₦airaland Forum

Broveens42:
When you choose a certain life style, be prepared to match that life style with corresponding responsibility.

A lot of Nigerians are often influenced by "what people will say" than their own personal conviction, and if I insinuate that a certain man made religion could be partially responsible, don't argue with me ;

1. How can a human being who has a wonderful structure in his village and large farmlands and spaces at the market square, settle for 100k job in a town he would be required to pay rent and other bills ?
2. How can a human being give his first salary to a pastor rather than a woman who shared the umbilical cord with him?
3. What informs the decision of Humans to get married to an unproductive and unaccountable partner; Do they hope such partner would change after marriage?


I'm not married but I still have common sense to continue with the things I do, because I know it will still be the same case in marriage.

U are a very matured young man my brother. There is sense in everything u just mentioned here.

This is a very important topic and I hope men and married men especially will learn. This is also me when I was catering for all the financial responsibilities of the home with two kids and wife wasn't working, the worst that can happen to a man is to marry a woman that doesn't earn, your life go just useless in your very own eyes, mine even start cheating after 5years of marriage despite all I have done for the family, she paid me back with betrayal, we got separated for two years now and the kids had been fine , now I now realize that even if I die, this kids will still be fine, that's just life. Men don't kill yourself, do your best and leave the rest, take care of yourself,health and eat well cos those your family your are going through a lot for, when you die, they will be fine, that your wife, na another man go begin they Bleep her well. After our separation she started sleeping with her boss at work and I heard she is planning to be his second wife. Just imagine a woman that I went through hell for. Omo I don so learn now that I can never go extra mile again for anyone, I think of my self first and become selfish.

gtassure:
I think the wife is only telling him to use his senses! Nigerian men tend to over do this "provider status" as if dem be Elon Musk! We have Hero complex. Unfortunately Heroes usually don't last!

Hmmm, true.

Jennyclay:
Why would he have 4 kids when he knows he’s broke and poor

Gone are those when people born as many as possible.

Take care of your wife and have just 1 or 2 kids that you can cater for without stress. Simple!!

Shebi if a woman can complement what the man brings to the table, The world no go fall abi??

OlawaleBammie:
After getting the two kids and undergone vasectomy, u now realise that those two kids belongs to ur wife ex...lol

Sebi u no wan get sense ni, I will be happy to see you ing.est 3 bottles of sniper

baba werey
Lmao..
Walai I no think reach that side o

aestake:
How? One or two children would be much better for most families in Nigeria.

Are you saying parents should dispose of the remaining two, If they are four kids. You people should not be talking like this, unless the family is extremely poor I may suggest one or two kids. But if the parents are trying, four kids are good. I have seen a family that it's the last born that took the responsibility of his Age parents out of 5 kids. I have seen parent mourn the only son they have at old age. To cut story short, if extremely poor, no even bring children come life make them go suffer. But if they are trying, at least 4 kids no too much. Quote me anywhere

seanwilliam:
baba werey
Lmao..
Walai I no think reach that side o

Leave the weyrey, shebi e no wan get sense ni.

Imagine me as a man doing vasectomy..aahhh for wetin na,

Bobodee09:
Is so bad that has a married man you can't even buy yourself new wears.

Throughout last year I couldn't get myself a new set of jeans trouser even tho I needed it badly despite having the money.
All the money I made last year 90% when into paying bills and household expenses.
It so crazy how you has a man you will have over 200k in your acc and you be scared to even buy yourself something of 10k cos of fear of the unknown.
In all of this my wife and kids still has many clothes they haven't worn I paid for you.

Last weekend my wife bought herself over 10 new shirt and when I saw it I reminded her how I couldn't even buy myself new jean....she told me nah me no wan buy nah.
It really hurt me cos whatever money I make the family expenses come first before my own personal needs but it isn't same for women.

I just feel marriage is design for men to suffer honestly.
People just taking from you and no one really care about what you need.

Yen yen yen!! Who sent you to have multiple kids?


You ppl will born born everywhere and start complaining. You made you bed, lie in it.

Free2Fly:
Where does an average Nigerian see 30million??
Did you have 30m in your 20s?

At age 40,80% of men should have been with less pressure economically.

Which when translated to what i just said here earlier,starting early is very much important such that 30 or 20 million saved over time would have help reduced or alleviate all the economic pressures
confronting almost every households today.

U might say it is very difficult to achieve this,then the question is,how much does one need to retire if that amount is too much for a 40 year old fellow.

Yes,I know everyone can't be lucky but many guys engage in frivolities when they are much more younger,hence the crisis confronting them at this present age and time in thier marriages

This must be how my father killed himself same year I was born.
Well fortunately but funny, My mother is still Alive and Healthy. It's been 34 years now.
Only God knows how many men I have called Dad because they all lived with Mom in the house my father had built before he died.

May your days be long 3toto for you to calm down the bp

Bobodee09:
This advise goes especially to married men and men in general.

Don't put yourself under unnecessary pressure or take up loans to maintain a certain lifestyle.

I just lost an area senior bros this morning, the news didn't come as shock cos he has been in the hospital for a while and his BP refused to come down.

He is man in his late 40's married with 4 kids. This man was under alot of pressure to meet end means, he took up too many loans just to maintain his living standards to please his family.

The last time I visited him in general I also checked my BP and it was very high, I was also under pressure myself to meet target.
When I got home I promised myself I wont die young to please anyone.
I will do my best and leave the rest cos at the end no one really care all they want to do is take from you as a man.

Married men enjoy yourself, take care of yourself, buy what you want. You can't be working everyday and be suffering to please your wife and kids.

The men who die young are the ones who always labour and don't take care of themselves, you see men who only provide what they have and take care of themselves they live longer.

We are in this mess together trust me....those people you think are doing better have alot of loans on their neck. So don't let anyone push you by comparing you to them.

If what you provide isnt enough or appreciated tell your wife to also provide or take her leave.

Bobodee09:
This advise goes especially to married men and men in general.

Don't put yourself under unnecessary pressure or take up loans to maintain a certain lifestyle.

I just lost an area senior bros this morning, the news didn't come as shock cos he has been in the hospital for a while and his BP refused to come down.

He is man in his late 40's married with 4 kids. This man was under alot of pressure to meet end means, he took up too many loans just to maintain his living standards to please his family.

The last time I visited him in general I also checked my BP and it was very high, I was also under pressure myself to meet target.
When I got home I promised myself I wont die young to please anyone.
I will do my best and leave the rest cos at the end no one really care all they want to do is take from you as a man.

Married men enjoy yourself, take care of yourself, buy what you want. You can't be working everyday and be suffering to please your wife and kids.

The men who die young are the ones who always labour and don't take care of themselves, you see men who only provide what they have and take care of themselves they live longer.

We are in this mess together trust me....those people you think are doing better have alot of loans on their neck. So don't let anyone push you by comparing you to them.

If what you provide isnt enough or appreciated tell your wife to also provide or take her leave.

I'm Speechless!

OlawaleBammie:
Lol, Mr Santiago Vargas, as a new Chile citizen...I am not suffering here sir.
Not that I am bragging but I actually turned down Canada links twice just to stay here in Nigeria..

My monthly income here in Nigeria can take care of three wives with two kids each and I will still have savings...no be everybody dey suffer here sir.

I just want to get more funds, buy stocks from other developed countries stock markets, invest for my old age and have some properties.. kpele...we that are in Nigeria also has brains, we just decided not to move to a country where a rat race is bn lived in a regimented manner.




Where do dey do dna for less that 200k sir??

Say it loud.

micflo28:
Nigeria is a torture arena for men. Women have nothing to lose. The kids are there to continue to provide for them

You people won't take care of yourselves because you erroneously believe forming macho man is alpha male behaviour.


Men as a whole don't live long because testosterone makes them engage in more risky behaviour. Men drink and smoke more than women do.

Just look at the amount of male celebrities in Nigeria that have died due to kidney failure.

Take some accountability! Men deal with more health issues because they engage in more risky behaviour!

Godwin4444:
oga only simps get threatened with cheating

Before marriage my wife knows many girls trip for me even after marriage they bring food n goodies for me in shop, I have to b the one to tell them to stop it so it won't affect my marriage

I b fine boy n I get small change, once u see 2face u don see me n I come even get body build, I hope u understand now

So my wife no dey try rubbish cos she knows many wants me outside n even till now her friends keep asking her if she's sure am truly faithful cos they know me well

So if she threatened me with cheating I will send her away without hesitation, she's knows I am d trophy n I try to respect her too but no woman in d world can threaten me with that

For u to even think of threatening me with that I go change am for u badly

How can my wife say she wan go give her money to pastor, if I decide to b stupid like her n give my money to d pastor too how will d family survive?

U people should let your wife know that u people are in marriage together n must always b alive to responsibilities

No vex me abeg

We need to sort things at home n my wife will tell me she wants to give her money to pastor?
Wahala go happen

Me wey I no even like those scammers called pastor before

No, that pastor own na nonesense... But you see as you dey on top your game, she go dey observe. Just pray say you get wife wey love you naturally. If na jezebel, my brother she go dey observe until you come low one day either sickness or old age... She go still show you the shege. My prayer for every man be say, make your woman love you more than you love her.

AngelSlay:
Tracker you cannot remain single, you must go ye into the world and multiple.

I don't want to get married.I swear

Gerrard59:
No excuses, sir. Why should a man have four children in the first place? No matter how things are horrible, it is easier to manage with a child or two than four. That is an undeniable fact.

Any man who has four children then complains afterwards is to be blamed. There are a thousand and one ways to prevent childbearing. Nigerians should learn to be responsible for their lives. Everything is in their hands. This is not Tinubu or Jonathan. People should learn to be responsible for their lives. The country is hard, okay, why you go born four children? Is that Tinubu's fault?

If I had my way, I would implement a one or two child policy in Nigeria.

Jennyclay:
Why would he have 4 kids when he knows he’s broke and poor

Gone are those when people born as many as possible.

Take care of your wife and have just 1 or 2 kids that you can cater for without stress. Simple!!

I have been observing you for a while , how you always broke shame men, please who is your father?
Is he among the richest men in Nigeria? Who are your brothers? What is your family surname?

I’m sure you’re from an average or poor home and your father is one wretched fool who can not take care of his family responsibilities but you come online to fool not just yourself but your entire family.

Broke bitch.

laconicezone:
This is the best thread I have come across on nairaland this year, this is true talk, men often take lots of risk to take care of everyone around them at their own expense, it's time we think of taking care of ourselves.

Risks like smoking and drinking. And feeling too big to go the doctors.

ibechris:
Say it loud.

Don't mind him..

I didn't plan myself to be doing yes sir, yes sir at my mid thirties.. when I should be working independently, using g my brain to search for new opportunities and investing my funds instead of using everything to pay tax in another man's country.

Nooooooo

Bobodee09:
Is so bad that has a married man you can't even buy yourself new wears.

Throughout last year I couldn't get myself a new set of jeans trouser even tho I needed it badly despite having the money.
All the money I made last year 90% when into paying bills and household expenses.
It so crazy how you has a man you will have over 200k in your acc and you be scared to even buy yourself something of 10k cos of fear of the unknown.
In all of this my wife and kids still has many clothes they haven't worn I paid for you.

Last weekend my wife bought herself over 10 new shirt and when I saw it I reminded her how I couldn't even buy myself new jean....she told me nah me no wan buy nah.
It really hurt me cos whatever money I make the family expenses come first before my own personal needs but it isn't same for women.

I just feel marriage is design for men to suffer honestly.
People just taking from you and no one really care about what you need.

Change the narraTive by teaching Ur wife if she is working to contribute to ur purse as the administrator of the house just as u do to here, that will reduce some of the pressure on it and it will make her to love u more. Men love because they give; teach Ur wife to also show love to U by sending part of her income to U; when she does thst, mutual love will increase. Or rather maintain a joint acc

Jennyclay:
Why would he have 4 kids when he knows he’s broke and poor

Gone are those when people born as many as possible.

Take care of your wife and have just 1 or 2 kids that you can cater for without stress. Simple!!

Sense dey pain you.

occfx:
Every married man is seeing hell at the moment except those who are lucky with free flowing dough.

Just keep Amlodipin 10mg by your side and an anti depressant like Heineken or action bitters.

Amlodipin without prescription? Isn't that the height of drug abuse?

Bobodee09:
Is so bad that has a married man you can't even buy yourself new wears.

Throughout last year I couldn't get myself a new set of jeans trouser even tho I needed it badly despite having the money.
All the money I made last year 90% when into paying bills and household expenses.
It so crazy how you has a man you will have over 200k in your acc and you be scared to even buy yourself something of 10k cos of fear of the unknown.
In all of this my wife and kids still has many clothes they haven't worn I paid for you.

Last weekend my wife bought herself over 10 new shirt and when I saw it I reminded her how I couldn't even buy myself new jean....she told me nah me no wan buy nah.
It really hurt me cos whatever money I make the family expenses come first before my own personal needs but it isn't same for women.

I just feel marriage is design for men to suffer honestly.
People just taking from you and no one really care about what you need.

Many men are in the same shoes as you my brother. I checked my wardrobe and I realized I have only 3 trousers and 3 shirt's. My wife and children have bags and bags of clothes.

It's a pity my brother.

I have promised myself that, this slavery in the so-called marriage will end this year. I'm going to treat myself well this year.

ibechris:
Na men dey like to suffer.

When u are in your 20's start early and awake ur investment mindset.

If u can do this early enough,at your 40's ur passive income should be enough to take care of your family expenses while u continue to grind with life.

I learnt this technique at an early age...not from my father but from someone whom I lived with years back.

Example is. If u have 30million,invest it for one year,use the proceed to settle all family expenses for one year,after that u can rest and be happy. Not all the time,waiting for salaries that isn't enough.

May his soul rest in peace and may this serve as a lesson for all our able young men especially our teenagers.

For those who may not find this feasible,this theory is working for me and u can always adjust it to suit ur figures especially if u think the figure is too high. remember na advice ooooooh.

Una go just open mouth waaaa without much reasoning...
Na e easy and life doesn't happen, right?

highchief1:
no born more than two kids.and don’t over upgrade your life.i drive a 2014 car I can buy a 2024.Most of the time we start what we can’t finish.life no to hard na we Dey stress ourselves.i refuse to put my kids in the most expensive school even though I can afford it.i no Dey do pass myself and this have saved me from pressure a great deal.

Such wisdom!

You're the kind of man I am growing to be. Na only the money remain. Life is not all competition.

Bobodee09:
I really missed my bachelor days.....every weekend was pure enjoyments for me.

Have decided to take care of myself more .

Better do, you are hard working, dedicated family Man.
So you deserve it. Still take care of your family very well, don't let them lack.
But don't neglect yourself.

I have seen Men like you suffer serious ailments because they didn't take care of themselves, because they focused only on others and forgot about themselves.
Even Christ admonished us to Love your neighbor as yourself. But if you don't love yourself, how can you be able to Love others around you.

When you begin to take good care of yourself, it will even affect your relationship. Your woman will sit up knowing he's not married to a loser.

So take good care of your family but don't neglect yourself.

Peace

This past new year, I gave my wife and children 200kto buy clothes for themselves, ordinary boxer I did not buy for myself

Acidosis:
There was nothing else he could have done in that situation other than become a deadbeat dad or join a criminal group like the APC. Neither of the two options is appropriate for a sane, responsible man.

^^^

GboyegaD:
Amlodipin without prescription? Isn't that the height of drug abuse?

You saw that too. Later if he dies before his time, his colleagues will start looking for a woman to blame.

TrackerSK:
I don't want to get married.I swear

Good for you just ensure you have money like donjazzy