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My Wife Family Mounting Their Father Burial Expense On Me, How I Reacted At Once - Family (14) - Nairaland

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Re: My Wife Family Mounting Their Father Burial Expense On Me, How I Reacted At Once by Kipit100: 7:54am On Nov 14, 2024
BlindAngel:
Good evening Nairalanders, few months ago I posted here regarding how my wife forced me into marriage that I wasn't in anyway ready for because she got pregnant. I posted about the regret I'm still battling until date, because the love isn't there from my own end and I'm also not in anyway attracted to her physically. I have told her severally that I want to option out of the marriage and not doing again but until date she has refused to let me go.

Back to the main point, my wife lost her dad this morning. Her deceased dad has two wife's and several concubines that gave birth to lots of children, my wife doesn't know some of her half brothers and sisters.

So I went to their family house this morning to console them. The eldest son of the family (her half brother) told me and another in law that we'd be the one to pay for mortuary expenses and casket, and when the burial is getting closer they'd give us a list of things to buy and we'd both bring one goats each.

To be brutally honest I wasn't mad because of this latest expense, I got furious immediately and right on the spot because of the pressure my wife pressured me into getting married to her, by now I'd have been totally free of these unnecessary expenses. More than 19 of her sisters, both biological and half sisters that has given birth, no single expense was listed for their man that they got pregnant for and has a child for. But I and the other in law that paid dowry are the one going through these unnecessary expenses.

So immediately he told me about everything, I charged at my wife right on the spot, right in front of her mom, her brothers, her sisters and some of her friends that came for condolence visit. I got so furious and started shouting at the top of my voice, I reminded her how she forced me into marriage that I'm not in anyway prepared and ready for, both physically, psychologically, emotionally, financially. (I have been reminding her regarding this almost on a daily basis and whenever we are quarreling.

I reminded her how she threatened me with suicide and our of fear of the unknown I wasted almost 4m in getting married to her. I told her that I'd have been free of these expenses if not for her pressure.

Immediately she burst into tears, and started crying endlessly.

Her mom and sisters started yelling at me and I yelled back at all of them. They told me I met her a Virgin and now she's no longer good for me (truly, the whole family thought that I was the one that took her virginity) My wife and I agreed to keep it a secret, but the constant remainder from her mom and sisters made me let the cat out of the bag, I told them that I didn't met her a Virgin that she has already started having sex when I met her, they didn't believe me but with my tone, I know they'd.

I also made mentioned that I'm not buying any goat or paying for mortuary or taking any list from them. That it's their dad and they should take care of every responsibilities, after all he has uncountable children, why putting some of the expense on me? I walked away, and switched off my phone until now that I'm just putting it on.

I know that I acted wrongly and allowed my anger to get the best part of me. But I was furious because no single bill went to her sister's baby father's, absolutely nothing was listed for them. I got furious because these expenses won't be on me right now if not for her pressuring me into marriage that I want ready for. I was furious because I and the other in law that they billed became the scape goat by doing the right thing by getting married and not leaving theirs daughter In ruins, where as those that got their daughter pregnant without getting married to them were totally free from these unnecessary bills. I'm in so much pains and regret right now.
I for say u no get sense but I no go talk am....nobody force u marry. Why u go knack who u no fit marry abi na your wife force u for road kon carry u go house knack you and she con get belle abi...oga rest support ur inlaws anyway u can in the burial jare.... rubbish pro max.
Re: My Wife Family Mounting Their Father Burial Expense On Me, How I Reacted At Once by wirinet(m): 7:58am On Nov 14, 2024
DEXTROVERT:
Nobody put a gun on his head to pay the mortuary or burial expenses.

They asked him, he should have told them he doesn't have instead of dragging his poor wife into the quagmire.

See, the money you have is what you give out, nobody manufactures money.
They did not ask him or beg him. The inlaws presented him with a list, a demand of what they expect him to do.
Re: My Wife Family Mounting Their Father Burial Expense On Me, How I Reacted At Once by MamaletASO: 8:01am On Nov 14, 2024
You are a fooooool...

This your cooked story is nonsenseee...

Your mouth and statement stinks..

Re: My Wife Family Mounting Their Father Burial Expense On Me, How I Reacted At Once by chidiokay: 8:01am On Nov 14, 2024
BlindAngel:
Money dey my hand that time, after everything I was left with 130k. And on the morning of the marriage I went and hurried to get extra drinks, because they drank lots of drinks I bought for reception on the day of the traditional marriage. Back to the fact, I was left work just 9k after buying the drinks. If u see frustration and regret after the marriage?? Thank God say I later bounced back.
All these talk no hold water, whatever spending you did naa you collect the "glory" shebi you like to shine... dem hail you your head swell o lor nowo tuh
if your budget is 2m nobody can force to spend extra if you dont want ... You just no like to dey take responsibility for any of your actions ... everything dem force you niii

Howfar 2nd wife cheesy ... do we have to force you abi you go do am yourself cheesy
Re: My Wife Family Mounting Their Father Burial Expense On Me, How I Reacted At Once by sirscripture: 8:02am On Nov 14, 2024
BlindAngel:
Good evening Nairalanders, few months ago I posted here regarding how my wife forced me into marriage that I wasn't in anyway ready for because she got pregnant. I posted about the regret I'm still battling until date, because the love isn't there from my own end and I'm also not in anyway attracted to her physically. I have told her severally that I want to option out of the marriage and not doing again but until date she has refused to let me go.

Back to the main point, my wife lost her dad this morning. Her deceased dad has two wife's and several concubines that gave birth to lots of children, my wife doesn't know some of her half brothers and sisters.

So I went to their family house this morning to console them. The eldest son of the family (her half brother) told me and another in law that we'd be the one to pay for mortuary expenses and casket, and when the burial is getting closer they'd give us a list of things to buy and we'd both bring one goats each.

To be brutally honest I wasn't mad because of this latest expense, I got furious immediately and right on the spot because of the pressure my wife pressured me into getting married to her, by now I'd have been totally free of these unnecessary expenses. More than 19 of her sisters, both biological and half sisters that has given birth, no single expense was listed for their man that they got pregnant for and has a child for. But I and the other in law that paid dowry are the one going through these unnecessary expenses.

So immediately he told me about everything, I charged at my wife right on the spot, right in front of her mom, her brothers, her sisters and some of her friends that came for condolence visit. I got so furious and started shouting at the top of my voice, I reminded her how she forced me into marriage that I'm not in anyway prepared and ready for, both physically, psychologically, emotionally, financially. (I have been reminding her regarding this almost on a daily basis and whenever we are quarreling.

I reminded her how she threatened me with suicide and our of fear of the unknown I wasted almost 4m in getting married to her. I told her that I'd have been free of these expenses if not for her pressure.

Immediately she burst into tears, and started crying endlessly.

Her mom and sisters started yelling at me and I yelled back at all of them. They told me I met her a Virgin and now she's no longer good for me (truly, the whole family thought that I was the one that took her virginity) My wife and I agreed to keep it a secret, but the constant remainder from her mom and sisters made me let the cat out of the bag, I told them that I didn't met her a Virgin that she has already started having sex when I met her, they didn't believe me but with my tone, I know they'd.

I also made mentioned that I'm not buying any goat or paying for mortuary or taking any list from them. That it's their dad and they should take care of every responsibilities, after all he has uncountable children, why putting some of the expense on me? I walked away, and switched off my phone until now that I'm just putting it on.

I know that I acted wrongly and allowed my anger to get the best part of me. But I was furious because no single bill went to her sister's baby father's, absolutely nothing was listed for them. I got furious because these expenses won't be on me right now if not for her pressuring me into marriage that I want ready for. I was furious because I and the other in law that they billed became the scape goat by doing the right thing by getting married and not leaving theirs daughter In ruins, where as those that got their daughter pregnant without getting married to them were totally free from these unnecessary bills. I'm in so much pains and regret right now.
Bro, man to man you sound like you are partly irresponsible. Why do you keep mentioning the money you spent in marrying her? Where did you expect the money to come from?

Girls are to be treated like Queens that they are and when they over stretch you can treat their Bleep ups like you did. But you should not have pushed all the faults on your wife. People hustle to marry bro, it was her right to hustle you and if the thing no pay you, court is not far from you.

Well done on standing your ground. Don't let them use responsibility kill you.

Abeg go plead to your wife, you have disgraced her before her family and that could have been done differently.

Thanks
Re: My Wife Family Mounting Their Father Burial Expense On Me, How I Reacted At Once by wirinet(m): 8:02am On Nov 14, 2024
Blackdisciple:
But I was furious because no single bill went to her sister's baby father's, absolutely nothing was listed for them

Probably since they did not come to do the right thing that's why they are not recognized in the family yet. So reminding your wife every time una fight that she forced you into married is killing her gradually. So fix it bro and as for your inlaws you might need to apologize to the mama, they never knew that their daughter was never a virgin as they thought hence you spending likely 4m for a wedding of a camouflage virgin..
That means it's better to be a baby daddy than to be a husband. Being a baby daddy frees you of all obligations of husband, inlaw and even daddy. You are free to be enjoying different kpekus as you like without any obligations.
Re: My Wife Family Mounting Their Father Burial Expense On Me, How I Reacted At Once by promami: 8:06am On Nov 14, 2024
BlindAngel:
Thank you, I will be careful. She called me this morning and started talking about how I embarrassed her in front of her family and friends, then she hanged up. I went home this evening and I didn't see her at home, I've called everyone close to her and until now her whereabouts is unknown, her numbers isn't going through and her WhatsApp profile picture has turned white.

Nevertheless, I'd find out tomorrow what's really going on.
Alright bro
Welldone.
I admire the kind of courage you used to unhinge yourself from that parasitic family.

Remember this 👇

The 15th law of power from "The 48 Laws of Power" is "Crush Your Enemy Totally." This law states that if you defeat your enemy, you should not leave them any room to recover or seek revenge. If you do, they will eventually come back to haunt you.

Women knows this law by default.
You've made the first move.
Always watch your back. She'll come back.
Re: My Wife Family Mounting Their Father Burial Expense On Me, How I Reacted At Once by chidiokay: 8:15am On Nov 14, 2024
idahme:
All the men sleeping with prostitutes do they love them? Some of the sex results into pregnancies. You don't need to love a woman to impregnate her but certainly he will love his child.
You dont love dem, buh no man go carry a prostitute he does not find physically attractive or sexually attractive

how many gurl wey you dislike you don sleep with
Re: My Wife Family Mounting Their Father Burial Expense On Me, How I Reacted At Once by vickydevoka(m): 8:16am On Nov 14, 2024
BlindAngel:
Good evening Nairalanders, few months ago I posted here regarding how my wife forced me into marriage that I wasn't in anyway ready for because she got pregnant. I posted about the regret I'm still battling until date, because the love isn't there from my own end and I'm also not in anyway attracted to her physically. I have told her severally that I want to option out of the marriage and not doing again but until date she has refused to let me go.

Back to the main point, my wife lost her dad this morning. Her deceased dad has two wife's and several concubines that gave birth to lots of children, my wife doesn't know some of her half brothers and sisters.

So I went to their family house this morning to console them. The eldest son of the family (her half brother) told me and another in law that we'd be the one to pay for mortuary expenses and casket, and when the burial is getting closer they'd give us a list of things to buy and we'd both bring one goats each.

To be brutally honest I wasn't mad because of this latest expense, I got furious immediately and right on the spot because of the pressure my wife pressured me into getting married to her, by now I'd have been totally free of these unnecessary expenses. More than 19 of her sisters, both biological and half sisters that has given birth, no single expense was listed for their man that they got pregnant for and has a child for. But I and the other in law that paid dowry are the one going through these unnecessary expenses.

So immediately he told me about everything, I charged at my wife right on the spot, right in front of her mom, her brothers, her sisters and some of her friends that came for condolence visit. I got so furious and started shouting at the top of my voice, I reminded her how she forced me into marriage that I'm not in anyway prepared and ready for, both physically, psychologically, emotionally, financially. (I have been reminding her regarding this almost on a daily basis and whenever we are quarreling.

I reminded her how she threatened me with suicide and our of fear of the unknown I wasted almost 4m in getting married to her. I told her that I'd have been free of these expenses if not for her pressure.

Immediately she burst into tears, and started crying endlessly.

Her mom and sisters started yelling at me and I yelled back at all of them. They told me I met her a Virgin and now she's no longer good for me (truly, the whole family thought that I was the one that took her virginity) My wife and I agreed to keep it a secret, but the constant remainder from her mom and sisters made me let the cat out of the bag, I told them that I didn't met her a Virgin that she has already started having sex when I met her, they didn't believe me but with my tone, I know they'd.

I also made mentioned that I'm not buying any goat or paying for mortuary or taking any list from them. That it's their dad and they should take care of every responsibilities, after all he has uncountable children, why putting some of the expense on me? I walked away, and switched off my phone until now that I'm just putting it on.

I know that I acted wrongly and allowed my anger to get the best part of me. But I was furious because no single bill went to her sister's baby father's, absolutely nothing was listed for them. I got furious because these expenses won't be on me right now if not for her pressuring me into marriage that I want ready for. I was furious because I and the other in law that they billed became the scape goat by doing the right thing by getting married and not leaving theirs daughter In ruins, where as those that got their daughter pregnant without getting married to them were totally free from these unnecessary bills. I'm in so much pains and regret right now.
Just form i don't care, Irresponsible men de enjoy this time
Re: My Wife Family Mounting Their Father Burial Expense On Me, How I Reacted At Once by vickydevoka(m): 8:18am On Nov 14, 2024
kevwemike:
Guy wat is wrong with U? Why are U talking like a child, U don't like the girl but Ur dick like her pussy to the extent U got her pregnant, and U are here saying that she force u into the marriage, u dey here urself? The truth is that wat the family counted for U is the right thing to do as in-law , just try and do the needful is Ur in-law.
😂 😂 😂. If na me I no go give watin I never get. Irresponsible men de enjoy
Re: My Wife Family Mounting Their Father Burial Expense On Me, How I Reacted At Once by idahme(m): 8:19am On Nov 14, 2024
chidiokay:
You dont love dem, buh no man go carry a prostitute he does not find physically attractive or sexually attractive

how many gurl wey you dislike you don sleep with
You are living in an ideal world in your head but the world is rather a real world and it is what it is. Most people won't even have the opportunity to be with who they want and they won't will have to do with the available just because they want to have sex not because they want the person in the long term. That is what it is.
Re: My Wife Family Mounting Their Father Burial Expense On Me, How I Reacted At Once by vickydevoka(m): 8:22am On Nov 14, 2024
Ginaz:
You should have respected her a bit, the outbursts are not needed in this critical time that her dad is dead. She needs you for comfort and peace , you can tell the family the extent you can assist financially without degrading her worth before her people.

You did wrong. Despite you don't love her , she's a human with feelings. I can't imagine being reminded how I'm not needed constantly by my husband, she's going through a lot.

Be kind or rather seek a divorce if you can't stand the marriage anymore.
He's talking rubbish. Let him go and marry another lady that he thinks he loves, after them show am shege,na him go run find this one. Marriage is actually not for everyone. I'm over 30 but I'm not bothered about marriage even in 10 years time bcus I know I can't chest bills by borrowing. I hate asking for financial assistance. God!!!. I hate it with passion. I rather do baby mama.
Re: My Wife Family Mounting Their Father Burial Expense On Me, How I Reacted At Once by Khallicopyro: 8:24am On Nov 14, 2024
Na poverty dey worry you. Go huzzle bro.
Re: My Wife Family Mounting Their Father Burial Expense On Me, How I Reacted At Once by lomprico(m): 8:27am On Nov 14, 2024
BlindAngel:
Good evening Nairalanders, few months ago I posted here regarding how my wife forced me into marriage that I wasn't in anyway ready for because she got pregnant. I posted about the regret I'm still battling until date, because the love isn't there from my own end and I'm also not in anyway attracted to her physically. I have told her severally that I want to option out of the marriage and not doing again but until date she has refused to let me go.

Back to the main point, my wife lost her dad this morning. Her deceased dad has two wife's and several concubines that gave birth to lots of children, my wife doesn't know some of her half brothers and sisters.

So I went to their family house this morning to console them. The eldest son of the family (her half brother) told me and another in law that we'd be the one to pay for mortuary expenses and casket, and when the burial is getting closer they'd give us a list of things to buy and we'd both bring one goats each.

To be brutally honest I wasn't mad because of this latest expense, I got furious immediately and right on the spot because of the pressure my wife pressured me into getting married to her, by now I'd have been totally free of these unnecessary expenses. More than 19 of her sisters, both biological and half sisters that has given birth, no single expense was listed for their man that they got pregnant for and has a child for. But I and the other in law that paid dowry are the one going through these unnecessary expenses.

So immediately he told me about everything, I charged at my wife right on the spot, right in front of her mom, her brothers, her sisters and some of her friends that came for condolence visit. I got so furious and started shouting at the top of my voice, I reminded her how she forced me into marriage that I'm not in anyway prepared and ready for, both physically, psychologically, emotionally, financially. (I have been reminding her regarding this almost on a daily basis and whenever we are quarreling.

I reminded her how she threatened me with suicide and our of fear of the unknown I wasted almost 4m in getting married to her. I told her that I'd have been free of these expenses if not for her pressure.

Immediately she burst into tears, and started crying endlessly.

Her mom and sisters started yelling at me and I yelled back at all of them. They told me I met her a Virgin and now she's no longer good for me (truly, the whole family thought that I was the one that took her virginity) My wife and I agreed to keep it a secret, but the constant remainder from her mom and sisters made me let the cat out of the bag, I told them that I didn't met her a Virgin that she has already started having sex when I met her, they didn't believe me but with my tone, I know they'd.

I also made mentioned that I'm not buying any goat or paying for mortuary or taking any list from them. That it's their dad and they should take care of every responsibilities, after all he has uncountable children, why putting some of the expense on me? I walked away, and switched off my phone until now that I'm just putting it on.

I know that I acted wrongly and allowed my anger to get the best part of me. But I was furious because no single bill went to her sister's baby father's, absolutely nothing was listed for them. I got furious because these expenses won't be on me right now if not for her pressuring me into marriage that I want ready for. I was furious because I and the other in law that they billed became the scape goat by doing the right thing by getting married and not leaving theirs daughter In ruins, where as those that got their daughter pregnant without getting married to them were totally free from these unnecessary bills. I'm in so much pains and regret right now.
You are a weak man! Why marry who you don't love? How can a woman force you to marry her? Getting pregnant does not mean you will marry her.

Anyways your reaction here is totally unnecessary. You would have calmly told them you will only support the best way you can, they cannot mandate what you will bring for the burial.
Re: My Wife Family Mounting Their Father Burial Expense On Me, How I Reacted At Once by bibleprayerhub: 8:31am On Nov 14, 2024
kevwemike:
Guy wat is wrong with U? Why are U talking like a child, U don't like the girl but Ur dick like her pussy to the extent U got her pregnant, and U are here saying that she force u into the marriage, u dey here urself? The truth is that wat the family counted for U is the right thing to do as in-law , just try and do the needful is Ur in-law.
Everything I want to say u just said it

Imagine in front of your inlaw

It shows you don't respect your wife and your in-laws

U could have called your wife one corner and tell her u don't have money.

Go and apologize and do the right thing
Re: My Wife Family Mounting Their Father Burial Expense On Me, How I Reacted At Once by pryme(m): 8:32am On Nov 14, 2024
BlindAngel:
Good evening Nairalanders, few months ago I posted here regarding how my wife forced me into marriage that I wasn't in anyway ready for because she got pregnant. I posted about the regret I'm still battling until date, because the love isn't there from my own end and I'm also not in anyway attracted to her physically. I have told her severally that I want to option out of the marriage and not doing again but until date she has refused to let me go.

Back to the main point, my wife lost her dad this morning. Her deceased dad has two wife's and several concubines that gave birth to lots of children, my wife doesn't know some of her half brothers and sisters.

So I went to their family house this morning to console them. The eldest son of the family (her half brother) told me and another in law that we'd be the one to pay for mortuary expenses and casket, and when the burial is getting closer they'd give us a list of things to buy and we'd both bring one goats each.

To be brutally honest I wasn't mad because of this latest expense, I got furious immediately and right on the spot because of the pressure my wife pressured me into getting married to her, by now I'd have been totally free of these unnecessary expenses. More than 19 of her sisters, both biological and half sisters that has given birth, no single expense was listed for their man that they got pregnant for and has a child for. But I and the other in law that paid dowry are the one going through these unnecessary expenses.

So immediately he told me about everything, I charged at my wife right on the spot, right in front of her mom, her brothers, her sisters and some of her friends that came for condolence visit. I got so furious and started shouting at the top of my voice, I reminded her how she forced me into marriage that I'm not in anyway prepared and ready for, both physically, psychologically, emotionally, financially. (I have been reminding her regarding this almost on a daily basis and whenever we are quarreling.

I reminded her how she threatened me with suicide and our of fear of the unknown I wasted almost 4m in getting married to her. I told her that I'd have been free of these expenses if not for her pressure.

Immediately she burst into tears, and started crying endlessly.

Her mom and sisters started yelling at me and I yelled back at all of them. They told me I met her a Virgin and now she's no longer good for me (truly, the whole family thought that I was the one that took her virginity) My wife and I agreed to keep it a secret, but the constant remainder from her mom and sisters made me let the cat out of the bag, I told them that I didn't met her a Virgin that she has already started having sex when I met her, they didn't believe me but with my tone, I know they'd.

I also made mentioned that I'm not buying any goat or paying for mortuary or taking any list from them. That it's their dad and they should take care of every responsibilities, after all he has uncountable children, why putting some of the expense on me? I walked away, and switched off my phone until now that I'm just putting it on.

I know that I acted wrongly and allowed my anger to get the best part of me. But I was furious because no single bill went to her sister's baby father's, absolutely nothing was listed for them. I got furious because these expenses won't be on me right now if not for her pressuring me into marriage that I want ready for. I was furious because I and the other in law that they billed became the scape goat by doing the right thing by getting married and not leaving theirs daughter In ruins, where as those that got their daughter pregnant without getting married to them were totally free from these unnecessary bills. I'm in so much pains and regret right now.
Which State is your wife from? It sounds like a State I know very well to do this.
Re: My Wife Family Mounting Their Father Burial Expense On Me, How I Reacted At Once by chidiokay: 8:38am On Nov 14, 2024
idahme:
You are living in an ideal world in your head but the world is rather a real world and it is what it is. Most people won't even have the opportunity to be with who they want and they won't will have to do with the available just because they want to have sex not because they want the person in the long term. That is what it is.
Oga you can as well tell me i was born yesterday,i asked a very simple question how many babe you dislike wey you don nack

or you dont know what it means not to find someone physically attractive nii huh
Re: My Wife Family Mounting Their Father Burial Expense On Me, How I Reacted At Once by sammiewrite(m): 8:42am On Nov 14, 2024
If just a fraction of what you wrote has an element of the truth, then it is not looking good and may not end well (especially as the birth of your child couldn't change your mind). So, if it is within your means, maybe make her an offer she can't refuse and proceed from there. And please, for the love of whatever you hold dear, don't make the mistake of getting intimate again until you have accepted her fully as your wife. The world needs less of broken people.
Re: My Wife Family Mounting Their Father Burial Expense On Me, How I Reacted At Once by DukeNija(m): 8:42am On Nov 14, 2024
madridguy:
If you know what is good for you just go and apologize to your wife, mother-inlaw and the entire family.

If you know you cannot do their culture, why marry their daughter?

While you were sleeping with their daughter without protection, pouring your seed in her body what result are you expecting?

After that, did they put a gun on your head to pay and bride price and marry her?

I will suggest you don't make unnecessary enemies, just try and calm down and see what you could do.... Life na gently no be everything be gra gra my brother.
Na God go punish and destroy that useless culture. All of you are mad with culture. If he can’t feed his family or pay his rent will they hand him such exorbitant bill? Will he buy the casket and pay for her dad’s mortuary bill if he’s jobless? Like I said, the culture and the enablers are all mad. I’m glad they met their match in him.
Re: My Wife Family Mounting Their Father Burial Expense On Me, How I Reacted At Once by Innomach(m): 8:44am On Nov 14, 2024
So sad, man. But let me ask you, do you have kids? Apart from you not loving her, has she been a good wife and mother? These are the only thing that should matter most to you and not LOVE. There's no such thing like love or a perfect woman..... You wouldn't know the value of what you have until you loose it. This same woman you demean and belittle today could be your pillar and support tomorrow while that perfect woman you dreams of and regrets for not being the one you are with may abandon you at trying time. There's more to marriage than love and looks

BlindAngel:
As I'm talking to you right now, they are saying all manners of words, that I disrespected them and the they won't pity me with the list they'd give me.

That aside, to be brutally honest with you, I didn't mean to disrespect them, I have tried all manner of ways to walk out of this marriage but I don't see that happening. Maybe this will be the deal breaker, I won't do any of what they mentioned, absolutely none. I believe it'd make them hate me and by God's grace I pray and I'm praying hard for them to talk about returning my bride price to me.
Re: My Wife Family Mounting Their Father Burial Expense On Me, How I Reacted At Once by Rhaspody(m): 8:46am On Nov 14, 2024
Sometimes you just have to tell it as it is in your heart. Damn the consequences
Re: My Wife Family Mounting Their Father Burial Expense On Me, How I Reacted At Once by Acidosis(m): 8:46am On Nov 14, 2024
I may be wrong, but I think your challenges began when you embarked on a journey you weren't fully prepared for. Many married men in your position secretly imagine their lives without marriage. Many feel they would have done much better if not for marriage. The only difference is that they don’t go on emotional outbursts, lashing out at their wives and embarrassing others.

Another group of men are those who, although single, have started taking on responsibilities typically expected of married men. These ones will never forgive themselves when they go broke later on in life.

Back to you, you seem like the type of person who gets very upset when you run out of cash. This is a major character flaw you need to work on, first by making sure you live within your means as much as possible. T-pain already makes this challenging, so put more effort on your emotions.

Your woman is not responsible for what you have become. You made your choices, you will live with those choices without hurting anyone in the process. A simple "No, I do not have what it takes to handle my father-in-law's burial rites" would have saved you this stress.

This idea of comparing your marriage with her 16 or 18 sisters makes no sense. There is no tradition on earth that mandates you to carry that responsibility on your head. If any exist at all in this customary reckless country, then you break it with dignity. If, in their own family, they expect in-laws to do such, make them realise that, in your own village, such customs are forbidden. It is not about them, but you.
Re: My Wife Family Mounting Their Father Burial Expense On Me, How I Reacted At Once by Wealth3g: 8:49am On Nov 14, 2024
BlindAngel:
G.

They told u she's a virgin, & u knew she wasn't. U then went ahead to keep it secret with her.

This is the genesis of the whole problem, & this marriage can never stand, as it's built on a faulty foundation.
Re: My Wife Family Mounting Their Father Burial Expense On Me, How I Reacted At Once by prophetfire: 8:51am On Nov 14, 2024
madridguy:
Your uncles at home are the mumu for failing to train you properly.
🤣🤣 E pain you?
They're not mumuoo. They're Alpha males and not SIMple like you.
Re: My Wife Family Mounting Their Father Burial Expense On Me, How I Reacted At Once by DoctorAyukebot(m): 8:57am On Nov 14, 2024
Stevenbright:
My question is if you and the other in-law are to pay for the mortuary expenses and the buying of the casket, what will all the man's uncountable children do!
Eat, dance and share what property is left of the rolling stone dad..Lol
Re: My Wife Family Mounting Their Father Burial Expense On Me, How I Reacted At Once by Alfred2026: 8:58am On Nov 14, 2024
BlindAngel:
Good evening Nairalanders, few months ago I posted here regarding how my wife forced me into marriage that I wasn't in anyway ready for because she got pregnant. I posted about the regret I'm still battling until date, because the love isn't there from my own end and I'm also not in anyway attracted to her physically. I have told her severally that I want to option out of the marriage and not doing again but until date she has refused to let me go.

Back to the main point, my wife lost her dad this morning. Her deceased dad has two wife's and several concubines that gave birth to lots of children, my wife doesn't know some of her half brothers and sisters.

So I went to their family house this morning to console them. The eldest son of the family (her half brother) told me and another in law that we'd be the one to pay for mortuary expenses and casket, and when the burial is getting closer they'd give us a list of things to buy and we'd both bring one goats each.

To be brutally honest I wasn't mad because of this latest expense, I got furious immediately and right on the spot because of the pressure my wife pressured me into getting married to her, by now I'd have been totally free of these unnecessary expenses. More than 19 of her sisters, both biological and half sisters that has given birth, no single expense was listed for their man that they got pregnant for and has a child for. But I and the other in law that paid dowry are the one going through these unnecessary expenses.

So immediately he told me about everything, I charged at my wife right on the spot, right in front of her mom, her brothers, her sisters and some of her friends that came for condolence visit. I got so furious and started shouting at the top of my voice, I reminded her how she forced me into marriage that I'm not in anyway prepared and ready for, both physically, psychologically, emotionally, financially. (I have been reminding her regarding this almost on a daily basis and whenever we are quarreling.

I reminded her how she threatened me with suicide and our of fear of the unknown I wasted almost 4m in getting married to her. I told her that I'd have been free of these expenses if not for her pressure.

Immediately she burst into tears, and started crying endlessly.

Her mom and sisters started yelling at me and I yelled back at all of them. They told me I met her a Virgin and now she's no longer good for me (truly, the whole family thought that I was the one that took her virginity) My wife and I agreed to keep it a secret, but the constant remainder from her mom and sisters made me let the cat out of the bag, I told them that I didn't met her a Virgin that she has already started having sex when I met her, they didn't believe me but with my tone, I know they'd.

I also made mentioned that I'm not buying any goat or paying for mortuary or taking any list from them. That it's their dad and they should take care of every responsibilities, after all he has uncountable children, why putting some of the expense on me? I walked away, and switched off my phone until now that I'm just putting it on.

I know that I acted wrongly and allowed my anger to get the best part of me. But I was furious because no single bill went to her sister's baby father's, absolutely nothing was listed for them. I got furious because these expenses won't be on me right now if not for her pressuring me into marriage that I want ready for. I was furious because I and the other in law that they billed became the scape goat by doing the right thing by getting married and not leaving theirs daughter In ruins, where as those that got their daughter pregnant without getting married to them were totally free from these unnecessary bills. I'm in so much pains and regret right now.
Correct bro. I like men that take stance immediately.
Re: My Wife Family Mounting Their Father Burial Expense On Me, How I Reacted At Once by DoctorAyukebot(m): 8:59am On Nov 14, 2024
Acidosis:
I may be wrong, but I think your challenges began when you embarked on a journey you weren't fully prepared for. Many married men in your position secretly imagine their lives without marriage. Many feel they would have done much better if not for marriage. The only difference is that they don’t go on emotional outbursts, lashing out at their wives and embarrassing others.

Another group of men are those who, although single, have started taking on responsibilities typically expected of married men. These ones will never forgive themselves when they go broke later on in life.

Back to you, you seem like the type of person who gets very upset when you run out of cash. This is a major character flaw you need to work on, first by making sure you live within your means as much as possible. T-pain already makes this challenging, so put more effort on your emotions.

Your woman is not responsible for what you have become. You made your choices, you will live with those choices without hurting anyone in the process. A simple "No, I do not have what it takes to handle my father-in-law's burial rites" would have saved you this stress.

All this nonsensical ideas of comparing your marriage with her 16 or 18 sisters makes no sense. Marriage or not, there is no tradition on earth that mandates you to carry that responsibility on your head. If any exist at all, it is your time to break it.
You nailed it with maturity
Re: My Wife Family Mounting Their Father Burial Expense On Me, How I Reacted At Once by Consula: 9:03am On Nov 14, 2024
BlindAngel:
Good evening Nairalanders, few months ago I posted here regarding how my wife forced me into marriage that I wasn't in anyway ready for because she got pregnant. I posted about the regret I'm still battling until date, because the love isn't there from my own end and I'm also not in anyway attracted to her physically. I have told her severally that I want to option out of the marriage and not doing again but until date she has refused to let me go.

Back to the main point, my wife lost her dad this morning. Her deceased dad has two wife's and several concubines that gave birth to lots of children, my wife doesn't know some of her half brothers and sisters.

So I went to their family house this morning to console them. The eldest son of the family (her half brother) told me and another in law that we'd be the one to pay for mortuary expenses and casket, and when the burial is getting closer they'd give us a list of things to buy and we'd both bring one goats each.

To be brutally honest I wasn't mad because of this latest expense, I got furious immediately and right on the spot because of the pressure my wife pressured me into getting married to her, by now I'd have been totally free of these unnecessary expenses. More than 19 of her sisters, both biological and half sisters that has given birth, no single expense was listed for their man that they got pregnant for and has a child for. But I and the other in law that paid dowry are the one going through these unnecessary expenses.

So immediately he told me about everything, I charged at my wife right on the spot, right in front of her mom, her brothers, her sisters and some of her friends that came for condolence visit. I got so furious and started shouting at the top of my voice, I reminded her how she forced me into marriage that I'm not in anyway prepared and ready for, both physically, psychologically, emotionally, financially. (I have been reminding her regarding this almost on a daily basis and whenever we are quarreling.

I reminded her how she threatened me with suicide and our of fear of the unknown I wasted almost 4m in getting married to her. I told her that I'd have been free of these expenses if not for her pressure.

Immediately she burst into tears, and started crying endlessly.

Her mom and sisters started yelling at me and I yelled back at all of them. They told me I met her a Virgin and now she's no longer good for me (truly, the whole family thought that I was the one that took her virginity) My wife and I agreed to keep it a secret, but the constant remainder from her mom and sisters made me let the cat out of the bag, I told them that I didn't met her a Virgin that she has already started having sex when I met her, they didn't believe me but with my tone, I know they'd.

I also made mentioned that I'm not buying any goat or paying for mortuary or taking any list from them. That it's their dad and they should take care of every responsibilities, after all he has uncountable children, why putting some of the expense on me? I walked away, and switched off my phone until now that I'm just putting it on.

I know that I acted wrongly and allowed my anger to get the best part of me. But I was furious because no single bill went to her sister's baby father's, absolutely nothing was listed for them. I got furious because these expenses won't be on me right now if not for her pressuring me into marriage that I want ready for. I was furious because I and the other in law that they billed became the scape goat by doing the right thing by getting married and not leaving theirs daughter In ruins, where as those that got their daughter pregnant without getting married to them were totally free from these unnecessary bills. I'm in so much pains and regret right now.
NEVER EVER REGRET WHAT YOU DID.......That was the best thing you've done for yourself and the beginning of you taking practical steps to set yourself free from the bondage. I wish you the courage to see this through, weldone.
Re: My Wife Family Mounting Their Father Burial Expense On Me, How I Reacted At Once by maasoap(m):
chidiokay:
i guess you are not married nor in any long term commitment, if everyone should walk out of marriage the moment they don't feel love nobody will remain in marriage, everybody go don divorce
In every marriage there will be that time the love go just collapse like national grid, naa commitment, understanding and communication go just help una scale through

When it comes to marriage i see the whites as inferior and low thinkers, a life run solely on "feelings" can never have a direction
According to Op, there was no point in time he thought he loved her, from the past till now. He even said that she used pregnancy and threat to kill herself to force him into this marriage. And the Op feelings for her haven't changed positively till this hour. What else do you people want to hear from him? And if one kills the other tomorrow, all of you will still be asking question that why couldn't they divorce before it got to that stage.
As for me not being married or not in a long term commitment, my relationships experience is rich and interesting enough to write a story book cheesy. I follow my guts, I follow my heart, I don't allow pressure from anyone to dictate my decision.
Re: My Wife Family Mounting Their Father Burial Expense On Me, How I Reacted At Once by fakati(m): 9:11am On Nov 14, 2024
There is a saying that whatever you won't should not by any means come close to your nose there is no justification that someone forced you into marriage and at the same time you are not solely responsible for the financial burden of their father's burial yours is to support according as your strength and capability.
Re: My Wife Family Mounting Their Father Burial Expense On Me, How I Reacted At Once by Allisgud: 9:23am On Nov 14, 2024
What state is she from
Re: My Wife Family Mounting Their Father Burial Expense On Me, How I Reacted At Once by NobleStag007: 9:27am On Nov 14, 2024
BlindAngel:
Good evening Nairalanders, few months ago I posted here regarding how my wife forced me into marriage that I wasn't in anyway ready for because she got pregnant. I posted about the regret I'm still battling until date, because the love isn't there from my own end and I'm also not in anyway attracted to her physically. I have told her severally that I want to option out of the marriage and not doing again but until date she has refused to let me go.

Back to the main point, my wife lost her dad this morning. Her deceased dad has two wife's and several concubines that gave birth to lots of children, my wife doesn't know some of her half brothers and sisters.

So I went to their family house this morning to console them. The eldest son of the family (her half brother) told me and another in law that we'd be the one to pay for mortuary expenses and casket, and when the burial is getting closer they'd give us a list of things to buy and we'd both bring one goats each.

To be brutally honest I wasn't mad because of this latest expense, I got furious immediately and right on the spot because of the pressure my wife pressured me into getting married to her, by now I'd have been totally free of these unnecessary expenses. More than 19 of her sisters, both biological and half sisters that has given birth, no single expense was listed for their man that they got pregnant for and has a child for. But I and the other in law that paid dowry are the one going through these unnecessary expenses.

So immediately he told me about everything, I charged at my wife right on the spot, right in front of her mom, her brothers, her sisters and some of her friends that came for condolence visit. I got so furious and started shouting at the top of my voice, I reminded her how she forced me into marriage that I'm not in anyway prepared and ready for, both physically, psychologically, emotionally, financially. (I have been reminding her regarding this almost on a daily basis and whenever we are quarreling.

I reminded her how she threatened me with suicide and our of fear of the unknown I wasted almost 4m in getting married to her. I told her that I'd have been free of these expenses if not for her pressure.

Immediately she burst into tears, and started crying endlessly.

Her mom and sisters started yelling at me and I yelled back at all of them. They told me I met her a Virgin and now she's no longer good for me (truly, the whole family thought that I was the one that took her virginity) My wife and I agreed to keep it a secret, but the constant remainder from her mom and sisters made me let the cat out of the bag, I told them that I didn't met her a Virgin that she has already started having sex when I met her, they didn't believe me but with my tone, I know they'd.

I also made mentioned that I'm not buying any goat or paying for mortuary or taking any list from them. That it's their dad and they should take care of every responsibilities, after all he has uncountable children, why putting some of the expense on me? I walked away, and switched off my phone until now that I'm just putting it on.

I know that I acted wrongly and allowed my anger to get the best part of me. But I was furious because no single bill went to her sister's baby father's, absolutely nothing was listed for them. I got furious because these expenses won't be on me right now if not for her pressuring me into marriage that I want ready for. I was furious because I and the other in law that they billed became the scape goat by doing the right thing by getting married and not leaving theirs daughter In ruins, where as those that got their daughter pregnant without getting married to them were totally free from these unnecessary bills. I'm in so much pains and regret right now.
You are a good man. I can sense responsibility in you.
You acted right and don't fall into their guilt tripping
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