₦airaland Forum

yemmit90:
➜For the very first time, I agree with you. They would be following up and down the ladies they can't afford, and when they drop bills for them, they will run to the social medias to lament. Some men will even pretend to be rich, so that she can date them. Rubbish!

Exactly! It never makes sense when such dingbats come crying as though they were forced on these women. Common sense is to date within your level, so you don't end up dumped for things like this. But no, these eejiots think it is OK to lie their way into a woman's life and then turn around to make her out as the bad person for having expectations of them.

MrSly:
➜What do women give as their bare minimum?

Most Nigerians cannot afford a woman's bare minimum, especially in today's economy. Women almost always end up with the short end of the stick when it comes to relationships.

OvertheTop:
➜relationships are transactional No Wonder Hookup became the new Norm. This is the Exact reason

Hookup is an intelligent attempt by some women to simplify the interaction they have with men to just the money and nothing else. So, if a hookup is all you need, avoid dating women entirely. More importantly, know that you can also date men, too.

ufotunang:
..let the woman go and look for work to do ...and stop depending on men to provide all her needs

She probably has a job that maybe pays her better than this man is paid at his own job. So, this was more likely not about her having a job but her wanting to date a man who can afford her and her needs.

Zackattack:
➜Women are not a commodity to be afforded. You just gave a misplaced advice here. If you itemize yourself, men would treat you as such.

If a woman itemized what she would contribute(and numerous studies have shown this to be the case, what they potentially bring to the relationship table since relationships benefit men more than women), most Nigerian men would never be able to afford her, even if he spent his whole life saving up.

MrDoGood:
[size=8pt]➜Did the op tell you he's broke? You should have advised the girl to get a job for herself. It's obvious she's broke and from a poor background.
➜ Looking for a man to fulfill her dream lifestyle. This mentality is disgusting and sickening. [/size]

Whether OP is broke or simply very stingy, the fact from that post is that he could not afford the girl, and she had to leave him so she could find herself a man who can. Simple!

2. Men do not fulfill a woman's dreams. Matter of fact, a woman who has a man in her life risks losing out on achieving her dreams and aspirations in life. So, no, she was not looking for a man to fulfill her dreams, more of a man to take care of at least some of her needs in exchange for the energy she brings to the relationship to benefit him.

Thank goodness the guy did not respond. She did not deserve a response. It is the effrontery of these girls that bother me. Dating is now gold digging or prostitution?! This generation looks doomed!
Instead of getting a job she is looking for a simp to fund the lifestyle her father couldn’t give her & her laziness will never let her achieve.
Years of Nigerian men simping is what has created this generation of gold diggers!

All this una back and forth just dey taya pesin
If woman like you, you no need pay shishi. Na out of mutual attraction una two go contribute to the growth of the relationship and its effortless.
Is because you are dealing with Chics that dont like you hence you must pay a price to have her in your life.
Ask yourself, why are you dealing with women that dont like you

Berankis:
➜Which dating rule says a man must give a woman the money to make her hair? Or that you must take care of a woman's financial needs because you are dating her? What does dating really mean to you girls of nowadays?
And what do you "dated" women have to offer except dragging equality and arguing women rights with a man? Same man you expect to care of your needs as if you are handicapped.

Are you really asking me these questions in the year 2025 because you are truly ignorant of the benefits men gain from having relationships with women? Are you really saying this because you do not know by now how many of your grandmothers and mothers were shortchanged in most of their relationships by the men they were in relationships with?
Do you want us to believe that a man who expressed his desire to a woman who wants a man who will help fund the cost of her hair care needs should be able to date her without needing to fulfill the obligation which he signed up for? Are you asking me this because even now, you do not fully realize that the man benefits more from being in a relationship than the woman does?

Kobojunkie:
If you don't like woman, don't date them or pretend they force themselves on you. You are not a victim when you pick a guy who instead wants a man who will pay for her hair. You are instead an eejiot for picking a girl that is not on the same level as you.

Your response didn't address my comment you quoted. If women are commodities to be bought with money then they shouldn't complain about being used like a commodity after being bought.

Kobojunkie:
These women do not force these men into relationships with them, you know? Men need relationships more than women do, and so if a man wants a relationship with a woman, expecting her to pour her energy into the relationship, he should be able to bring something of worthy value to the woman, rather than just his presence. That is why even a woman who earns more than a man can still require that he be able to pay some of her bills, if not all. If the man does not want to, he can walk.

The idea that men need a relationship more than women is absolutely false.

I will buy a woman with money and she shouldn't complain of being used like a product bought from the shelf.

Nefort:
➜Your response didn't address my comment you quoted. If women are commodities to be bought with money then they shouldn't complain about being used like a commodity after being bought.

I can't answer your question since it is based on assumptions that have no bearing on what I originally wrote. It is for this reason that I felt to make it clear that you have the option of dating men if women don't make sense to you as human beings who are exactly just like you — they have preferences as far as who they want to date or not date.

Nefort:
➜The idea that men need a relationship more than women is absolutely false. I will buy a woman with money and she shouldn't complain of being used like a product bought from the shelf.

What you want us to believe is that sociologists, psychiatrists, and even economists who have come to affirm this to be the case are all wrong, and you are right?

Yawn! 🥱🥱🥱

Kobojunkie:
If a woman itemized what she would contribute(and numerous studies have shown this to be the case, what they potentially bring to the relationship table since relationships benefit men more than women), most Nigerian men would never be able to afford her, even if he spent his whole life saving up.

😆😆U already accepted some clearly debunked lies here.
Go to a gathering of equal number of men and women, then compare the percentage of women that desperately want to get married to men. You will understand how foolish you sound about men benefiting more in marriages.
Continue in your delusions. Whatever helps you sleep at night.

Zackattack:
➜😆😆U already accepted some clearly debunked lies here.
Go to a gathering of equal number of men and women, then try to find out the percentage of women that desperately want to get married to men. You will understand how foolish you sound about men benefiting more in marriages. Continue in your delusions. Whatever helps you sleep at night.

Since you are desperately attempting to make this a he-said/she-said thing, then you are definitely engaging the wrong person. 🥱🥱🥱🥱

Kobojunkie:
Since you are desperately attempting to make this a he-said/she-said thing, then you are definitely engaging the wrong person. 🥱🥱🥱🥱

Marriage is a testimony for a woman.
Have you ever seen a gathering of men kneeling down to pray for a wife🤷🏽‍♂️
Whilst it is not feasibly and economically, a smart thing for a man to do, you can’t say the same for a woman. But you already know this.

Kobojunkie:
Are you really asking me these questions in the year 2025 because you are truly ignorant of the benefits men gain from having relationships with women? Are you really saying this because you do not know by now how many of your grandmothers and mothers were shortchanged in most of their relationships by the men they were in relationships with?
Do you want us to believe that a man who expressed his desire to a woman who wants a man who will help fund the cost of her hair care needs should be able to date her without needing to fulfill the obligation which he signed up for? Are you asking me this because even now, you do not fully realize that the man benefits more from being in a relationship than the woman does?

A simple question. WHAT DOES A MAN BENEFIT IN A DATING RELATIONSHIP?

Zackattack:
➜Marriage is a testimony for a woman. Have you ever seen a gathering of men kneeling down to pray for a wife🤷🏽‍♂️ Whilst it is not feasibly and economically, a smart thing for a man to do, you can’t say the same for a woman. But you already know this.

Again,

Kobojunkie:
Since you are desperately attempting to make this a he-said/she-said thing, then you are definitely engaging the wrong person. 🥱🥱🥱🥱

Berankis:
➜A simple question. WHAT DOES A MAN BENEFIT IN A DATING RELATIONSHIP?

At least one of the links included in my previous comment tells you at least one of the major benefits men gain over women.

Kobojunkie:
Again,

Yes. That’s how I know you’re a woman. Probably in her early 40s unmarried or divorced. Give me another clue. Would you?🕵️ 🕵️

Zackattack:
➜Yes. That’s how I know you’re a woman. Probably in her early 40s unmarried or divorced. Give me another clue. Would you?🕵️ 🕵️

Again,

Kobojunkie:
Since you are desperately attempting to make this a he-said/she-said thing, then you are definitely engaging the wrong person. 🥱🥱🥱🥱

Maobichek:
You nailed it oh! Entitlement mentality makes people lose their self worth, i dated entitled lady and I'm married to a woman who knows that everyone must contribute whether in relationship or marriage in other to be valued and I'm at peace and happy.

I know some Nigerian ladies based in Europe and how they contribute towards their homes (they are not entitled oh!) I also know some friends here whose wives are not entitled also. The truth is that all women do not have entitlement mentality hence people who have entitlement mentality are unserious and immature.

You are right.....

Kobojunkie:
A man giving his women money to do her hair is not a man taking the role of a father same was a friend giving his friend food to eat is not taking the role of his mother. Stop repeating this brain-damaged gutter analogy, abeg! It never works, no matter how many times you repeat it.

Kobo, you won't find a man with this line of reasoning. Trust me.

Nnamdipapa:
➜Kobo, you won't find a man with this line of reasoning. Trust me.

The reason why women are groomed from a young age into liking or wanting men in their lives has to do with the fact that if women were left to their own devices, most would actually choose not to find a man at all.

Her papa no fit take care of her... now she wants a man to take care of her

ghettochild:
➜Her papa no fit take care of her... now she wants a man to take care of her

Is he dating an underage girl or something?

Kobojunkie:
She probably has a job that maybe pays her better than this man is paid at his own job. So, this was more likely not about her having a job but her wanting to date a man who can afford her and her needs.

..she does not have a job..if you read through the message she sent to her guy..she said she normally sees what she wants to buy but she cannot buy them because her guy is not supportive ..if she had a job she would have had money to buy those items by herself..without waiting or depending much on her guy to buy....let her learn to be independent..no man can give a girl everything she wants ..

ufotunang:
➜..she does not have a job..if you read through the message she sent to her guy..she said she normally sees what she wants to buy but she cannot buy them because her guy is not supportive ..if she had a job she would have had money to buy those items by herself..without waiting or depending much on her guy to buy....let her learn to be independent..no man can give a girl everything she wants ..

People who have jobs can also see what they want to buy and expect to be able to ask their boyfriends/girlfriends for at least some of the money they need to buy it. That is normal behavior among those who are dating.

Kobojunkie:
. She says she deserves better. So, yes, let her go, and you, too, can move on to finding yourself a woman well within your range. Work on getting a woman you can afford, or better still, put all of your energy into building your financial capacity and strength so you don't run up against the same issue again.

Telling someone to ‘find who they can afford’ is lazy thinking. If your only measure of worth is money, that says more about you than the situation.

ismodiwa:
➜Telling someone to ‘find who they can afford’ is lazy thinking. If your only measure of worth is money, that says more about you than the situation.

OP or the woman did not say her only preference(not measure) in a man is a man who can afford to pay for her hair. You and others like you are responsible for reaching that conclusion. She is probably a woman who also prefers a tall man to a short man, and probably also prefers men without pot bellies.

And before you continue, everybody has preferences when it comes to dating. And she probably made it known to OP before they began dating that she preferred to date a man who could contribute to her beauty— her hair— costs. If this is established, then clearly OP had it coming.

Kobojunkie:
Whether OP is broke or simply very stingy, the fact from that post is that he could not afford the girl, and she had to leave him so she could find herself a man who can. Simple!

2. Men do not fulfill a woman's dreams. Matter of fact, a woman who has a man in her life risks losing out on achieving her dreams and aspirations in life. So, no, she was not looking for a man to fulfill her dreams, more of a man to take care of at least some of her needs in exchange for the energy she brings to the relationship to benefit him.

Did you read where Reg asked Ned "What have you done for me?"


That's my summary to everything you wrote there

Kobojunkie:
OP or the woman did not say her only preference(not measure) in a man is a man who can afford to pay for her hair. You and others like you are responsible for reaching that conclusion. She is probably a woman who also prefers a tall man to a short man, and probably also prefers men without pot bellies.

And before you continue, everybody has preferences when it comes to dating. And she probably made it known to OP before they began dating that she preferred to date a man who could contribute to her beauty— her hair— costs. If this is established, then clearly OP had it coming.

Understood 👍