₦airaland Forum

The Difference Between Dowry and Bride Price and Bride and Wife

There is a huge difference between a dowry and a bride price. But in this part of the world (Sub-Saharan Africa), we use them interchangeably. But they are not interchangeable.

A dowry is the money and property given to a female child on her wedding day, by her parents, to take to her husband's home to become the joint property of both her and her husband.

It is practised in Europe, Asia, and the Middle East.

This is in line with the Biblical injunction that a wife is a helper to her husband, not a burden-Genesis 2:18.

A bride price, however, is different. In African culture, and Jewish traditions and law, it is the property or money demanded by a bride's family to give her away in marriage to her intended husband, on the grounds that she is a virgin. Please see Exodus 22:17, and the aso asa Ibale custom of the Lukumi Yoruba.

Exodus 22:17 says:

If her father absolutely refuses to give her to him, he must still pay the bride-price for virgins.

And according to the Lukumi Yoruba, if the bride's virginity is not proven by the aso funfun (white cloth on which the marriage is consummated on the bridal night), being stained, the marriage is not valid and the bride price will be returned.

The exorbitant demand for property and money by some Sub-Saharan African ethnicities, who I will not identify, for a woman who is not a virgin is not legally and technically a bride price. It is extortion!

If you read Scripture, the term 'bride' is never used for a woman who is not a virgin.

For example, Isaiah 62:5 is very clear on the matter. That verse says:

"For as a young man marries a virgin, so your sons shall marry you; and as the bridegroom rejoices over the bride, so your God will rejoice over you."

Also, Jeremiah 2:32 says:

"Can a virgin forget her ornaments, or a bride her attire?"

These verses prove that bridehood is synonymous with virginity.

Song of Solomon 4:12 is even more explicit. That verse says:

"A locked up garden is my sister, my bride; a locked up spring, a sealed fountain."

As a man, by African tradition and Scriptural law, you can marry a woman who is not a virgin. But such a woman is not a bride. And you should not pay any bride price for her.

For example, you will notice that David paid a bride price for King Saul's daughter in 1 Samuel 18:20-27. However, he did not pay a bride price for Abigail-1 Samuel 25:40-42.

If we in Africa do not return to these traditions and continue the moral decadence in our society, where sex and sensuality are not curtailed, we will continue to be the dregs of the world, with high rates of sexually transmitted diseases.

Finally, a White wedding is not our culture in Africa, and it is not a Christian wedding. It is purely a European traditional wedding.

If we must adopt that culture, we must appropriate it accurately.

In Europe, from where we got the practice, it is NOT the man or his family that pays for a White wedding. Customarily, it is the bride's father who foots the bill.,

Industrial Money Obtainers, I hope you have heard?

Reno Omokri

Gospeller. Deep Thinker. #TableShaker. Ruffler of the Feathers of Obidents. #1 Bestselling author of Facts Versus Fiction: The True Story of the Jonathan Years. Hodophile. Hollywood Magazine Humanitarian of the Year, 2019. Business Insider Influencer of the Year 2022. 21st Most Talked About Person in Africa, 2024.

It amounts to punishment if a woman allows a man who is not her husband to sleep with her and take her virginity for free, only for her parents to demand a bride price from the man who wants to marry her. Think about it. What are you paying for? The woman is not a property that you are buying. No. If not, it would have been called 'Woman price'. What you are paying for is a bride. And for you to be a bride, you must be chaste.

Many people do not realise that if a man has intercourse with a woman, he has automatically married her. You doubt me? Okay, read the following verse of Scripture:

"Then Isaac brought her into the tent of Sarah his mother and took Rebekah, and she became his wife."-Genesis 24:67.

Isaac and Rebekah did not have a wedding ceremony. The act of marriage occurred when Isaac brought Rebekah into his mother's tent and "took" her.

What do you think took her means?

I don't care who insults me. God put me on Earth to live up to His expectations, not yours.

Let me warn our people that we have a problem as Black people. Please fact-check me: Black people are the only race who have communities where more babies are aborted than are born.

If virginity was not important, why did God choose Mary? It was for one reason only. Her virginity. As a society, we must reward virginity, rather than promiscuity. More than half of Black Africa's challenges, from high HIV/AIDS rate to overpopulation, will be solved if we returned to our traditional values of restricting sexual intercourse ONLY to married couples.

Chilipepper:
https://www.facebook.com/share/p/19g626jYVb/

https://www.facebook.com/share/p/1GTRHnp9ni/

swaggerjack:
Reno Omokri: I Challenge Tinubu To Prove If He Was Not A Drug Lord In Chicago



https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7DLrnL6rQ6M?si=uMMUVFfetODTr4Fw

Merry100:
In Scripture, women were treated with dignity; Jesus Himself uplifted and respected women regardless of their past. There isn't a single verse in the Bible where God rewarded a woman simply for being a virgin.

Mary being chosen wasn't a reward for her virginity; it was to fulfill prophecy, align with the lineage of David, and emphasize a miraculous birth.

If your logic held, Mary Magdalene wouldn't have been the first to witness the risen Christ. Virginity has never been presented as a qualification to be valued, blessed, or favoured by God.

greatiyk4u:
I concur completely

Thank God I married a virgin and paid her bride price appropriately as required and recommended
Though the virginity was taken by me before the Bride price was paid.....

muyico:
This man again?? Ur daughter virgin? Your wife married virgin?