je ulo ogwu ( the lady i backed inside rain to the hospital ) but you see this gist, i wil gist another day.

So ladies do too, and they usually do it to someone they think is unserious about marriage, whether they love the person or not, ( i dont know if they are usually under pressure from family or peers - but this will be another topic for another day )

while the guys ghost a lady they feel dont have all the requirements, but both of them are sneaky and using the same formula, no closure, just ghosting, i will understand if theres no closure for a toxic relationship, but a relationship that had no flaws, you just wake up one morning and jump out of the molue ( i.e assuming your relationship is the bus)
Why ?
I mean thats what c0wards do

Now back to the real question, why dont ladies build with guys again ..

See let me tell you dating anyone is a 50/50 percent chance, anyone can wake up the next day and break up, or worse you wake up and find out they are getting married or married with 6 kids or any other reason (for the men), or they have a hidden child or children from different men or any other reason ( for the women )

So now for the guys,

what's to say the guy will continue to marriage stage when he has money, that he wont dump you for his dream girl, and you have to start from scratch again ..
So i never blame any lady that says they wont build with a guy, their reason is valid, but ..

For the ones who choose to build with the guy, kudos to them, but ..

While you are at that please build yourself too .. i cannot vouch for any human being or any man, build yourself in the relationship too, learn skills, get certifications, as he is growing you are growing,

If he refuses, your growth !!

omo i give you the permission to leave him, that is a very bad boy .. a narcss!st to say the least .. because if that guy eventually gets money and gets someone else, you have your years of achievements to console you, you wont be starting out again with nothing ..

Now if you decide not to build with a man, like i said, you have good reasons too, but ..

While you wait for your prince charming, please build yourself also, you cant just be dancing on social media and saying all sorts about wanting a big man or saying things like if your boyfriend is not given you 500k monthly dump him, or if his account bal is not up to 50m dump him .. what audacity for someone that has no skills, i mean they say empty barrels do what 😅

So you think a big man will just gallivant and coman carry you like that so you can be doing tiktok in his parlour .. they too know what they are looking for, and if they carry u best bet theres only one thing they need from you at that point in time ..

So build yourself while you wait for prince charming, a way of encouraging him, that ..
"see ma guy nothing loss" i gat you
--------------------------------------


And for the guys that want to know what to be doing in relationships that they are building, maybe the lady is not supporting you or is achieving more than you -- i.e you want to know what to do, i will cover that in another post,

Now another topic that is coming is -- when to dump a guy or a lady in a relationship, i will cover these together
..
You guys just follow up, give me your feedback, negative or positive, i need it to get better, at this point i drop my pen,
..
my brain wan burst ..

----------------
Image created with ( BingArt )
If you will like to learn this or any other Tech skill ( Transition to tech ) --- let me know
-----------------

I am Wisegeek
a Serious Tech Guy in real life😎
---
i give you my honest perspective on every topic or trend
i dont do gender stuff ( new topic alert )
i say it as it is no sugarcoating
And i am very sarcastic too 🙂
...

Building with someone is a risk that is strictly by choice. its 50/50.

I have a nigga that trained my pry. sch. class mate to college of Edu. Today as we speak, they are happily married with 4 kids.
When taking such risks, have it in mind that; If it works out, fine and if otherwise, u deal with it😎

Fahvvy:
This is a very balanced write up ...

I personally don't want a woman to "build" with me ... Let her use that "building materials" to build herself instead ...

Good one.She will build with you and rub it on your face

Aaaaarghmed:
yes,she would have made a very good partner at that time.We have not spoken in years,I deleted all her social media handles,so i dont even know where she is.I trained myself to move on and never look back.sometimes,i feel she regrets because i was a good boyfriend.I tried,she tried.Nothing wey we no pass through for this life.I mean,nothing.No longer interested in marriage.will just have a kid that's all.thats is why I dont want a broke lady now,because there is nothing for her to build in me anymore,at least a rich lady,we go complement ourselves.

Very good one.

Wisegeek01:
Heres why ladies refuse to build with guys
.. Experience ✨

and i cant blame them for that,
because this my gender, men!!
They can ghost ehh!
Today you are dating, tomorrow is saturday you see trad on their friends status😎🥂 ..

but thats not to say ladies don't ghost too oo, one of my guys they ghosted during university, fell sick for 1 month, i mean he said theres nothing he didnt do for her, even that he was repeating a year is because of her, they dated for the whole time frame in school, same set, and towards finals she was bringing invitation card, ma guy fainted, when i talked to him, he was like nwa nkwo na zu, ngbe mmiri na ezo, je ulo ogwu ( the lady i backed inside rain to the hospital ) but you see this gist, i wil gist another day.

So ladies do too, and they usually do it to someone they think is unserious about marriage, whether they love the person or not, ( i dont know if they are usually under pressure from family or peers - but this will be another topic for another day )

while the guys ghost a lady they feel dont have all the requirements, but both of them are sneaky and using the same formula, no closure, just ghosting, i will understand if theres no closure for a toxic relationship, but a relationship that had no flaws, you just wake up one morning and jump out of the molue ( i.e assuming your relationship is the bus)
Why ?
I mean thats what c0wards do

Now back to the real question, why dont ladies build with guys again ..

See let me tell you dating anyone is a 50/50 percent chance, anyone can wake up the next day and break up, or worse you wake up and find out they are getting married or married with 6 kids or any other reason (for the men), or they have a hidden child or children from different men or any other reason ( for the women )

So now for the guys,

what's to say the guy will continue to marriage stage when he has money, that he wont dump you for his dream girl, and you have to start from scratch again ..
So i never blame any lady that says they wont build with a guy, their reason is valid, but ..

For the ones who choose to build with the guy, kudos to them, but ..

While you are at that please build yourself too .. i cannot vouch for any human being or any man, build yourself in the relationship too, learn skills, get certifications, as he is growing you are growing,

If he refuses, your growth !!

omo i give you the permission to leave him, that is a very bad boy .. a narcss!st to say the least .. because if that guy eventually gets money and gets someone else, you have your years of achievements to console you, you wont be starting out again with nothing ..

Now if you decide not to build with a man, like i said, you have good reasons too, but ..

While you wait for your prince charming, please build yourself also, you cant just be dancing on social media and saying all sorts about wanting a big man or saying things like if your boyfriend is not given you 500k monthly dump him, or if his account bal is not up to 50m dump him .. what audacity for someone that has no skills, i mean they say empty barrels do what 😅

So you think a big man will just gallivant and coman carry you like that so you can be doing tiktok in his parlour .. they too know what they are looking for, and if they carry u best bet theres only one thing they need from you at that point in time ..

So build yourself while you wait for prince charming, a way of encouraging him, that ..
"see ma guy nothing loss" i gat you
--------------------------------------


And for the guys that want to know what to be doing in relationships that they are building, maybe the lady is not supporting you or is achieving more than you -- i.e you want to know what to do, i will cover that in another post,

Now another topic that is coming is -- when to dump a guy or a lady in a relationship, i will cover these together
..
You guys just follow up, give me your feedback, negative or positive, i need it to get better, at this point i drop my pen,
..
my brain wan burst ..

----------------
Image created with ( BingArt )
If you will like to learn this or any other Tech skill ( Transition to tech ) --- let me know
-----------------

I am Wisegeek
a Serious Tech Guy in real life😎
---
i give you my honest perspective on every topic or trend
i dont do gender stuff ( new topic alert )
i say it as it is no sugarcoating
And i am very sarcastic too 🙂
...

Very balanced. Well done.

I'll not allow any woman to build with me, build yourself because I'm not settling for less.

Achor1111:
Nwa nkwo n'azu jee ulogwu mgbe mmiri n'ezo got me.

really got me 😪😪😪😪

MrPresident1:
Ladies are not supposed to build anything with anybody. The are supposed to be married, brought into the house and pampered forever. The man is the provider and pamperer. The woman is the nurturer and keeper of the home

This notion of building together is a western idea, it has no place in African culture or in the Bible. But since we are living in western times, we have to conform until their time is over.

Husbands must seek to provide fully for their homes, this must be your overall goal, stop looking at your wife's money, she can lend some to you and you have to return it, this is how a man can be in charge of his home. When a man starts to see splitting of bills with his wife as obligatory then he will lose the right to her submission to him.

Your points are biased. We're no longer in the bible era. This is Social medias era and the amount of big phones and data couple with home responsibilities is killing men faster.
So forget the submission, infact you can be in charge but bring something to the table you must.
I can't kill myself

pacespot:
Most of the so called ladies building with guys are even hindering to the guys' potentials. Except you can fund his business project or sponsor him abroad, don't claim that you are building with him just because you are dating him when he is broke.

baba u are wrong building does not only require financial assistance. It includes encouragement, belief, connections etc.

Wisegeek01:
Heres why ladies refuse to build with guys
.. Experience ✨

and i cant blame them for that,
because this my gender, men!!
They can ghost ehh!
Today you are dating, tomorrow is saturday you see trad on their friends status😎🥂 ..

but thats not to say ladies don't ghost too oo, one of my guys they ghosted during university, fell sick for 1 month, i mean he said theres nothing he didnt do for her, even that he was repeating a year is because of her, they dated for the whole time frame in school, same set, and towards finals she was bringing invitation card, ma guy fainted, when i talked to him, he was like nwa nkwo na zu, ngbe mmiri na ezo, je ulo ogwu ( the lady i backed inside rain to the hospital ) but you see this gist, i wil gist another day.

So ladies do too, and they usually do it to someone they think is unserious about marriage, whether they love the person or not, ( i dont know if they are usually under pressure from family or peers - but this will be another topic for another day )

while the guys ghost a lady they feel dont have all the requirements, but both of them are sneaky and using the same formula, no closure, just ghosting, i will understand if theres no closure for a toxic relationship, but a relationship that had no flaws, you just wake up one morning and jump out of the molue ( i.e assuming your relationship is the bus)
Why ?
I mean thats what c0wards do

Now back to the real question, why dont ladies build with guys again ..

See let me tell you dating anyone is a 50/50 percent chance, anyone can wake up the next day and break up, or worse you wake up and find out they are getting married or married with 6 kids or any other reason (for the men), or they have a hidden child or children from different men or any other reason ( for the women )

So now for the guys,

what's to say the guy will continue to marriage stage when he has money, that he wont dump you for his dream girl, and you have to start from scratch again ..
So i never blame any lady that says they wont build with a guy, their reason is valid, but ..

For the ones who choose to build with the guy, kudos to them, but ..

While you are at that please build yourself too .. i cannot vouch for any human being or any man, build yourself in the relationship too, learn skills, get certifications, as he is growing you are growing,

If he refuses, your growth !!

omo i give you the permission to leave him, that is a very bad boy .. a narcss!st to say the least .. because if that guy eventually gets money and gets someone else, you have your years of achievements to console you, you wont be starting out again with nothing ..

Now if you decide not to build with a man, like i said, you have good reasons too, but ..

While you wait for your prince charming, please build yourself also, you cant just be dancing on social media and saying all sorts about wanting a big man or saying things like if your boyfriend is not given you 500k monthly dump him, or if his account bal is not up to 50m dump him .. what audacity for someone that has no skills, i mean they say empty barrels do what 😅

So you think a big man will just gallivant and coman carry you like that so you can be doing tiktok in his parlour .. they too know what they are looking for, and if they carry u best bet theres only one thing they need from you at that point in time ..

So build yourself while you wait for prince charming, a way of encouraging him, that ..
"see ma guy nothing loss" i gat you
--------------------------------------


And for the guys that want to know what to be doing in relationships that they are building, maybe the lady is not supporting you or is achieving more than you -- i.e you want to know what to do, i will cover that in another post,

Now another topic that is coming is -- when to dump a guy or a lady in a relationship, i will cover these together
..
You guys just follow up, give me your feedback, negative or positive, i need it to get better, at this point i drop my pen,
..
my brain wan burst ..

----------------
Image created with ( BingArt )
If you will like to learn this or any other Tech skill ( Transition to tech ) --- let me know
-----------------

I am Wisegeek
a Serious Tech Guy in real life😎
---
i give you my honest perspective on every topic or trend
i dont do gender stuff ( new topic alert )
i say it as it is no sugarcoating
And i am very sarcastic too 🙂
...

. Na sex dey spoil everything.

Jeon:
Op you're right on this, but some people will still disagree 👎 with you.





As if he won't get it from someone else, or leave the moment she declined.
This can come as a surprise to see him choosing the one giving him regular sex over you building with him.



I learned from people's Relationship.This thing matter no concern me

Life is full of colorful fun for us to be deceiving ourselves.

Some Ladies will also leave of there is no sex involve... My own life experience...

Criticism about guys comes to FP but criticism about ladies doesn't come FP. Nairaland.

Jeon:
Your sister didn't cover 98% of people [man or woman ] that decided to keep their body or be a faithful partner.




Am I crying? I just dropped my own opinion just as you did. And no heart break cuz I don't do relationship,because of the negative results are higher than the positive ones. It is a dirty game.

Shukurah Muhammed Aisha is that why
you raped your sisters and mom,
confess now because I have your
pictures and videos. no hiding for you,
Efulefu!

Wow! your story is pathetic, thank God you had achievement after all. She may be crying had I known where ever she is. Life is indeed full of ups and downs.

Aaaaarghmed:
From experience,people change.Maturity is important and people should love genuinely not fake.Everyone is giving out limited emotions nowadays.Many fake people than real people.I had someone years back who we were assisting and helping ourselves with good mind,but as usual,if woman dey assist you,you no go hear word again,as a man if you are broke and dating,dont be broke for long.she will gbaga.I was broke for long,but I kept reassuring her to be patient ,because i had visions,i had plans,i was striving very hard,she saw it and she knew i am not lazy.But women must listen to outsiders,who will want to crash any good thing,she listened at the end.As God will have it ,all the big plans we usually discuss even as money no dey,I don achieve dem.sometimes,e dey pain me say she no trust me upon all the re assurances.Now,I would have given her all she asked for.This is a lady that follow me to trek in wuse 2 to be submitting my cv for job,we trek from afternoon till evening.She really tried,but people no allow us rest.Dem poison her mind.To see a strong and matured lady who will build with you no easy.Am not blaming ladies, I know some guys after having money,abandon ladies too.i just wrote a snippet of my experience with the only lady who would have had access to everthing I have in this life,only if she believed in me till the end.

MSN1:
Building with someone is a risk that is strictly by choice. its 50/50.

I have a nigga that trained my pry. sch. class mate to college of Edu. Today as we speak, they are happily married with 4 kids.
When taking such risks, have it in mind that; If it works out, fine and if otherwise, u deal with it😎

These days i wont advice anyone to train anyone, but if you want to do it, here is what you must add ..

As the guy as you are training her, build up yourself too to meet up with current trends, make you no go dey old fashioned

Also note that training the lady is as a friendly gesture, have that in mind, so contribute what you can, what you wont regret later, if she say she no do again .. you cant force her

For the lady, if you want to train a guy, omo .. i'd have said don't, but ..
Contribute the little you can also as a friend .. why ?
The guy might still not end up with you,
The guy might get too relaxed ( yes this happens too)
The guy can pick another small girl that has nothing, under your nose and be giving her the money you are giving him

ofexpryz:
. Na sex dey spoil everything.

If you remove sex and money, dating and relationships will go down by 70% 😅😁

Lifeinlight:
If you must build with a potential man, make sure no sexual intercourse between you guys

In this day and age, that would be difficult, because of society and peer pressure ..


Let me explain ..
The guy has friends, the lady has friends
The will listen to them
The guys friends will tell him, she dey use your head, wise up,
The girls friend will tell her, you dey waste your time with who dey !mp0tent, dey play, time dey go
..

The only way this works is if both the lady and the guy agree to stand by this, are equally making money and contributing somehow, even if the guys own is higher, fine

.. together they can push back whatever societal pressure is saying, coupled with their self discipline, because .. man no be firewood 😅.

Tatinus:
really got me 😪😪😪😪

The guy was crying, and catarrh was in his nose when he was saying it .. me in my mind i was like, see as adult dey cry oo .. my gawd !!

I will still tell the story iny next few post, with full details

Niyi4321:
Your points are biased. We're no longer in the bible era. This is Social medias era and the amount of big phones and data couple with home responsibilities is killing men faster.
So forget the submission, infact you can be in charge but bring something to the table you must.
I can't kill myself

You get points oo .. and vybes, and if you check my previous post, i said something similar, but there's where you need to draw the line ..see based on experience of people travelling out now, like uk, the woman needs .. i said need, to show you how important .. needs to have a job .. because if dem hit you with Taxes for UK, you go start dey find your bearing

Meself dey wonder about the guy matter

PureFace1:
Let ladies speak for themselves, are you a lady ?

Gosh! There's always a wanna be hero

Lol this advice isn't right sha

Iamzik:
Very relatable. I advise you reconsider her if she's still available. She had faith in you but was discouraged. Sometimes ladies are encouraged when they see evidence that your efforts are yielding fruit. I feel she will make a better partner than another lady that will meet you as "ready made" I hope you understand what I'm saying

Àbí o! The shocking greed and uncouth attitude of so many ladies nowadays is causing a bad rift and perspective about 9ja ladies home and abroad. Many intentional men have become broken and tired, and hence why more are opting for single/baby mama life. Problem is such moves have started destroying the society's family units and values.

santaclaws:
Most Nigerian men nowadays aren't even looking for ladies to build with, they wanna make their money before settling down and that's why a lot of ladies in their 30s are complaining that men don't wanna get married.

At the end of the day, ladies are the ones being affected the most. 🤷🏾‍♂️

ogaontop:
@op, can you please define "build with a man" because it's not clear.
So any girl that stays with you when you don't have money has built with you Even when she's putting you under unnecessary pressure or even fucking other men while you're together?

Bro, in today's Nigeria, many girls who stay with a man when he doesn't have money have not seen a better "serious" alternative or she's expecting you hit it big soon, of which when you didn't, she will start giving you headache!
Know this and know peace!

To help you better understand, i will explain the opposite ..

You are not building with a man, if you are just there occupying space and demanding for money for upkeep, and giving sx ..

You must not add money or contribute financially, but if you can great ..

But if you can add value like

.. i'd give you another analogy, A lady i once dated was always on point about new opportunities, and value we could add to ourselves, and she knew a lot of people like if i needed a particular service she knew who to call

.. and each time i get a contract through her i split the money, (thats me personally i wont say you should do it) .. we didnt end up together for other reasons .. and it was on a good note, we still talk

EconFinance:
Building with a man is a risk

So I don't blame women who don't

But I'll say it's a risk worth taking especially when it pays off down the line

You would never know if it will pay off or not .. thats why you build yourself too along the way, some ladies forget to do that .. and have to start after if anything goes sideways

The op is removed from reality......

MSN1:
Building with someone is a risk that is strictly by choice. its 50/50.

I have a nigga that trained my pry. sch. class mate to college of Edu. Today as we speak, they are happily married with 4 kids.
When taking such risks, have it in mind that; If it works out, fine and if otherwise, u deal with it😎

Thanks for my next topic idea 🥂😎

aimmoney9:
The op is removed from reality......

Dem no dey ever fit satisfy una 😁

GreatAchiever1:
The whole point of being in a relationship is to know the mentality, ideology and character of the opposite sex and see if it matches what you are looking for, and also be open about what you want. But it seems everyone these days is in a relationship for their selfish reason with their own sinister motive behind it.

The problem.....

Every woman believe they deserve the best while men do not......

Wisegeek01:
In this day and age, that would be difficult, because of society and peer pressure ..


Let me explain ..
The guy has friends, the lady has friends
The will listen to them
The guys friends will tell him, she dey use your head, wise up,
The girls friend will tell her, you dey waste your time with who dey !mp0tent, dey play, time dey go
..

The only way this works is if both the lady and the guy agree to stand by this, are equally making money and contributing somehow, even if the guys own is higher, fine

.. together they can push back whatever societal pressure is saying, coupled with their self discipline, because .. man no be firewood 😅.

My sis was married as a virgin @24. All those ones you listed are for immature ones. You didn't have a business discussing your relationship with friends


Also, iron sharpen iron. A good husband materials will get a good wife materials

loswhite:
Write up without direction making front page...smh

Please help us direct the writeup, thats why you are here ..