₦airaland Forum

debbydams:
all this small small children sha.. If dem don buy small android phone give Una, na to dey run Una mouth anyhow

When I joined Nairaland, you were still in your mum’s womb, go and play with your mates outside

NexLoaded:
Since you guys are advising her and the children to stay with a broke addict, may your girl child or your sister marry such a man. Only then would your understand that the brother is actually trying to help her.

To the op, if I am your brother and after giving you such instructions and you ignore them, you will NEVER call me again for any financial assistance. Carry your cross.

1. Did your mom abandoned your dad when he was broke? Go to your mom and ask her.

2. Go and ask obi Cubana why he can never do without his wife.

You are a noise maker. How much do you even have in you bank account? Cho cho cho cho if your sister refuse to listen to you, she should never call you again.

That you have today doesn't mean you will have tommorrow. Is not a curse but fact. That useless husband you see today can even be you boss tommorrow.

silibaba:
1. Did your mom abandoned your dad when he was broke? Go to your mom and ask her.

2. Go and ask obi Cubana why he can never do without his wife.

You are a noise maker. How much do you even have in you bank account? Cho cho cho cho if your sister refuse to listen to you, she should never call you again.

That you have today doesn't mean you will have tommorrow. Is not a curse but fact. That useless husband you see today can even be you boss tommorrow.

Super story

@op you will forever regret it in life if you failed to listen to your brother.

Villa12:
Super story

@op you will forever regret it in life if you failed to listen to your brother.

People like you will catch your wife pant down with another man and you will still beg her to stay.


Why am I even replying genZ like you?

silibaba:
People like you will catch your wife pant down with another man and you will still beg her to stay.


Why am I even replying genZ like you?

You're free to accept your woman for sleeping around or being an Addict. Don't impose it on everyone else. Apart from his irresponsible addict, the wife family is the one bankrolling the family. You're not wiser than the brother advising his beloved sister to leave the marriage. If everyone reject you in life, the family you came from can never reject you. Blood is thicker than water. Leaving him wouldn't end the life of the man nor the life of the woman. She's leaving for peace and sanity. Separation and divorce ìs part of life and not a death sentences. Her siblings understand her much more better than you and i.

Villa12:
You're free to accept your woman for sleeping around or being an Addict. Don't impose it on everyone else. Apart from his irresponsible addict, the wife family is the one bankrolling the family. You're not wiser than the brother advising his beloved sister to leave the marriage. If everyone reject you in life, the family you came from can never reject you. Blood is thicker than water. Leaving him wouldn't end the life of the man nor the life of the woman. She's leaving for peace and sanity. Separation and divorce ìs part of life and not a death sentences. Her siblings understand her much more better than you and i.

Okay, I hear.

Are you not addicted to bet9ja?

silibaba:
Okay, I hear.

Are you not addicted to bet9ja?

I don't even know how to play it. Say something else uncle

Villa12:
I don't even know how to play it. Say something else uncle

You never talk true. When you talk true I will ask if you don't get drunk.

floss:
When I joined Nairaland, you were still in your mum’s womb, go and play with your mates outside

oya come collect award.. Arugbo ojo

silibaba:
Don't let any person deceive you outta ur marriage ooo

This is the time your husband needs you the most. He is addicted to bet9ja which I guess but is because he wants to win and use the money to impress you and all of the family.

hummm

debbydams:
oya come collect award.. Arugbo ojo

Now we know who they got android phone for… don’t go and be useful to yourself and your parents Arugbo ojo

floss:
Now we know who they got android phone for… don’t go and be useful to yourself and your parents Arugbo ojo

don't be stupid..
I didn't mention your parent in my Conversations..

silibaba:
You never talk true. When you talk true I will ask if you don't get drunk.

in your tiny brain you think all guys play bet or gamble? No wonder you are advising op to remain in her marriage. I'm pretty sure you also believe all guys are into cyber fraud (yahoo yahoo) I really pity who dey meet you for advice honestly.

Villa12:
in your tiny brain you think all guys play bet or gamble? No wonder you are advising op to remain in her marriage. I'm pretty sure you also believe all guys are into cyber fraud (yahoo yahoo) I really pity who dey meet you for advice honestly.

I SEE YOU HAVE A LARGER BRAIN IN QUOTE.

I MENTIONED BET9JA, E PAIN YOU.

if you must advise the lady to leave her matrimonial home, can you take her in? Forget the brother.

Scumbag

Savingrace678:
Hello nairalanders, pls I need matured mind on this.
I created this account to post this.

My marriage has been stressful and draining.
I have really suffered if not for the help of my elderest brother, we would have died by now.
My husband has been in addiction since we got married 5yrs ago. that has never allowed him to take care of us. In 5yr we married, he has changed More than 5 jobs all wasted effort. We have two twine children. A boy and a girl. 4urs.
His addiction has been the reason I never want to have another child ever since then.

Right now my husband's uncle, a father figured to him has invited him to come home to the village, so they can advise him and my elderest brother has asked me to pack my things and the children, as soon as my husband left for the village, he will relocate us and my husband will not have access to us again.
And he said, if I declined, he will take his hand off my matter. He has been the one taking care of our rent, school fees and upkeep as my husband's money goes to addiction.

My fear now is, my children are so used to their father and I'm afraid if they can cop without their father. Especially my son.
Secondly, I'm so scared that I don't know how I'm going to handle more brokness in my life
My life is so scattered right now.
And lastly, I don't want my brother to take off his hands off me. He's the only person helping me out with my mistake.

There is a big problem in uoir marriage and the solution is there and you already have a messiah in the person of your senior brother, who has given you the best advice on the way forward

But your on exposure and timidity wants you to continue suffering

Assuming your husband left you, won't your son survive

Well for your best interests follow the advice given to you by your brother failing to do so, he will watch you suffer into depression

People like you don't need advice because you will not know the value of the advice

Helpout12345:
If what you describe about your husband is true, I agree he needs help. He should seek help as quickly as possible. I agree you might want to give him some space for now while he seek helps so that your children don't learn his addiction as normal.

I don't agree with your brother trying to prevent your husband having access to his children or sounding like he wants you to abandon your husband at his lowest point.

You and the children can go with your brother for now while your husband gets help. Then keep in touch with your husband on the progress of his treatment and rehabilitation

Best advice

silibaba:
I SEE YOU HAVE A LARGER BRAIN IN QUOTE.

I MENTIONED BET9JA, E PAIN YOU.

if you must advise the lady to leave her matrimonial home, can you take her in? Forget the brother.

Scumbag

So are you going to feed them, pay their rent and school fees.

debbydams:
don't be stupid..
I didn't mention your parent in my Conversations..

Oya don’t cry, just go and play with your mates outside

Savingrace678:
Hello nairalanders, pls I need matured mind on this.
I created this account to post this.

My marriage has been stressful and draining.
I have really suffered if not for the help of my elderest brother, we would have died by now.
My husband has been in addiction since we got married 5yrs ago. that has never allowed him to take care of us. In 5yr we married, he has changed More than 5 jobs all wasted effort. We have two twine children. A boy and a girl. 4urs.
His addiction has been the reason I never want to have another child ever since then.

Right now my husband's uncle, a father figured to him has invited him to come home to the village, so they can advise him and my elderest brother has asked me to pack my things and the children, as soon as my husband left for the village, he will relocate us and my husband will not have access to us again.
And he said, if I declined, he will take his hand off my matter. He has been the one taking care of our rent, school fees and upkeep as my husband's money goes to addiction.

My fear now is, my children are so used to their father and I'm afraid if they can cop without their father. Especially my son.
Secondly, I'm so scared that I don't know how I'm going to handle more brokness in my life
My life is so scattered right now.
And lastly, I don't want my brother to take off his hands off me. He's the only person helping me out with my mistake.

Run away and free the man. E deserve peace

Cowbell521:
Run away and free the man. E deserve peace

Abi o! OP is not doing the man any favors by remaining married to him; neither is OP doing herself a favor by remaining with a deadbeat as a husband. OP, when you are tired of torturing yourself, you will free the man and yourself.

No matter what, don't use only one side of the story to judge a matter.
We didn't hear from your husband.
As for your brother, he is not doing the right thing.Why would he deny your children access to their father?
In Urhobo, we do say, you do the right thing in the right way.
I am sure ,you did a traditional marriage. If you do, so must call for a family meeting of both sides( yours and your husband) and the elders of both families will hear from both of you.If there is no hope of change of lifestyle from your hubby, the needful can be done amicably.
Don't let emotions to becloud your sense of reasoning.

Savingrace678:
Hello nairalanders, pls I need matured mind on this.
I created this account to post this.

My marriage has been stressful and draining.
I have really suffered if not for the help of my elderest brother, we would have died by now.
My husband has been in addiction since we got married 5yrs ago. that has never allowed him to take care of us. In 5yr we married, he has changed More than 5 jobs all wasted effort. We have two twine children. A boy and a girl. 4urs.
His addiction has been the reason I never want to have another child ever since then.

Right now my husband's uncle, a father figured to him has invited him to come home to the village, so they can advise him and my elderest brother has asked me to pack my things and the children, as soon as my husband left for the village, he will relocate us and my husband will not have access to us again.
And he said, if I declined, he will take his hand off my matter. He has been the one taking care of our rent, school fees and upkeep as my husband's money goes to addiction.

My fear now is, my children are so used to their father and I'm afraid if they can cop without their father. Especially my son.
Secondly, I'm so scared that I don't know how I'm going to handle more brokness in my life
My life is so scattered right now.
And lastly, I don't want my brother to take off his hands off me. He's the only person helping me out with my mistake.

The last sentence lies ur answer

silibaba:
I SEE YOU HAVE A LARGER BRAIN IN QUOTE.

I MENTIONED BET9JA, E PAIN YOU.

if you must advise the lady to leave her matrimonial home, can you take her in? Forget the brother.

Scumbag

Op will leave. You can go kpai yourself. Give your sister to the man to marry free of charge.

ezugegere:
So are you going to feed them, pay their rent and school fees.

@silibaba no get sense na. He's a dummy. Ignore him

frozen70:
There is a big problem in uoir marriage and the solution is there and you already have a messiah in the person of your senior brother, who has given you the best advice on the way forward

But your on exposure and timidity wants you to continue suffering

Assuming your husband left you, won't your son survive

Well for your best interests follow the advice given to you by your brother failing to do so, he will watch you suffer into depression

People like you don't need advice because you will not know the value of the advice

Noted

Villa12:
Op will leave. You can go kpai yourself. Give your sister to the man to marry free of charge.

and give your brother to the intending single mother.

Villa12:
@silibaba no get sense na. He's a dummy. Ignore him

Foolish in- ToTo



Femi way you dey find, na my friend oh
Jude way dey behind, na my pale too oh
Kennedy nko, na my friend oh
You go dey waka from ondo to uyo, sokoto
O ti so o o oi

So na true, say all the things way people dey talk about you
All of them you dey do true true
Na your conscience dey judge you
O fi owo e se ra e
Na true, say you dey do it like am too settle
You come dey do like say you too dey faithfull
Na your conscience dey judge you
O fi owo e se ra e

silibaba:
and give your brother to the intending single mother.

she already had kids. She doesn't need to remarry since she's lucky to have a good support system. You can only bark but that wouldn't change anything. The man's family should look after their grown son with addiction. Shikena

Villa12:
she already had kids. She doesn't need to remarry since she's lucky to have a good support system. You can only bark but that wouldn't change anything. The man's family should look after their grown son with addiction. Shikena

She told you she don't need a man around her. Do you know if her libido in much intensive?

For how long is the support system going to be?

Is not to promise heaven and earth..

Is the support system sustainable?

Savingrace678:
Hello nairalanders, pls I need matured mind on this.
I created this account to post this.

My marriage has been stressful and draining.
I have really suffered if not for the help of my elderest brother, we would have died by now.
My husband has been in addiction since we got married 5yrs ago. that has never allowed him to take care of us. In 5yr we married, he has changed More than 5 jobs all wasted effort. We have two twine children. A boy and a girl. 4urs.
His addiction has been the reason I never want to have another child ever since then.

Right now my husband's uncle, a father figured to him has invited him to come home to the village, so they can advise him and my elderest brother has asked me to pack my things and the children, as soon as my husband left for the village, he will relocate us and my husband will not have access to us again.
And he said, if I declined, he will take his hand off my matter. He has been the one taking care of our rent, school fees and upkeep as my husband's money goes to addiction.

My fear now is, my children are so used to their father and I'm afraid if they can cop without their father. Especially my son.
Secondly, I'm so scared that I don't know how I'm going to handle more brokness in my life
My life is so scattered right now.
And lastly, I don't want my brother to take off his hands off me. He's the only person helping me out with my mistake.

Separation

Inform your husband family that you're not divorcing him but Separation. They should look after their son/brother and ensure he's completely healed and also he should get a job or business to sustain the family as your brother cannot continue to cater for his wife and kids. Let them know you'll keep in touch with them and you're ready to return once there's evidence that he's completely out of the addiction and has a source of livelihood to cater for the family. They might not want you to leave but don't listen to them and don't leave your kids for them please. If your brother is the one bankrolling your family without the support of the man's family then such family is not responsible. You can decide not to come back again. It's your choice but i implore you to listen to your brother. Someone supporting you cannot mislead you. I will do same if you're my sister.

silibaba:
She told you she don't need a man around her. Do you know if her libido in much intensive?

For how long is the support system going to be?

Is not to promise heaven and earth..

Is the support system sustainable?

The support system is definitely sustainable, if a brother can be feeding and paying the bills of his married sister with her family, then tell me what such a brother would do having advised the sister to leave for her sanity and peace? He will definitely set her up to be independent. He probably didn't set her up because of the irresponsible husband. He understood the irresponsible husband would definitely not let her grow with his addiction. It is common sense