₦airaland Forum

Gerrard59:
My pleasure.
Based on the bold, do you mean that Northern Muslim women or their parents don't work or have the interest to work?

What kind of jobs, skilled and semi-skilled, do Northern Christian women partake in?

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Yes, pair with a lady who has something going for her. Na small small people dey build a financial stable home.

They do but the area where I live, you could hardly find younger women like that. Most of them are just waiting for marriage. Although, they make very submissive housewives. But na the financial angle I dey consider since I'm expected to be the one providing for the home and also sponsoring my education.


Northern Christian ladies could be found engaged in any kind of jobs that their counterparts in the south do, wether skilled, semi skilled or unskilled.



All I want is a industrious and loyal lady. Some one who is understanding and could support this dream. Afterall, one the major reason why I'm going back to school to study MBBS is to secure a brighter future for my family that would come from me.

[quote author=Solcampbell post=132041800]I know, bro. And that's what why I'm considering having a kid while in school before getting married. Note, I'm more fascinated in having a child than getting married now A son or a daughter would really serve a big motivation to strive harder to achieve my goals.

I find the idea of waiting after seven years to have a kid quite uncomfortable

So long as the mother of the child have something's doing, no matter how little. I'll be able to contributed my own quota no doubt.


After graduation, we could get married. Afterall, one of the reasons why I'm going back to study medicine is to create a brighter future for the family that would come from me.

The dilemma is that I don't even have a girlfriend whom I should have developed a meaningful relationship with. I don't even have any female friends because I'm deeply introverted.




[/quote no try that thing o

Solcampbell:
I know, bro. And that's what why I'm considering having a kid while in school before getting married. Note, I'm more fascinated in having a child than getting married now A son or a daughter would really serve a big motivation to strive harder to achieve my goals.

I find the idea of waiting after seven years to have a kid quite uncomfortable

So long as the mother of the child have something's doing, no matter how little. I'll be able to contributed my own quota no doubt.


After graduation, we could get married. Afterall, one of the reasons why I'm going back to study medicine is to create a brighter future for the family that would come from me.

The dilemma is that I don't even have a girlfriend whom I should have developed a meaningful relationship with. I don't even have any female friends because I'm deeply introverted.

It'll be easier to find a pin in an haystack than finding a Nigerian lady who would agree to that plan of yours. I wish you good luck in your search sha

Solcampbell:
They do but the area where I live, you could hardly find younger women like that. Most of them are just waiting for marriage. Although, they make very submissive housewives. But na the financial angle I dey consider since I'm expected to be the one providing for the home and also sponsoring my education

Sorry, but I will like to know more about the region's women from both religions.
What about if they don't get married? As the economy is toff, are Muslim men still engaging in polygamy - marrying more wives - as usual? At the bold, younger Muslim women just wait for marriage without actively working, but their older counterparts are already working?

You mentioned "Muslim women not allowed to work". Who prevents them from working, their parents or their husbands?

Northern Christian ladies could be found engaged in any kind of jobs that their counterparts in the south do, wether skilled, semi skilled or unskilled. All I want is a industrious and loyal lady. Some one who is understanding and could support this dream. Afterall, one the major reason why I'm going back to school to study MBBS is to secure a brighter future for my family that would come from me.

Then the best option is to marry a Northern Nigerian Christian lady, especially as you're a "liberal Muslim".

Gerrard59:
Sorry, but I will like to know more about the region's women from both religions.
What about if they don't get married? As the economy is toff, are Muslim men still engaging in polygamy - marrying more wives - as usual? At the bold, younger Muslim women just wait for marriage without actively working, but their older counterparts are already working?

You mentioned "Muslim women not allowed to work". Who prevents them from working, their parents or their husbands?


Then the best option is to marry a Northern Nigerian Christian lady, especially as you're a "liberal Muslim".

Not generally, the northern Muslim women that had a University education would definitely be looking forward to get an employment after graduation. But such type of ladies that completed tertiary education are not very common in my area unless I meet them on social media

And you know the employment situation in the country is very terrible. Hence you would find most of them getting married and settling down as housewives despite their qualifications since they now have a partner financially stable enough to carter for their needs.

Infact a northern Muslim who passed through university and can communicate properly in English some times gets an advantage of attracting a better suitor than the lady who is not educated. Except if the one who didn't go to school is more beautiful.

A typical northern man who marries an educated young lady as his first or second or third wife, would be proud to show her off to his family and even mention her level of education to his friends outside. If the man is well connected or rich enough, he could use his influence to secure a job for her in a federal or state agency within the state.

Almost all my former female course mates during my first degree are now married to financially stable men and they are all first wives. Some are working while others are housewives on the instructions of thier husband who provides everything for them. They all got married within a year or two after graduation

Na we men no just get the opportunity, in addition to the fact that we don't come from
previlege homes.


Boss, here in the north ( Kano) it's quite hard to find a northern Muslim woman who's almost thirty and not yet married, except she's been married before but now a divorcee. Some divorcees gets married again while others...


Generally, northern/Islamic marriages are very simple. Even in this economy, you can still prepare your wedding with a sum of 200k to 500k including bride price. The ladies just want to get married and thier parents can't wait to give them out to you so long they see you as a responsible person. Infact in many cases, the bride's parents would even sponsor the wedding altogether.

And accommodation in the inner cities is very cheap, if you are unable to build your own house, you could get a house of three rooms, kitchen and bathroom and a shop for around 100k to 150k, good and neat houses just for you and your wife and the children you will born. Even if they put them up for sale, it wouldn't cost more than 2m to 3m.

They'll never rent or sell such houses to a single guy because they don't trust him not to secretly bring women into the house for fornication. Some will even think you will spoil the small girls in the neighborhood. Needless to say, northern Muslim women marry with thier virginity still intact, except for the divorcees.

Even though you offer to pay them 10m, they
will never rent or sell the house to you. Unless you would sign an agreement that you wouldn't be staying there until you finally get
married.


And that's why I'm still living in my parents house at almost thirty years. You would hardly see even a single room for rent here.

Unless I want to go get accommodation in the
GRA or more liberal areas ( the places where southerners live in Kano). Houses there are as expensive as the type down south and the cost of food and goods are as expensive. And I can't afford that kind of life for now.


And yes, northern men still dey build houses and marry multiple wives in this economy.

Solcampbell:
Not generally, the northern Muslim women that had a University education would definitely be looking forward to get an employment after graduation. But such type of ladies that completed tertiary education are not very common in my area unless I meet them on social media. And you know the employment situation in the country is very terrible. Hence you would find most of them getting married and settling down as housewives despite their qualifications since they now have a partner financially stable enough to carter for their needs.

This is what you should do: suspend any relationship plans for now and get started in medical school. As a matured student, you don't have time to waste on non-essential things. While in school, especially the first three years, improve your medical education and sources of sustenance. Afterwards, you can begin your search for a wife, and you will find loads of them since you are in an academic environment. In fact, you will be spoilt for choices since you are on the path of being a medical doctor. No rush these things. Once a man is financially stable,
na dem dey rush am.

Your financial stability as a man is very important. That is what you should focus on.

Infact a northern Muslim who passed through university and can communicate properly in English some times gets an advantage of attracting a better suitor than the lady who is not educated. Except if the one who didn't go to school is more beautiful. A typical northern man who marries an educated young lady as his first or second or third wife, would be proud to show her off to his family and even mention her level of education to his friends outside. If the man is well connected or rich enough, he could use his influence to secure a job for her in a federal or state agency within the state. Almost all my former female course mates during my first degree are now married to financially stable men and they are all first wives. Some are working while others are housewives on the instructions of thier husband who provides everything for them. They all got married within a year or two after graduation

Interesting to note. Not surprised as I have stated elsewhere on Nairaland that the region's culture and religion influences the way of life.

Boss, here in the north ( Kano) it's quite hard to find a northern Muslim woman who's almost thirty and not yet married, except she's been married before but now a divorcee. Some divorcees gets married again while others...

More interesting. As I have stated above and previously, target the Christians when in school. I am sure Christians attend Bayero and ABU (you probably got into one).

Generally, northern/Islamic marriages are very simple. Even in this economy, you can still prepare your wedding with a sum of 200k to 500k including bride price. The ladies just want to get married and thier parents can't wait to give them out to you so long they see you as a responsible person. Infact in many cases, the bride's parents would even sponsor the wedding altogether.

You see this revelation? It is the reason whenever people on social media lament about "Nigerian women", I beg to disagree because I know Northern Nigeria is very different. So, the online claim that Nigerian women are this and that does not hold to me.

And accommodation in the inner cities is very cheap, if you are unable to build your own house, you could get a house of three rooms, kitchen and bathroom and a shop for around 100k to 150k, good and neat houses just for you and your wife and the children you will born. Even if they put them up for sale, it wouldn't cost more than 2m to 3m.

While the cost of living is low, salaries are lower compared to the south. Am I wrong? Generally, the cost of living is lower in the north and I once envisaged living in the north, especially in Christian communities, but the insecurity situation under Buhari especially related to agribusiness was so terrible. If not for the insecurity and intolerance, many people from the south would love to reside there instead of living in certain Francophone countries. Not many people can survive in the hypercompetitive south, so the north would have been a much better option for them.

They'll never rent or sell such houses to a single guy because they don't trust him not to secretly bring women into the house for fornication. Some will even think you will spoil the small girls in the neighborhood. Needless to say, northern Muslim women marry with thier virginity still intact, except for the divorcees.

Again, men create the society, while women integrate into it. I stated the same here: https://www.nairaland.com/7684230/how-reduce-hook-ups-nigeria#123051795
Does the concept of virginity apply in large numbers to Northern Christian women?

Even though you offer to pay them 10m, they
will never rent or sell the house to you. Unless you would sign an agreement that you wouldn't be staying there until you finally get
married. And that's why I'm still living in my parents house at almost thirty years. You would hardly see even a single room for rent here.

Interesting to note. Seems Islam is not really compatible with capitalism unless there exists a clear divide between the Muslim natives and non-Muslims (Malaysia and the UAE are good examples).

Unless I want to go get accommodation in the
GRA or more liberal areas ( the places where southerners live in Kano). Houses there are as expensive as the type down south and the cost of food and goods are as expensive. And I can't afford that kind of life for now.

Understood. I am curious, a typical one-bedroom apartment with access to a good supply of electricity and water in Sabon-gari costs how much as rent for a year?

And yes, northern men still dey build houses and marry multiple wives in this economy.

Dem dey try sha. Well, their dominance in agribusiness provides enough funds especially as the cost of living is low. Why they don't harness this to ensure improved security in the region surprises me.

Gerrard59:
This is what you should do: suspend any relationship plans for now and get started in medical school. As a matured student, you don't have time to waste on non-essential things. While in school, especially the first three years, improve your medical education and sources of sustenance. Afterwards, you can begin your search for a wife, and you will find loads of them since you are in an academic environment. In fact, you will be spoilt for choices since you are on the path of being a medical doctor. No rush these things. Once a man is financially stable,
na dem dey rush am.

Your financial stability as a man is very important. That is what you should focus on.


Interesting to note. Not surprised as I have stated elsewhere on Nairaland that the region's culture and religion influences the way of life.


More interesting. As I have stated above and previously, target the Christians when in school. I am sure Christians attend Bayero and ABU (you probably got into one).


You see this revelation? It is the reason whenever people on social media lament about "Nigerian women", I beg to disagree because I know Northern Nigeria is very different. So, the online claim that Nigerian women are this and that does not hold to me.


While the cost of living is low, salaries are lower compared to the south. Am I wrong? Generally, the cost of living is lower in the north and I once envisaged living in the north, especially in Christian communities, but the insecurity situation under Buhari especially related to agribusiness was so terrible. If not for the insecurity and intolerance, many people from the south would love to reside there instead of living in certain Francophone countries. Not many people can survive in the hypercompetitive south, so the north would have been a much better option for them.


Again, men create the society, while women integrate into it. I stated the same here: https://www.nairaland.com/7684230/how-reduce-hook-ups-nigeria#123051795
Does the concept of virginity apply in large numbers to Northern Christian women?


Interesting to note. Seems Islam is not really compatible with capitalism unless there exists a clear divide between the Muslim natives and non-Muslims (Malaysia and the UAE are good examples).


Understood. I am curious, a typical one-bedroom apartment with access to a good supply of electricity and water in Sabon-gari costs how much as rent for a year?


Dem dey try sha. Well, their dominance in agribusiness provides enough funds especially as the cost of living is low. Why they don't harness this to ensure improved security in the region surprises me.

Thank you very much for the first advice! It really shed more light. I'm just gonna focus on my education and side hustle untill level four before considering relationship. Just like you said, I would meet better women there, wether Muslims or christains.

I believe the salary structure in the north is not much different from that in the south even for multinational companies or banks talkmore of the civil service where we have
high rate of ghostworkers and corruption.

And since the cost of living is relatively lower in the north while salary remain thesame, Muslim men can still afford to get married again, and build or rent another house for the new wife










No the concept of virginity does not apply in large number to the northern Christian ladies. They're as liberal as the ladies down south (
We have the good, the bad and the ugly )


Right now, I can say that Kano and jigawa state which is next door are about the most secured states in the north. I don't think I have heard any case of kidnapping or banditry here since it started in buhari's regime wether in the cities and or villages. The last time a bomb blast occured was during GEJ regime. And it was just once or twice.

Southerners live and go about thier businesses peacefully in sabon gari. All the banks here have 80 percent of thier staff as southerners.

More southerners are still trooping to Kano everyday and areas like Nomansland and Jabba are rapidly being developed to accomodate them. These areas are even more beautiful and cleaner than sabongari which is already overpopulated.

While a one bedroom apartment in sabon gari might cost between 300k to 450k depending on if it's a new or old house and facilitities present. All houses in Jabba are relatively new and way more expensive( not more than ten years as the whole place was literally a bush during the first tenure of GEJ. Land at Jabba that time were dirty cheap and alot of Ibo men saw the prospects of the place and they have more than triple thier wealth today). You'll even see one room self-contained been given out at 350k.
Jabba also enjoy stable electricity and good roads than sabongari. Sabon gari and Jabba are not far from each other at all. The moment you leave sabongari, you will enter Jabba.

Solcampbell:
Thank you very much for the first advice! It really shed more light. I'm just gonna focus on my education and side hustle untill level four before considering relationship. Just like you said, I would meet better women there, wether Muslims or christains.

Yes, that is the truth. No point to rush as you might regret it when your status has improved and you have developed yourself well enough to attract good looking people towards you. Just develop new sources of income and stay healthy. Na you go run from advances.

I believe the salary structure in the north is not much different from that in the south even for multinational companies or banks talkmore of the civil service where we have high rate of ghostworkers and corruption. And since the cost of living is relatively lower in the north while salary remain thesame, Muslim men can still afford to get married again, and build or rent another house for the new wife

Oh! I see.

No the concept of virginity does not apply in large number to the northern Christian ladies. They're as liberal as the ladies down south ( We have the good, the bad and the ugly )

Interesting to note.

Right now, I can say that Kano and jigawa state which is next door are about the most secured states in the north. I don't think I have heard any case of kidnapping or banditry here since it started in buhari's regime wether in the cities and or villages. The last time a bomb blast occured was during GEJ regime. And it was just once or twice. Southerners live and go about thier businesses peacefully in sabon gari. All the banks here have 80 percent of thier staff as southerners. More southerners are still trooping to Kano everyday and areas like Nomansland and Jabba are rapidly being developed to accomodate them. These areas are even more beautiful and cleaner than sabongari which is already overpopulated.

While a one bedroom apartment in sabon gari might cost between 300k to 450k depending on if it's a new or old house and facilitities present. All houses in Jabba are relatively new and way more expensive( not more than ten years as the whole place was literally a bush during the first tenure of GEJ. Land at Jabba that time were dirty cheap and alot of Ibo men saw the prospects of the place and they have more than triple thier wealth today). You'll even see one room self-contained been given out at 350k.
Jabba also enjoy stable electricity and good roads than sabongari. Sabon gari and Jabba are not far from each other at all. The moment you leave sabongari, you will enter Jabba.

Interesting, and good to know.

Thanks for the info.

Guys, avoid getting married or having children. It is a mess these days.