₦airaland Forum

SeriouslySense:
She seems simple, and i found nothing wrong with her comments. She definitely has potential to be a good wife.

Who does not like peace, if she really brings peace, she is the one, She said she will bring Joy and peace.

What does joy, peace and good wife mean to you?

I mean what does that look like in practice everyday?

shaybebaby:
No cogent response. Got it!

I'll leave you to reflect on my initial question. Maybe at some point, you will recognise the exercise in futility.

I think you guys, in your bid to sound western you forget that you are in Africa dealing with Africans...


If I should ask you to name one person you know that her lifestyle supports your claim now, you will vanish... Instead of being practical and real with yourself, you deceive yourself with what you read and see... As rich as Regina is, despite the fact that Ned has the capabilities to make her a full housewife(which she is anyways), yet she still have what's going on for her personally...

I challenge you to give me one female with a lifestyle that supports your claim...

PDJT:
[sub][/sub]

- The passion and emotion that you deploy in attacking men and masculinity on display here is really funny. Men must have shown you pepper🌶. I'm sorry, love, it's a man's world and you must get used to it.

Indeed, it is a man's world. Like the nigeria which has rendered the average man unable to keep a family such that they are now demanding women bring money to the table.
Well done.

Unrated900:
My guy you can't changed woman's orientation.
What they gonna do is what they gonna do nothing more




quote author=Clairvoyancy post=136622517]From the screenshot, it shows this one is still naive and innocent (not vouching for her tho)... It's understandable if she begs for money, cos she's a student, not all students have legit side hustles...

This girl have potential of becoming a good wife, girls like this can turn 100k capital to 300k in short period.. forget the fact that she said she has nothing else to offer, her honesty alone is an asset, she just needs someone to guide her...

For me, for the fact that she begs from family and friends alone, I can risk it all and marry her and then change her orientation.... Her peers probably have side hustle (olosho), begs from their sugar daddies, or date multiple men to earn a living an live large in school.... For me oo, I still fit risk this kain girl if all is in that SS is true...

Speak for yourself bro

irumole1975:
We know but what if u bring some brain sometimes?

To be submissive requires brain to be on airplane mode. So pick a lane.

Clairvoyancy:
From the screenshot, it shows this one is still naive and innocent (not vouching for her tho)... It's understandable if she begs for money, cos she's a student, not all students have legit side hustles...

This girl have potential of becoming a good wife, girls like this can turn 100k capital to 300k in short period.. forget the fact that she said she has nothing else to offer, her honesty alone is an asset, she just needs someone to guide her...

For me, for the fact that she begs from family and friends alone, I can risk it all and marry her and then change her orientation.... Her peers probably have side hustle (olosho), begs from their sugar daddies, or date multiple men to earn a living an live large in school.... For me oo, I still fit risk this kain girl if all is in that SS is true...

What a very sensible and mature comment....May the Lord continue to bless you with more wisdom... Relationship and marriage requires understanding especially from we men,when we do the women will follow suit.

shaybebaby:
Indeed, it is a man's world. Like the nigeria which has rendered the average man unable to keep a family such that they are now demanding women bring money to the table.
Well done.

- Since the bird has learn to fly without perching, the hunter has also learn to shoot without missing.

jaxxy:
Prove me wrong. Any of us can be wrong based of the information she gave. We don't know her personally to tell anything.

We are both working on hypothesis and possibilities nothing confirmed.

I already did that in my previous comment, she she has no reason to be in-between lies and truth.... For what aim exactly?

Clairvoyancy:
I think you guys, in your bid to sound western you forget that you are in Africa dealing with Africans...


If I should ask you to name one person you know that her lifestyle supports your claim now, you will vanish... Instead of being practical and real with yourself, you deceive yourself with what you read and see... As rich as Regina is, despite the fact that Ned has the capabilities to make her a full housewife(which she is anyways), yet she still have what's going on for her personally...

I challenge you to give me one female with a lifestyle that supports your claim...

What lifestyle is that? And you still haven't answered my question.

Nonexisting1:
I don't know why you are complaining. If I see a Nigerian girl that will give me all she promised you, I will marry her. She said she will bring you joy and peace, give you children, be a good wife, do her rites and obligations as wife. What else do you want a woman to offer you? Men are providers so don't expect a woman to give you money but if she does, it is okay too. Brother, if she can do all that she said, then I don't see the need for your complaint.

Very well said. A woman that can manage the home front and let you drink your beer in peace is wife material.
Men need to stop asking women to bring more than this to the table.

shaybebaby:
What does joy, peace and good wife mean to you?

I mean what does that look like in practice everyday?

Look at wolves for that answer
A male wolf will never cheat
He knows all his pups are his
He does his duty to his family without question and doesn't need to ask what his mate brings to the relationship
When hes too old to hunt his adult pups will hunt for him
His pack would fight and die for him
When his mate dies the majority of the time he will grieve for 6 months to 1 year and the majority of the time follow her

Sometimes the animal kingdom is more human than humans are

What that wolf has is peace

shaybebaby:
What lifestyle is that? And you still haven't answered my question.

Then it means you don't even know what your arguments are.... You just arguing blindly....


And as for your question, I already gave you your answer... You don't need to be the lady's mouthpiece.... Moreover, I stated it clearly, "if she's willing", which means, I already saw what I wanted in her, but I believe she can do more, and it's not a must, which is why I said that.... So, I don't think your question should be necessary honestly...

At least she will give you peace.

It's hard to have peace as married man.

You have a wife offering peace is enough.
You can get more from her if she is peaceful.

Clairvoyancy:
From the screenshot, it shows this one is still naive and innocent (not vouching for her tho)... It's understandable if she begs for money, cos she's a student, not all students have legit side hustles...

This girl have potential of becoming a good wife, girls like this can turn 100k capital to 300k in short period.. forget the fact that she said she has nothing else to offer, her honesty alone is an asset, she just needs someone to guide her...

For me, for the fact that she begs from family and friends alone, I can risk it all and marry her and then change her orientation.... Her peers probably have side hustle (olosho), begs from their sugar daddies, or date multiple men to earn a living an live large in school.... For me oo, I still fit risk this kain girl if all is in that SS is true...

Seriously, Guys of this generation are easily FOOLED!
You think any Undergraduate Lady is stewpid enough to disclose to a 'potential life-saver' that she has Sugar Daddies or do Hook-Up?
I laugh in Donald Trump
Will saying such things to 'a new Catch', enhance her standing with such new catch?
These Girl is super-smart and like most ladies, Super-cunning!

Men like you are the ones who always come back and start crying: An the Girl looked innocent before l married her, l dont know which Devil entered her immediately we got married.
Sorry, No Devil entered her, she was just smart enough to go "stealth" on you, before marriage.
Now that she got what she wants (marriage), there is no need for stealth anymore.

The greatest Weapon of any Woman, is to pretend that they are "Helpless"....... Most Men will generally rush to "Assist" such Women.
Naah, l dont fall for that trick any longer.

Fenrir:
Lady dont take your feminist attitude out on me, im not Nigerian and dont have that mindset

I refused to submit to Nigerian traditions to marry a woman, I believe in equality and human rights

And have fought for my beliefs, actually taking bullets in my stomach in war zones for it so people have the right to live however they want

Seems I touched nerve by attempting to engage in non-biased discourse and clarifying that the words submit and submission are the same in every context, including marriage.

However no where did I give my personal to you in our discourse. That said, I am aligned with your belief in equality and human rights for all creed and colour, man, woman, child.

Shall I call you feminist by the same token?

Side note: thank you for your service to and on behalf of humanity.

Clairvoyancy:
From the screenshot, it shows this one is still naive and innocent (not vouching for her tho)... It's understandable if she begs for money, cos she's a student, not all students have legit side hustles...

This girl have potential of becoming a good wife, girls like this can turn 100k capital to 300k in short period.. forget the fact that she said she has nothing else to offer, her honesty alone is an asset, she just needs someone to guide her...

For me, for the fact that she begs from family and friends alone, I can risk it all and marry her and then change her orientation.... Her peers probably have side hustle (olosho), begs from their sugar daddies, or date multiple men to earn a living an live large in school.... For me oo, I still fit risk this kain girl if all is in that SS is true...

You see the downfall of men is man ! Can you see how you turn an idiot into a genius with your seemingly more idiotic views?!! A student who cannot think of her future intelligently !!

This is absolute rubbish! Students must have a positive view and plan for their future and also what they intend to achieve with the education they are receiving! In her case there's no impact whatsoever she's in school and you are embellishing that dumb replies

As an absolutely independent, resourceful and stable man, the only things I really need from a wife are those things she mentioned - Be my peace, give me joy and give me children. Anything else a woman brings to my life is just a bonus.

Clairvoyancy:
Then it means you don't even know what your arguments are.... You just arguing blindly....


And as for your question, I already gave you your answer... You don't need to be the lady's mouthpiece.... Moreover, I stated it clearly, "if she's willing", which means, I already saw what I wanted in her, but I believe she can do more, and it's not a must, which is why I said that.... So, I don't think your question should be necessary honestly...

Hey bob, you're the one thats proven you are so arrogant and narcissistic you think other people should change what they want in life to suit your needs and wants instead of getting off your backside and looking for that female husband of your dreams, its not hard to find someone who's goals align with yours in Nigeria, heck its not hard in Africa in general and you dont need flash cash to do it, just be better a better man than everyone else around

Why do you think men like me travel to Africa and Asia to find love and marriage? Because most women in Europe and America now have the same "best of both" attitude as you do bob

Clairvoyancy:
I already did that in my previous comment, she she has no reason to be in-between lies and truth.... For what aim exactly?

Lol u talk like u know her or u can read her mind and intentions. U should learn to read not just in-between the lines but know the broader meaning of what people say and perhaps dont say or they will sell u in the market without ur knowledge.

shaybebaby:
Seems I touched nerve by attempting to engage in non-biased discourse and clarifying that the words submit and submission are the same in every context, including marriage.

However no where did I give my personal to you in our discourse. That said, I am aligned with your belief in equality and human rights for all creed and colour, man, woman, child.

Shall I call you feminist by the same token?

Side note: thank you for your service to and on behalf of humanity.

No, lady in Nigeria and Africa submit and submissive mean the same thing in marriage but to most of the world a man only gets a submissive housewife if.....

1) they both want it
And
2) the man is capable of sustaining the housewife lifestyle

Its extremely rare now in Europen countries and America and Australia for a man to get a housewife

Most women just dont want it
They want the best of both

They want to be independent women AND have a fully traditional man in the sense of the male roles or providing and protecting

They want to be married and live a single life at the same time, like Nigerian men want to be married and single at the same time

Clairvoyancy:
Then it means you don't even know what your arguments are.... You just arguing blindly....


And as for your question, I already gave you your answer... You don't need to be the lady's mouthpiece.... Moreover, I stated it clearly, "if she's willing", which means, I already saw what I wanted in her, but I believe she can do more, and it's not a must, which is why I said that.... So, I don't think your question should be necessary honestly...

Finally! So what i think you are saying is that whilst you would like her to fulfil her full potential as a human being, ultimately her choice to be a homemaker more than suffices at the minimum and therefore would not be a deal breaker should she fail to rise to the lofty heights you envision for her.

Am I right? If yes, then we were aligned from the get go. It is okay to want more for the people we care about. But we cannot want it more than they do, they have to want the same and be willing to do the work.

The only question remaining for us is this: "what if they never attain the heights we dream for them, are we happy to yoke ourselves to the version they are NOW, for eternity?"

If the answer is yes, we proceed. If the answer is not, we keep it moving.

And it seems your answer to the question is YES.

Fenrir:
Hey bob, you're the one thats proven you are so arrogant and narcissistic you think other people should change what they want in life to suit your needs and wants instead of getting off your backside and looking for that female husband of your dreams, its not hard to find someone who's goals align with yours in Nigeria, heck its not hard in Africa in general and you dont need flash cash to do it, just be better a better man than everyone else around

Why do you think men like me travel to Africa and Asia to find love and marriage? Because most women in Europe and America now have the same "best of both" attitude as you do bob

Bro, I'm done with you since.... You have issues with comprehension.... Go fix that first... Be safe 👍

Clairvoyancy:
Bro, I'm done with you since.... You have issues with comprehension.... Go fix that first... Be safe 👍

Nope, no problem
Go for a woman that actually wants the same as you and leave any woman that doesn't alone

If a woman only wants to be a full time mother and wife then let her find a man that wants that as well, you dont need to push people to be more than they want to be

Support = good
Pressure = bad

shaybebaby:
Am I right in thinking you want a financially independent woman?

Say you meet that sort of woman, what are you bringing to the table to make her choose you?

Of course financial security, emotional security, Protection and all, all I want from my partner is to be productive in her own way. She shouldn't be waiting till
I come home before she can buy maggi or buy data or pant for her self. I don't want such life

shaybebaby:
This! Right here.
If times require two incomes for a family to survive, then the age old "I'm the man and I demand submission" which is a relic of times past must also go away with that era.

The reality if a men now require the help of women to meet those traditional obligations, then they must also share in the rights that comes with those responsibilities.

You lack knowledge of family life even from the onset

Women are hard farmers pre colonial and post independent in the rural areas, they provide education and support for the children.

Men only provide shelter, name , protection and carryon with family legacies, the women can tap from that resources. It is western to think men are the supermen in the relationship

smallsmall:
Seriously, Guys of this generation are easily FOOLED!
You think any Undergraduate Lady is stewpid enough to disclose to a 'potential life-saver' that she has Sugar Daddies or do Hook-Up?
I laugh in Donald Trump
Will saying such things to 'a new Catch', enhance her standing with such new catch?
These Girl is super-smart and like most ladies, Super-cunning!

Men like you are the ones who always come back and start crying: An the Girl looked innocent before l married her, l dont know which Devil entered her immediately we got married.
Sorry, No Devil entered her, she was just smart enough to go "stealth" on you, before marriage.
Now that she got what she wants (marriage), there is no need for stealth anymore.

The greatest Weapon of any Woman, is to pretend that they are "Helpless"....... Most Men will generally rush to "Assist" such Women.
Naah, l dont fall for that trick any longer.

You are not even smart.... Go back and read the SS again

Vulcan24:
You lack knowledge of family life even from the onset

Women are hard farmers pre colonial and post independent in the rural areas, they provide education and support for the children.

Men only provide shelter, name , protection and carryon with family legacies, the women can tap from that resources. It is western to think men are the supermen in the relationship

No, we dont fella
The average one of us is completely satisfied with a happy, healthy and safe family

When you say western you are thinking American and British but you not thinking about Northern European or eastern European

Vulcan24:
You see the downfall of men is man ! Can you see how you turn an idiot into a genius with your seemingly more idiotic views?!! A student who cannot think of her future intelligently !!

This is absolute rubbish! Students must have a positive view and plan for their future and also what they intend to achieve with the education they are receiving! In her case there's no impact whatsoever she's in school and you are embellishing that dumb replies

Maybe her response sounds dumb, yes, but this your comment shows you are more dumber..... The question in that SS say what will she bring to the man's life.... Look at the jargons you typed

Fenrir:
No, lady in Nigeria and Africa submit and submissive mean the same thing in marriage but to most of the world a man only gets a submissive housewife if.....

1) they both want it
And
2) the man is capable of sustaining the housewife lifestyle

Its extremely rare now in Europen countries and America and Australia for a man to get a housewife

Most women just dont want it
They want the best of both

They want to be independent women AND have a fully traditional man in the sense of the male roles or providing and protecting

They want to be married and live a single life at the same time, like Nigerian men want to be married and single at the same time

I see no lies being told.

The operative word and key difference between the west and africa is choice.

West: both people agree and must agree because otherwise we have issues of coercive control, financial abuse, loss of personal freedoms etc..which we know are unlawful with legal protections in place to mitigate against negative/ exploitative outcomes which are rife in places like Africa.

Would you be kind enough to explain the single life of an independent woman whilst married?

I happen to have friends who are SAHM wives whilst their men provide financially for the entire family. An issue of childcare really,as it is expensive and therefore the decision was made for purely economic reasons. Why outsource when the cost is roughly equivalent to the wife's entire income?

So wife stays at home, kids get one hands on parent at all times, but the man recognises that she is an adult and therefore needs a break, adult time and mental stimulation with her peers so she gets to have time with her girls every now and then without the pressures of kids and familial responsibilities. Girls weekend, night at the pub. And so does the guy, golfing trips, concerts with the boys.
But also they have family trips, holidays with the kids and lastly, they have just the 2 of us time ( no kids in tow) when they can arrange childcare.

So is this different to your observations?

Vulcan24:
You see the downfall of men is man ! Can you see how you turn an idiot into a genius with your seemingly more idiotic views?!! A student who cannot think of her future intelligently !!

This is absolute rubbish! Students must have a positive view and plan for their future and also what they intend to achieve with the education they are receiving! In her case there's no impact whatsoever she's in school and you are embellishing that dumb replies

That is definition of student
Getting a better education for a better potential future

Did anyone even bother to ask what she is studying?
Maybe be its childcare to hypothetically be a better mother in the future

Why would she just sit on her backside while waiting for husband she wants, when she could possibly be learning the skills needed to potentially be the mother she might just want to be

horlahwaley:
Of course financial security, emotional security, Protection and all, all I want from my partner is to be productive in her own way. She shouldn't be waiting till
I come home before she can buy maggi or buy data or pant for her self. I don't want such life

To take the initiative as and when required. Ergo many hands make light work.
I don't see any issues with this. Both parties working in their personal capacity for the good of the entire family.

I particularly like the bolded.