₦airaland Forum

Biglittlelois:
Some ladies are not meant to be mothers, very stupid woman with no outa of shame, she's breastfeeding yet whoring about knowing diseases can be transmitted through breastfeeding, I'm so sad for the innocent child 😢

If possible let your brother forcefully take the child away from her if that's what it takes for the toddler to be healthy.

helo my millionaire uncle is loookin for a beautiful womens who can do housegirl work.he ready to pay u a cool 30k (N30,000 nIara..cash) a months which will including housegirl uniform plus cool cap & u will all so get breakfast & diner..this is a shance for u to make extra moiney.are u intaresssted please?

Ahniin:
Like seriously?
Did you read the part where he cited INFIDELITY?
TRULY THAT CHILD NEEDS THE MOTHER TO NESTLE HIM DUE TO THE FACT THAT HES STILL NESTLING ON HER MILK,but in cases like this,due to the whorring nature of the birth giver,the child is better off with the father as it stands.


Please be logical with your reasoning and keep your emotions in check.


Another good thing is....they can co-parent ,it's a flexible decision.
And if she refuses the co parenting thingy..oga abeg find way take that baby from her for good.


No be every woman fit to bear the tag of a MOTHER.

The man can't take care of the child. He'd only outsource his wellbeing to his family or friends.

Poor child now suffering from result of poor decisions of two people.

That’s insane. What kind of STDs does the baby have?

Might also be a result of sexual abuse since the baby is left on their own without supervision.

Smartdoctor:
Good evening guys, please I need an urgent legal advisors in the forum to assist my cousin brother.
He had divorced and sent her wife back to the village for the past six months ago.
But the court asked him to be paying a certain amount of money monthly for the child's wellbeing which he has been doing.
But unfortunately the effect of the money has never been significant by looking at the physical appearance of the child.
He always sends relatives to check on the child of which several reports have reached him about how the boy is always been abandoned to be wandering about alone while the mother will be hanging out with friends.
What strucked him to his nerves was the recent report about the child been seriously sick and rumours that the mother now deals with several sexual partners while still breastfeeding the child....
He travelled from Abuja immediately to his hometown to retrieve the boy via court order but unfortunately the court denied him because the baby is believed to be too young at 1 year and 3 months old.
Now that the court had adjourned the case till 28th this month, he however decided to stay put in his hometown to treat the baby. The baby was taken to the hospital. the doctor took off his clothes and to our greatest suprise, the child's body looks so rough, rashes and boils all over her armpit down to his genital region.
Laboratory test was carried out and the report showed that the child have sexually transmitted infections. Fungi infection (,jock itch) and candidiasis.
All these evidences have been push to the judge phone and what we are afraid of, is the possibility of the judge cautioning her to take care of the child and allow her to continue taking the child's custody.
Can he take the child forcefully after having all these evidences against the mother?

LilMissFavvy:
The child is better off staying with the mother. If your friend cared so much about the child, he shouldn't have left his marriage with a baby as young as that. He should face his life, and stop monitoring what his ex wife does with her body, he himself will want to remarry and then dump the child in hands of a step wife. He is not different.

You should have easily modified...

cococandy:
That’s insane. What kind of STDs does the baby have?

Might also be a result of sexual abuse since the baby is left on their own without supervision.

Is jock itch and candidiasis

You are a f000l, I don't know why you should call me names, instead of dropping your own contributions. Go back and read my comment, if you still cannot get the point, then something is definitely wrong with you. Why is he monitoring his ex wife and her relationship(s)? His child's mother is fairing badly, he refuses to help, yet all he does is send people to monitor her and give reports. Does he expect those people to bring back good reports? He will also remarry or date, and I am very sure when he remarries, the child's fate will be worse off in the hands of a step mother. He can always attend to the child's medical care, while the child remains with the mother.

TheWinterBird:
OP, your "cousin brother" is doing the right thing. Big props to him. The fact that he has been sending her money and keeping an eye on his son's wellbeing/welfare are indications that he's a present father and good man, as he has not abandoned his child despite their divorce. Kudos to him for taking him to the hospital for medical attention, including tests. Please don't listen to any ugly comment above telling him to "face his life" and simply abandon the child. I hope he's able to get custody. God bless him.



How is he monitoring what she does to her body? He did the right thing taking him to the hospital to get him checked out and have tests carried out on him, which revealed he has sexually transmitted infections. Is that not something he should be concerned about? Your telling him to abandon the child is really the height of wickedness.

cococandy:
That’s insane. What kind of STDs does the baby have?

Might also be a result of sexual abuse since the baby is left on their own without supervision.

It’s fungal infection, people get fungal infections due to a number of different causes. I don’t think calling it sexually transmitted infection is correct unless they are saying that the child has been sexually abused. It could be due to the child’s environment, diet , malnutrition many other factors. Many children get fungal infections, ringworm, rashes, etc…

Smartdoctor:
Is jock itch and candidiasis

Smartdoctor:
Is jock itch and candidiasis

So it’s not an std.

You might still have a case as far as neglect but the baby doesn’t have HIV which is the STD transmissible by breast milk. So you can’t say he got an STD from her breast milk.

Even if she has gonorrhea, Syphilis, herpes, chlamydia etc. the baby can’t get it through breast milk.

I know you hate that she’s sleeping around but as distasteful as it is to do that while breastfeeding, there’s nothing anyone can do about that because she’s within her rights to do so.

Drop the STDs claim and find a way to prove your case of neglect then maybe a judge might listen to you. Good luck to you and that poor baby

Double0h7:
It’s fungal infection, people get fungal infections due to a number of different causes. I don’t think calling it sexually transmitted infection is correct unless they are saying that the child has been sexually abused. It could be due to the child’s environment, diet , malnutrition many other factors. Many children get fungal infections, ringworm, rashes, etc…

I know.

I just wanted him to clarify what type of STD we’re talking about before I jump to conclusions to tell him he’s wrong. I did have a feeling it might not be an STD unless some pervert was didling that baby. Thankfully it wasn’t so.

cococandy:
So it’s not an std.

You might still have a case as far as neglect but the baby doesn’t have HIV which is the STD transmissible by breast milk. So you can’t say he got an STD from her breast milk.

Even if she has gonorrhea, Syphilis, herpes, chlamydia etc. the baby can’t get it through breast milk.

I know you hate that she’s sleeping around but as distasteful as it is to do that while breastfeeding, there’s nothing anyone can do about that because she’s within her rights to do so.

Drop the STDs claim and find a way to prove your case of neglect then maybe a judge might listen to you. Good luck to you and that poor baby

How come she has the same signs of infection all over her and her baby sister was telling me that they've warned her not to breastfeed the child untill she gets treated. Not until the father later tested the child himself in the hospital's diagnostic centre

Smartdoctor:
How come she has the same signs of infection all over her and her baby sister was telling me that they've warned her not to breastfeed the child untill she gets treated. Not until the father later tested the child himself in the hospital's diagnostic centre

I don’t know man.

Skin infections can be transmissible. It doesn’t mean it’s an STD. They may just have a general lack of good hygiene in that house. If she doesn’t have HIV and your baby didn’t get HIV from her, then it’s not from the breast milk. It doesn’t mean you don’t have a case.

You do because she’s clearly not taking care of him well.
Just find another angle to go about proving your case. if you keep harping on her “whoring around”, a judge might just look at you a scorned ex spouse who’s not happy the ex is moving on.

What names did I call you in my post? You quoted my post calling me names, not the other way around. But let's play that game now: what names did I call you in my post below, Miss Blind Bat? It's you that something is wrong with, LilMissFrustrated.

Secondly, you seem to lack reading comprehension skills or these your eyes must be severely damaged because of the total rubbish you wrote again. You're crazy with the way you're just making up your your own stories without going by OP's post. OP CLEARLY wrote that the guy has been sending her money every month for the child's wellbeing but he doesn't see any significant effects of the money on the child. If she's spending the money anyhow or not using it to take care of the child, how is that his fault if she's suffering, as you claim? His main concern is the child and if she's not using it to fend for the child, then that IS what concerns him and the more reason he should get custody, or should he continue to waste money to not see her use it on the child? Or he should be rushing there everytime the child falls sick? At this point, it makes sense for the child to be under his custody as he will take better care of him and the mother can continue her shenanigans.

Lastly, that he will remarry and the child's fate will be worse is another nonsense you keep shouting. The man is an involved father, so if he does remarry he will definitely watch over his son as he is doing now. If he does get custody and remarries, I hope he will marry a loving and kind woman who will love and care for the child. With the way, you attacked the OP unecessarily up there and telling him to leave the child, you're obviously a pained and frustrated single mother, as well as the type to abuse children. Monster.

LilMissFavvy:
You are a f000l, I don't know why you should call me names, instead of dropping your own contributions. Go back and read my comment, if you still cannot get the point, then something is definitely wrong with you. Why is he monitoring his ex wife and her relationship(s)? His child's mother is fairing badly, he refuses to help, yet all he does is send people to monitor her and give reports. Does he expect those people to bring back good reports? He will also remarry or date, and I am very sure when he remarries, the child's fate will be worse off in the hands of a step mother. He can always attend to the child's medical care, while the child remains with the mother.

cococandy:
I know.

I just wanted him to clarify what type of STD we’re talking about before I jump to conclusions to tell him he’s wrong. I did have a feeling it might not be an STD unless some pervert was didling that baby. Thankfully it wasn’t so.

I was hoping you’d comment on that part because it was irking me out but I didn’t have the knowledge to explain that he was reaching with that claim. Thank you for clarifying though ❤️

Ps. You’re a stunnah! It’s nice to put a face to the legend 😁

Op, drop this STD scope, it won't sail. That child does not have any STD. I am seriously suspecting a diaper dermatitis with some extension to the other parts of the body. The uncomfortable hot weather of the past few weeks could have made this worse. Diaper rash is not uncommon in this age group especially those of them that do not change diapers often. How much does your brother send monthly for the child's upkeep? Is this money enough to supply enough diaper for the child so that he does not wear one for the whole day? This child does not look malnourished judging from the arm seen in the posted picture. I doubt the judge will grant you custody of this child based on this false std claim. Feel free to post the laboratory results here let us dissect them for you. Last last na full blood count and malaria parasite test dem do.

Double0h7:
I was hoping you’d comment on that part because it was irking me out but I didn’t have the knowledge to explain that he was reaching with that claim. Thank you for clarifying though ❤️

Yea I had to. And I did my best to be gentle with him because it seems he cares about the baby.
But it had to be said

Ps. You’re a stunnah! It’s nice to put a face to the legend 😁

Aww thank you ☺️

An unnecessary long epistle again from the NL $he goat, I have read the first paragraph, scanned through the rest, tra$h as usual, the winter*beech who is always online to feed the male ego . You didn't call me names when you quoted my comment and told the OP to ignore "wicked comments".... you definitely r craszyy. Anytime I drop comments I think of the now/future . A female child is better off with the mother than the dad, if the OP wishes his baby the best, he should not have sent mother and child to the village, he is supposed to get them accommodation in a comfortable place, at least for old times sake. That was my point.

The ill!terate you are, didn't care to ask the type of toilet the baby uses and water baby drinks, most infections can be contracted from toilet, water, dirty environment, etc. Provide accommodation for your child/mother, and stop sending people to monitor your ex wife, that's my point, because you don't know if they will speak the truth or not. As a single father, we do not even know if he doing worse than the woman.

TheWinterBird:
What names did I call you in my post? You quoted my post calling me names, not the other way around. But let's play that game now: what names did I call you in my post below, Miss Blind Bat? It's you that something is wrong with, LilMissFrustrated.

Secondly, you seem to lack reading comprehension skills or these your eyes must be severely damaged because of the total rubbish you wrote again. You're just making up your your own story without going by OP's post. OP CLEARLY wrote that the guy has been sending her money every month for the child's wellbeing but he doesn't see any significant effects of the money on the child. If she's spending the money anyhow or not using it to take care of the child, how is that his fault if she's suffering, as you claim? His main concern is the child and if she's not using it to fend for the child, then that IS what concerns him and the more reason he should get custody, or should he continue to waste money to not see her use it on the child? Or he should be rushing there everytime the child falls sick? At this point, it makes sense for the child to be under his custody as he will take better care of him and the mother can continue her shenanigans.

Lastly, that he will remarry and the child's fate will be worse is another nonsense you keep shouting. The man is an involved father, so if he does remarry he will definitely watch over his son as he is doing now. If he does get custody and remarries, I hope he will marry a loving and kind woman who will love and care for the child. With the way, you attacked the OP unecessarily up there and telling him to leave the child, you're obviously a pained and frustrated single mother, as well as the type to abuse children. Monster.

He should go and do DNA test first or is DNA only required for marriages that are still intact?

I nor know how una dey do am but for Benin, we dey wear timberland take mount the place.... Another man no deh train our children....
Even if na Garri we dey drink, them go follow us drink am....

How u go dey send money ND your kid is still looking like this??

Ogun dey kee the judge and the woman??

Hmmm

Smartdoctor:
Good evening guys, please I need an urgent legal advisors in the forum to assist my cousin brother.
He had divorced and sent her wife back to the village for the past six months ago.

But the court asked him to be paying a certain amount of money monthly for the child's wellbeing which he has been doing.

But unfortunately the effect of the money has never been significant by looking at the physical appearance of the child.

He always sends relatives to check on the child of which several reports have reached him about how the boy is always been abandoned to be wandering about alone while the mother will be hanging out with friends.

What strucked him to his nerves was the recent report about the child been seriously sick and rumours that the mother now deals with several sexual partners while still breastfeeding the child....
He travelled from Abuja immediately to his hometown to retrieve the boy via court order but unfortunately the court denied him because the baby is believed to be too young at 1 year and 3 months old.

Now that the court had adjourned the case till 28th this month, he however decided to stay put in his hometown to treat the baby. The baby was taken to the hospital. the doctor took off his clothes and to our greatest suprise, the child's body looks so rough, rashes and boils all over her armpit down to his genital region.

Laboratory test was carried out and the report showed that the child have sexually transmitted infections. Fungi infection (,jock itch) and candidiasis.

All these evidences have been push to the judge phone and what we are afraid of, is the possibility of the judge cautioning her to take care of the child and allow her to continue taking the child's custody.
Can he take the child forcefully after having all these evidences against the mother?

they should engage NGOs that deal with stuff like this together with the court herring .Kudos to Dad for following up with his child, I can bet my left balls loads of men would have just given up and 4goten about mother and child by now!

Get a DNA test to be sure of your stand first. It will be an emotional blackmail if you are not the real father.

MrBrownJay1:
again, you need to have concrete proof that the state of the child is due to the reckless actions of the mother.... so if all the above you mentioned can be contracted while in contact with other kids at kindergarden or in the compound where they live, then your whole plot will fail.

have you tried talking to mama? have you tried co-parenting? have you tried being closer to the child so that you can be more present in his life to monitor his/her wellbeing? remember, no matter how hard you hate that woman or what type of reckless life she lives, she IS and will STILL remain the child's mother and therefore would have rights to have access to the child (if/when the child is in your care).

Which concrete proof you need again the child don dey knack to contract STIs?

LilMissFavvy:
An unnecessary long epistle again from the NL $he goat, I have read the first paragraph, scanned through the rest, tra$h as usual, the winter*beech who is always online to feed the male ego . You didn't call me names when you quoted my comment and told the OP to ignore "wicked comments".... you definitely r craszyy. Anytime I drop comments I think of the now/future . A female child is better off with the mother than the dad, if the OP wishes his baby the best, he should not have sent mother and child to the village, he is supposed to get them accommodation in a comfortable place, at least for old times sake. That was my point.

The ill!terate you are, didn't care to ask the type of toilet the baby uses and water baby drinks, most infections can be contracted from toilet, water, dirty environment, etc. Provide accommodation for your child/mother, and stop sending people to monitor your ex wife, that's my point, because you don't know if they will speak the truth or not. As a single father, we do not even know if he doing worse than the woman.

i think the only responsibility the man has is 2wards his child this is why the money you pay to ex wife is called child benefit money not Mum benefit money. How much you are told to pay and how much you can afford to pay is a different matter. In some terms you do realize, if the man is remarried and setled and the woman is not the court wil rule for the child to go to a settled home!

Ahniin:
What a mother .
I still insist you guys have a round table talk(I hope the mother isn't scared that once she releases the child to you,her meal ticket is gone)

Chai. . poor baby.

May I know what even led to the divorce?
Was domestic violence involved?

Amebo!

Only those who can see the invincible can do the impossible

Ahniin:
The other bitter sored side of divorce.its now the grass that's suffering it.

Secondly you don't expect the condition of the child to look posh based on they're in the village ravaged with so much crawling insects and the rest,so the child skin must be affected.
It takes a smart n vigilant mum to ensure the child looks healthy n well kept.

3rdly...The mother whoring and keeping multiple sex poachers as partner says alot about her kind of person.

My only painment here is the child paying and contracting these diseases due to the stupidity of both adults she chooses as PARENTS.imagine a toddler of 1year 3 months.

THE SOLUTION.....kindly have a calm heart to heart talks with the mother to allow you care for the child(please don't be harsh with words and don't even make attempts to forcefully take the child n abscond to your base.

Nada must happen to that child,she/he must be priotised

I remember one video I came across online

A top European lawyer was saying that once you divorce with a person
And there are children involved

The two individuals are already screwed for Life

If there were no children involved
Then it's so much better

But once there's children involved

The two parties will still be conjoined by there child or children and there's no escape

Divorce when children are involved is hell and torture

Not surprised the mother has no other means to survive other than prostituting.

Many single mothers Fcvk for money!

That being said, how does a child contact STD? Via breastfeeding or was he sexually molested?
The JUDGE GO SCRATCH HEAD FOR THIS ONE

Smartdoctor:
Good evening guys, please I need an urgent legal advisors in the forum to assist my cousin brother.
He had divorced and sent her wife back to the village for the past six months ago.

But the court asked him to be paying a certain amount of money monthly for the child's wellbeing which he has been doing.

But unfortunately the effect of the money has never been significant by looking at the physical appearance of the child.

He always sends relatives to check on the child of which several reports have reached him about how the boy is always been abandoned to be wandering about alone while the mother will be hanging out with friends.

What strucked him to his nerves was the recent report about the child been seriously sick and rumours that the mother now deals with several sexual partners while still breastfeeding the child....
He travelled from Abuja immediately to his hometown to retrieve the boy via court order but unfortunately the court denied him because the baby is believed to be too young at 1 year and 3 months old.

Now that the court had adjourned the case till 28th this month, he however decided to stay put in his hometown to treat the baby. The baby was taken to the hospital. the doctor took off his clothes and to our greatest suprise, the child's body looks so rough, rashes and boils all over her armpit down to his genital region.

Laboratory test was carried out and the report showed that the child have sexually transmitted infections. Fungi infection (,jock itch) and candidiasis.

All these evidences have been push to the judge phone and what we are afraid of, is the possibility of the judge cautioning her to take care of the child and allow her to continue taking the child's custody.
Can he take the child forcefully after having all these evidences against the mother?

These are things folks needs to considered before divorce. How do you divorce a wife with a children less than a year old? Regardless of her offense, there's a separation period which they should have seek pending divorce.

No court will ever grant the custody of the child at that age to the father. Now that they've involved court, there's no way he can take the child forcely. The best option is for him to get closer to the child location or visit there weekly.

Smartdoctor:
Good evening guys, please I need an urgent legal advisors in the forum to assist my cousin brother.
He had divorced and sent her wife back to the village for the past six months ago.

But the court asked him to be paying a certain amount of money monthly for the child's wellbeing which he has been doing.

But unfortunately the effect of the money has never been significant by looking at the physical appearance of the child.

He always sends relatives to check on the child of which several reports have reached him about how the boy is always been abandoned to be wandering about alone while the mother will be hanging out with friends.

What strucked him to his nerves was the recent report about the child been seriously sick and rumours that the mother now deals with several sexual partners while still breastfeeding the child....
He travelled from Abuja immediately to his hometown to retrieve the boy via court order but unfortunately the court denied him because the baby is believed to be too young at 1 year and 3 months old.

Now that the court had adjourned the case till 28th this month, he however decided to stay put in his hometown to treat the baby. The baby was taken to the hospital. the doctor took off his clothes and to our greatest suprise, the child's body looks so rough, rashes and boils all over her armpit down to his genital region.

Laboratory test was carried out and the report showed that the child have sexually transmitted infections. Fungi infection (,jock itch) and candidiasis.

All these evidences have been push to the judge phone and what we are afraid of, is the possibility of the judge cautioning her to take care of the child and allow her to continue taking the child's custody.
Can he take the child forcefully after having all these evidences against the mother?

You need a lawyer that's familiar with these kinda issues, it's hard for a court to take a child from his/her mum even if the child is grown..
..
Your lawyer need to get a Pediatrician who can state under oat that it's very risky for the child to continue living the way he/she and advise a change of environment ...
Do this with a pediatrician from a Teaching Hospital...
..
Leave the rest to your lawyer

The matter was in court, the court passed judgement which was appropriate.
Due to events, you still went to court and d matter is awaiting court verdict at stipulated date.
The Court still has the final say.
No advise from Nairaland can change it.
To tell you the truth, the court will not pass judgement in your favour and allow you to take the child from the mother because the baby is still at tender age.
Worse case scenario will be the court to pass judgement that the child be handed over to Social Welfare Dept if the mother of the child is adjudged to be incapable of keeping the child.
Both ways, you lose !!!

Each time I hear young couples divorcing, what easily comes to my mind is outrightly incompatible people who didn't do the homework well but got carried away by sexual lust that resulted in unwanted pregnancy and forced marriage.
Hasty decisions have serious consequences.
Marriage is not child's play