₦airaland Forum

The way these westerners are going against biblical principles is alarming

zagorakis:
Sounds like you're not Nigerian, where are you from originally if you don't mind? I am asking because you are trying to understand street in its literal meaning.
When a Nigerian says street in a relationship context, he is referring to going back to the dating pool, which comes with "whoring" and increased body count as a woman.
At the bolded, there are alot of women the world over who are doing very well for themselves and are still single craving and begging for a man. If getting a man to commit to a woman is as easy as you highlighted would they still be single with their resources.
The problem with your folks is that they don't value the man in their lives until they lose him.

Lastly, Nigerian men are lovely, and the best in the world, when it comes to taking care of our women, once you go Nigerian you can't go back.

I am Nigerian. Both my parents are from the Orolu Kingdom of Ifon Osun, my hometown. I grew up in Lagos to my very early 20s, though my first 7 years were elsewhere. And I travel the world to educate myself instead of ignorantly thinking Nigeria is the world.

And yes, there are very lovely men in Nigeria. My wonderful amazing loving father who rests in peace was one. He didn't have to take care of my mother however, because she is a very powerful woman who can take care of herself, so they put their resources together to take care and bring up very powerful children like me who don't need to beg anyone for anything because we can get off our asses and sweat from our own brows for what we want.

So when you say what you think a Nigerian man means when he says "street", it is what Nigerian man you says, and not what every Nigerian man says. And nor does every Nigerian man or woman "go back to the dating pool, which comes with "whoring", because some actually stay married all their lives without whoring.

In my hometown we say, n'kan ti ẹyẹ ba gbe jẹ ni gbe fo. Translated is, 'what the bird swallows is what it flies with'. It means, you do what you are taught. If you are taught to "go back to the dating pool, which comes with "whoring", then that's what you will do. And if you are taught to respect your partner and treat them with love and regard and respect, you'd do that.

Now yes, there are lots of "women out there doing very well for themselves and are still single craving and begging for a man". And unfortunately, this thread shows why. Lots of you are immature boys who are very not worth having, so doing well women stay single and would rather do without. We can after all extract the only thing of value some of you have and kick you out once we are pregnant, which is really what many doing well women settle for without adding you to their baggage.

If you do have value, and I don't mean in your pants or your wallet, but in your heart and in your brain, a sensible woman would never let you go, and would likely treat you like a king. But without value, be lucky if you are ordered for the night, here's money for taxi when I'm done with you, please get out!

Seriously, I feel for you boys. The world is changing fast around you but you want to live in 1826 instead of upping your game so you have value in 2026! It's sad!

budaatum:
Why? Did you read me write somewhere that you must stay stuck to a partner that doesn't satisfy you?

Read my numerous posts in the thread. Your question has already been answered.

Perhaps, read the complete report again, as to what triggered the bill.

ono:
You have one hell of an "ideal" world view. You think nothing can ever go wrong with your tight plans. You will get a rude awakening one day and you'd remember, Ono said so. Not praying something bad happens to you or your loved ones, but be prepared for the unexpected.

Except that I live in the very real world where quite a lot of bad things have happened to me and a lot has gone very wrong with my plans, which are not as tight as you think because reality does not work the way you seem to imagine.

I'm just not willing to add to those bad things by ignorantly marrying a person who does not respect and value me, because that's like making very bad plans, and that's just plain stupid, though not the end of the world since divorce is an option.

As for your, "prepared for the unexpected", you must forgive me for not, especially if you mean bad things where marriage is concerned, because I'm far too focused on the good things I can make happen. That said though, I do have house insurance in case my house burns down.

Nothing from france surprises me anymore. Europe has fallen. Woke nonsense everywhere

Luckysbab:
Perhaps, read the complete report again, as to what triggered the bill.

It's a bill that already existed for years where I live, and backward France is just catching up due to recent happenings.

These western people have become too confused 😕, it's not better they outrightly stop anything about marriage. There civilization is becoming boring

budaatum:
I am Nigerian. Both my parents are from the Orolu Kingdom of Ifon Osun, my hometown. I grew up in Lagos to my very early 20s, though my first 7 years were elsewhere. And I travel the world to educate myself instead of ignorantly thinking Nigeria is the world.

And yes, there are very lovely men in Nigeria. My wonderful amazing loving father who rests in peace was one. He didn't have to take care of my mother however, because she is a very powerful woman who can take care of herself, so they put their resources together to take care and bring up very powerful children like me who don't need to beg anyone for anything because we can get off our asses and sweat from our own brows for what we want.

So when you say what you think a Nigerian man means when he says "street", it is what Nigerian man you says, and not what every Nigerian man says. And nor does every Nigerian man or woman "go back to the dating pool, which comes with "whoring", because some actually stay married all their lives without whoring.

In my hometown we say, n'kan ti ẹyẹ ba gbe jẹ ni gbe fo. Translated is, 'what the bird swallows is what it flies with'. It means, you do what you are taught. If you are taught to "go back to the dating pool, which comes with "whoring", then that's what you will do. And if you are taught to respect your partner and treat them with love and regard and respect, you'd do that.

Now yes, there are lots of "women out there doing very well for themselves and are still single craving and begging for a man". And unfortunately, this thread shows why. Lots of you are immature boys who are very not worth having, so doing well women stay single and would rather do without. We can after all extract the only thing of value some of you have and kick you out once we are pregnant, which is really what many doing well women settle for without adding you to their baggage.

If you do have value, and I don't mean in your pants or your wallet, but in your heart and in your brain, a sensible woman would never let you go, and would likely treat you like a king. But without value, be lucky if you are ordered for the night, here's money for taxi when I'm done with you, please get out!

Seriously, I feel for you boys. The world is changing fast around you but you want to live in 1826 instead of upping your game so you have value in 2026! It's sad!

Its funny how you think because you work and earn money you automatically are better than everyone and equal to men. No you are not rather that mindset will keep you single, bitter and lonely, it is not an advise.

Alot of Nigerian men and women home and abroad are well read and well travelled, yet quietly contributing meaningfully to their society unlike you gallivanting the corridors of social media with microphone announcing to the world how you are working and making money. Just so you know, people in Nigeria do not give a heck about you and your resources, your education and resources are inconsequential to men and women in Nigeria unless you are adding value, keep that in mind.

For the bolded. If you must stay married to avoid whoring, you must be giving your husband, if at all you have one his conjugal rights otherwise you will be flinged back to the street, else travel to France and get yourself a man to manipulate everyday if at all you can get a man.

budaatum:
So you now have stooped so low that you have to insult my loving caring considerate African father who treated my amazing wonderful loving African mother like the queen she is, and is the sort of man I thought you might be?

I guess you now can see why you had to be interviewed and assessed so I don't marry a regret and have to divorce you!

Or don't you think your words reveal your mind?

Should I think you can treat me as I deserve when you insult my father?

You did not consider your father's care and love when you dismissed African men as pigs

Your system of assessment is defective if any of its parameters view African men as pigs

Should I think you will treat me better than a pig when you see your father as one?

budaatum:
If they hadn't evolved, they surely would have died, or at least be like some third world country that places a low value on half its population.

For your information in case you don't know. When Europe were exporting their Bible to Africa, they were abandoning ignorant beliefs and were advancing into the knowledgeable age of enlightenment, and it pains me to see that some are still in the darkness they promoted to you.

Without the Bible they had, they will never have the current enlightenment their civilization possesses. You can evolve and keep evolving into oblivion. A society that prioritizes emotional individualism over functional home and family is bound to die a natural death with time. Time will tell if they were right.

Ironfaceman:
This most be the most disgusting read I've seen today.

Without sex there's no relationship, man got into marriage to fulfil a sacred order and sex is one of it.

It's in the vow for better or worst in sickness and in health.

If you most take permission to have sex with your wife, you might as well pay a woman money for sex.

Whereby the objectivity of sex has been fettered to reason.

They even said this: "The proposed law also makes it impossible to use lack of sexual relations as an argument in fault-based divorce."

Can u imagine? The men are cooked. Who are these modern men? Why are they this weak? Like u cant even opt of marriage becus of poor sex from ur partner. WTF

budaatum:
You are funny.

Yes, I have sons. And I have educated them to respect and love their wives, whom they have wisely chosen. And the one thing they will never ever say is "You just another woman", because I brought them up to be loving and caring and respectful of other human beings regardless of gender, race, colour, tribe etc etc etc, so its unlikely their wives will wake up one day and yell rape and divorce.

But if they do divorce, they very likely wouldn't lose all their life work because their wives have jobs too, and earn considerable incomes. And the law where they live might even give the children to my sons and tell her to pay him instead.

Unlike some you see, they married their equal, and not some poor uneducated girl from some village that they can exploit.

The world doesnt revolve around your feelings.. your sons are not different from most men out there.. that have been victims of carefully choosen wives who where loved and cared for , but choose to heed evils ways. Except off course you beleive bad things only happen to bad people.

You dont know what your gender is capable of doing... and i pray you dont experience it directly or indirectly. You not honest and a reslistic person if you think good men dont fall victims...

One of the danger of allowing feminists in the corridor of power, if France men for whatever reasons allow this law to be pass, they'll live to pay dearly for it, generations after generations, because once you marry your wife, you become the wife, while she becomes the husband that dictate how the marriage works and you can't divorce her easily, imagine sharing same room and bed with your wife, but you can't have sex with her when you are in the mood, it must be only when she wants it.

Make this kind law no reach Africa shaaa.

Lying liar 🤥

IamAsiri:
I once heard the story of a man caught trying to force himself on his wife lying on the hospital bed shortly after giving birth. In this case too, there is nothing wrong in the man finding pleasure? Na so e bad reach?

That is sure banker. No man canive like that.

Idaytesj29:
Europeans especially French women should forget about getting married forever after the passage of this law.

That's my fear exactly

Omalicious1:
This will discourage so many people from getting married...gradually, we are getting closer to what was predicted by 2030

Ironfaceman:
This most be the most disgusting read I've seen today.

Without sex there's no relationship, man got into marriage to fulfil a sacred order and sex is one of it.

It's in the vow for better or worst in sickness and in health.

If you most take permission to have sex with your wife, you might as well pay a woman money for sex.

Whereby the objectivity of sex has been fettered to reason.

with this , there is no need for the union.
i just hope the man is not paying all the bills...

that will be slavery...
paying bill for you and your room mate

lecowas:
This is just a normal thing even if it's not in the law, whenever someone lies with another person who is not "in the mood", something just doesn't feel right, cos both parties have to be actively involved.

No one should be forced to have coitus even if they are your spouse. What a lady decades ago still felt like rape even though physically stronger than her. No means No.

I get your point...
But let us be realistic....
if this goes on for months, what will be your take on the union?

Josen:
So can the concept of infidelity be erased as well?
If the wife cannot consent to sex, I think the man has the basic right as well to look elsewhere for his aim or the term "Marriage" needs to be redefine.

Exactly

Kukutente23:
Lol
Sex is a spontaneous biological act based on hormones not a mechanical act
I don't understand you guys sha. You mean you can't have morning sex with your wife?
Like you have to first wake her, tell her you'll like to have sex with her gracious permission of course and then she gives you go ahead before you get an erection?

if she says No, you go matub in the Bathroom
if this continues for months, the man should just outsource the task to service providers

After briefly reading through this...... to Japa no dey hungry me cos wtf :

Ironfaceman:
https://www.bbc.com/news/articles/cgjwxdz45ywo

budaatum:
Sex is not "a mechanical act" is precisely why it can't be a duty I am obligated to perform when I don't want to!

I sure would want to have sex with you, husband, if you make yourself desirable and irresistible. I'd in fact be the one waking you up with your bit in my mouth because I love you so much and enjoy you. I just hope you don't want to divorce me because I can't leave you alone.

But know it's not got anything to do with the content of your wallet or pants when I'm more interested in your very irresistible smart kind considerate loving mind.

budaatum:
I'm your wife, and not just some woman who jumps on you anytime I want!

The judge you intend to sue me before is not stupid like you think! And I definitely wouldn't have married you in the first place if this is how shallow you reason!

Please read my other posts on the thread and get with the program!

Holla, it's quite a bliss that you're with a Significant Other that you both understand yourselves and still get jiggy at your current age.

However, understand that getting sexual with him without a prior notification plus consent counts as rape.

Ironfaceman:
...
Previously, rape was defined as a sexual act carried out with "violence, constraint, threat or surprise". Now it is any act where there is no "informed, specific, anterior and revocable" consent. Silence or an absence of reaction do not imply consent, the law says.
https://www.bbc.com/news/articles/cgjwxdz45ywo

Let that sink in a bit. While you have an understanding SO at the moment, a future friction between you guys could have him listing all those times you thought were intimate and mutual as an abuse of his physical body because you never asked and he never coherently said yes.
Understand that perfect obedience to some laws would have many more infracting if held to full standards.

Now, I'm not any advocate for those forcing their SOs just to cure their own konji, that's not allowed. Just because I say "I do" does not give you the right to tackle me down and do as you wish to my body despite my clear expression to not wanting to. The grouse I have is that it would be used to deprive those that wish to have a divorce from doing so as they do not wish to rape their partners and as well do not want to live in a sexless union.

For men, the expectation of conjugals is what has made them desire marriage or be with a partner in a romantic union. Remove sex and what I can tell you this as a man that I am is that less that 20% of relationships would remain if the expectation of sex is removed. This will affect current marriages and the future of marriage as a whole.

I'll give you an instance of how it can be misused. This is even Nigeria I will be using as an example.
After our first child, my then court married wife (now ex) told me that since I did not do traditional wedding, no more sex. I said "No problem". Thank God for Vaseline Crew, I survived without issues. Three weeks later in the middle of the night, she woke me up and said "Let's have sex". I consented, no issues with me as I knew i was obligated to her despite her abusing it on her own. (Childbirth was not an issue here as she was even the one that got people to talk on her behalf before I consented to us having a second child. Neither was my performance on low par. I have to say this part before someone claims probably child stress or I don't know how to treat a woman in da other room).

Today, we are divorced and one thing I came out with was that, all I got in marriage could equally be gotten outside marriage. All further relationships I had afterwards had a no marriage expectation discussion ahead. People change after the title of Mr and Mrs kicks in and I was not ready to repeat the same dramas.

Marriage is a wonderful thing and if people now have the constitutional rights to hoard the Coochie or the D, it would become less and less of what it is expected to represent in the society and the family units begins to crumble. Even young men are encouraged to be responsible and get married so they don't become nuisances chasing every girl in skirts but rather have their own THE ONE.

For those in France, let the status quo be. Whomever is not ready to do the do should not inhale a whiff of that sanctity called marriage and the expectations that come with it.

Wishing you well - Teemy

budaatum:
It's a bill that already existed for years where I live, and backward France is just catching up due to recent happenings.

Good to know.

Now, does it imply that the husband can't divorce a wife who refuses him conjugal relations for any length of time or not?

This is the bone of contention

Dtruthspeaker:
Save for marital rape, your other points are super valid.

But on marital rape you are wrong because some beasts of a husband have had their wives raped even though no one expects that a husband to do such an evil thing

How can a husband possibly rape his wife... why should his wife deny him sex ?? What she signed for ... these same women will work in offices where they drain them... will they now say they will onky come to the office when they feel like ... marriage is a contract, just like a job is a contract.... if a wife or husband denies their partner sex, they should sue

budaatum:
Not where you live perhaps, which is probably why some of you come here with your backward thinking and end up being deported or jailed.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c4grr3368n3o

So because white man says says ...it now means its forward thinking....so white men can make bad rules?? Slave mentality... same white men that say that we have more than 2 genders and that a man can marry a man ...

IamAsiri:
This is also crazy.

It gives the closeted LGBTs the opportunity to deceive their spouses into marriages that they will not be able to come out of.

I didn't even think of that!

cr7lomo:
So because white man says says ...it now means its forward thinking....so white men can make bad rules?? Slave mentality... same white men that say that we have more than 2 genders and that a man can marry a man ...

It is not because white man says, but because it's the wise thing to do to treat both genders equally.

Luckysbab:
Good to know.

Now, does it imply that the husband can't divorce a wife who refuses him conjugal relations for any length of time or not?

This is the bone of contention

The thing most of you don't quite get is in the following, and especially the italics:

The proposed law also makes it impossible to use lack of sexual relations as an argument in fault-based divorce.

Most of you don't know what "fault-based divorce" is and the consequences of it, and that it applies to both genders. And you can't be bothered to research it, which just shows a serious lack of brain use and is rather pathetically sad.

Of course a person can divorce their partner, including a wife (or husband) who refuses him him (or her) conjugal relations for any length of time. You can always go to court and say you don't want to be married to that person anymore and divorce. You can even claim it's because of refusal of conjugal relations. What you can't do is claim it's their fault, because that has certain consequences, and that consequence is all that France is removing here.

cr7lomo:
How can a husband possibly rape his wife...

By not accepting no means no!

cr7lomo:
why should his wife deny him sex ??

Here's a very short list!

She's tired.

She's bored of you.

You don't satisfy her.

She has cancer.

You are lousy in bed.

She's getting better sex with a better man.

Etc.

Etc.

Etc.

teemy:
However, understand that getting sexual with him without a prior notification plus consent counts as rape.

No it doesn't.

Just as he is not so stupid to call the police and accuse me of theft because I took 10 francs out of his pocket, so is he not stupid to claim I raped him because I got sexual with him without "prior notification plus consent".

We wouldn't have married if he was that stupid, and the police and court he takes that stupid accusation to is not stupid neither.

If I however beat my husband over the head with a pestle to knock him out and tie him up to restrain him and then "got sexual" with him all without "prior notification plus consent", I'm very certain my ass will end up in jail for a considerable amount of time, and not only for spousal rape, but for battering and abuse too. But I don't think he'd have married me if I were psycho like that.