₦airaland Forum

DarkLover:
➜ I'm sick and tired of being sick & tired of my definition of a perfect life, a perfect relationship, & an ideal partner.
I guessed I'm built differently, my views are most times different & otherworldly. My ideas about relationships are being forced into making me believe that it’s unreal and only achievable in a Utopia.
I want a perfect home, devoid of the world chaos & accepted follies. A perfect partner who understood the assignment without voicing a word. The one who will stand shoulder tall with the women of essence & class out there. The one who won't be allowed to be ridiculed or disrespected.
But in all these, I guess my wants are many, they feel like I’m an egotist & a narcissist— that I demanded too much or pushed them too hard. I know that I’m just a human with a weird definition of life. My aura kinda exposes their weaknesses and insecurities in their quest for perfection, and now, I’m alone.
My girl is still on here, though I left her alone and ignored her when she needed me. I know she would read this, and probably understand my plights & in-fightings. I know we all have our shortcomings, I know you really tried to match my pace, even when it was tough and demanding. I didn't mean to leave you in the cold, and I hope that you find peace. I am sorry.

Kobojunkie:
First of all, break up with that girl who you already know cannot match your pace, no matter how she drives herself to do so. She is someone's precious daughter and does not deserve to be put through that drill — unnecessary suffering, mental and emotional anguish— only to never measure up. Abeg, set her free so she can go work on her emotional and social intelligence, as well as self-confidence, which she definitely needs to work on. 🥱🥱

Second, since you already know what you want and you don't want to seem egotistical and narcissistic about it, I suggest you begin right now dating yourself and yourself alone. Do it for as long as you can get your idea to the point that it no longer seems egotistical and narcissistic, or maybe until you realize that you are probably better off single and happy on your own— yes, it is very much OK to be single and happy by yourself than going around chasing your views. Sometimes, you are the only one who can love yourself the way you want.

DarkLover:
➜....my friend, thank you 🙂I have freed her, though very painful, but my thoughts transcend today's alone. I don't want to be single, I want to love someone & I know that someone is meant to love me too.
➜ Expression of love brings unexplainable happiness to me, so I won't be single for long.

Kobojunkie:
1. Can you start by explaining to us what love is to you? What makes you think or believe that you have the capacity to express this love to someone else? And why are you convinced that you must be loved(in a similar fashion) by someone else?

2. There are different kinds of love out there.... with romantic love just one of them. Being single does not mean one's life is devoid of love or that one does not have love in one's life. It simply means that love does not necessitate the presence of a romantic partner in one's life to be expressed or received.

More importantly, why do not want to be single? Why do not want to spend time alone with yourself in your own essence to further understand yourself, and first pour your love into yourself before you go trying to pour it into others?

Double0h7:
This reads like a teenage girl’s dream. Are you those things that you are expecting from another person?

DarkLover:

I'm sick and tired of being sick & tired of my definition of a perfect life, a perfect relationship, & an ideal partner.

I guessed I'm built differently, my views are most times different & otherworldly. My ideas about relationships are being forced into making me believe that it’s unreal and only achievable in a Utopia.

I want a perfect home, devoid of the world chaos & accepted follies. A perfect partner who understood the assignment without voicing a word. The one who will stand shoulder tall with the women of essence & class out there. The one who won't be allowed to be ridiculed or disrespected.

But in all these, I guess my wants are many, they feel like I’m an egotist & a narcissist— that I demanded too much or pushed them too hard. I know that I’m just a human with a weird definition of life. My aura kinda exposes their weaknesses and insecurities in their quest for perfection, and now, I’m alone.

My girl is still on here, though I left her alone and ignored her when she needed me. I know she would read this, and probably understand my plights & in-fightings. I know we all have our shortcomings, I know you really tried to match my pace, even when it was tough and demanding. I didn't mean to leave you in the cold, and I hope that you find peace.

I am sorry.

Tenrack:
you no get problem for this life

DarkLover:
Says you😓

Tenrack:
wahlai if you get problem, you no go even notice woman let alone say dem no get certain qualities wey you dey find.

ManknowThyself:
You got clarity!!!!!!!

As a true man, women are not supposed to be your priority of life.

Be open for good connection, then wife a discipline and respectful woman. Then make yourself, her and your kids priority of your kingdom forever as one united happy family.

Till you meet that right but not perfect woman nor settle for toxicity out of haste.

Tenrack:
Thanks for this man appreciate

DarkLover:
✓ Love to me is an expression of my inner essence outwardly, through connection, affection & care.
✓ It gets complicated while expecting the same treatment you exude, but I believe that, there are so many people out there who share my ideology of love, so getting someone shouldn't be a problem.
✓ I have had & still have so many loved ones in my life. I was never devoid of love. However, this topic revolves around romantic relationship & a path to a happy ending. I want a happy home full of love and all its branches.

Tenrack:
wahlai if you get problem, you no go even notice woman let alone say dem no get certain qualities wey you dey find.

ManknowThyself:
You got clarity!!!!!!!

As a true man, women are not supposed to be your priority of life.

Be open for good connection, then wife a discipline and respectful woman. Then make yourself, her and your kids priority of your kingdom forever as one united happy family.

Till you meet that right but not perfect woman nor settle for toxicity out of haste.

DarkLover:
..., you can as well enlighten me what Love is, in your own pov.

DarkLover:

I'm sick and tired of being sick & tired of my definition of a perfect life, a perfect relationship, & an ideal partner.

I guessed I'm built differently, my views are most times different & otherworldly. My ideas about relationships are being forced into making me believe that it’s unreal and only achievable in a Utopia.

I want a perfect home, devoid of the world chaos & accepted follies. A perfect partner who understood the assignment without voicing a word. The one who will stand shoulder tall with the women of essence & class out there. The one who won't be allowed to be ridiculed or disrespected.

But in all these, I guess my wants are many, they feel like I’m an egotist & a narcissist— that I demanded too much or pushed them too hard. I know that I’m just a human with a weird definition of life. My aura kinda exposes their weaknesses and insecurities in their quest for perfection, and now, I’m alone.

My girl is still on here, though I left her alone and ignored her when she needed me. I know she would read this, and probably understand my plights & in-fightings. I know we all have our shortcomings, I know you really tried to match my pace, even when it was tough and demanding. I didn't mean to leave you in the cold, and I hope that you find peace.

I am sorry.

DarkLover:

I want a perfect home

DarkLover:
You seem to missed the point here. I've got other priorities rightly set, I've never run after women, they're the ones after me. However, I’m in that stage where I gotta pick one. But that one must have certain qualities I desire.

Now the summary is, those qualities or standard seems to be too hard to get.

aswani:
That's your problem right there, there is no such thing. You are chasing the wind and nothing good will come out of it.

Re-orientate your mindset and you wíll find the peace you desire in your relationship(s). A healthy relationship is one where you accept your imperfections first, then that of your partner.

Thank you very much🙇🏾‍♂️

ManknowThyself:
I understand you man, was just saying men shouldn't make women the main priority of their lives.

To your conclusion!!!!!!!

Don't settle for less, you are a king and know the kind of queen you deserve.
There are still right, real but not perfect women out there with the ancient cultural values and principles of marriage.

The right connection will come.

Have a great day brother