₦airaland Forum

swtdinma:
I need good male friends... Whatsapp me on 07089835349

Why?

If you will be marrying a single mother, you should do it from a place a strength. I mean, she should be ready to give, not just money, than an average woman should give.

It won't be funny if after marriage, baby mama start to dey hoard sex and expects you to pay her pikin school fees anyways.

No rules bro...

Na the future go determine if our choices today make sense or not. A good woman is a good woman irrespective of her mistakes.

I have dated 1 single mom and was Fwb with another... 1 was a bitch the other was cool headed lover at heart.. but just got preggy at 19.

It depends on what you want. Most times guys that do that either settle for training the stepson or send him to village to grow with granny. But it depends on what you want.

I didn't settle with mine though... so I cut the relationship off at 3 to 4 months because the likeness was getting too much.

She was mature. Na societal pressure they make most guys run from single moms dem no be say the babe no tick all your boxes.. ngl it's a huge baggage

ICTspecialist:
She's 28, very caring, she got pregnant after being deceived by her ex but after she delivered the baby, dude abandoned her and is currently cohabiting with another woman tho he occasionally calls and sends upkeep to the son and I fear okafor's law might play out anytime she meets with her ex and father of his son
I'm 34 and we're dating and she's being supportive as well, kind, caring and above all respectful.
Well I hope all these characters are not
pretense to get me to marry her and now our relationship and bond has gone indepth.
But I'm scared to tell my friends the lady I'm dating and want to propose marriage to has a son and I'm scared to tell my family as well.
So guys can you marry a single mother?
What's your advise, pros and cons of marrying a lady that has a child from her previous relationship.
Cc advanceDNA nonexisting1 nonexisting luminuoz et al

All single mothers are always humble and respectful, until you marry them.

There is not like mistake, if you truly it was a mistake, so now, na you be the dumping ground for cleaning up her mistake?

You must learn a lesson.

Sonnobax15:

In as much as I'm not against anyone marrying a single mother...

But then again,as a young man,I wouldn't advise you to start your life by marrying a single mother, especially when her baby daddy is still very much alive . Cuz they'll always use their baby as a point of meeting,and meeting can lead to knacking .

Abeg,no start wetin you no go fit finish.

For you to even ask some questions, e mean say something dey tell you “No” but you are asking validation.

Just leave OP to ask validation for wetin hin wan do, they no dey tell person

I don't know why I'm laughing in New King James version.

See as he just Dey paint her good
You’re digging an unlimited amount of pain which could lead or fasten the number of days you have left on earth
Don’t let her scam you

pansophist:
I think they are contribute to society in such a way that they leave more women for us, and also takes other dude along with them.

wow this is so insightful and an epic response
Ignore that woman, she's a depressed and frustrated and fed up with life cos she's hopeless.
Imagine the fool calling me on phone with a private number, issuing threats to my life all because I'm against her useless LGBTQ nonsense.

goran3310:
https://www.nairaland.com/8241482/whats-advice
A much better option than marrying a single mother.

Omo
Mehn the certainly means they are a no no.
Abeg kindly share your experience pls

Gromilla010:
I love that

Why are homophobes so scared of homosexuals?

that guy pansophist is very brilliant and one of the few intellectuals we have on this forum
You on the other hand you're not smart enough to engage him in a conversation as he'll flaw you.
Your case Is so worse that when someone beats you to a conversation you'll resort to abusing and cursing cos you have nothing upstairs.
Such a foolish woman.
Make I lay hold on your details I go finish you

Nicepoker:
Single mothers are liars. All of them.

all?

AfeezShomorin:
Na wah o.
Nothing wey Musa no go see for gate, see self confessed homosexual called someone an anomaly.

If it were to be in medieval times someone like you would be tied to the stake and burned alive just like they do to witches

she knows she's not save that's why she hid her number to call me threatening to kill me cos I spoke against her LGBTQ nonsense..
She should call me with her real identity next time if she's truly proud of her sexuality.
Such a frustrated woman in her late 40's

ICTspecialist:
She's 28, very caring, she got pregnant after being deceived by her ex but after she delivered the baby, dude abandoned her and is currently cohabiting with another woman tho he occasionally calls and sends upkeep to the son and I fear okafor's law might play out anytime she meets with her ex and father of his son
I'm 34 and we're dating and she's being supportive as well, kind, caring and above all respectful.
Well I hope all these characters are not
pretense to get me to marry her and now our relationship and bond has gone indepth.
But I'm scared to tell my friends the lady I'm dating and want to propose marriage to has a son and I'm scared to tell my family as well.
So guys can you marry a single mother?
What's your advise, pros and cons of marrying a lady that has a child from her previous relationship.
Cc advanceDNA nonexisting1 nonexisting luminuoz et al

"She got pregnant after being deceived by her ex"

I have to wait for Namaster's comments.

I can only marry a single mom if she is not a Nigerian Lady.

ICTspecialist:
all?

All of them.

Don't marry her, since she has a son, because that son will go back to his land. Nigeria men loves their father property, but if it's a girl child you can accept her, and monitor her till she reach 19 or 20, then you can Bleep her, to fulfill the scripture that says the husband man that labor must be the first partaker.

Run o. She will always put her child/children first before you.

She's got lots of baggage ( Bitterness, Anger , Unforgiveness, resentment , depression etc

swtdinma:
I need good male friends... Whatsapp me on 07089835349

You need someone to suck your breasts?

Please let me see a pic of your breasts first before I decide to contact you

Brother, do this now or you will regret it in the future.

In life I have learnt that no shoe fits all. There is no set rule for how our lives would turn out.

Op, if you feel she is the one that would make u happy and u are sure u can tolerate her excesses, then by all means go ahead and marry her.

There are many successful single mom/man marriages as much as there are failed ones. So don't let peoples opinions sway u.

Some single mom marriages have outlasted some normal marriages.

Watch as Someone would come here to say "Football match nor dey start with 1:0 down"


Single mothers don suffer in this life

Between a single mother and a HIV carrier, I dont know who suffer stigmatization Pass sef.

My guy leave single mothers for single fathers make them marry themselves, don't bring yourself to baby mama, baby papa things bikonu

Gromilla010:
I love that

Why are homophobes so scared of homosexuals?

They are not scared, but disgusted.

Even though I have nothing against homosexuals, the very act disgust me. Lots of things disgust me.

Lesbianism also disgust me. A twenty something years old person making love to a seventy something years old person disgust me also.

BBL disgust me. And so forth. Not hate, just pure disgust.

Chai, single mother's ti daran bayi...

My ladies, can you now see the pictures painted??

Ensure to protect yourself against unwanted pregnancies at all times. You alone carry all the risks and stigma...

Your body, health, sanity everything is at stake. Know who you open your legs for. And If the do happen, I subscribe to remove it ASAP.

Rizzputin:
Most single mothers are sweet, caring and supportive when they like you.

In fact, they can be so caring and well mannered you'd want to marry then asap.

But... it's a trap. They're merely pretending. Once they get what they want from you (marriage), her bad side will start showing.

Take note, I didn't say "true colour" Because someone's true color isn't just their bad side. It's a combination of good and bad. So, once she gets married to you, the bad side of her true color will show. And some times, it may not be a bad side you might want to deal with or handle.


The second reason why you should never marry a single mother is because she has a hidden resent for men. Her story is typical amongst single mothers. Their exes are always "deceiving" them.

But regardless of how sad their ex story is, she CHOSE to date him. CHOSE to sleep with him unprotected. So even though her ex will get a majority of the blame. She gets the blame too. No matter how bad she paints her ex, it's the same man she opened her legs for and had a baby with.... and it's the same man that's now the father of her child...

Which brings me to the third and biggest reason....

No matter what you do or sacrifice, no matter your love for each other.... that child will always be above you in her heart & mind. The child's needs and wants will be placed above yours.

Which means a strong connection and attraction will always be to her ex. Her ex can use the child to get to her heart and between her legs again and again.

Worst of all, the ex can make life a hell for you if he wants the child to come and stay with him. If the woman doesn't agree, you'll find yourself entering into a war you shouldn't be in.


On that note, the best thing is to repay her in whatever capacity she has supported you and bid her fare well.

The only time I MIGHT consider a guy marrying a single mother is if the father of the child is dead.

If not, it's a bad idea

What a wise counsel....
I am really impressed.

pansophist:
They are not scared, but disgusted.

Even though I have nothing against homosexuals, the very act disgust me. Lots of things disgust me.

Lesbianism also disgust me. A twenty something years old person making love to a seventy something years old person disgust me also.

BBL disgust me. And so forth. Not hate, just pure disgust.

oh pansophist...I have been following you due to the likes you have on this forum on some of your quotes but you are truly wrong on this one oooo.
There is a difference between disgust and fear
If you are disgusted about something,,you don't need bother engaging in something you show strong revolt on...when disgust turns into obsession then phobia....you just can't be obsessed over something you disapprove...it's an error....disgust and obsession are just two parallel lines that can never meet.

Now phobia is an overwhelming debilitating fear of an object, place, situation, feeling or animal...this comes into play for example...phobia comes Into play when a dingbat comes to the habitat of the snake kingdom(obsession)to start hunting cobra and wanting to kill them cos they fear they are poisonous... because in their deluded mind the cobra snake might show up among humans and decide to kill them with their venoms...that is when homophobia comes into play...after all the person who coined the word homophobia was actually right...homo +phobia is not disgust but fear of homosexuals

Pansophist you must bear this in mind that what might be truly disgusting to you will be truly admirable to another...what you perceive as charming might be truly revolting to another

You can't tell me that pigmeat is disgusting to you ..then you wouldn't allow the one person who wants to eat the pigmeat to eat it cos you feel it is disgusting to you...is that not madness?
There is a limit to some madness...if certain things disgust you then you leave,,you shouldn't even bother engaging in it at all..but when it comes to obsession that's when phobia comes in...you fear for the unknown then you attack

Your opinion is nothing more than an opinion...and your opinion doesn't signify factuality... do you know to lesbians they perceive the opposite sex as disgusting and to the gaymen they perceived the opposite sex too as disgusting so what difference those that make from your own assertion...in as much as the lesbians and gay find heterosexuality disgusting you can never see such obsession among them about what straight couples do behind close doors

Lastly I don't think you understand the meaning of disgusting...if you do then you know that what you hate is what disgust you

ICTspecialist:
that guy pansophist is very brilliant and one of the few intellectuals we have on this forum
You on the other hand you're not smart enough to engage him in a conversation as he'll flaw you.
Your case Is so worse that when someone beats you to a conversation you'll resort to abusing and cursing cos you have nothing upstairs.
Such a foolish woman.
Make I lay hold on your details I go finish you

pansophist is not that brilliant..
He mixes quater truth with the flawed perspective of it all one dimensionally and not considering the other party drawing conclusion from false analogy and then boom making it a true fact...and when in reality all what he says are quarter truth baked up with flawed assumptions.
You claim to open a thread about advice but here you are throwing tantrums..is this what you do for a living looking for a companion,, seeking for advice in a faceless forum while drooling and obsessing over gay threads and other diversity etc is that what you call fulfilment ..you must be a joker...if you truly want to be Happy and fulfilled in this life..try to be tolerant about people's sexual orientation, culture, ethnicity, religion,,, infact all diversity that is different from yours and work on how to better your life and that of your loved ones... If not just receive whatever calamity nature throws at you wholeheartedly!!

ICTspecialist:
Omo
Mehn the certainly means they are a no no.
Abeg kindly share your experience pls

I have no experience. I don't want to have such experience. I will not raise and support other people's children. I don't want a woman who is emotionally damaged by a previous marriage. I don't want to be a second husband and for our children to be her second children. Only a man of low qualities will marry a woman with a child instead of a girl.

Bad idea.

That ex go knack your wife tire and you won't be able to do shit.

What about divorced single mothers, I guess their own case is worst. I'm dealing with one currently but I don't see the possibility of ending with each other.

ICTspecialist:
She's 28, very caring, she got pregnant after being deceived by her ex but after she delivered the baby, dude abandoned her and is currently cohabiting with another woman tho he occasionally calls and sends upkeep to the son and I fear okafor's law might play out anytime she meets with her ex and father of his son
I'm 34 and we're dating and she's being supportive as well, kind, caring and above all respectful.
Well I hope all these characters are not
pretense to get me to marry her and now our relationship and bond has gone indepth.
But I'm scared to tell my friends the lady I'm dating and want to propose marriage to has a son and I'm scared to tell my family as well.
So guys can you marry a single mother?
What's your advise, pros and cons of marrying a lady that has a child from her previous relationship.
Cc advanceDNA nonexisting1 nonexisting luminuoz et al

You obviously don't love her enough if she's not attached to the man anymore, you can always give her a chance people make mistakes, there are some single mom that are better than single girls around, even Virginity doesn't guarantee a good marriage, marriage this days in Nigeria have the man to play a key role,as some loose interest after two to three kids and stop supporting their wives and kids

Some people would see single mothers as bad women, bitches but not all are or were, there would say why let a irresponsible man impregnate you, people change, this men they're everywhere most of them shouting marry virgin have kids outside that's what I'm saying; Before this issues will stop responsibility must be from both parties, use condoms as a man,contraceptive as a female.

There are girls that use pregnancy to trap guys we all know this, but yet there have been cases of guys too that would impregnate girls after promising everything even do the introduction with the person and later leave, nobody is perfect.
Now back to your question "are you sure, you love her and all because if you were you wouldn't be thinking about what people around you would say"... Yes they would talk but they are not the ones that will be married to you, stay with you and be one with you.

There are marriages people see as "nawa oh " but they are still standing today because of understanding, trust, love, and communication. Check her family background, ask around watch how she reacts if she's too good try to make her angry see her reaction to how she handles things. Just free her if you know you can't handle it, after all life continues, let her decide her fate and you decide yours.

ICTspecialist:
yes boss na why I include for that post that I fear okafor's law might happen whenever they meet..
And the baby daddy is younger than me too probably 30.
But I'll be so ashamed to tell my family and my friends she has a son from her previous relationship.
E come be like second hand or fairly used material I dey purchase but just that she fine oooo and from a good home as it plays in her good character and she's financially independent

a recent scenerio happened on a radio program, the man married a baby mama, the baby father is such an irresponsible person but d new husband is very responsible

The woman now have birth to another child despite being married to the new responsible husband, could u believe the baby father came to claim the baby n he established it beyond reasonable doubt that he had sex with the woman despite d fact she's married

They asked him how he always do it n he said he will call d woman he wants to see his child n when she brings d child he will find a way to seduce d woman since he knows her weak point n he will have his way

Imagine they are now going to do DNA test, hope u don't want to find yourself in that kinda situation