₦airaland Forum

ScotHarvath:
Sex is another issue, I always have to beg for it and when I raised the issue in anger she said I can be going to get it from other girls.

I really don’t think most Nigerian girls deserve or want a cool headed man. They will show you shege.

Thinking back and seeing only the things I did I can only can myself a fool. Helping with the chores, helping with the kids, revealing everything about my finances to her, standing up to her family for once admonishing her, spending too much time with her and trying to make her my everything.


Friends have taught me a lot in this life which I why I chose to avoid friends and focus on my wife and family but this woman is making those same guys I abandoned for her call me a fool.


If there’s an altercation, she turns on off the TV and sound system so the neighbors can hear everything.


Is it wrong to be a good man and want your wife to be your best friend.

If this marriage finally fails, the next woman I will date will see another version of me

So, should we shower encomiums on you for doing the right thing? Are you not supposed to be helping her out or did you marry a slave?

Diamond1605:
Tell him to tell you the real truth
That all I will say

Which truth? Same thing happening with me my woman said she hates me and the kids she is always bitter and angry 😡 no laughing


Please if you know more about the story say something

Some women are like that, having known husband not having concubine or 2nd wife, they themselves, would become rival to the husband.

One man's food is another man's poison, here I am wishing and hoping my husband will spend some time with me at home and help with some chores and our baby na em another woman dey do anyhow.

Give her space and silent treatment, she go regret, focus more on the kids and ignore her as if she doesn't exist.

Namaster:
"She even said recently in a fight that I disgust her and she hated me."

That's a NEW dick speaking through your wife. You wife started tasting a new dick a couple of months ago and that's when it started.

She only asked you to stay because the new dick knows she's a LovePeddler and will not have anything serious with her. He'll fuuuck the shit out of her, though.

The fact that you stayed after being told to your face that you are no different from FAECES to her shows you have ZERO respect for yourself.

You have NO boundaries. So get ready for MORE. She'll start BEATING you soon.

You are the WET dream of abusive whores—an introvert with LOW self-esteem who'll SWEEP the house while a bitch is in bed SLEEPING till 10 o' clock. If you have a little money, your LovePeddler has hit the jackpot.

You'll NOT listen but I'll tell you anyway:

Get a DNA test for both kids. Then KICK her out. No matter the results of the DNA tests, KICK HER OUT.

He won't listen. He's a simp.

RPG2020:
Same thing happening with me my woman said she hates me and the kids. She is always bitter no laughing no playing with the kids always angry 😡 I'm down I'm feeling for the kids we both don't deserve them when their is problem first thing she does is to carry knife 🗡️

When we tell una say marriage counseling is a way to help open communication channels when they seem to have closed up to you in marriage, una no go hear word. Something is wrong somewhere and from your comment, either you are in denial of it or you simply are ignorant of what the real problem in your marriage is. It is time to call on the aid of a professional marriage counselor.... not a bloody pastor man or alfa! Both of you should open up and see where it goes from there.

How does this rubbish concern us?

Afodot0022:
OP, TBH, you need to trash this issues on time cos it will not get better. women don't appreciate good husband, only few that have sense does, For that woman to say such words to you, she meant it and i can assure you, that your marriage will not last and will crash anytime soon. At times as a man , show some craze at home, let her know that you self don't care if the marriage crashes, she has already study you well and know your weak point to the fact that you don't want the marriage to end reason why she is displaying all this nonsense. make sure you separate from her and don't give a damn, though it will be hard but do so cos that is the only thing that can reset her brain, the economy is enough to reset her brain by the time she start taking responsibility of her and the kids, that is when she will recognize your value better, if she truly value the marriage , she will ensure you guys reconcile and if everything end, bros move on and enjoy your life. very soon she will start cheating on you even if she has not started, women always believe the grass is greener at the other side until they experience it and find out that its not so. let her learn her lesson in a bitter way. A woman you are caring and taking responsibility for will still be stressing your life, if you don't take action now, na HBP go kill you and that woman will move to the next simp man.

My woman told me same thing.she said i you and the kids she is always bitter and angry 😡 any problem first thing she will carry knife 🗡️

Propose to marry a second wife ASAP. Forget what anyone says. Bring in a competitor and lessen the attention given to her. Either she stays or leaves. Either way, you win.

Terms and conditions apply!

RPG2020:
■ My woman told me same thing.she said i you and the kids she is always bitter and angry 😡 any problem first thing she will carry knife 🗡️

She carry knife and you remain with her? This one wey you dey complain of her upandan, you sure say the problem comes only from here cause something tells me you need help yourself.

Kobojunkie:
When we tell una say marriage counseling is a way to help open communication channels when they seem to have closed up to you in marriage, una no go hear word. Something is wrong somewhere and from your comment, either you are in denial of it or you simply are ignorant of what the real problem in your marriage is. It is time to call on the aid of a professional marriage counselor.... not a bloody pastor man or alfa! Both of you should open up and see where it goes from there.

I'm down brother people warned me when we were dating but i didn't listen everyday i cried

African proverb says that when your dog starts barking at you that dog is being fed by another person.

The above proverb has nothing to do with dogs 🐕

Kobojunkie:
She carry knife and you remain with her? This one wey you dey complain of her upandan, you sure say the problem comes only from here cause something tells me you help yourself.

Yes i need help I'm down

RPG2020:
■ I'm down brother people warned me when we were dating but i didn't listen everyday i cried

Just because you were blind to it while you were dating her is no reason why you should not get help when it becomes too hard to bear. Go get professional marriage counseling abeg and leave the house if she is indeed violent as you claim. Posting all these negative comments without doing anything to help yourself... sounds to me like what depression would do to an individual. Get help and improve the quality of your own life while at it.

ScotHarvath:
I have been noticing this things for the past couple of months. She even said recently in a fight that I disgust her and she hated me, I wanted to call for a separation after hearing such strong words but she pleaded and I acquiesced.

We have two kids.

Yesterday which was Father’s Day, she woke up at 10 o clock, before she did, I had slept the house and prepared breakfast because I felt she needed to rest.


I went out to with my friends around 6pm and came back around 10pm and asked her to help make toast for dinner and she boldly told me to go the kitchen and make it myself.

I really blame myself for this situation now, I made myself to accessible to all. I barely keep friends. So I made her my best friend, tell her everything about my finances and all. I treat her as an equal.


Is it wrong to treat a Nigerian woman well this days?


Everybody is advising me to get a side chick but I’m not that kind of man, I’m not sneaky or crafty enough to maintain two relationships.

I have been told to stop spending time with her at home but I’m an introvert, I don’t like frolicking with other people unless it’s absolutely necessary and besides I work from home.

I have also been advised to treat her like a stranger in her house and not talk to her for days but once again I don’t want that kind of life. I feel truly trapp

You have been told to do so so many things but, but, but you don't, you don't. She is finishing you but you keep don'ting. Sorry. You better distance yourself for a while, work on yourself and see how things go. I understand you don't want to lose your marriage but it should be a mutual thing. You better not let her poison your food one day just because you don't want to lose your marriage. Or would you rather lose your life.

Check well! She may be cheating on you already bro.

Namaster:
"She even said recently in a fight that I disgust her and she hated me."

That's a NEW dick speaking through your wife. You wife started tasting a new dick a couple of months ago and that's when it started.

She only asked you to stay because the new dick knows she's a LovePeddler and will not have anything serious with her. He'll fuuuck the shit out of her, though.

The fact that you stayed after being told to your face that you are no different from FAECES to her shows you have ZERO respect for yourself.

You have NO boundaries. So get ready for MORE. She'll start BEATING you soon.

You are the WET dream of abusive whores—an introvert with LOW self-esteem who'll SWEEP the house while a bitch is in bed SLEEPING till 10 o' clock. If you have a little money, your LovePeddler has hit the jackpot.

You'll NOT listen but I'll tell you anyway:

Get a DNA test for both kids. Then KICK her out. No matter the results of the DNA tests, KICK HER OUT.

You're obviously not a married man and or you're too immature to understand marriage 🤷🏾 and family life Sir

Don't be a tool for the devil in wrecking people's homes. Your vituperations smacks of bitterness, bile, heartlessness, low self-esteem and someone from a faulty upbringing

ViceGovernor:
African proverb says that when your dog starts barking at you that dog is being fed by another person. The above proverb has nothing to do with dogs 🐕

That is a silly proverb.

Namaster:
"She even said recently in a fight that I disgust her and she hated me."

That's a NEW dick speaking through your wife. You wife started tasting a new dick a couple of months ago and that's when it started.

She only asked you to stay because the new dick knows she's a LovePeddler and will not have anything serious with her. He'll fuuuck the shit out of her, though.

The fact that you stayed after being told to your face that you are no different from FAECES to her shows you have ZERO respect for yourself.

You have NO boundaries. So get ready for MORE. She'll start BEATING you soon.

You are the WET dream of abusive whores—an introvert with LOW self-esteem who'll SWEEP the house while a bitch is in bed SLEEPING till 10 o' clock. If you have a little money, your LovePeddler has hit the jackpot.

You'll NOT listen but I'll tell you anyway:

Get a DNA test for both kids. Then KICK her out. No matter the results of the DNA tests, KICK HER OUT.

You're obviously not a married man and or you're too immature to understand marriage 🤷🏾 and family life Sir

Don't be a tool for the devil in wrecking people's homes. Your vituperations smacks of bitterness, bile, heartlessness, low self-esteem and someone from a faulty upbringing

ScotHarvath:
I have been noticing this things for the past couple of months. She even said recently in a fight that I disgust her and she hated me, I wanted to call for a separation after hearing such strong words but she pleaded and I acquiesced.

We have two kids.

Yesterday which was Father’s Day, she woke up at 10 o clock, before she did, I had slept the house and prepared breakfast because I felt she needed to rest.


I went out to with my friends around 6pm and came back around 10pm and asked her to help make toast for dinner and she boldly told me to go the kitchen and make it myself.

I really blame myself for this situation now, I made myself to accessible to all. I barely keep friends. So I made her my best friend, tell her everything about my finances and all. I treat her as an equal.


Is it wrong to treat a Nigerian woman well this days?


Everybody is advising me to get a side chick but I’m not that kind of man, I’m not sneaky or crafty enough to maintain two relationships.

I have been told to stop spending time with her at home but I’m an introvert, I don’t like frolicking with other people unless it’s absolutely necessary and besides I work from home.

I have also been advised to treat her like a stranger in her house and not talk to her for days but once again I don’t want that kind of life. I feel truly trapped.

/
Go to women’s forum.
Listen to everything women say they desire in a man…then be the opposite.

/

ScotHarvath:
Sex is another issue, I always have to beg for it and when I raised the issue in anger she said I can be going to get it from other girls.

I really don’t think most Nigerian girls deserve or want a cool headed man. They will show you shege.

Thinking back and seeing only the things I did I can only can myself a fool. Helping with the chores, helping with the kids, revealing everything about my finances to her, standing up to her family for once admonishing her, spending too much time with her and trying to make her my everything.


Friends have taught me a lot in this life which I why I chose to avoid friends and focus on my wife and family but this woman is making those same guys I abandoned for her call me a fool.


If there’s an altercation, she turns on off the TV and sound system so the neighbors can hear everything.


Is it wrong to be a good man and want your wife to be your best friend.

If this marriage finally fails, the next woman I will date will see another version of me

Here is my advice. She's definitely under a manipulation. I'm sure of this. There are forces that doesn't want any good thing to work. This is exactly what you should do, Don't stop showing her love or helping her. That's what the enemies want. Rather, start prayer for her while showing her love. Remember love conquers all... Love is patient.. She's the bone of your bone, you can't give up so easily. Hit me up for more prayers and advice...

Namaster:
"She even said recently in a fight that I disgust her and she hated me."

That's a NEW dick speaking through your wife. You wife started tasting a new dick a couple of months ago and that's when it started.

She only asked you to stay because the new dick knows she's a LovePeddler and will not have anything serious with her. He'll fuuuck the shit out of her, though.

The fact that you stayed after being told to your face that you are no different from FAECES to her shows you have ZERO respect for yourself.

You have NO boundaries. So get ready for MORE. She'll start BEATING you soon.

You are the WET dream of abusive whores—an introvert with LOW self-esteem who'll SWEEP the house while a bitch is in bed SLEEPING till 10 o' clock. If you have a little money, your LovePeddler has hit the jackpot.

You'll NOT listen but I'll tell you anyway:

Get a DNA test for both kids. Then KICK her out. No matter the results of the DNA tests, KICK HER OUT.

This is the best comment I've ever read on nairaland. This is very accurate because I'm a living witness. Well, now I'm whole because I did the needful. Kick her out,trust me, any other method will only prolong the issues.

ScotHarvath:
I have been noticing this things for the past couple of months. She even said recently in a fight that I disgust her and she hated me, I wanted to call for a separation after hearing such strong words but she pleaded and I acquiesced.

We have two kids.

Yesterday which was Father’s Day, she woke up at 10 o clock, before she did, I had slept the house and prepared breakfast because I felt she needed to rest.


I went out to with my friends around 6pm and came back around 10pm and asked her to help make toast for dinner and she boldly told me to go the kitchen and make it myself.

I really blame myself for this situation now, I made myself to accessible to all. I barely keep friends. So I made her my best friend, tell her everything about my finances and all. I treat her as an equal.


Is it wrong to treat a Nigerian woman well this days?


Everybody is advising me to get a side chick but I’m not that kind of man, I’m not sneaky or crafty enough to maintain two relationships.

I have been told to stop spending time with her at home but I’m an introvert, I don’t like frolicking with other people unless it’s absolutely necessary and besides I work from home.

I have also been advised to treat her like a stranger in her house and not talk to her for days but once again I don’t want that kind of life. I feel truly trapped.

yea, you def caused it.

Good you've identified that. However, it's not too late to set down boundaries, that is if you've got the balls to do it....and I'm not talking about shouting or violence but psychologically. YES, you def have to change towards her, you certainly need to change things, and that includes the way you relate and react to her. You need to create mystery, you don't want to be the person whose wife has him all figured out.

First step is to treat yourself as the prize, and not the footmat and I have a feeling you would be able to redirect course from there. You typed this like someone who has identified all the problems already, so use your head to nip this in the bud asap.

In addition, if you have any suspicions, investigate!

You can't use evil to pay evil, that's what the world system does. I dare you to make a difference. When she comes to herself, she'll forever adore you.

cococandy:
A good man will always be good man. I agree

We just don’t know what OP is.

The way you're everywhere, commenting and following this matter with so much passion. Are you sure you're not the wife?

Pls treat him well oo and give him kpekus

I was once in your situation. I told my wife about my finances but when she messed up, I keep all my financial details from her.

Do the needful

Diamond1605:
Lies lies you won’t say how you beat her like a drum, you won’t say how you cheated more than 8 times with 8 different women.

You won’t say how you always insult her and her family.

You won’t say how you step on her while beating her.

You won’t say how you made her feel like she is not a human

Those your friends advising you will definitely lead you astray

Come out and say the full story
Coward

Madam don't talk about your husband like that.

cococandy:
A good man will always be good man. I agree

We just don’t know what OP is.

Some of you just talk without giving thoughts to your words first 🤦‍♂️

You don’t know what OP is, yet, you’ve been all over the thread lambasting and accusing him of being sinister?

Are you sure everything is okay? Because I don’t understand how you can contradict yourself by jumping into conclusions whilst still admitting you don’t know for sure his aim for this thread?

Don’t bother replying, have a nice day!

ScotHarvath:
I have been noticing this things for the past couple of months. She even said recently in a fight that I disgust her and she hated me, I wanted to call for a separation after hearing such strong words but she pleaded and I acquiesced.

We have two kids.

Yesterday which was Father’s Day, she woke up at 10 o clock, before she did, I had slept the house and prepared breakfast because I felt she needed to rest.


I went out to with my friends around 6pm and came back around 10pm and asked her to help make toast for dinner and she boldly told me to go the kitchen and make it myself.

I really blame myself for this situation now, I made myself to accessible to all. I barely keep friends. So I made her my best friend, tell her everything about my finances and all. I treat her as an equal.


Is it wrong to treat a Nigerian woman well this days?


Everybody is advising me to get a side chick but I’m not that kind of man, I’m not sneaky or crafty enough to maintain two relationships.

I have been told to stop spending time with her at home but I’m an introvert, I don’t like frolicking with other people unless it’s absolutely necessary and besides I work from home.

I have also been advised to treat her like a stranger in her house and not talk to her for days but once again I don’t want that kind of life. I feel truly trapped.

It it's true

Her heart is hardened
Please leave , heal and move on with your life
Still be kind to her and let her know the reason you're leaving..
But leave and don't hate her
Forgive her and move on with your life
You'll be fine

Lordsonn:
I was once in your situation. I told my wife about my finances but when she messed up, I keep all my financial details from her.

Do the needful

That mean it's not advisable to discuss finance with a woman..

I sense so, reason if a guy/man lose his job, misbehaviour from the woman will start.

Whether the story is true or not. Nobody will believe you because it's sounds too good to be true.
Exactly the same thing happened to me and nobody believed I was punished for being too good. People will always think you did something wrong.

Women don't like it when you make them your everything. Always have friends and family you enjoy life with.
Have other things going on in your life that she's not part of. They find you more attractive that way.

Concerning this your situation. There's nothing you can do about it. She can never want you genuinely again no matter what you do, or how you choose to protest.
Your main mistake is making her your everything and being so domestic. Two attributes that makes a man unattractive the most.

I'm not sure I would love to marry a Nigerian girl, I will rather go to Zambia or ,Kenya to pick a wife. Majority of Nigerians girls are oloshos, even in marriage.