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How Do I Handle This Unapologetic Woman - Romance (2) - Nairaland

Nairaland ForumNairaland GeneralRomanceHow Do I Handle This Unapologetic Woman (3587 Views)

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Re: How Do I Handle This Unapologetic Woman by MrBrownJay1(m): 4:44pm On Aug 23, 2024
jorion:
Bro, they only do that when they don't care about or have little emotional attachment to the dude. I have been there, we know them wella.
of course she doesnt care about the dude... and this wont change whether you give her the best sex on earth (or not)
Re: How Do I Handle This Unapologetic Woman by AffiliateGuruNG(m): 4:45pm On Aug 23, 2024
JessicaRabbit:
You're planning to spend the rest of your life with someone who refuses to apologize or show vulnerability? That's a recipe for disaster my dear. You can't possibly accept this kind of behavior from her. She sounds like a walking red flag to me, and you sound like someone being subdued. It's not even about being right or wrong. Two crucial pillars in any relationship is empathy and respect and she doesn't seem to embody either of the two.



I like the your way with words. It's awesome.


But all of that is neither here nor there. What you can control right now is how you respond to the situation. Continuing to absorb her behavior and always being the one to apologize will indeed weaken you much more than it already has. You can't fix her ego or force her to apologize.

It's time to reevaluate this relationship and consider whether this is the kind of dynamic you want in a partner. You need to ask yourself if you are willing to tolerate this behavior for the rest of your life. Are you certain this pattern of behaviors will not erode your self-respect and mental health?

Don't write checks you cannot cash my dear. If you'd like, maybe you can call her aside and tell her how you really feel. But if it still doesn't feel right for your mental health, I'd advise you to cut your losses and dip.
Re: How Do I Handle This Unapologetic Woman by jorion(m): 4:48pm On Aug 23, 2024
MrBrownJay1:
of course she doesnt care about the dude... and this wont change whether you give her the best sex on earth (or not)
Very true. If he couldn't tame her before, he definitely won't be able to now.
Re: How Do I Handle This Unapologetic Woman by Bliztzer: 4:58pm On Aug 23, 2024
davinchi101:
I seriously need your advice on this issue. I'm a guy of 31yrs, and my girlfriend is 29.

She's a very religious and strict lady, and she has the features of a good wife.

The issue I'm currently having with her is that whenever she does or says something against me that I don't like, she will never accept her errors and apologize. She will always stand her ground that she didn't offend me, and can't say sorry.

Often times, I get angry and refuse to talk to her for days, and she won't also make attempt to call or resolve the matter until I later reach out to her for peace. it's really weakening me as a man to always be the one apologizing even when I'm the one being offended.

Last week, while we were on call, she ended the call abruptly on me which really got me pissed off. She claimed it was because I was singing while on the call, and was not listening to what she was saying. This is not really true because we've talked for almost an hour, and at a point their was silence and I was just singing hymns.

When I reached out to her about how offended I was about her action, all I expected was a sorry, rather, she was claiming her right on how she has not offended me.

From that last week up till today, iv not called her, and she hasn't reached out to me for peace. This is a woman we're already making plans on having our wedding by next year.

My main issue with her is the ego, and never ready to apologize unless she feels she's wrong.

I'm seriously tired of all these and I think sorry should be the easiest thing to say for both a man and a woman. I really need your advice.
You never marry her, quit before you go regret am. What you are seeing is "pride" with capital P.
Re: How Do I Handle This Unapologetic Woman by Nicepoker(m): 5:00pm On Aug 23, 2024
Give her belly then run grin.
Re: How Do I Handle This Unapologetic Woman by pansophist(m):
Women find it hard to respect men that are closer to them in age. If you're also the same height or/and she is plus size, the worse for you.

When women say they want tall and muscular men, they mean it. They want to feel small, and you must honor that wish.

She has probably dated, nacked, and rolled with men way older and smoother than you. You're an appendix or last resort. She no rate you, even though you want comot her from the street

Better leave her and find someone younger, let the older men with thick beards match up with her. At your age, any lady above 25 years is old.
Re: How Do I Handle This Unapologetic Woman by pansophist(m): 5:23pm On Aug 23, 2024
EreluRoz:
It's not green anywhere please manage her like that afterall you'll still cheat on her after marriage.
Wey my bottle sef
Re: How Do I Handle This Unapologetic Woman by pansophist(m): 5:26pm On Aug 23, 2024
So after this her dirty behavior, you want to take her to the alter and tell God that from all the women in this world, she is the good things that you found?

You get mind o grin
Re: How Do I Handle This Unapologetic Woman by EreluRoz: 5:27pm On Aug 23, 2024
pansophist:
Wey my bottle sef
😆 didn't you say we should learn to choose our poison in most of your write-up? He should accept his poison and live with it. There's no perfect person anywhere
Re: How Do I Handle This Unapologetic Woman by pansophist(m): 5:30pm On Aug 23, 2024
It baffles me how your masculinity could tolerate her madness for long, to a point she grew wings and assured you'll always crawled back.

Being a man means you're so capable of extreme degree of evil and pettiness, and your kindness is an action, not the default.

Women like your babe are smart sha. They go for men they can do this nonsense with.
Re: How Do I Handle This Unapologetic Woman by pansophist(m): 5:32pm On Aug 23, 2024
EreluRoz:
😆 didn't you say we should learn to choose our poison in most of your write-up? He should accept his poison and live with it. There's no perfect person anywhere
Not the same thing o.

Choosing your poison are in situations that are irreconcilable. This one is a behavioral and foundational issue that can be resolved but the babe no send.

Relationship is very easy, just do it with someone that equally wants you.
Re: How Do I Handle This Unapologetic Woman by ugwumichael(m): 6:15pm On Aug 23, 2024
The worst person to give advice is a man in love
Re: How Do I Handle This Unapologetic Woman by Karleb(m): 6:28pm On Aug 23, 2024
E no get wetin we wan tell you wey you go hear.

But brother! I and the boys thank you for taking another toxic woman off the street.

Your sacrifice will not go in vain! cool angry
Re: How Do I Handle This Unapologetic Woman by Nazgul:
My dear op, you're dating yourself.

If you know what's best for you, start looking for someone else who would respect you and feel remorseful whenever she's aware that she has offended you.
Re: How Do I Handle This Unapologetic Woman by azidomedogo: 7:20pm On Aug 23, 2024
Same red flag I saw in my relationship before getting married. Now it’s hunting me. Mine just doesn’t apologize for anything .

My advice is that you quit the relationship else if you proceed with the marriage she will keep denying you of your rights as a husband.
Re: How Do I Handle This Unapologetic Woman by henrybomb(m): 7:36pm On Aug 23, 2024
davinchi101:
I seriously need your advice on this issue. I'm a guy of 31yrs, and my girlfriend is 29.

She's a very religious and strict lady, and she has the features of a good wife.

The issue I'm currently having with her is that whenever she does or says something against me that I don't like, she will never accept her errors and apologize. She will always stand her ground that she didn't offend me, and can't say sorry.

Often times, I get angry and refuse to talk to her for days, and she won't also make attempt to call or resolve the matter until I later reach out to her for peace. it's really weakening me as a man to always be the one apologizing even when I'm the one being offended.

Last week, while we were on call, she ended the call abruptly on me which really got me pissed off. She claimed it was because I was singing while on the call, and was not listening to what she was saying. This is not really true because we've talked for almost an hour, and at a point their was silence and I was just singing hymns.

When I reached out to her about how offended I was about her action, all I expected was a sorry, rather, she was claiming her right on how she has not offended me.

From that last week up till today, iv not called her, and she hasn't reached out to me for peace. This is a woman we're already making plans on having our wedding by next year.

My main issue with her is the ego, and never ready to apologize unless she feels she's wrong.

I'm seriously tired of all these and I think sorry should be the easiest thing to say for both a man and a woman. I really need your advice.
Let her go is all I will tell you.
I have been in this shit before and I can tell you for free that she wont change unless she decides to..very soon she will start gaslighting you.
Re: How Do I Handle This Unapologetic Woman by jorion(m): 7:48pm On Aug 23, 2024
Karleb:
E no get wetin we wan tell you wey you go hear.

But brother! I and the boys thank you for taking another toxic woman off the street.

Your sacrifice will not go in vain! cool angry
cheesy cheesy cheesy cheesy cheesy cheesy cheesy cheesy cheesy cheesy cheesy cheesy cheesy

He is doing the brotherhood a great service.
Re: How Do I Handle This Unapologetic Woman by jorion(m): 7:49pm On Aug 23, 2024
azidomedogo:
Same red flag I saw in my relationship before getting married. Now it’s hunting me. Mine just doesn’t apologize for anything .

My advice is that you quit the relationship else if you proceed with the marriage she will keep denying you of your rights as a husband.
Yoooohhhh. Even after marrying her grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin
Re: How Do I Handle This Unapologetic Woman by femi4: 7:59pm On Aug 23, 2024
davinchi101:
I seriously need your advice on this issue. I'm a guy of 31yrs, and my girlfriend is 29.

She's a very religious and strict lady, and she has the features of a good wife.

The issue I'm currently having with her is that whenever she does or says something against me that I don't like, she will never accept her errors and apologize. She will always stand her ground that she didn't offend me, and can't say sorry.

Often times, I get angry and refuse to talk to her for days, and she won't also make attempt to call or resolve the matter until I later reach out to her for peace. it's really weakening me as a man to always be the one apologizing even when I'm the one being offended.

Last week, while we were on call, she ended the call abruptly on me which really got me pissed off. She claimed it was because I was singing while on the call, and was not listening to what she was saying. This is not really true because we've talked for almost an hour, and at a point their was silence and I was just singing hymns.

When I reached out to her about how offended I was about her action, all I expected was a sorry, rather, she was claiming her right on how she has not offended me.

From that last week up till today, iv not called her, and she hasn't reached out to me for peace. This is a woman we're already making plans on having our wedding by next year.

My main issue with her is the ego, and never ready to apologize unless she feels she's wrong.

I'm seriously tired of all these and I think sorry should be the easiest thing to say for both a man and a woman. I really need your advice.
In marriage, it's all about forgiveness and not who's right or wrong.

2. Respect is earned not demanded. If you don't demand for it, until you earn it, you won't get it by force.

3. Give room for communication even when she hurts you. Malice destroys relationships if it continues for days
Re: How Do I Handle This Unapologetic Woman by Lording123(m): 8:16pm On Aug 23, 2024
jorion:
Bro, they only do that when they don't care about or have little emotional attachment to the dude. I have been there, we know them wella.
I enjoyed both of your arguments. MrBrownJay1 speaks of character while you speak of emotional attachment. Both of you are spot on.

OP’s girlfriend has avoidant attachment. In that case, it’s a battle between her avoidant nature (which is responsible for the narcissistic behavior) and how attached she is to the OP. And as it is, her avoidant nature clearly wins. OP most likely won’t be fulfilled in a marriage with her. The ball is in his court.

My advice is always simple: decide what’s best for you.
Re: How Do I Handle This Unapologetic Woman by Pilopher: 8:19pm On Aug 23, 2024
DiskJokeyManic:
1st paragraph
- how can u as a 31 yrs old be dating a 29 year old woman? Hw she wan take respect U when the age bracket no much??🫤 Abi U no know say she senior u in every other aspects of life aside age?? The grade u should go for are those 19 to 25 while her grade are those men in their 40-50s upward

2nd paragraph
- Being Religious does not mean u wil make a good wife! Religious nd strict lady with a “feature of a good wife“ you claim she has that finds it hard to say ""Sorry"" when wrong? U re seeing the red flags now oo!!

3rd paragraph
- oga this is a very big red flag. RUN!

4th paragraph
- oga, it is either u are a simp, weak man or that lady already knows ur mumu button. She knows u love her more than she does, and trust me, this is just the beginning. You never begin apologize sef.

5th paragraph
- notin I hate for dis life like woman hang call on me when na me call u. That is one height of disrespect u can give me as a woman

6th paragraph
- Red flag! Red flag!! Red flag!!!

7th paragraph
- oga, if u go on to marry dis lady, u wil surely regret it, I bet u. A broken relationship is beta than a broken marriage. End everything nd move on with ur life

8th paragraph
- you never marry her dey complain like dis, what if una later come carry?

9th paragraph
- oga all I can tell u is, that ur woman will never change, not now, not when u two get married. Don't think she will change after marriage! Don't ignore any red flag u see now, if you do, then in few months/years time, we will still be here to read about ur marital issues.

Bye
Drop your number make I do you small card, I love the response
Re: How Do I Handle This Unapologetic Woman by Ballzproblem2: 8:31pm On Aug 23, 2024
vincenteger:
I want to hear her own part of the story
That way I'll understand better.

But if really what you said up there is true, my dear it's not too late neither is it a do or die affairs.
For your own piece of mind.
nothing like hear her own part if your partner is finding it hard to apologize if them marry that marriage Will crash.
Re: How Do I Handle This Unapologetic Woman by 4ward4: 8:35pm On Aug 23, 2024
Respect first before love... She doesn't respect and don't see you fit to be respected..
While still in the street, I don't tolerate disrespect and such ladies will never hear from me again definitely not after having my fill.
Maybe you don't know what it means to be a man and the sacrifice that awaits u when u get married.
Go look for a woman whom you command respect from.
It flows Naturally and such woman will love you more , marriage isn't a child's play, most often you give instructions and her respect for you will make her observe them.
Your financial status also play a role in earning respect, as it have always been people get money pass people .
Re: How Do I Handle This Unapologetic Woman by Les: 9:02pm On Aug 23, 2024
vincenteger:
I want to hear her own part of the story
That way I'll understand better.

But if really what you said up there is true, my dear it's not too late neither is it a do or die affairs.
For your own piece of mind.
there's nothing to hear from her, i have dated a lady like that and they are pure narcissists. They have traces of good attributes but below it is a viper's venom and when that relationship ended, i had peace of mind. I have never loved anyone like i love her ever since, yet ending things was the best for me in every way, tho hard.

OP, if you know what is good for you, leave that lady alone, she will poison your peace of mind.
Re: How Do I Handle This Unapologetic Woman by Baronthecelebri(m): 9:12pm On Aug 23, 2024
Foolish man, leave that girl.
Re: How Do I Handle This Unapologetic Woman by mankan2k7(m): 9:29pm On Aug 23, 2024
Run as fast as u can. U are gradually going towards the express. Run, and I say unto u Run SIMple man.
Re: How Do I Handle This Unapologetic Woman by elmagnifico411(m): 10:35pm On Aug 23, 2024
There's nothing handle. Break that shit off!!
Re: How Do I Handle This Unapologetic Woman by Nehyooh(m): 11:31pm On Aug 23, 2024
jorion:
Op, don't bother yourself with this because I can already tell you what is going to happen.
Spoiler: BOTH OF YOU WON'T SPEAK TO EACH OTHER FOR A VERY LONG TIME IF YOU USE THE SILENT TREATMENT grin grin grin grin grin grin
E NO GO WORK AND YOU WILL STILL APOLOGISE TO HER AGAIN grin grin grin grin grin grin
JUST TRY TO TOLERATE HER UNTIL GOD TOUCHES HER HEART.
AT 29 SHE DON SUPPOSE DEY PRETEND TO MELLOW DOWN O.
GOD WILL TOUCH HER HEART, DON'T WORRY cool cool cool cool cool cool cool cool cool
Oga, you just dey cruise cool I feel you grin
Re: How Do I Handle This Unapologetic Woman by Aaaaarghmed(m): 11:47pm On Aug 23, 2024
She behaves like my last serious gf,I ghosted her,the ghosting pain am diee
Re: How Do I Handle This Unapologetic Woman by AndrewTate(m): 11:52pm On Aug 23, 2024
That’s one of the reasons she’s dating at 29…

To think that she’s probably in her best behavior for now because you’re not married yet. This is just a tip of of the iceberg that’ll make you rethink your decisions when you finally get married to her.
Re: How Do I Handle This Unapologetic Woman by onumadu: 12:12am On Aug 24, 2024
For you to even be considering marriage to this type of a woman speaks more about your warped and weak mentality
I hope you are not one of these men that worship women who claim to be religious and not into other men (AKA virgin hunters who worship puccy). undecided
I sense that is why you are taking a boatload of nonsense from this woman. undecided
Better run for your dear life while you still can.
Re: How Do I Handle This Unapologetic Woman by Oturatetuala(m): 3:56am On Aug 24, 2024
Send her away one time
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