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My mum died not long ago, and my dad has a hand in her demise because her marriage was a turbulent one and she died of HBP, now shortly after she died, my dad came along with one woman who is very bold and shameless, first off she already has children from another fling not marriage, and now she comes and sleeps over, infact she's not discreet about it she's bold, brazen and doesn't feel ashamed of what she's doing.

Recently she has gotten more relaxed , she used to mind her business, she comes and do her thing and leaves, now she overstays, and she's now meddling in our family affairs, trying to mom me and my siblings now, then turning our dad away from us, now my dad sponsors her and her child from another relationship but neglects us like he did our mom.

I could easily make life miserable for her but I am not interested because I'm moving out as soon as possible, but what about my siblings, she has taken over everything and now she's my father's voice.

natedensel:
➜My mum died not long ago, and my dad has a hand in her demise because her marriage was a turbulent one and she died of hbp, now shortly after she died my dad came along with one woman who is very bold and shameless, first off she already has children from another fling not marriage, and now she comes and sleeps over, infact she's not discreet about it she's bold, brazen and doesn't feel ashamed of what she's doing, recently she has gotten more relaxed , she used to mind her business, she comes and do her thing and leaves, now she overstays, and she's now meddling in our family affairs, trying to mom me and my siblings now, then turning our dad away from us, now my dad sponsors her and her child from another relationship but neglects us like he did our mom, I could easily make life miserable for her but I am not interested because I'm moving out as soon as possible, but what about my siblings, she has taken over everything and now she's my father's voice.

I am sorry, but why are you vindictively attacking the woman when the person who is destroying your family unit is not the woman but your father?

Your father chose this woman, allowed her to move herself and her children into your lives. The freedom the woman has in your life is as authorized by your father. So, what are you attacking and demeaning her for when all she does is as allowed by your very own father, whom you seem to think needs to be saved by you when in reality he is the very core of the problem you claim to have with this woman?

Kobojunkie:
I am sorry, but why are you vindictively attacking the woman when the person who is destroying your father is not the woman but your father?

Your father choose this woman, allowed her to move herself and her children into your lives. The freedom the woman has in your lives is authorized by your father. So, what are you attacking and demeaning her for when all she does is as allowed by your very own father, whom you seem to think needs to be saved by you when in reality he is the very core of the problem you claim to have with this woman?

The problem is why can't she just LovePeddler herself and leave, why is she now trying to control a family she just invaded few months ago, now she's diverting every support my siblings are supposed to get from their father for her and her child, her grown up teenage child, did you read what I wrote at all? She's now my father's voice like she speaks for him now, isn't it logical to nip this in the bud before it becomes rooted.

natedensel:
➜The problem is why can't she just LovePeddler herself and leave,
➜ why is she now trying to control a family she just invaded few months ago, now she's diverting every support my siblings are supposed to get from their father for her and her child, her grown up teenage child, did you read what I wrote at all?
➜ She's now my father's voice like she speaks for him now, isn't it logical to nip this in the bud before it becomes rooted.

1. She is not a lovepeddler, but your father's desire. The reason she is with your father is because your father desires and maybe even loves her. Your animosity towards her is misdirected because you are too afraid to confront your father for his choice in women.

You are probably one of those kids who placed their fathers on some sort of pedestal, and are having a fit because you finally see he is just a human being with a preek at the end of the day.

2. She is not controlling your family. Your father brought her in and allowed her do to you what she is doing, and if you have a problem with it, you need to grow a backbone and confront your father for this.

3. She is supposedly your father's voice because your father gave her permission — by your father's authority— to be his voice. If you don't like that, and you are truly serious about nipping this in the bud, then go confront your father. He, again, is the reason why that woman is in your life. There is no other reason.

@Op, your Dad and that woman don dey run side shown since even wen your Mum was the alive I guess so. Their relationship don dey since, now Wen your Mum nor dey the house again, she wan turn or take the position of the house wife.
Na your Dad get the fault for trying to neglect you and your siblings and turning his attention on the lady and her children which is very bad been that you and your siblings are his legitimate children.
Don't try fighting or making trouble with the woman , if you can talk to your Dad pls do or call the attention of some elderly ones in his family and report him to them, they will call him to order especially if he na the calm one wen dey listen to person.

natedensel:
My mum died not long ago, and my dad has a hand in her demise because her marriage was a turbulent one and she died of hbp, now shortly after she died my dad came along with one woman who is very bold and shameless.

She's not the problem.

Just imagine that your dad brought in two women and they became comfortable would you still blame the two women?

Now you get the picture right?

samwash:
➜@Op, your Dad and that woman don dey run side shown since even wen your Mum was the alive I guess so. Their relationship don dey since, now Wen your Mum nor dey the house again, she wan turn or take the position of the house wife.
Na your Dad get the fault for trying to neglect you and your siblings and turning his attention on the lady and her children which is very bad been that you and your siblings are his legitimate children.
Don't try fighting or making trouble with the woman , if you can talk to your Dad pls do or call the attention of some elderly ones in his family and report him to them, they will call him to order especially if he na the calm one wen dey listen to person.

What you said in bold is sort of valid. The reason I didn't consider opening that can of worms on @OP is because that opens up the possibility that OP's father might even consider the woman's kids his own flesh and blood. Yeah, they might also be @OP's father's legitimate children as well.

Kobojunkie:
1. She is not a lovepeddler, but your father's desire. The reason she is with your father is because your father desires and maybe even loves her. Your animosity towards her is misdirected because you are too afraid to confront your father for his choice in women.

You are probably one of those kids who placed their fathers on some sort of pedestal, and are having a fit because you finally see he is just a human being with a preek at the end of the day.

2. She is not controlling your family. Your father brought her in and allowed her do to you what she is doing, and if you have a problem with it, you need to grow a backbone and confront your father for this.

3. She is supposedly your father's voice because your father gave her permission — by your father's authority— to be his voice. If you don't like that, and you are truly serious about nipping this in the bud, then go confront your father. He, again, is the reason why that woman is in your life. There is no other reason.

All in a bid to sound wise, you did the contrary, first off its obvious you haven't experienced life and seen what people do to each other, especially women who go around wrecking homes, they don't stop at anything, and I for one have seen first hand what such women who're morally loose do to silent men and put them in a coma so much they control their lives and bank accounts making them loose their freewill and neglect their families, if you don't know this by now it means you might still be a child or a teenager, second, what sort of person are you to be insensitive to his plight? Do you know the pain you experience when someone spirals from nowhere and religate you to the background depriving you of your rights in your own home? And encouraging him to attack his father is what? So the man can turn up the heat and cut them off? I pray you experience this too so you can advise yourself to fight your dad.

As for op, your dad has been doing this way before your mum died, he is bringing her to the light now because he has no reason to hid her anymore, a person is what he is and you can't change it, draw your siblings closer, and take care of yourselves and forget he exists, this concubine will also have a taste of her medicine eventually, because promiscuous men are never satisfied, he will also seek another after this one and the circle will continue, so remove yourself from that situation and move on with your life, even orphans survive, you will survive.

dauntless15:
➜All in a bid to sound wise, you did the contrary, first off its obvious you haven't experienced life and seen what people do to each other, especially women who go around wrecking homes, they don't stop at anything, and I for one have seen first hand what such women who're morally loose do to silent men and put them in a coma so much they control their lives and bank accounts making them loose their freewill and neglect their families, if you don't know this by now it means you might still be a child or a teenager,
➜ second, what sort of person are you to be insensitive to his plight? Do you know the pain you experience when someone spirals from nowhere and religate you to the background depriving you of your rights in your own home? And encouraging him to attack his father is what? So the man can turn up the heat and cut them off? I pray you experience this too so you can advise yourself to fight your dad.

This one don delulu finish! 🥱🥱🥱

A woman is morally loose because she is dating your father and has children of her own? Nonsense!

2. Telling @OP to embrace the facts of his reality rather than continue chasing shadows that will lead him nowhere means I am insensitive to his plight? Nonsense! 🥱🥱🥱

Kobojunkie:
What you said in bold is sort of valid. The reason I didn't consider opening that can of worms on @OP is because that opens up the possibility that OP's father might even consider the woman's kids his own flesh and blood. Yeah, they might also be @OP's father's legitimate children as well.

I wanted to ask the Op, if the said lady is a widow, single mother or if she has been married before.
Am also thinking in your direction also.
He nor fit be ordinary hand for the man to forsake his children, even if their mum offend him

Kobojunkie:
This one don delulu finish! 🥱🥱🥱

A woman is morally loose because she is dating your father and has children of her own? Nonsense!

2. Telling @OP to embrace the facts of his reality rather than continue chasing shadows that will lead him nowhere means I am insensitive to his plight? Nonsense! 🥱🥱🥱

whatever man, there's a level of intelligence I interact with, just know this so you won't expect more replies.

samwash:
I wanted to ask the Op, if the said lady is a widow, single mother or if she has been married before.
Am also thinking in your direction also.
He nor fit be ordinary hand for the man to forsake his children, even if their mum offend him

She's not a widow, she's a woman who has a child out of wedlock, a child who's a teenager, a child my dad is now sponsoring while refusing to pay my siblings school fee and other things, as for me I never get a penny from him I'm an orphan at this point cuz he's not even there, I'm just pained for my siblings who are not able to take care of themselves yet.

Is this woman carrying all this act out by herself or is the second party your father?

Please go talk to your father man to man and stop causing noise here.

Calling the woman names wouldn’t solve shiiit.

natedensel:
➜She's not a widow, she's a woman who has a child out of wedlock, a child who's a teenager, a child my dad is now sponsoring while refusing to pay my siblings school fee and other things, as for me I never get a penny from him I'm an orphan at this point cuz he's not even there, I'm just pained for my siblings who are not able to take care of themselves yet.

With the Nigerian economy in the way that it is? Do DNA test on that child to determine if he is biologically linked to you.

Kobojunkie:
Do DNA test on that child to determine if he is biologically linked to you.

she's not, there's no way my dad has a teenage child, if she was younger it'll be plausible, I'm the first and I'm still young, if she is his child it means she had her for my dad before my dad even met my mum, for someone who came into the pic months ago, secondly her mum doesn't hide the fact that she had her for someone else, nor does she look like anyone in our family, my dad taking care of another mans illegitimate child because of kitty is not strange to you then I'm done with this talk.

Rokiat:
Is this woman carrying all this act out by herself or is the second party your father?

Please go talk to your father man to man and stop causing noise here.

Calling the woman names wouldn’t solve shiiit.

Ya it's noise to you, wonder why you deliberately decided to read noise, don't you have better things to do?

natedensel:
➜she's not, there's no way my dad has a teenage child, if she was younger it'll be plausible, I'm the first and I'm still young, if she is his child it means she had her for my dad before my dad even met my mum, for someone who came into the pic months ago,
➜ secondly her mum doesn't hide the fact that she had her for someone else, nor does she look like anyone in our family, my dad taking care of another mans illegitimate child because of kitty is not strange to you then I'm done with this talk.

WOW... you clearly don't know much about the world outside of your little life. Or is this denial?

Anyways, the only way to actually verify these things is to do a DNA test— if you have yet to realize it yet, adults(including your parents, tend to lie a lot). The reason your father is invested in this woman and her children can only be revealed if you are willling to do reasonable research of your own into the relationship between the two, and then confronting your father directly, not by attacking the woman. :-

Kobojunkie:
WOW... you clearly don't know much about the world outside of your little life. Or is this denial?

Anyways, the only way to actually verify these things is to do a DNA test— if you have yet to realize it yet, adults(including your parents, tend to lie a lot). The reason your father is invested in this woman and her children can only be revealed if you are willling to do reasoning research of your own and confronting your father directly, not by attacking the woman.

I just tire for this guy, I heard you rest.

Shameless women want you to fight them head-on, so they can manipulate even more and chase the kids out of their father's house.

And men tend to follow women a lot, especially when they're weak or vulnerable. So he will join her in her shamelessness: behaviour that he would have abhorred, now he will do it.

Time usually solve the issue, but sometimes Time is not on your side: a wealthy relative of mine, the shameless woman aided in sending him to his grave early (she locked him in his room and claimed he locked himself in, when he was sick and after she had confirmed that he had amended his Will to add her kids to it).

Most of them though, they leave once the money has finished but sadly the man has lost his reputation and his family by then.

natedensel:
She's not a widow, she's a woman who has a child out of wedlock, a child who's a teenager, a child my dad is now sponsoring while refusing to pay my siblings school fee and other things, as for me I never get a penny from him I'm an orphan at this point cuz he's not even there, I'm just pained for my siblings who are not able to take care of themselves yet.

In that case report the whole matter to his family members, the elderly ones that can call him to order, let me talk from the Christian perspective, if he goes to church, report him to the head pastor and the church elders will call him to order.
But if he's from a Muslim background and he's also a Muslim, forget it, he hasn't done anything wrong according to islam, the only thing they will tell him is to take care of his children.
I don't know how old are you and the age gap between you and your siblings, if he's been talked to and nothing changes, na to go hustle for Una self go win ham last last.

natedensel:
She's not a widow, she's a woman who has a child out of wedlock, a child who's a teenager, a child my dad is now sponsoring while refusing to pay my siblings school fee and other things, as for me I never get a penny from him I'm an orphan at this point cuz he's not even there, I'm just pained for my siblings who are not able to take care of themselves yet.

Nor go dey confront the woman for fight ooo!!!
She might come in full force both physically and spiritually, choose your battle wisely.

natedensel:
My I could easily make life miserable for her but I am not interested because I'm moving out as soon as possible, but what about my siblings, she has taken over everything and now she's my father's voice.

Sorry for your experience. You can't blame the woman, it's your dad's fault.
The only thing you can do is move out and start your own journey.
If I were you, I wouldn't leave peacefully tho, I'll give both the woman and the man some drama so that when next I'm around, they would not want my trouble.

Note! Before you cause any drama just ensure you have secured a house and at least 3 months feeding.
If you cause alot of trouble, by 3 months all parties involved would have settled down

So sad

But your is to blame here

You're blaming the woman that she's doing this and that instead of blaming your dad. He's the one who brought her in and is allowing her to do all she's doing.

RealityKings1:
Sorry for your experience. You can't blame the woman, it's your dad's fault.
The only thing you can do is move out and start your own journey.
If I were you, I wouldn't leave peacefully tho, I'll give both the woman and the man some drama so that when next I'm around, they would not want my trouble.

Note! Before you cause any drama just ensure you have secured a house and at least 3 months feeding.
If you cause alot of trouble, by 3 months all parties involved would have settled down

You read my mind, I'm already house hunting because what I see daily is enough to ruin my sanity, like immoral stuff, but trust me I won't leave without a fight, I must wreck damage.

natedensel:
My mum died not long ago, and my dad has a hand in her demise because her marriage was a turbulent one and she died of HBP, now shortly after she died, my dad came along with one woman who is very bold and shameless, first off she already has children from another fling not marriage, and now she comes and sleeps over, infact she's not discreet about it she's bold, brazen and doesn't feel ashamed of what she's doing.

Recently she has gotten more relaxed , she used to mind her business, she comes and do her thing and leaves, now she overstays, and she's now meddling in our family affairs, trying to mom me and my siblings now, then turning our dad away from us, now my dad sponsors her and her child from another relationship but neglects us like he did our mom.

I could easily make life miserable for her but I am not interested because I'm moving out as soon as possible, but what about my siblings, she has taken over everything and now she's my father's voice.

you people should inherit your father ASAP

How is it that your dad that brought her in and allowed her to show herself is not to blame? I don't get it, instead of you to face your dad you're pushing blame on her why

natedensel:
She's not a widow, she's a woman who has a child out of wedlock, a child who's a teenager, a child my dad is now sponsoring while refusing to pay my siblings school fee and other things, as for me I never get a penny from him I'm an orphan at this point cuz he's not even there, I'm just pained for my siblings who are not able to take care of themselves yet.

Have you tried talking to your dad about things that are of great concern like the school fees? Leave the woman out of it. You may not achieve much by dwelling on her matter. Focus on his
responsibility to you and your siblings.

Do you have older Uncles and Aunties that could be fair in assessment and that you can speak to?

Also please pray. God does move in mysterious ways to perform wonders in our lives.