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"He Left Me, So He Must Pay Spousal Support!" Read This Before You Go To Court - Family (3) - Nairaland

Nairaland ForumNairaland GeneralFamily"He Left Me, So He Must Pay Spousal Support!" Read This Before You Go To Court (18481 Views)

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Re: "He Left Me, So He Must Pay Spousal Support!" Read This Before You Go To Court by Mear23: 8:58pm On May 23, 2025
I am not justifying the man.
But i pray you don't fall into a wrong hand.
One of the solid pillar of marriage is trust, once this is broken in marriage, the ship can capsize irrespective of who is involved.

Kobojunkie:
1. Oh, so the pastor husband, whose faults are equally plenty, is not genuinely born-again? 😄

2. What gives you the impression that a past was hidden in this case, though? Are you insinuating that the pastor husband who claims he sniffs his wife's panties whenever she comes home does so because of some hidden past of his sniffing women's panties? 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Re: "He Left Me, So He Must Pay Spousal Support!" Read This Before You Go To Court by Mear23: 9:03pm On May 23, 2025
Let me cite a case I know for you.
Two so called believers were in courtship. During courtship, the sister said se only had sex once, it's on the wedding night that the bro discovered the woman lied. Till today, the home has nit settled.

To avoid had I known, when it comes to marriage, don't give anyone an impression of what you are not.

Kobojunkie:
1. Oh, so the pastor husband, whose faults are equally plenty, is not genuinely born-again? 😄

2. What gives you the impression that a past was hidden in this case, though? Are you insinuating that the pastor husband who claims he sniffs his wife's panties whenever she comes home does so because of some hidden past of his sniffing women's panties? 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Re: "He Left Me, So He Must Pay Spousal Support!" Read This Before You Go To Court by Kobojunkie: 9:10pm On May 23, 2025
Mear23:
➜I am not justifying the man. But i pray you don't fall into a wrong hand.
➜ One of the solid pillar of marriage is trust, once this is broken in marriage, the ship can capsize irrespective of who is involved.
1. You don't need to pray such useless prayers because everyone is bound to, at some point to fall into the wrong hands/path/ditch, etc. It is all a part of the human experience; no one can, by way of prayers or anxieties, avoid that. Rather, it is by gaining knowledge and understanding of human behavior, etc., that one is best able to maneuver past many of those pitfalls in this life. undecided

2. Here's the revelation for you. Even if the man and woman were born and raised in the same house/compound as neighbors, attended the same schools from the beginning, sat in the same classes, hung out with the same group of friends, came home at the same time each day, and then eventually dated and married to each other, what you call trust would continue to evade them. Knowing your partner's past has nothing to do with trusting your partner. Even if you could read your partner's mind, you would still not be able to trust your partner. Why? Because humans cannot trust each other. We are born that way, and we die that way. Trust is erroneously believed to be a pillar when in fact it is not. undecided

Think about it. If the divorce rate(and marriage abandonment rates) for those in your churches mirrors the divorce(abandonment rate) that is found among those outside of your churches including those who don't even believe in any deity, doesn't this here serve as definitive proof that whatever is wrong with marriages between churchians is also what is wrong in the marriages of those who don't have your church ideas, meaning it is more a human problem than a pillars problem? undecided
Re: "He Left Me, So He Must Pay Spousal Support!" Read This Before You Go To Court by DeeScan: 9:10pm On May 23, 2025
If this is not vice versa then it's total shiit...
Re: "He Left Me, So He Must Pay Spousal Support!" Read This Before You Go To Court by Kobojunkie: 9:13pm On May 23, 2025
Mear23:
➜Let me cite a case I know for you. Two so called believers were in courtship. During courtship, the sister said se only had sex once, it's on the wedding night that the bro discovered the woman lied. Till today, the home has nit settled. To avoid had I known, when it comes to marriage, don't give anyone an impression of what you are not.
Wait a second.... How did he make this discovery of his? So the believer brother was some sort of sex expert before marriage, or what? undecided
Re: "He Left Me, So He Must Pay Spousal Support!" Read This Before You Go To Court by DeeScan: 9:15pm On May 23, 2025
Where's our resident baby lawyer when you need her ..

.

Folake4u .

Help us understand, if this law is vice versa or not
And in what way can we beat this law in courst against our scorned spouses ...
Re: "He Left Me, So He Must Pay Spousal Support!" Read This Before You Go To Court by Mear23: 9:33pm On May 23, 2025
Certain things can be learned even without sex.
Elementary biology is there, books on such topics are numerous too

Kobojunkie:
Wait a second.... How did he make this discovery of his? So the believer brother was some sort of sex expert before marriage, or what? undecided
Re: "He Left Me, So He Must Pay Spousal Support!" Read This Before You Go To Court by Kobojunkieee: 9:39pm On May 23, 2025
Mear23:
➜Certain things can be learned even without sex. Elementary biology is there, books on such topics are numerous too
. Elementary biology instead insists that it is impossible to tell whether a woman has had sex or not by simply inspecting her vagina. So, again, how did he make this discovery of his? So the believer brother was some sort of sex expert/mentalist or mindreader before marriage, or what? undecided undecided
Re: "He Left Me, So He Must Pay Spousal Support!" Read This Before You Go To Court by LawWithEbele(op): 10:13pm On May 23, 2025
Baronthecelebri:
What about baby mama
Spousal support is for once lawfully married but now divorced or separated spouse. A baby mama is out of this equation. The best baby manner could file for is child's support. This is were it has been established that the man is the actual father of the child.
Re: "He Left Me, So He Must Pay Spousal Support!" Read This Before You Go To Court by Ofekongsk(m): 10:45pm On May 23, 2025
To hell with such law even if it exists. If we separate, better go spread leg for another person make e pay your bills oh. Na only child support I understand.
Nonsense & ingredients undecided
Re: "He Left Me, So He Must Pay Spousal Support!" Read This Before You Go To Court by Nobody: 11:19pm On May 23, 2025
maxiuc:
cheesy

I will create a topic on this and I want straightforward answers

My cousin bro got married to a woman that secret lured him into Court marriage and this is a girl that brought absolutely nothing it was my bro that trained her in university and ever since the court wedding this lady has been misbehaving and I got a clue from a closer friend of hers about her reasons for the court marriage and my cousin brother is very naive and stubborn type sometimes I used to tell him that no be to get money you get sense that's what he refuses to understand and he act to be on top the situation not knowing that the situation is on top him grin grin angry ,now the lady is kind of doing anything she wants to do kwatakwata if Dem divorce she will get a share from my cousin brother properties, she contributed absolutely nothing to the wealth of this my brother. now what does the Nigerian laws says about this should Incase divorce comes can she lay claim of any of my Brothers properties that she never contributed into and all this properties has been there before she came in as wife...
Nope,it doesn't work that way.

Many people are ignorant of the law just like the OP lawyer said.

Court marriage isn't an automatic ticket to get a share of a man's wealth after divorce.

Let me summarize it. Incase of court divorce:

The woman don't own a share the the properties given to the man by his parents, family members or friends.

The woman don't own a share to the properties the man had before he married her.

She only have share among the properties and wealth the man acquired during their marital contract under the terms and conditions that she can prove that she contributed to the wealth and properties. For instance she contributed money that was used to build a house or company.

Another reason why a man may be instructed to compensate a woman after divorce is when the woman can prove that she lost her source of income like business or job as a result of the marriage - for instance, a lady quit her job so she could have enough time to take care of the house. Or she quit her job and relocated to another town because of marriage.

The house the couple lived together can sometimes be sold and money divided among them or given to the women based on some terms and conditions and proofs of contributions.
Re: "He Left Me, So He Must Pay Spousal Support!" Read This Before You Go To Court by jideakpan1: 12:57am On May 24, 2025
Alimony in many parts of the world is paid only after the couple have been married for a number of years among other conditions.
In Delaware, US, it is 10 years of marriage upwards.
You still have to prove that you were not able to work and earn and have contributed to the other person's life eg, you took care of the children while he went to school to upgrade himself for that big pay!
Most Nigerian women in the US can't claim that so they go for Child support instead.
Re: "He Left Me, So He Must Pay Spousal Support!" Read This Before You Go To Court by MrRight007: 5:23am On May 24, 2025
I swear! marriage is now a scam polluted by imperialism. Baby mama arrangement is the best! Imagine whiz kid paying spousal support?? Please to u guys, don't fall for the trap of stupid court marriage where a woman cheats on you, files for divorce and is suddenly rewarded.
Re: "He Left Me, So He Must Pay Spousal Support!" Read This Before You Go To Court by LawWithEbele(op): 8:42am On May 24, 2025
maxiuc:
cheesy

I will create a topic on this and I want straightforward answers

My cousin bro got married to a woman that secret lured him into Court marriage and this is a girl that brought absolutely nothing it was my bro that trained her in university and ever since the court wedding this lady has been misbehaving and I got a clue from a closer friend of hers about her reasons for the court marriage and my cousin brother is very naive and stubborn type sometimes I used to tell him that no be to get money you get sense that's what he refuses to understand and he act to be on top the situation not knowing that the situation is on top him grin grin angry ,now the lady is kind of doing anything she wants to do kwatakwata if Dem divorce she will get a share from my cousin brother properties, she contributed absolutely nothing to the wealth of this my brother. now what does the Nigerian laws says about this should Incase divorce comes can she lay claim of any of my Brothers properties that she never contributed into and all this properties has been there before she came in as wife...
Sharing of properties after divorce is not automatic. You have to ask for it. The court in deciding who gets what applies the"fair and reasonable" formula. Do for the girl to succeed, she has to prove that she contributed to the acquisition of those properties. However, some courts have interpreted contribution to mean financial contribution, while other have taken cognizance of non financial contribution. Whichever way it goes, kindly note that statutory marriage is not an automatic ticket to having a share in a man's property. You must prove that you contributed to its acquisition
Re: "He Left Me, So He Must Pay Spousal Support!" Read This Before You Go To Court by Love800(m): 9:04am On May 24, 2025
What's the difference between spousal support and child support?
LawWithEbele:
Spousal support is for once lawfully married but now divorced or separated spouse. A baby mama is out of this equation. The best baby manner could file for is child's support. This is were it has been established that the man is the actual father of the child.
Re: "He Left Me, So He Must Pay Spousal Support!" Read This Before You Go To Court by Love800(m): 9:08am On May 24, 2025
Why selling the home that both of them lived in?
ediko5:
Nope,it doesn't work that way.

Many people are ignorant of the law just like the OP lawyer said.

Court marriage isn't an automatic ticket to get a share of a man's wealth after divorce.

Let me summarize it. Incase of court divorce:

The woman don't own a share the the properties given to the man by his parents, family members or friends.

The woman don't own a share to the properties the man had before he married her.

She only have share among the properties and wealth the man acquired during their marital contract under the terms and conditions that she can prove that she contributed to the wealth and properties. For instance she contributed money that was used to build a house or company.

Another reason why a man may be instructed to compensate a woman after divorce is when the woman can prove that she lost her source of income like business or job as a result of the marriage - for instance, a lady quit her job so she could have enough time to take care of the house. Or she quit her job and relocated to another town because of marriage.

The house the couple lived together can sometimes be sold and money divided among them or given to the women based on some terms and conditions and proofs of contributions.
Re: "He Left Me, So He Must Pay Spousal Support!" Read This Before You Go To Court by Love800(m): 9:10am On May 24, 2025
What's the difference between court and church marriage?
MrRight007:
I swear! marriage is now a scam polluted by imperialism. Baby mama arrangement is the best! Imagine whiz kid paying spousal support?? Please to u guys, don't fall for the trap of stupid court marriage where a woman cheats on you, files for divorce and is suddenly rewarded.
Re: "He Left Me, So He Must Pay Spousal Support!" Read This Before You Go To Court by Nobody: 12:05pm On May 24, 2025
Love800:
Why selling the home that both of them lived in?
It all depends, the house can be sold for the money to be shared among them or sometimes the man may be instructed to settle her the equivalent. Most times the.house both of them occupied is usually considered as a joint venture - for instance, the wife may have contributed to the building or maintenance of the house(like I said under terms and conditions of proof)
Re: "He Left Me, So He Must Pay Spousal Support!" Read This Before You Go To Court by LawWithEbele(op): 12:29pm On May 24, 2025
Chickensoup:
If the wife leaves the husband, will she pay as well or it's only apply to men?
The law applies to both parties. However, in practice, men hardly claim spousal support from their wives.
Re: "He Left Me, So He Must Pay Spousal Support!" Read This Before You Go To Court by delpee(f): 1:59pm On May 24, 2025
maxiuc:
cheesy

I will create a topic on this and I want straightforward answers

My cousin bro got married to a woman that secret lured him into Court marriage and this is a girl that brought absolutely nothing it was my bro that trained her in university and ever since the court wedding this lady has been misbehaving and I got a clue from a closer friend of hers about her reasons for the court marriage and my cousin brother is very naive and stubborn type sometimes I used to tell him that no be to get money you get sense that's what he refuses to understand and he act to be on top the situation not knowing that the situation is on top him grin grin angry ,now the lady is kind of doing anything she wants to do kwatakwata if Dem divorce she will get a share from my cousin brother properties, she contributed absolutely nothing to the wealth of this my brother. now what does the Nigerian laws says about this should Incase divorce comes can she lay claim of any of my Brothers properties that she never contributed into and all this properties has been there before she came in as wife...
Getting a share of the properties isn't automatic. Does she have proof of her contribution?
Re: "He Left Me, So He Must Pay Spousal Support!" Read This Before You Go To Court by Jandminded: 5:42pm On May 24, 2025
DeepSight:
And I just explained where it counts.

I hope u know bigamy is a crime in Nigeria.

Now tell me who you have seen being prosecuted for it?
How many people have been indicted?
Re: "He Left Me, So He Must Pay Spousal Support!" Read This Before You Go To Court by DeepSight(m): 6:05pm On May 24, 2025
Jandminded:
How many people have been indicted?
That's the point I was making. I don't know of any. So in short some laws are ineffective here because they are culturally misplaced.
Re: "He Left Me, So He Must Pay Spousal Support!" Read This Before You Go To Court by Jandminded: 11:55pm On May 24, 2025
DeepSight:
That's the point I was making. I don't know of any. So in short some laws are ineffective here because they are culturally misplaced.
The law is effective, people don't usually charge offenders.
Re: "He Left Me, So He Must Pay Spousal Support!" Read This Before You Go To Court by Dogalmighty17: 9:03am On May 25, 2025
Barrister Ebele has a very rich website where she discusses things like this and more. She's opened my eyes to lot.
Re: "He Left Me, So He Must Pay Spousal Support!" Read This Before You Go To Court by DDDDDav: 11:15am On May 25, 2025
QuinQ:
Good one Ebele. How about non-court marriage?
And how about the other person has plenty assets and money but no visible or provable means of income?



U right. In Nigeria they'll award like 5K per month grin, the same amount it's been since long - as if they don't know Naira has lost a lot of value!
Are you serious with the awarding of 5k per month? Have you seen any case of such or similar? I would like to hear from you.
Re: "He Left Me, So He Must Pay Spousal Support!" Read This Before You Go To Court by Love800(m): 8:30pm On May 26, 2025
Wow.

Thanks so much.
ediko5:
It all depends, the house can be sold for the money to be shared among them or sometimes the man may be instructed to settle her the equivalent. Most times the.house both of them occupied is usually considered as a joint venture - for instance, the wife may have contributed to the building or maintenance of the house(like I said under terms and conditions of proof)
Re: "He Left Me, So He Must Pay Spousal Support!" Read This Before You Go To Court by LawWithEbele(op): 2:04am On Jul 01, 2025
That's a misconception. Statutory marriage is not automatic passport to have a share in your spouse's property. Before court will settle any property in her favour or make an order in her favour with respect to the personal properties of her hus, she MUST prove that she contributed to its acquisition. Some courts however have construed the contribution to mean only financial contribution, whereas others have considered none financial contribution like child care, home keeping etc. DThe beli
delpee:
Getting a share of the properties isn't automatic. Does she have proof of her contribution?
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