₦airaland Forum

aswani:
Very wrong, you do have to attend every single PTA meeting, you need to spend time bonding with your children.

Being a father is more than paying for school fees and upkeep of the child. Any Tom, Dick and Harry can do that.

It starts with coming home tired after your day at work but finding time to change the baby's nappy at least once.

It carries on to knowing your child's friends and teachers names and being there to support them emotionally during their teenage years despite whatever it is you are facing in your own life as a man.

Delegate very little if at all any, the child is as much yours as anyone else's.

Then it wouldn't be a bad idea to rather teach the child by yourself instead of registering him or her in a school, you'll create more bonding when you stop hustling and stay focus on raising your children.

When you send a child to school that automatically means you've delegated the education to the teachers.
I am also a responsible father, when I talked about delegating I'm not asking you to make financial obligations your only form of delegation.

If you have three children in different institutions at different locations and they all have something to do almost on the same day then I'm sure you'll split yourself into three so as to attend those programs just because you want to bond properly with your children.

aswani:
Very wrong, you do have to attend every single PTA meeting, you need to spend time bonding with your children.

Being a father is more than paying for school fees and upkeep of the child. Any Tom, Dick and Harry can do that.

It starts with coming home tired after your day at work but finding time to change the baby's nappy at least once.

It carries on to knowing your child's friends and teachers names and being there to support them emotionally during their teenage years despite whatever it is you are facing in your own life as a man.

Delegate very little if at all any, the child is as much yours as anyone else's.

Then it wouldn't be a bad idea to rather teach the child by yourself instead of registering him or her in a school, you'll create more bonding when you stop hustling and stay focus on raising your children.

When you send a child to school that automatically means you've delegated the education to the teachers.
I am also a responsible father, when I talked about delegating I'm not asking you to make financial obligations your only form of delegation.

If you have three children in different institutions at different locations and they all have something to do almost on the same day then I'm sure you'll split yourself into three so as to attend those programs just because you want to bond properly with your children.

IyaTola:
You make a valid point—many people end up with 3 or 4 kids due to poor family planning or unexpected life turns. That’s a real issue, and it's important to talk about it without shame.

However, I’d argue that the same principle applies, even when people have many children “intentionally.” Intent is not the same as strategy. Just because someone planned to have 5, 6, or more kids doesn’t mean they thought deeply about the emotional, financial, or psychological cost especially in today’s world.

A lot of people grew up with the cultural mindset that "children are wealth" or “the more the merrier,” but times have changed. Raising one well-rounded child today takes far more than it did a few decades ago—education, safety, emotional support, and global competitiveness are all high-stakes.

So while it may not be a “mistake” in the traditional sense, it’s often a result of emotional reasoning, tradition, or pressure not actual long-term strategic thinking.

Choosing to have a large family is a personal right, yes. But let’s not confuse that with foresight or strategy especially when many parents eventually admit they feel stretched thin, exhausted, or emotionally unavailable.

Leave ChatGPT alone and use your brain to air your opinion.

pocohantas:
It is clear you know nothing of what you are saying. Nigerian couples don't love plenty children? I should have this argument with you?
Better take your epistle to healthcare centers and your male groups.

It'd be nice to have this discussion within the precinct of southerners, majority of whom we know practice monogamy instead of northerners who are mostly polygamous and therefore have maaany children. For the former, I can boldly say that anyone whom you see have more than 4 children who were born in this 21st century, were as a result failed family planning. I know a close family who was a victim of this, and recently, there's this very wealthy woman I know on Facebook who said about two years ago that after the birth of her last child, she has been very concerned that her family planning could fail her one day and she takes in again. Guess what, a few weeks ago, she announced the birth of her fifth child. Her fear had materialized — would you then say she wanted plenty children??

Kobojunkie:
That is, instead, what being an incompetent father can be like.

That is also what an incompetent mother can be also, since you are just one bitter feminist.

RenaissanceGuy:
It'd be nice to have this discussion within the precinct of southerners, majority of whom we know practice monogamy instead of northerners who are mostly polygamous and therefore have maaany children. For the former, I can boldly say that anyone whom you see have more than 4 children who were born in this 21st century, were as a result failed family planning. I know a close family who was a victim of this, and recently, there's this very wealthy woman I know on Facebook who said about two years ago that after the birth of her last child, she has been very concerned that her family planning could fail her one day and she takes in again. Guess what, a few weeks ago, she announced the birth of her fifth child. Her fear had materialized — would you then say she wanted plenty children??

Yawns....

RenaissanceGuy:
It'd be nice to have this discussion within the precinct of southerners, majority of whom we know practice monogamy instead of northerners who are mostly polygamous and therefore have maaany children. For the former, I can boldly say that anyone whom you see have more than 4 children who were born in this 21st century, were as a result failed family planning. I know a close family who was a victim of this, and recently, there's this very wealthy woman I know on Facebook who said about two years ago that after the birth of her last child, she has been very concerned that her family planning could fail her one day and she takes in again. Guess what, a few weeks ago, she announced the birth of her fifth child. Her fear had materialized — would you then say she wanted plenty children??

She is likely a millenial


Any gen z woman born 5 pikin , just know na village girl she be , northeners excluded

Puss360:
Lols.... It takes a very strong couple to be determined to have just 2 kids o...
They need to look and focus on the future of the unborn child o...
Government isn't helping matters...
Everybody just dey advise everybody to keep borning(😂 pardon my grammar)..
Born two, dem go say e too small..
Born two boys, society will taunt the wife "boy na the papa get am ooo, try born girl for urself...."
Born two girls, society will taunt the man " as U dey so, you Neva born pikin o, na woman gets girl pikin o"..

All these leads to excessive offsprings...
Then we all gather and complain about the government of neglecting to Provide a better life...
It is well o

Spot on! As a mother of two toddlers, I sometimes feel inadequate when I see women having 3,4,5 kids. I do wonder if it's intentional.

And then people who see with two, will make mention of 'when you give birth to the third one...', 'na so you go do for the four wey you wan born?...', 'when you give birth to your son...(I have two girls)', etc.
Imagine a mother of two feeling insecure. What about a woman without child?

These are some of the insecurities families face. These tend to foster overpopulation wit the hope that God will provide or "we go survive", only to give the children mediocre training.

God help us.

Idaytesj29:
Women has arrays of options in FP than men. Only of recent I hear of a research breakthrough of pills for men taken once a year, only option available had always been through surgery called vasectomy ( not sure I got the spelling)

If the pills becomes available soon, trust me. Men will have no problem using it.

You deliberately ignored mentioning the most common and CHEAPEST option for men which is condoms, why is that?


Don’t worry, I already know what you are. You believe family planning is beneath you and solely on the woman.

President.

phorget:
Then it wouldn't be a bad idea to rather teach the child by yourself instead of registering him or her in a school, you'll create more bonding when you stop hustling and stay focus on raising your children.

When you send a child to school that automatically means you've delegated the education to the teachers.
I am also a responsible father, when I talked about delegating I'm not asking you to make financial obligations your only form of delegation.

If you have three children in different institutions at different locations and they all have something to do almost on the same day then I'm sure you'll split yourself into three so as to attend those programs just because you want to bond properly with your children.

In my opinion, you are wrong. You don't delegate the education of your children to your teachers and walk away. You must always know where your kids are on the scale and how to improve them

Your fatherly job doesn't end at sending them to school, you must manage it too by reading all school reports.

If you have three children events, be at one and when you get home, ask about the other plus you should ensure you know whose you missed so as to prioritise them when next there is a clash.

Each to their own anyway.

fxexperts:
That is also what an incompetent mother can be also, since you are just one bitter feminist.

Well, sell your take instead to the one my response was directed.🙄🙄🙄🙄

1Sharon:
You deliberately ignored mentioning the most common and CHEAPEST option for men which is condoms, why is that?


Don’t worry, I already know what you are. You believe family planning is beneath you and solely on the woman.

President.

You want married men to use condom for their legally married wives? Are you real?

The stories of married women and men jumping around claiming they are not satisfied by their partners didn't ring a bell right?

May be you are young and single, may be you are not suppose to be having this conversation.

Make husband and wife dey use condom? Lol 😂😆😂. Frustration loading for them.

pocohantas:
Sir, please go get snipped if you don't want more kids. I won't go through pregnancy, go through labour and still have to deal with FP. I told mine this and we knew from the onset he would take one for the team. Men will have a problem using it because men do not like things that invade their manhoòd in such a way. Researches that led to FP for women were done by men. If men wanted to be the bearers of FP, they would have done it for themselves. They never wanted that burden.

Your choice. I have no problem with that. Being married is not by force. You can be single, be a single mother and still be happy.
You are not doing a man a favour by being married to him, everyone play their roles. Marriage is not for everyone after all.

Idaytesj29:
Your choice. I have no problem with that. Being married is not by force. You can be single, be a single mother and still be happy.
You are not doing a man a favour by being married to him, everyone play their roles. Marriage is not for everyone after all.

No correlation between your response and my post to you. Why getting emotional?

Lol @ everyone plays their role.
Why then were you pretending to be waiting for an imaginary FP pill for men? You thought you could fool me? All the extra story concerns you and your wife _if any.

1Sharon:
You deliberately ignored mentioning the most common and CHEAPEST option for men which is condoms, why is that?


Don’t worry, I already know what you are. You believe family planning is beneath you and solely on the woman.

President.

Lol! I saw through his first post.
It took a little to make him unravel. 😂😂

Hhh4444:
15years too far. This current tinubulation is already advising people.

Dem no dey tell person. This one wey AI don dey rapidly cancel peoples jobs in the West (a trend that will affect Nigeria too especially Tech and Back office jobs) e go reach when the mans body itself will advice itself not to produce as much sperm since he has no way to cater for any new children financially.

I decided to put my above theory to test and asked ChatGPT to verify its truth and below is what I got back from ChatGPT :-

You said :- can stress kill a mans sperm or reduce his sperm count

ChatGPT said:

Yes, stress can reduce a man's sperm count and negatively affect sperm quality—but it typically doesn't "kill" sperm outright. Here's how it works:

1. Hormonal Disruption

Chronic stress affects the hypothalamic-pituitary-gonadal (HPG) axis, which regulates reproductive hormones like:

Testosterone – essential for sperm production.

Luteinizing hormone (LH) and follicle-stimulating hormone (FSH) – both play a direct role in stimulating the testes to produce sperm.

When you're stressed, your body increases cortisol (the stress hormone), which can interfere with this hormonal balance and lower testosterone levels, ultimately reducing sperm production.

2. Oxidative Stress

Stress increases oxidative stress in the body, which can:

Damage sperm DNA.

Reduce sperm motility (movement).

Alter sperm shape (morphology).

3. Lifestyle Factors Associated with Stress

Men under stress may:

Sleep poorly.

Eat unhealthy foods.

Smoke or drink more.

Avoid exercise.

All of these can contribute to lower sperm count and poorer sperm quality.

4. Psychological Stress & Fertility

Several studies have found that:

Men under high levels of psychological stress often have lower semen volume, sperm count, and sperm motility.

Stress related to trying to conceive (especially during fertility treatment) can worsen these effects.

Can Stress Make a Man Infertile?

Not usually by itself—but it can be a contributing factor, especially if combined with:

Poor diet

Obesity

Substance use

Medical conditions (like varicocele or infections)

What Can Help?

Regular exercise

Stress management techniques (like meditation, therapy, journaling)

Good sleep hygiene

Balanced diet

Avoiding smoking, alcohol, and drugs

JOACHINpedro:
I won't pity any couple that gives birth to 3+ children without a complementary source of livelihood for them.

I have been preaching against bringing innocent humans to this world to suffer and some persons are saying "ọbụ chukwu na azụ ụmụ" with active joysticks and vaginas.

Unfortunately your preaching against having many children is not enough.

You need to preach for better governance that keeps everyone too busy to be fcvking around making babies. This means you advocate for your commonwealth to be used for employing well paid civil servants who will make basic services and utilities available for everyone.

This will create the environment for private businesses to thrive and employ even more workers.

anonimi:
Neo-black Problem: Must Blacks Be Ruled by Whites in Order to Prosper?

In short, the neo-black dilemma may be framed as follows: is it better to live under white rule without political dignity but with basic life-sustaining standards for many;

or to live under black rule with illusory political dignity and without basic life- sustaining standards for the majority?
@
@
The path forward for Africa lies in cultivating higher and adequate levels of personal and communal agential integrity as well as full personal responsibility and productivity. Not to mention creativity (including epistemic creativity), productive justice (such as merit and freedom), harmony and reconciliation at local and international levels, and a proper domestication of capitalism and other related values and institutions.

Africa must stop wasting her time on dreams of socialism because it is a system of wealth distribution primarily. Whereas, capitalism is a system of wealth creation primarily, and wealth has to be produced before it can be distributed.

https://www.thisdaylive.com/index.php/2024/10/12/neo-black-problem-must-blacks-be-ruled-by-whites-in-order-to-prosper/

Kobojunkie:
So, how come when the woman is the breadwinner, she is not regarded as the head of the family? Take the case of Osinbajo as an example, the woman was the breadwinner, yet her husband, children, and family did not see her as the head of the family.

Do you want to read my statement again?

Anybody who wants to give orders in a house must be ready to contribute financially to the house. I did not specify any sex.

You have 2 kids, you borrow to feed them and you want to have a 3rd child. A vasectomy ll be a better use of that man's time imho

Idaytesj29:
You want married men to use condom for their legally married wives? Are you real?

The stories of married women and men jumping around claiming they are not satisfied by their partners didn't ring a bell right?

May be you are young and single, may be you are not suppose to be having this conversation.

Make husband and wife dey use condom? Lol 😂😆😂. Frustration loading for them.

What’s the issue? Do you think condoms are beneath you?


Condoms cost nothing and don’t put your health at risk like female contraceptives do, but you’re just selfish.

1Sharon:
What’s the issue? Do you think condoms are beneath you?


Condoms cost nothing and don’t put your health at risk like female contraceptives do, but you’re just selfish.

You think it's about the cost medically, financially or otherwise alone? No.

Imagine you married to your man of your dreams, fully celebrated and acknowledged wedding. Every time you are to enjoy each other's conjugal comforts, he stands before you to wrap on a condom. Imagine that every time, except when you guys plan to get pregnant like once in 3 years and when you are done having kids, he wears condom for you forever, every time ceaselessly. How would you feel?


In short, when you get married, 2 to 3 years into your marriage, we can have this conversation. This topic is beyond you at the moment.

Puss360:
No amount is much or small, it all depends on Ur financial capability...
Majority of the population earns less than 100k monthly, so it's safe to say one or 2 kids are okay..

God is Ur strength sha...
4 kids lol... U dey try o..

For this period wey ordinary primary school fees dey reach 70k

I was lucky enough to have raised capital aggressively
enough in my early 30s.

Since Jan to date,it was only last month I was able to spend less.

The cheapest I have spent this year happened to be in the month of July,that is about 1.2m. Other months were terribly high.

I don't expect anyone to believe me but I know, it is never easy with me.

Na God hand I dey.

emmaodet:
Don't mind them. Useless people.
I have so many around me.
I have muted them from constantly seeing my whatsapp status.
They are always begging with so many sob stories.
They see you go on a staycation or vacation and they get annoyed for not picking their slacks.
There is this mentality of "are you blind to see are the problems on ground in the family to pick one rather than going on vacation"
Can't you use the money to pick or lift other family members? We rise by lifting other people ganags