₦airaland Forum

Lincoln4u:
You don’t know the level of the father involvement in her life, the child in question is 9 years old, she is able to know her right and left. I can boldly tell you she doesn’t recognize her father, that's because he doesn’t care and he has never bn involve in her life
I left Nigeria 2years ago he never went to her to visit her Knowles fully well I’m not around, so how is my move affect a relationship that wasn’t there

Oh...so u've not been around for a while.. ..ahhh !!!!! It will be hard proving the child is better leaving Nigeria with you since someone else has been caring for the kid all this time(a whole 2 years)....

This ur case get K-leg ooo...(Apologies justwise)

The ECO may likely be suspecting child trafficking ... Especially if u ddnt submit any proof enough proof the child is urs beyond a birth certificate and if the sole custody letter has a recent date.

...The success of this type of visa rest largely on making the eco feel 1)the child is urs, (2)the child is better with you in the UK, (3) the place she has been living or the conditions while u were away is no longer convenient.....

Someone with a case similar to yours two years back was able to get the visa approved on medical grounds.... but that was because the child is sickle cell and was able to argue the child is better off in the UK, and that the semi illiterate grand mother who has been caring for the child was not best suited for care in the long run...he added so many supporting documents including the evidence of repeated hospitalization of the kid...

I don't know how u want to argue yours...it's hard .....but not impossible.... Good luck

Santa2:
Just as the US offloads their $7500 EV grant, the UK onboards theirs. Baba spend this money and buy brand new naa.. Next of kin no go reason all these thing O.

Does NOK want asset or liability........ 😂

advanceDNA:
Oh...so u've not been around for a while.. ..ahhh !!!!! It will be hard proving the child is better leaving Nigeria with you since someone else has been caring for the kid all this time(a whole 2 years)....

This ur case get K-leg ooo...(Apologies justwise)

The ECO may likely be suspecting child trafficking ... Especially if u ddnt submit any proof enough proof the child is urs beyond a birth certificate and if the sole custody letter has a recent date.

...The success of this type of visa rest largely on making the eco feel 1)the child is urs, (2)the child is better with you in the UK, (3) the place she has been living or the conditions while u were away is no longer convenient.....

Someone with a case similar to yours two years back was able to get the visa approved on medical grounds.... but that was because the child is sickle cell and was able to argue the child is better off in the UK, and that the semi illiterate grand mother who has been caring for the child was not best suited for care in the long run...he added so many supporting documents including the evidence of repeated hospitalization of the kid...

I don't know how u want to argue yours...it's hard .....but not impossible.... Good luck

I left her for 2 years because my course is for 2yrs with lot of clinical placement unpaid , I just finished uni February this year and I waited still I get COS and I applied for her immediately
I submitted a lot like of pictures from pregnancy still the day I left Nigeria

Lincoln4u:
I left her for 2 years because my course is for 2yrs with lot of clinical placement unpaid , I just finished uni February this year and I waited still I get COS and I applied for her immediately
I submitted a lot like of pictures from pregnancy still the day I left Nigeria

I understand and I believe you....but I'm not the one that needs convincing..it's the entry clearance officer.... and sadly, some Nigerians have made things difficult for others...

You can also add a cover note to explain why you had to leave for the UK without urr kid and you now more than ready to be reunited..
. be original as u can.....u can even add that you are open to DNA test so they know she's urs......a mother shouldn't be hindered from her child because of some bunch of rules

One more advice...don't apply for administrative review...they will make u wait for forever to get a response....make a fresh application when u are ready ..

advanceDNA:
I understand and I believe you....but I'm not the one that needs convincing..it's the entry clearance officer.... and sadly, some Nigerians have made things difficult for others...

You can also add a cover note to explain why you had to leave for the UK without urr kid and you now more than ready to be reunited..
. be original as u can.....u can even add that you are open to DNA test so they know she's urs......a mother shouldn't be hindered from her child because of some bunch of rules

One more advice...don't apply for administrative review...they will make u wait for forever to get a response....make a fresh application when u are ready ..

Thank you I’m reapplying i just don’t want to make same mistake but so far no lead

Lincoln4u:
Thank you I’m reapplying i just don’t want to make same mistake but so far no lead

Upload your refusal letter to Chatgpt, give it a detailed summary of all the evidences your provided and a background on why you just applied now. Tell it you want to reapply, ask it to draft a befitting cover letter that would make the ECO convinced and ask it to recommend any additional documentation that might help your application. What ever response you get, update it with your human touch. I pray you get success in your reapplication

Lincoln4u:
Thank you I’m reapplying i just don’t want to make same mistake but so far no lead

Your case is complex. Contact a lawyer. It’ll have a cost attached but will be worth it.

Elders, as an international student who arrived in the UK in March 2025, how can I improve my credit score of 549? I’ve tried applying for credit cards with Capital One and Tesco, I was approved, but they require a UK driver’s license to verify my identity, which I don’t have yet. I’d really appreciate any advice or help.

Lincoln4u:
You don’t know the level of the father involvement in her life, the child in question is 9 years old, she is able to know her right and left. I can boldly tell you she doesn’t recognize her father, that's because he doesn’t care and he has never bn involve in her life
I left Nigeria 2years ago he never went to her to visit her Knowles fully well I’m not around, so how is my move affect a relationship that wasn’t there

A little explanation like this will make a different in your visa application, what you stated here is believable and its very common.

Like i said before..traveling with kids out of Nigeria or Africa in general as a single parent is very difficult because of too many cases of child trafficking, before 2018 a DNA test will be requested by the embassy but they have stopped that now for legal reasons .

This refusal has given you areas to concentrate on when reapplying, resubmit all legal documents you submitting before and more if you have.

You stated that you submitted sole responsibility document, however the ECO did not acknowledge this in that refusal letter, you may have to mention this in your letter to the new ECO who will be handling your application.

Don't forget that you need to make some arrayments here for the child and attach the evidence with the application....things like accommodation, school, childcare and explain how you will juggle her care with your full time job.

All the very best.

ogify1:
Elders, as an international student who arrived in the UK in March 2025, how can I improve my credit score of 549? I’ve tried applying for credit cards with Capital One and Tesco, I was approved, but they require a UK driver’s license to verify my identity, which I don’t have yet. I’d really appreciate any advice or help.

Get a provisional driving license! Go online and find out more. But apart from driver’s license are you sure your international passport will not suffice

giselle237:
Speaking from a place of knowledge as I have handled some of these. If you need the father’s consent then that’s no more sole custody/responsibility and therein nullifies the court order for sole custody.
That also means father must be contacted concerning everything for the child.
In child custody stuff, sole custody means one parent gets to make all the important decisions about the kid’s life and the kid mostly lives with that parent. The other parent might still get to visit or stay in touch, but they usually can’t make big calls about things like school or healthcare.
Sole responsibility further streamlines this. Only the one parent is RESPONSIBLE for the child and makes ALL the decisions.
Sadly, your information is GROSSLY incorrect and should be disregarded. Child’s father’s consent will damage this application 1000% more. Cheers.

Sole custody does not generally allow the custodial parent to take the child out of the country without the non-custodial parent's involvement and sometimes agreement.

Goke7:
Get a provisional driving license! Go online and find out more. But apart from driver’s license are you sure your international passport will not suffice

I tried using my passport, they insisted on the DL

Goke7:
The jobs you are thinking of is not the one for that purpose!

The people bringing them in are not stupid they know where the need is. France just recently granted asylum leave to folks from Gaza. All these things are transactional and not charity as the locals or citizens think. I pray one day a govt especially in Britain will be courageous enough to strike the right balance in the system without having to deceiving the populace.

Unfortunately, that's not going to happen.
The same way that UK governments of all stripes will never curtail the welfare state or summon up the courage to match tax revenue to expenditure - there will never be an honest conversation with the public.

Schools are out and people now have time on their hands. Let's see what this summer brings.

Lincoln4u:
Thank you I’m reapplying i just don’t want to make same mistake but so far no lead

You won’t make any mistakes. Stay confident and ignore the naysayers. Even here in the UK, in the field of paediatrics, moms are recognised as the primary caregivers for their children, and your situation will be no different.
Mothers often have a deeper understanding of their child's needs, routines, and emotions, which puts them in a unique position to make important decisions about education, healthcare, and overall upbringing. You know your child best, and your instinct and knowledge will guide you in making the right choices for her future.
In your current situation, continue to advocate for your child's best interests, regardless of what others may say; their opinions don’t define your capabilities or choices this far.
Remember, you are the key to your child’s happiness and well-being. It’s not about grandparents or anyone else on Nairaland; it's about you. Surround yourself with supportive people in this time you are alone and seek professional advice if needed.
Get a solicitor. Goodluck.

It’s not a gender war Giselle.

I think people are just trying to point out what might be the reason why the ECO wasn’t convinced, hence, the refusal.

Just look at it as well from that perspective.

giselle237:
You won’t make any mistakes. Stay confident and ignore the naysayers. Even here in the UK, in the field of paediatrics, moms are recognised as the primary caregivers for their children, and your situation will be no different.
Mothers often have a deeper understanding of their child's needs, routines, and emotions, which puts them in a unique position to make important decisions about education, healthcare, and overall upbringing. You know your child best, and your instinct and knowledge will guide you in making the right choices for her future.
In your current situation, continue to advocate for your child's best interests, regardless of what others may say; their opinions don’t define your capabilities or choices this far.
Remember, you are the key to your child’s happiness and well-being. It’s not about grandparents or anyone else on Nairaland; it's about you. Surround yourself with supportive people in this time you are alone and seek professional advice if needed.
Get a solicitor. Goodluck.

AKALAMAGBO:
It’s not a gender war Giselle.
I think people are just trying to point out what might be the reason why the ECO wasn’t convinced, hence, the refusal.Just look at it as well from that perspective.

Lmao.
Instead of focusing on solutions or at least speaking neutrality/positivity, most started to defend an imaginary individual not in the picture. Almost like the bros(father) appeared on nairaland as well.
giselle237 not Giselle.

Cyberknight:
Unfortunately, that's not going to happen.
The same way that UK governments of all stripes will never curtail the welfare state or summon up the courage to match tax revenue to expenditure - there will never be an honest conversation with the public.

Schools are out and people now have time on their hands. Let's see what this summer brings.

Don't hold your breath.

https://metro.co.uk/2025/07/17/riot-police-smash-blockade-protesters-clash-migrant-hotel-23689890/?ito=tiktokarticle

Lincoln4u:
Thank you I’m reapplying i just don’t want to make same mistake but so far no lead

Advisable you do not upload your refusal letter into ChatGPT or any free online platform.

If you want to use AI to draft a cover letter, you can easily input the anonymous details of your situation into the chatbot ("I'm a mother who has sole custody and sole legal responsibility for my 9 year old child...), and it will still generate a draft for you.

Raalsalghul:
Don't hold your breath.

https://metro.co.uk/2025/07/17/riot-police-smash-blockade-protesters-clash-migrant-hotel-23689890/?ito=tiktokarticle

Waiting to exhale.

giselle237:
Speaking from a place of knowledge as I have handled some of these. If you need the father’s consent then that’s no more sole custody/responsibility and therein nullifies the court order for sole custody.
That also means father must be contacted concerning everything for the child.
In child custody stuff, sole custody means one parent gets to make all the important decisions about the kid’s life and the kid mostly lives with that parent. The other parent might still get to visit or stay in touch, but they usually can’t make big calls about things like school or healthcare.
Sole responsibility further streamlines this. Only the one parent is RESPONSIBLE for the child and makes ALL the decisions.
Sadly, your information is GROSSLY incorrect and should be disregarded. Child’s father’s consent will damage this application 1000% more. Cheers.

I’m not suggesting the decision has to be a joint one, and I’m not fully aware of how the law interprets sole custody and the associated rights.

However, the relationship between a parent and a child is a lifelong one — whether the other parent likes it or not. It is fundamentally wrong for one parent to make significant decisions that could materially hinder the other parent’s ability to maintain a meaningful relationship with the child, without involving or informing them in the process.

The key word here is inform/involve the other parent, not necessarily to seek their consent. This is the morally right thing to do, and it is also the right thing to do in the best interest of the child.

If op had done this, the visa application would likely have been successful.

One parent should never weaponise child custody rights against the other.

They are meant to protect the well-being of the child — not to serve as a tool for punishment, control, or revenge between parents.

Regardless, I wish op success in her appeal

giselle237:
Lmao.
Instead of focusing on solutions or at least speaking neutrality/positivity, most started to defend an imaginary individual not in the picture. Almost like the bros(father) appeared on nairaland as well.
giselle237 not Giselle.

I have to agree with AKALAMAGBO', I don’t know why you went nuclear on gender about this.

How will we discuss this without bringing the father into it?

And to your point about mothers knowing what is best for the children and in a better position to make decisions for their future? If that is true then the street of London and major UK cities would be a safer place. Vast majority of knife stabbing is London and other cities are carried out by kids with no biological father in their lives and they hardly finish school

Getting a provisional driving license is an easy as long as you have an address. I would suggest you apply for that.

ogify1:
Elders, as an international student who arrived in the UK in March 2025, how can I improve my credit score of 549? I’ve tried applying for credit cards with Capital One and Tesco, I was approved, but they require a UK driver’s license to verify my identity, which I don’t have yet. I’d really appreciate any advice or help.

Good evening everyone.

Please I need urgent legal advice and an immigration lawyer who can help my current situation. I had an issue with social workers for over three months now. My employer cancelled my COS because of the issue with social worker which has to do with my kids.

Today, I received a letter from Home office asking me to leave as I do not currently have a visa.

It has been challenging and difficult for me for the past 4months.

Please treat with urgency

Thank you

Mosun8220:
Good evening everyone.

Please I need urgent legal advice and an immigration lawyer who can help my current situation. I had an issue with social workers for over three months now. My employer cancelled my COS because of the issue with social worker which has to do with my kids.

Today, I received a letter from Home office asking me to leave as I do not currently have a visa.

It has been challenging and difficult for me for the past 4months.

Please treat with urgency

Thank you

Are your kids currently with you or not or are they in foster care?

Can you summarise the issue you had with your kids and what's the current status? E.g. were you taken to court, etc.

Are both parents involved in the issue with current services or is there a likelihood one parent may be seen as a protective factor?

lovelysofa:
Are your kids currently with you or not or are they in foster care?

Can you summarise the issue you had with your kids and what's the current status? E.g. were you taken to court, etc. one my kids went out to his friends place without my knowledge

Are both parents involved in the issue with current services or is there a likelihood one parent may be seen as a protective factor?

They are currently in foster care and we don’t have access to them.

One of them sneaked out of the house to his friend’s place without the knowledge of my wife . It was from his friend’s place that he told them we used to beat him with TV cable which is not true. They informed the social worker and we got arrested. Then my employer was informed and I was disengaged me and my COS was cancelled.

Currently we are in court. Both parents are involved.

Mosun8220:
They are currently in foster care and we don’t have access to them.

One of them sneaked out of the house to his friend’s place without the knowledge of my wife . It was from his friend’s place that he told them we used to beat him with TV cable which is not true. They informed the social worker and we got arrested. Then my employer was informed and I was disengaged me and my COS was cancelled.

Currently we are in court. Both parents are involved.

you go fear government, you go fear racism, you go fear your wife, you go fear your kids, all in these saner climes. Wtf is all that!

Same kid wey dem wan secure future for niyen oo...not even adopted child or maid. This life na super story jare. Wish you all the best, hope you get out of this in one piece

Mosun8220:
They are currently in foster care and we don’t have access to them.

One of them sneaked out of the house to his friend’s place without the knowledge of my wife . It was from his friend’s place that he told them we used to beat him with TV cable which is not true. They informed the social worker and we got arrested. Then my employer was informed and I was disengaged me and my COS was cancelled.

Currently we are in court. Both parents are involved.

You have two cases here unfortunately, letter from HO asking you people to leave the country and the social work case.

Firstly email the HO and explain to them that you have an ongoing case with social workers and present evidence.

Seek legal counseling regarding social workers's case as it can take very long to settle

Mosun8220:
Good evening everyone.

Please I need urgent legal advice and an immigration lawyer who can help my current situation. I had an issue with social workers for over three months now. My employer cancelled my COS because of the issue with social worker which has to do with my kids.

Today, I received a letter from Home office asking me to leave as I do not currently have a visa.

It has been challenging and difficult for me for the past 4months.

Please treat with urgency

Thank you

Send a message to NIUK on X... I listened to a space about a year ago, a gentleman spoke.... This is his area of specialization (shame I did not take his details down (so unlike me)......

Sorry to hear about your predicaments and battles on both fronts.....

Lexusgs430:
Send a message to NIUK on X... I listened to a space about a year ago, a gentleman spoke.... This is his area of specialization (shame I did not take his details down (so unlike me)......

Sorry to hear about your predicaments and battles on both fronts.....

@Mosun8220 so sorry you are going through this. If it helps, below are the contact details of the gentleman Lexus is talking about

The X Space recording: https://x.com/stwenactus/status/1860806494268117134

website: https://save-the-woman.org/contact/

Their email: info@save-the-woman.org

Hopefully, Nairaland bots won't delete the links. Wishing you all the best.

LionInZion:
@Mosun8220 so sorry you are going through this. If it helps, below are the contact details of the gentleman Lexus is talking about

The X Space recording: https://x.com/stwenactus/status/1860806494268117134

website: https://save-the-woman.org/contact/

Their email: info@save-the-woman.org

Hopefully, Nairaland bots won't delete the links. Wishing you all the best.

Perfect teamwork..... I saw the snake, you killed the snake........ 🐍😂🤣

Lexusgs430:
Perfect teamwork..... I saw the snake, you killed the snake........ 🐍😂🤣

😀😀😀

Hopefully Mosun gets sorted out. I can imagine the ordeal they're going through right now.

Mosun8220:
They are currently in foster care and we don’t have access to them.

One of them sneaked out of the house to his friend’s place without the knowledge of my wife . It was from his friend’s place that he told them we used to beat him with TV cable which is not true. They informed the social worker and we got arrested. Then my employer was informed and I was disengaged me and my COS was cancelled.

Currently we are in court. Both parents are involved.

Am so sorry for all you're going through, please stay strong ( easier said than done) and seek all manner of legal help you can get.

You see all these kids that we spend huge resources on in the name of a better life, hmmm, no wonder many are sending them back home in Nigeria or Africa to school, where oraimo cord will reset their brains for real with no government interference.