₦airaland Forum

Kobojunkie:
Wrong! It is not always about convenience, as, again, if you googled it, you would see that a lot of women struggle to make enough milk to feed their babies, and so having that extra help available goes a long way. Babies need to be fed more frequently than grown children, and having that backup goes a long way.

Some women, not alot of women.... Data doesn't support your assertion...

1144AK:
➜Some women, not alot of women.... Data doesn't support your assertion...

Some women are still a lot more than 1.

Hi

Kobojunkie:
Some women are still a lot more than 1.

Ok... Continue

MONEY247:
The marriage would end up a mirrage...
#100,000 is not feasible financially for a man or woman who wants to marry and live comfortably with their spouse....
Imagine the kids
Imagine the food expense...
Transportation...
Other financial obligations and commitments

You gonna be choked......

The kids? What kids?

We need to stop or discourage poor people from having any children until they develop the financial means to cater for themselves and the child or those children.

They create unbearable stress on society and they frustrate the government’s efforts. We can’t continue with mass hunger, mass unemployment, mass poverty, mass frustration, mass deprivation etc etc These can be curtailed by reduced birth rate.

Marriage is not for a poor man. E get why! He will live in continuous agony and disrespect/disregard.

Marry someone that genuinely loves and cares for you. Together you can weather the storm. Most people started at the bottom but are doing great today.

mactoni91:
Even me earning 308k Net dey fear...
My woman earning 500k Net dey pressure me with marriage but i still dey observe.

No let any woman pressurize you into marriage... Focus on improving your income

You can be married and improve your income.

Uzobejeme:
Marry someone that genuinely loves and cares for you. Together you can weather the storm. Most people started at the bottom but are doing great today.

Yes like my wife she loves me genuinely

Solseal007:
➜Poisoned opinions! Marriage does not follow economic indices, it follows the 2 players commitment and determination to succeed in life.
➜ People who are not supposed to be advising are suddenly picking up the role merely because they are unfortunate themselves. Get married to grow in it, you will understand that things improve for couples.

You mean like the determination of the over 50 million married Nigerian couples who have been stuck in poverty over the last 10 decades?

2. Because marriage magically changes the reality of things, abi?

Uzobejeme:
➜Marry someone that genuinely loves and cares for you. Together you can weather the storm.
➜ Most people started at the bottom but are doing great today.

This will pay bills and put food on the table, how? Don't people who genuinely love and care for each other also end up homeless and miserable in marriage?

2. The vast majority of those who started at the bottom remain at the bottom for the rest of their lives. Let's start telling the truth on that.

always247:
I swear to God if i get stable and secure form of income that will fetch me 70k monthly na only death go stop me from getting married

No mind them...
I married with my savings of 40k salary.. thank God it has been upgraded to 71k
My wife a primary school teacher in a private school with 16k salary.
Today she earns 113k , as police constabulary
Guy do your doings, no look anybody, society will judge you if you no take any decision

MONEY247:
The marriage would end up a mirrage...
#100,000 is not feasible financially for a man or woman who wants to marry and live comfortably with their spouse....
Imagine the kids
Imagine the food expense...
Transportation...
Other financial obligations and commitments

You gonna be choked......

Yes, the amount is tiny but a determined would still go ahead.

It would take phenomenal discipline to make it work.

Many will chop food without meat. They may even stay in their relation house for free. My first cousin when he got married spent the first 14 years of his marraige rent free in our house. For the first few years, he was a penniless pastor and they were surviving on the wife's income as a lawyer with Lagos state. She didn't get that job until like 4 years after the wedding.

Determination is the key, love and God.

I didn't say I 100% approve of it. The Bible says he that wants to build a house should first count the cost. To each his own.

HUSTLER001:
As a single man earning 110K a month, I just cannot sustain until end of the proceeding month. Shey you dey craze ni? Shey feeding, transport,utilities,rent savings,personal effects,e.t.c dey inside d money?

I haven’t made below 250k in a month this year and I still Dey broke .. marry keh not even in my budget

Drsnives:
No mind them...
I married with my savings of 40k salary.. thank God it has been upgraded to 71k
My wife a primary school teacher in a private school with 16k salary.
Today she earns 113k , as police constabulary
Guy do your doings, no look anybody, society will judge you if you no take any decision

I haven’t no business having conversations with people that have your mindset

pigmania:
You guys should shut up. Jobless men and women still get married every year.

Omoh una like poverty for this country o

Kobojunkie:
Combined income with whom? A woman that Mr.100K would also expect submission from, in addition to treating him as head of her life in marriage, right? Poor men never know wetin don happen to them and their ilk in that country. 🥱🥱

Unfortunately, it's the poor men that are more in naija now pass rich men because of tpain.
Since poor man should and will not get married because of their financial status and women don't want to marry poor men.
Eye go clear last last! Time will always keep ticking!!!

bende7t:
➜Unfortunately, it's the poor men that are more in naija now pass rich men because of tpain.
Since poor man should and will not get married because of their financial status and women don't want to marry poor men. Eye go clear last last! Time will always keep ticking!!!

There are literally 10s of millions of reasons in Nigeria today why no woman in Nigeria should ever again consider settling for a poor man in that same Nigeria or anywhere else.

Kobojunkie:
There are literally 10s of millions of reasons in Nigeria today why no woman in Nigeria should ever again consider settling for a poor man in that same Nigeria or anywhere else.

Really Sis
But a rich man can settle for a poor woman in this same naija with little or no viable income of her own?
In this present feminist dispensation where women assume they are equally endowed with the same authority like the man!!!
That your scale is rigged Sis.
Time keeps ticking

SpencerForbes:
I’ve got some questions:

— What if both of them are earning #100,000 ?🤔

— If you’re able to save 30k monthly, what’s stopping any of them from starting a side hustle like POS or provision sales?

— Let’s imagine the lady is industrious and has a skill (hairdressing or make up skills) what’s stopping you from marrying her?

— If you’re above forty but you have a house and everything is put in place, why shouldn’t you get married?

— If the family is supportive and don’t need an elaborate wedding for now till you’re okay, should you still boycott marriage?

How can someone save 30k out of present day 100k?

Okay let me try see how that can be done.

Eat 2k food per day x 30 days = 60k.
Transport to work per day 1k x30 days = 30k
Barb your hair,buy recharge card, send 10k to dependants, buy soap, pay Nepa bill. Everything has finished and you are owing 20k

ibedun:
The kids? What kids?

We need to stop or discourage poor people from having any children until they develop the financial means to cater for themselves and the child or those children.

They create unbearable stress on society and they frustrate the government’s efforts. We can’t continue with mass hunger, mass unemployment, mass poverty, mass frustration, mass deprivation etc etc These can be curtailed by reduced birth rate.

Marriage is not for a poor man. E get why! He will live in continuous agony and disrespect/disregard.

Some people's happiness is tied to having children. Your post is semi okay until I read the part about frustrating the government's effort. Lol, like is it the government who is frustrating our efforts through inflation or another one?

bende7t:
➜Really Sis But a rich man can settle for a poor woman in this same naija with little or no viable income of her own?
➜ In this present feminist dispensation where women assume they are equally endowed with the same authority like the man!!!
➜ That your scale is rigged Sis. Time keeps ticking

1. Women bring emotional, mental and physical labor— invisible labor that they are never really ever fully compensated for— to their relationships, and so, yes, when a rich man marries himself a woman, he knows he betters his life by doing so, even when she brings no kobo to the marriage.

2. Many feminists are married, so that one way you dey talk no even mean anything at all. I am against women continuing to give their labor away for free to men who don't value, benefit them, and their dreams, in relationships, whether she is a feminist or not. We all saw how our grandmothers and mothers carried struggle-love for head, only to end up with none of their dreams realized, financially abused, in many cases, also physically abused, and most of them abandoned in marriage at the end of the day. The one's among them who turned breadwinners worked themselves to the bone, propping up a man who literally did not value them. Many were hated by the very man they regarded as their husband— all to maintain the Mrs. badge. No sane human being would want to support seeing the same continue on to even our children and grandchildren out there.

This ain't about any bullsheet authority but about women getting compensated for their efforts in marriage, which is meant to work out also in their good, not just for the man.

bende7t:
Really Sis
But a rich man can settle for a poor woman in this same naija with little or no viable income of her own?
In this present feminist dispensation where women assume they are equally endowed with the same authority like the man!!!
That your scale is rigged Sis.
Time keeps ticking

Continue looking for woman to settle with you with your account balance I don’t think you know how hard it is raising kids in this economy ,nobody likes suffer which is very reasonable

Kobojunkie:
1. Women bring emotional, mental and physical labor— invisible labor that they are never really ever fully compensated for— to their relationships, and so, yes, when a rich man marries himself a woman, he knows he betters his life by doing so, even when she brings no kobo to the marriage.

2. Many feminists are married, so that one way you dey talk no even mean anything at all. I am against women continuing to give their labor away for free to men who don't value, benefit them, and their dreams, in relationships, whether she is a feminist or not. We all saw how our grandmothers and mothers carried struggle-love for head, only to end up with none of their dreams realized, financially abused, in many cases, also physically abused, and most of them abandoned in marriage at the end of the day. No sane human being would want to support seeing the same continue on to even our children and grandchildren out there.

This ain't about any bullsheet authority but about women getting compensated for their efforts in marriage, which is meant to work out also in their good, not just for the man.

I agree with you on the part of women bringing emotional, mental and physical labor upon a man!! Una can stress man to 6feet.
We also saw our grandfathers die prematurely..most of them in active service before the age of 70. Only just hustling and toiling for the home while the women consider the very idea of giving birth in that union a privilege to the man. Na wetin God assign una to do be dat!

Can a woman impregnate herself? No
Can a woman determine the sex of a child? No
Keep underrating Men.
Sis, Men eye don dey open.
Make una dey, make we self dey.
Time won't stop ticking

blingxx:
Continue looking for woman to settle with you with your account balance I don’t think you know how hard it is raising kids in this economy ,nobody likes suffer which is very reasonable

Am also raising children in this economy. No where e touch.
If you like carry the whole bills for head.
She won't still appreciate your effort. She go leave you or change attitude once the freebies stops.
Experience is always the best teacher.
Last last all man eye go clear

bende7t:
➜I agree with you on the part of women bringing emotional, mental and physical labor upon a man!! Una can stress man to 6feet. We also saw our grandfathers die prematurely..most of them in active service before the age of 70. Only just hustling and toiling for the home while the women consider the very idea of giving birth in that union a privilege to the man. Na wetin God assign una to do be dat!
➜Can a woman impregnate herself? No Can a woman determine the sex of a child? No
➜ Keep underrating Men. Sis, Men eye don dey open. Make una dey, make we self dey. Time won't stop ticking

1. None of that is true! Most of your grandfathers had their children and wives as free laborers in the fields and at home with them. So, whatever toil killed them had nothing to do with that which they did not, of their own hands, impose on themselves. Those wives were not forced on them, and those children were not raped from their loins by those women. That stress did not come out of nowhere at them... they took on those responsibilities/burdens of their own volition. Your grandfathers suffered their own bad decisions. 🥱🥱🥱

Children typically bear the name of their fathers. If a woman is sent back to their father's home by a husband who no longer desires her, those children are most times divorced too. With no means to feed or clothe them, they become unwanted burdens to the women, who then find they have to struggle by all means to raise them or try to sell them as househelps to anyone they can. So, yes, a lot of times children are had for the man and not for the woman.

2. Yes, a woman cannot impregnate herself or determine the sex of a child(a man can't determine the sex of a child himself, since it is a game of chance). However, a woman can live a full life without having a child or a man in her life. So, why do you feel the need to define the life of a woman as only being of value when in proximity with a man, when studies show that women actually thrive a lot better without men? 🥱🥱🥱

3. This isn't about underrating men or whatever you mean by that. This is about pointing out the fact that women can thrive even without men and children in their lives. All the more reason why any woman looking to enter into a relationship with a man ought to ensure that she will equally benefit from the union, same as the man, or maybe consider that she is better off looking elsewhere or going it alone in life. Whichever decision she chooses, the key is to ensure that she goes with the path that benefits her the most, not fall for the old lies that saw to it that our grandmothers and mothers ended up with nothing to their names and dreams in the end.🥱🥱🥱

Time ticks for every man and woman out there, and death comes for all. So, it is left for each to decide what value their particular life will have as they see fit.

bende7t:
➜ Am also raising children in this economy. No where e touch. If you like carry the whole bills for head. She won't still appreciate your effort. She go leave you or change attitude once the freebies stops. Experience is always the best teacher. Last last all man eye go clear

Do you remain if your employer is no longer able to pay your salary? I wouldn't recommend anyone do that to themselves.

You want her to appreciate you while you fulfill your end of the bargain when she does not demand the same from you as she continues to fulfill hers? That you consider you are keeping your end of the marriage contract, as you are offering her freebies, is all the more reason why she should not bat an eyelid or think to remain once you are no longer able to meet your end of the bargain.

Kobojunkie:
1. None of that is true! Most of your grandfathers had their children and wives as free laborers in the fields and at home with them. So, whatever toil killed them had nothing to do with that which they did not, of their own hands, impose on themselves. 🥱🥱🥱

2. Yes, a woman cannot impregnate herself or determine the sex of a child(a man can't determine the sex of a child himself, since it is a game of chance). However, a woman can live a full life without having a child or a man in her life. So, why do you feel the need to define the life of a woman as only being of value when in proximity with a man, when studies show that women actually thrive a lot better without men? 🥱🥱🥱

3. This isn't about underrating men or whatever you mean by that. This is about pointing out the fact that women can thrive even without men and children in their lives. All the more reason why any woman looking to enter into a relationship with a man ought to ensure that she will equally benefit from the union, same as the man, or maybe consider that she is better off looking elsewhere or going it alone in life. Whichever decision she chooses, the key is to ensure that she goes with the path that benefits her the most, not fall for the old lies that saw to it that our grandmothers and mothers ended up with nothing to their names and dreams in the end.🥱🥱🥱

Time ticks for every man and woman out there, and death comes for all. So, it is left for each to decide what value their particular life will have as they see fit.

*my own grandpa was and many of his contemporaries were hard working men.
Not farmers with farmland and multiple wives
*A man determines the sex of a child because of his XY chromosome while the woman carries an XX chromosome.
*Let poor people marry in peace. Biko!!!!Stop discouraging their future partners.
*Have seen many couples starting small and are very much large today eg my good friend Doc Obiekwe, Mrs Osunlola to mention a few. Both are female and CEOs of large establishment
*Finally a good night sleep KoboJ. We continue our literary and debating society tomorrow.
Peace

Kobojunkie:
Do you remain if your employer is no longer able to pay your salary? I wouldn't recommend anyone do that to themselves.

You want her to appreciate you while you fulfill your end of the bargain when she does not demand the same from you as she continues to fulfill hers? That you consider you are keeping your end of the marriage contract, as you are offering her freebies, is all the more reason why she should not bat an eyelid or think to remain once you are no longer able to meet your end of the bargain.

I thought there is an oath of "in riches and in lack....and for better for worse till death do us apart" by the pastor or imam during the marriage ceremony
Am telling my fellow brothers that marriage is a scam. We don taste. We still dey inside the matter.
Make everybody dey their own make we check something.
Good night Ma.

bende7t:
➜*my own grandpa was and many of his contemporaries were hard working men.
Not farmers with farmland and multiple wives
➜ A man determines the sex of a child because of his XY chromosome while the woman carries an XX chromosome.
➜ Let poor people marry in peace. Biko!!!!Stop discouraging their future partners.
➜ Have seen many couples starting small and are very much large today eg my good friend Doc Obiekwe, Mrs Osunlola to mention a few. Both are female and CEOs of large establishment
Peace

1. Everyone says all these kinds of things about their grandfathers. No one comes out to admit their grandpa was a deadbeat slave driver who used his wives and children for free labor, yet we all know that many men did exactly that. No one comes forward to admit their grandfather was a murderer or a robber, yet we all know that there were quite a few men back there who were just that. And no one comes out to admit that their grandfather was a poor man or a deadbeat, even though we all know many were just that back in the 70s and 80s. So spare me.

2. Wrong! A man does not have the wherewithal to determine the sex of the child. He simply releases his semen and hopes for the best. There are only two possible outcomes, and the chances of each is 50/50 each time he does that.

3. I am against women marrying poor men. Simple! 🥱🥱🥱

4. I don't dey here that kain story since back in the 80s— during the time of SAP—, and since that time, the population of the poor in Nigeria has steadily climbed from just about 30 million in the 80s to over 170 million in 2025. 🥱🥱

In 1985, Nigeria had an estimated 34.7 million poor people, which represented 46.3% of the total population. The number of poor people had increased significantly since 1980, when the figure was 17.1 million, and the poverty rate was 27.2%.

....In 2025, approximately 139 million people in Nigeria were living below the poverty line, according to the World Bank. This represents a significant increase from 81 million in 2019 and reflects a poverty rate of about 61%. Number of poor: The World Bank estimates**

. We need to stop lying to each other at this point.🥱🥱

In Nigeria, for every one person that supposedly rises out of poverty, about 100 fall deeper into poverty. This is because the number of the poor continues to rise, even with fantastic stories such as that you tell of your friend. 🥱🥱

** This estimate does not include the number of poor who are still a bit above the poverty line, of which their estimates are around 30 million

Kobojunkie:
1. Everyone says all these kinds of things about their grandfathers. No one comes out to admit their grandpa was a deadbeat slave driver who used his wives and children for free labor, yet we all know that many men did exactly that. No one comes forward to admit their grandfather was a murderer or a robber, yet we all know that there were quite a few men back there who were just that. And no one comes out to admit that their grandfather was a poor man or a deadbeat, even though we all know many were just that back in the 70s and 80s. So spare me.

2. Wrong! A man does not have the wherewithal to determine the sex of the child. He simply releases his semen and hopes for the best. There are only two possible outcomes, and the chances of each is 50/50 each time he does that.

3. I am against women marrying poor men. Simple! 🥱🥱🥱

4. I don't dey here that kain story since back in the 80s— during the time of SAP—, and since that time, the population of the poor in Nigeria has steadily climbed from just about 30 million in the 80s to over 170 million in 2025. 🥱🥱
. We need to stop lying to each other at this point.🥱🥱

In Nigeria, for every one person that supposedly rises out of poverty, about 100 fall deeper into poverty. This is because the number of the poor continues to rise, even with fantastic stories such as that you tell of your friend. 🥱🥱

** This estimate does not include the number of poor who are still a bit above the poverty line, of which their estimates are around 30 million

You really very bitter about men. Even the grandpas. Omo!!!
I rest my case.
Kontinu!!!

bende7t:
➜I thought there is an oath of "in riches and in lack....and for better for worse till death do us apart" by the pastor or imam during the marriage ceremony
➜Am telling my fellow brothers that marriage is a scam. We don taste. We still dey inside the matter. Make everybody dey their own make we check something. Good night Ma.

You mean the meaningless words that many Nigerian men make only to declare it their right to cheat on their wives in marriage? No woman owes a man her life the same way most men would leave their wives for the side chick.

2. Marriage is not a scam! It works for those who are ready to see their partners are human beings with the same rights that they too have. There are many people enjoying marriage out there. What we have out there is simply a vast majority of cases of men married to women they literally hate — if you do not see your wife as your equal and deserving of the same rights as you do, then you see her as less than human/a slave for your benefit. It never ends well for men in such situations. And they are the ones who cry the loudest about marriage being some sort of scam.

bende7t:
➜You really very bitter about men.
➜ Even the grandpas. Omo!!! I rest my case. Kontinu!!!

Telling you that men are not entitled to the energy of women for free means I am bitter about men? Sigh!!

2. Ah! Look, I don't give a flying f-ck whether they are your great grandparents. Let's tell the truth, is what I say.

But they're allowed to carry olosho and do hookup ....
Very reason we are seeing a gradual rise in Social vices ...
Standards created by no one becoming acceptable to everyone
....
If I may ask how did people before the last two generation were able to have not just one wive but multiple yet had no office they were going to ...they lived on the proceeds of their farm and marriage was done to increase labour for work too...
Both husband and wive went to farm together and had kids that were raised comfortably