₦airaland Forum

I don't even argue; I just pay and even apologize for forgetting because I know the total package (the woman herself and all she symbolises) is not cheap. I'm ready to pay for anything that involves them because I could choose to be single, but I didn't!

Rexymania:
✓ After stocking the house with food? Any money given to you could be optional

Why then does the husband go off to spend money on things for himself after stocking the house? Why does he spend any money on transportation, self-care, eating & drinking out... If after stocking the house, all other things ought to be optional?

EmperorIsaac:
➜I don't even argue; I just pay and even apologize for forgetting because I know the total package (the woman herself and all she symbolises) is not cheap. I'm ready to pay for anything that involves them because I could choose to be single, but I didn't!

People like OP believe a wife is free labor he is entitled to, probably because he is one of those who paid a measly amount as bride price so obtain her services.

Kobojunkie:
People like OP believe a wife is free labor he is entitled to, probably because he is one of those who paid a measly amount as bride price so obtain her services.

I was as ignorant as he was until I took a PhD seminar class and read the article: "Sexual Economics: Sex as a Female Resource for Social Exchange in Heterosexual Interactions. Personality and Social Psychology Review 4:339-363" by Baumeister, Roy F., and Kathleen D. Vows. 2004." It was after then the dynamics between the male and female sexual orientation became clear.

Kobojunkie:
Why then does the husband go off to spend money on things for himself after stocking the house? Why does he spend any money on transportation, self-care, eating & drinking out... If after stocking the house, all other things ought to be optional?

Go and tell dangote how to spend his money.

Rexymania:
➜ Go and tell dangote how to spend his money.

This response of yours is highly unreasonable!😏

Kobojunkie:
This response of yours is highly unreasonable!😏

🤷🤷🤷🤷🤷
Pèlé Mrs reason

Gbadugbakun:
So if I'm owing you 4k and I give you 100k you'll still expect me to pay you the 4k am owing you ba. Very well I will collect back my 100k and give you your 4k.

its simple just tell to withdraw 96k and 4 k for d money u owe her....
im in an opinion that debt be paid....
a friend owin me 85k gave me 5k and asked him if i should debit it from his debt he said no i dash u.

Gbadugbakun:
So you're now the victim on top of my money. Wonderful.

😂

You dey dash your helper money...ok

Gbadugbakun:
So if I'm owing you 4k and I give you 100k you'll still expect me to pay you the 4k am owing you ba. Very well I will collect back my 100k and give you your 4k.

Tell her take 95k for Ur upkeep then 5k to settle your 4k debt. You have to state it clearly. A debt is a debt and must be repaid

She can simply deduct the 4k from the 100k which is her pocket money period.

Since your woman don tell you the level her brain dey next time you go say 90 for upkeep 4 for loan and keep the change mumu go happy.

What is the problem.

Gbadugbakun:
So if I'm owing you 4k and I give you 100k you'll still expect me to pay you the 4k am owing you ba. Very well I will collect back my 100k and give you your 4k.

Money wey you give your woman put name.

Caaz:
That's why you re not my spouse, only odiegwu husbands act like you.you ve no idea the joys that comes with collecting the 4k.

You are legally right jor. Debt na debt, dash na dash. He should have made it clear. Oh, sweetie withraw #100,000 for your upkeep but please deduct the #4k I'm owning you so that I won't start the new month on a red note you hear and the wife will giggle. Easy peasy.

israelmao:
She can simply deduct the 4k from the 100k which is her pocket money period.

You have to be explicit when paying off a debt is your intention.

This is why financial literacy courses should be made mandatory for people intending to date or marry.

Marriage no be magic stick wey dey make all rules bend your way..🥱

Caaz:
Every monetary marital debt has to be paid,nature itself is in support.
So blame the deptor,not the collector.

Is that what you tell yourself as an understanding wife?


"As an understanding wife,i dont argue with my husband,sometimes he gives me #500 to prepare food,i kneel down and collect the money.i'd make sure there is food when he arrives"

https://www.nairaland.com/8507156/meals-been-cooking-1500-understanding#136600096

I will give her the 4k. Personally, my body detests insults.
It’s a bad idea to mix obligations with generosity. The debt is an obligation while the gift is generosity.
If you want to avoid problems, it would be a good idea to communicate clearly how you want to spread the money .
Something like , “ honey, here is 100k, take that 4k I owed you and then keep the charge.”
However , make sure there are no precedents, for instance if you have been giving 100k every month, then , don’t expect she will be happy if you play a fast one this time. It’s 104k you have to give her.

favour32:
Money wey you give your woman put name.

You give her as if you don't owe her an allowance?

Gbadugbakun:
So if I'm owing you 4k and I give you 100k you'll still expect me to pay you the 4k am owing you ba. Very well I will collect back my 100k and give you your 4k.

My dear, pay the 4k separately o!

It's better to pay the 4k and give her 90k for upkeep.
Na so women dey o!!

Gbadugbakun:
I saw this and decided to share it here. Why are our women like this.

Guys what would you do in this situation if you are the one?

lf you understand women mindset u won't be asking this question. They are programe differently from men. lf you like give them milliions that debt(no mata how small ) must be paid. The man shud v paid that 4k debt first then give her whatever pocket money he wants to give. Stop trying to rationalize whether is good or not. ls their nature. Accept it.

Kobojunkie:
You have to be explicit when paying off a debt is your intention.

This is why financial literacy courses should be made mandatory for people intending to date or marry.

Marriage no be magic stick wey dey make all rules bend your way..🥱

When it comes to her money it is hers while her hubby's is theirs not his right this not part of financial literacy or is it?

Bachelor For Life

That gender so entitled to another genders hard earned money from hard work and sweat, and society will paint it as marriage, tufiakwa for that gender.....

Ever since I saw how women use marriage to rob men off there freedom, I graduated from being a Bachelor to a Confirmed Bachelor..... If you care for the meaning go and ask google.....

israelmao:
✓ When it comes her money it is hers while her hubby's is theirs not his right this not part of financial literacy or is it?

How old are you that you would need for me to break down for you why her labor in the marriage needs to be rewarded same as yours?

I believe a financial literacy tutor should be able to also teach you these things. A wife is not a source of free labor.

Kobojunkie:
1 So, you think a husband does a wife a favor when he gives her money for her own upkeep in the relationship while he obviously takes out money for his own upkeep in the relationship as well?

2. Gifted? You think that money a husband gives his wife for her upkeep is a gift? Are you certain you are OK? So, when your parentis gave you allowance as a child, you regarded that as a gift?

3. I wouldn't want to work with an incompetent individual who does not realize that loans are meant to be repaid, not wiggled out of because because I also get paid a deserved allowance/ salary/bonus.

4. I honestly blame women who engage little minded individuals in the name of marriage. The situation is almost guaranteed to end up pathetic one for them 😩

imagine a man thinking the allowance he gives his own wife is more a gift than payment she deserves for her part in the marriage;the same man will have no problems giving himself all the allowance he desires by the way, all while considering it pay deserved for his own efforts.😩😩😩😩

You are not ok at all.

And what if its the man that is taking care of the domestic aspects ( cooking, going to the market, cleaning etc)?

Kobojunkie:
Maybe it is because you have never really considered marriage for what it really is, an agreement between two individuals...a partnership where responsibilities as well as dividends are meant to be shared.

The allowance a man gets from his monthly salary== made possible by his wife taking care of all domestic aspects of his relationship -- is not dash money; the allowance a wife gets from that same salary is also not dash money.

Gbadugbakun:
So if I'm owing you 4k and I give you 100k you'll still expect me to pay you the 4k am owing you ba. Very well I will collect back my 100k and give you your 4k.

Lols... You too dey vex..
But na normal woman character na.

As for me, all the times it happened to me, na to laff and yab her that's how the matter will end.

Me thinks men try not to take some things too serious. Why you go pay such paltry sum when you do more for ya woman? I no dey pay o, as dem even know say dem owe me more than I owe dem.

engrelvis:
✓ lf you understand women mindset u won't be asking this question. They are programe differently from men. lf you like give them milliions that debt(no mata how small ) must be paid. The man shud v paid that 4k debt first then give her whatever pocket money he wants to give. Stop trying to rationalize whether is good or not. ls their nature. Accept it.

It js not a woman programming but basic financial literacy. When you take a loan you ought to pay it back. Pretending that by paying a bonus/allowance/salary or giving a gift to your creditor that your loan ought to to forgiven is fraud.

He should have given her 96k for upkeep and refunded the 4k

That's how smart men like us act😎😎😎