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No guy should accept no sex before marriage or in a relationship.... Immediately she tells you that, leave her ooooooo...if you marry her, she go starve you die.In fact once in a month or twice in three months sex

Mypeople2:
No guy should accept no sex before marriage or in a relationship.... Immediately she tells you that, leave her ooooooo...if you marry her, she go starve you die.In fact once in a month or twice in three months sex

Where did you get that idea from? Lol

Merry100:
I am not aware of any power struggles that exist in relationships involving two mature individuals.

Women often express their love for men primarily through care, emotional support, and sometimes gifts, while men often show their love and affection for women mainly through financial support and sometimes emotional support.

Money is a man's love language. Even if a woman is not the demanding type, some men will insist that she ask for things or will even offer her gifts on their own. When they genuinely love a woman, men are willing to go the extra mile to show their affection and prove that they are ideal partners.

Ma'am,you sounded respectful and I'll try my best to do the same. It may require an open mind for you to grasp it though.

Any relationship involving two or more is usually governed by needs. One party must have a need that he hopes the other party will give him/her. It could be anything;money,sex,emotional support,social value,fame you name it.

If this need is too much on one part,this will automatically translate to neediness.

Now the other party might not even have a single need for the other but with the huge neediness of the other the leverage in the relationship already lies with him/her.

This explains why some men spend crazy amount on ladies who have serious boyfriends they genuinely care about. And men banging that girl head over heels over them while being nice to and planning wedding with their fiancee.


Same also applies in business settings. Companies will treat you better and be more willing to pay you more when you have unique experience or skills compared to employee that will be easy to replace.

Bottom-line is the power games is being played even indefinitely.

Badmashiii:
Ma'am,you sounded respectful and I'll try my best to do the same. It may require an open mind for you to grasp it though.

Any relationship involving two or more is usually governed by needs. One party must have a need that he hopes the other party will give him/her. It could be anything;money,sex,emotional support,social value,fame you name it.

If this need is too much on one part,this will automatically translate to neediness.

Now the other party might not even have a single need for the other but with the huge neediness of the other the leverage in the relationship already lies with him/her.

This explains why some men spend crazy amount on ladies who have serious boyfriends they genuinely care about. And men banging that girl head over heels over them while being nice to and planning wedding with their fiancee.


Same also applies in business settings. Companies will treat you better and be more willing to pay you more when you have unique experience or skills compared to employee that will be easy to replace.

Bottom-line is the power games is being played even indefinitely.

From this, we can conclude that power struggles do exist in some relationships, but they are not inherent to all relationships.

razible5384:
ladies should equally stop making financial demands on everyguy that shows interest in them, it can be very annoying. Some will not even allow you to ask them out officially, yet Dem don dey bill you...

They call it "show workings"

On the other hand, my medical doctor acquaintance mentioned how it doesn't make sense to have sex with every man in a relationship as changing relationships meant to have sex with every single man. Meanwhile, marriage isn't assured. The comments in this thread explaining the connection between money and sex in a supposedly loving relationship tells a lot - love doesn't exist.

End. Of. Discussion.

purples25:
This is all a pipe dream anyway. Real life that I know, many girls go through one year, three year relationships without any spending on them, because they want to prove they are not golddiggers. They also give sex for free, to prove they are not prostitutes. After which it doesn't work out between them and the guys that keep entering relationships and breaking up with them.

So all this talk about spending money... Especially for the average homebody girl that wants to prove she's good, those girls don't see the money. The guys may even be borrowing from them. It's common.

There's no money, just sex most times. So what's all this talk. The girl go gain with no sex self.

Fair argument.

So now, the same ladies have insisted on no premarital sex or spend the money.

Since birds have learnt to fly without perching, hunters have learnt to shoot without missing. 🤣🤣🤣

Merry100:
From this, we can conclude that power struggles do exist in some relationships, but they are not inherent to all relationships.

No ma'am,power struggles exist in all relationships involving humans.

You as a lady should know better. Women are naturally proficient in the game of power compared to men.

Most ladies will rather die than make the first move to a man they fancy. Why's that? They inherently know the outcome of starting a relationship as the needy party.

The term "playing hard to get" is something mainly associated with women and that tells a lot.

Playing hard to get is an effective way of either increasing your leverage by demonstrating non-neediness or balancing the scale of power if you start the relationship on wrong footings.

There's a saying that goes without saying;"women are Machiavellian as water is wet." You're probably playing dumb on the existence of or even your awareness of the "game" when in reality you're among the outstanding players.

If a lady said no s*x In relationship that means she won’t be demanding money (even data)from me,besides why am I dating her in the first place 🙃

purples25:
You see that without sex you don't see the need for a relationship.

yimu...Is it not for the pleasure of both parties. Pretenders

femi4:
yimu...Is it not for the pleasure of both parties. Pretenders

Why not say hypocrites. That's the more common and effective term.

purples25:
Why not say hypocrites. That's the more common and effective term.

Pretender is prefer

femi4:
Pretender is prefer

Anyone, as long as it will make girls feel guilty.

essentialone:
How can a guy be sure if a girl loves him, when she suddenly says 'No sex' in the relationship?
What else will the guy gain from dating her?
Since relationship is mutual, and the girl is closing her part, what will the guy be gaining from her?

The truth is, most Nigeria ladies nowadays offer nothing in a relationship, absolutely nothing.
They can't keep a conversation going with a level of IQ.
They can contribute to your knowledge.
Most of them can't even cook, clean or wash (even with a washing machine) - they will make you spend on ordering food or go on expensive dates.
Most of them can't pray.
They literally offer nothing, the fact is, the few that will say they offer emotional support, ask their boyfriends to be honest, they are just managing them, there isn't any much of a support apart from their presence in the relationship. They can even bill you, or remember what they need to buy even while you are emotionally down.
To the singles out there, if you find a good one, keep her so close and dearly, they aren't much nowadays.

Badmashiii:
No ma'am,power struggles exist in all relationships involving humans.

You as a lady should know better. Women are naturally proficient in the game of power compared to men.

Most ladies will rather die than make the first move to a man they fancy. Why's that? They inherently know the outcome of starting a relationship as the needy party.

The term "playing hard to get" is something mainly associated with women and that tells a lot.

Playing hard to get is an effective way of either increasing your leverage by demonstrating non-neediness or balancing the scale of power if you start the relationship on wrong footings.

There's a saying that goes without saying;"women are Machiavellian as water is wet." You're probably playing dumb on the existence of or even your awareness of the "game" when in reality you're among the outstanding players.

Nice input 👍

However, I believe "power dynamics" is a more suitable term.

Power dynamics exist in all relationships, but not all lead to power struggles. Some partners find effective ways to balance these dynamics.

Power struggle imply a competition for control while power dynamics encompass the structures and mechanisms through which power is distributed within relationships.

purples25:
Anyone, as long as it will make girls feel guilty.

It's not about feeling guilty, It's about telling them the truth

femi4:
It's not about feeling guilty, It's about telling them the truth

Yes, the truth that they should agree to sex without hesitation to prove to you that they're not pretenders.

purples25:
Yes, the truth that they should agree to sex without hesitation to prove to you that they're not pretenders.

It doesn't change the fact that they enjoy it, hesitation doesn't remove the pleasure

femi4:
It doesn't change the fact that they enjoy it, hesitation doesn't remove the pleasure

Therefore hesitation is useless and it is pretence, there is no reason for hesitation since they get pleasured by the act.

You see that road you are going down, don't ever stop, especially when you have a daughter. Advice her the same way.

Merry100:
Nice input 👍

However, I believe "power dynamics" is a more suitable term.

Power dynamics exist in all relationships, but not all lead to power struggles. Some partners find r m effective ways to balance these dynamics.

Power struggle imply a competition for control while power dynamics encompass the structures and mechanisms through which power is distributed within relationships.

You nailed it absolutely. Guess i wasn't wrong when i said you were among the outstanding players.

Power dynamics is the correct term.

Now tell me,in any relationship with a person,whether same sex or otherwise would you rather be the weak party or the one in control?

purples25:
So... Some guys go taste... Realize say they no wan buy... Giving the girl high body count, which another guy after tasting... Go also decide say him no want because of that high body count... Who lose in this arrangement.

Taste girls like suya... Dump half eaten food, say you no full, e no sweet ... You no want again... Of cus after that, nobody wan chop your left over... N

Until God grace you with the girl wey you go taste and dey okay with...How does this arrangement favor women?

There will be many tested and abandoned food be dat.

Nothing like that is up to her family to accept the guy or say we. Don't like him.

That's what my ex parents told. Her after u go see her dad.
She said let's end it
I don't break up. With a girl it's her parents to see if am good or looking for rich guy for her.

Badmashiii:
You nailed it absolutely. Guess i wasn't wrong when i said you were among the outstanding players.

Power dynamics is the correct term.

Now tell me,in any relationship with a person,whether same sex or otherwise would you rather be the weak party or the one in control?

I tend to be assertive, but I can take on a controlling role when necessary.

My position - whether weak or dominant - often varies based on the type of relationship and the individual I'm interacting with.

I prioritize mutual respect and collaboration in my interactions.

raphy:
Nothing like that is up to her family to accept the guy or say we. Don't like him.

That's what my ex parents told. Her after u go see her dad.
She said let's end it
I don't break up. With a girl it's her parents to see if am good or looking for rich guy for her.

That's you man. A girl will get tested in the name of relationship by 6 guys before she even smells a guy like you. Testing na scam for ladies, and most guys are getting free sex in the name of testing.

Merry100:
I tend to be assertive, but I can take on a controlling role when necessary.

My position - whether weak or dominant - often varies based on the type of relationship and the individual I'm interacting with.

I prioritize mutual respect and collaboration in my interactions.

Oh I see.

From your write-up you have no qualms about being the weaker party but the person should endeavour not to rub it in your face by being a bit nice which is what you mean by "mutual respect" ,correct?

Many men like myself have mastered such like an art. We would assumed the dominant position but occasionally act nice and defer to some of your whims to massage your ego while still maintaining overall dominance.

purples25:
That's you man. A girl will get tested in the name of relationship by 6 guys before she even smells a guy like you. Testing na scam for ladies, and most guys are getting free sex in the name of testing.

Not all are like that joor
The one I met was a virgin na me open her she no gree leave me until her dad say he no support our relationship I Waka jeje.she de even try to check if I have another girl but I let her stay her lane

Badmashiii:
Oh I see.

From your write-up you have no qualms about being the weaker party but the person should endeavour not to rub it in your face by being a bit nice which is what you mean by "mutual respect" ,correct?

Many men like myself have mastered such like an art. We would assumed the dominant position but occasionally act nice and defer to some of your whims to massage your ego while still maintaining overall dominance.

Are you still talking about a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship? It seems more like a friendship than a controlling dynamic.

Do you enjoy using your words out of context?

raphy:
Not all are like that joor
The one I met was a virgin na me open her she no gree leave me until her dad say he no support our relationship I Waka jeje.she de even try to check if I have another girl but I let her stay her lane

Not all but many. If it's not so, there won't be women with plenty body counts roaming about. There won't be many men in this very thread fighting for testing which they know may not end in marriage or advantage for the girls.

You see that as you tested first, it so happened that the girls father rejected you. These are the disadvantages. Even if its not your fault, something can go wrong, life can happen.

Merry100:
Are you still talking about a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship? It seems more like a friendship than a controlling dynamic.

Do you enjoy using your words out of context?

Perhaps.

I'm talking about romantic relationship.

purples25:
Not all but many. If it's not so, there won't be women with plenty body counts roaming about. There won't be many men in this very thread fighting for testing which they know may not end in marriage or advantage for the girls.

You see that as you tested first, it so happened that the girls father rejected you. These are the disadvantages. Even if its not your fault, something can go wrong, life can happen.

The last word
Life can happen correct

raphy:
The last word
Life can happen correct

That's why testing shouldn't be normalized.

And I am not using it as an excuse for other men o. Life is not happening kan kan, they are deliberately sleeping with and ending relationships with these girls.

purples25:
Therefore hesitation is useless and it is pretence, there is no reason for hesitation since they get pleasured by the act.

You see that road you are going down, don't ever stop, especially when you have a daughter. Advice her the same way.

Naija girls mentality, my daughter understood that sex isn't transactional, and won't use it as a tool or acting as if it's a privilege act

fineberry:
boss you are mouthed abeg no vex which one be tertiary Virgin again I don't laugh tire . I dey feel your submission 💯%

na because of ladies wy no b virgins wey go come say I am a celebate wetin she dey celebate? No b my fault

femi4:
Naija girls mentality, my daughter understood that sex isn't transactional, and won't use it as a tool or acting as if it's a privilege act

Yes shey she will give it when asked so as not to be a pretender. Advice her same na, since any woman that even tries to close her legs is a pretender.