What My Fiancee's Pastor Told Me The Day I Met Him. - Romance

What My Fiancee's Pastor Told Me The Day I Met Him. - Romance - Nairaland

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What My Fiancee's Pastor Told Me The Day I Met Him. by Toolegit123(op): 1:36pm On Mar 23

Good day everyone.

So recently I've been thinking about marriage. Tho I'm in a relationship but the woman I've been dating doesn't really seem to have the same serious interest and intentions like me. I've talked to her severally but it seems she isn't ready to settle down yet. Imagine this is someone whom I've gone to see her people and they know me well. My own people know her too. I've equally talked to her mom since she's the one parent she has . And had also talked to her best friend about it too.

But one thing I've noticed about her is that she's over religious and seems to be too close to her pastor. The last time I talked to her about the marriage stuff,she directed me to go and talk to her pastor. Tho I was initially furious about it but I just had to man up,kill my pride and decided to pay her pastor a visit.

From the conversation I had with her pastor,it seems he's one of the major stumbling blocks. Because he was only curious about my financial status sad

he was even asking me what was my source of livelihood,and of which I told him. Afterwards,he then asked me what was my monthly salary. Saying if I'm sure I can take care of my fiancee with that amount,or if I'm planning to have a side hustle. That he doesn't want a case where any of her spiritual daughter will go into a marriage where she'll be suffering. I told her categorically clear that I'm not a lazy man and I don't intend to put anyone's daughter into suffering in the name of marriage.

It's been over a week since I left the pastor's office, and since then,my fiancee has been behaving so cold towards me.

So I don't know whether to continue with my proposal or I should just kindly look for another lady to marry.

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Re: What My Fiancee's Pastor Told Me The Day I Met Him. by Bluntguy: 1:54pm On Mar 23

Don't you think that her pastor's attitude and hers are red flags? Must it be her? Bro you cannot cry over what cannot cry over you o.

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Re: What My Fiancee's Pastor Told Me The Day I Met Him. by angelboy01(m): 1:57pm On Mar 23

When a woman manipulates you this is the result. There's a quote that says look for someone who loves you more than you love her. Man up, ghost her and get someone new. All this simping attitude will take you no where. When there are many fishes in the sea but it's someone who doesn't care about you that you are worrying yourself over.

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Re: What My Fiancee's Pastor Told Me The Day I Met Him. by Uptheante(m): 2:07pm On Mar 23

Simple answer = Call off the wedding & search for a new girl who is interested in you & can take decision by herself. As it stands, the pastor is the one controlling your so-called fiancee & influencing her decisions.

Even if he 'permits' her to marry you, he will still be controlling her in the marriage, you will have no say in her decisions because she obviously respects & trust the pastor more than you.

Don't be surprised the so-called pastor is already banging her & will continue banging her even if she marries you.

There are thousands & millions of single girls available that are even better than her, don't kpai yourself over her. Go for other girls ✌️

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Re: What My Fiancee's Pastor Told Me The Day I Met Him. by Pious101: 2:53pm On Mar 23

U better pick up Ur shoes and flee

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Re: What My Fiancee's Pastor Told Me The Day I Met Him. by ogaprime(m): 3:00pm On Mar 23

Better use your tongue to count your teeth. You never meet your wife.

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Re: What My Fiancee's Pastor Told Me The Day I Met Him. by franugo(m): 3:06pm On Mar 23

Make I go see pastor before you go accept my proposal? Lolz, get some things I go read, na laugh I go first laugh.
Anyway, you have 2 choices, let her go and find a better suited partner, overly religious retards are probably the worst set of people you can make a life partner.
Second choice, continue dating and wasting her time till she's the one that will now be begging for you to wife her up

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Re: What My Fiancee's Pastor Told Me The Day I Met Him. by franugo(m): 3:07pm On Mar 23

I think the pastor is female

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Re: What My Fiancee's Pastor Told Me The Day I Met Him. by AKWATGOLD1(m): 4:49pm On Mar 23

Red Flag for me.

@Toolegit123, i can bet it with you if you eventually married this lady one of the following will happened:
1. You might be ATM machine to the church
2. There might be paternal fraud in your marriage.

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Re: What My Fiancee's Pastor Told Me The Day I Met Him. by Wealthyonos(m): 5:18pm On Mar 23

She stay calm, don't call her.

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Re: What My Fiancee's Pastor Told Me The Day I Met Him. by Uptheante(m): 5:25pm On Mar 23

From the narration, the pastor is a male.

Notice that the OP used the pronouns "he" "him" & "his" when narrating about the pastor

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Re: What My Fiancee's Pastor Told Me The Day I Met Him. by franugo(m): 6:26pm On Mar 23

Must have had a concussion while reading it cause I was thinking it's a female pastor. I don't even bother with such religious nutjobs, let them go and find male religious nutjobs to marry, they're definitely plenty enough

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Re: What My Fiancee's Pastor Told Me The Day I Met Him. by Jayboi(m): 6:38pm On Mar 23

What other flag do you need. Man up and call off the engagement. Do it for your pride. You simply aren't her man. Don't waste your time and that of the girl.

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Re: What My Fiancee's Pastor Told Me The Day I Met Him. by ARISHEM: 6:38pm On Mar 23*

How can you be dating someone that don't have the same serious interest and intentions like you. And you call that a relationship. undecided

You are dating nobody.

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Re: What My Fiancee's Pastor Told Me The Day I Met Him. by Lamanii22(f): 6:48pm On Mar 23

Abort mission pleass, she should go and marry her Pastor then...

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Re: What My Fiancee's Pastor Told Me The Day I Met Him. by Starboytwo(m): 7:04pm On Mar 23

I remember one girl, Tanwa…

She came to my house, few minutes later “my pastor say” before she finish the sentence she don dey outside my house…

You dey craze… you dey do my pastor say in front of me… you no even fear…

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Re: What My Fiancee's Pastor Told Me The Day I Met Him. by breathless(m): 8:29pm On Mar 23

Having someone else that has a stronghold on a partner other than you, is a recipe for a troubled marriage. You're not a consideration except for your economic value.
Bro, quietly move on, though might be painful but you'll get over it with time and find who's really meant for you.
All the best.

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Re: What My Fiancee's Pastor Told Me The Day I Met Him. by Fekumzi123: 8:42pm On Mar 23

Red flag looking at you in 3D.
It will end in regret no be curse.
No matter your financial status, your woman is supposed to show more seriousness than you. You're doing her a favor not the other way round.
Good luck

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Re: What My Fiancee's Pastor Told Me The Day I Met Him. by Harddiskng(m): 9:16pm On Mar 23

Instead of him to thank God for revealing something about his girlfriend that could potentially destroy his marriage and also thank his head then move on with his life

baba is here, asking 99 questions. Anyways a lesson must be learnt

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Re: What My Fiancee's Pastor Told Me The Day I Met Him. by kiddaz: 9:25pm On Mar 23

Old man when nor wise. Nor go look for girl when dey same page with you, dey there dey ask questions

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Re: What My Fiancee's Pastor Told Me The Day I Met Him. by Dtruthspeaker: 9:41pm On Mar 23

Whom God is punis..., He first makes mar....

Re: What My Fiancee's Pastor Told Me The Day I Met Him. by marlow1962(m): 9:50pm On Mar 23

I'm really sorry for you, for the path you're about to walk in is a path regret.

Imagine telling a man to go meet your pastor first before even considering marriage.
Worst sets of women you can marry are those brainwashed so clean by their pastors.

@op leave her if she's not interested, not let her be your only option, na she go tire, maybe by then you go don find one wer like and ready for u.

Very soon she go begin attend shilo.

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Re: What My Fiancee's Pastor Told Me The Day I Met Him. by Greattom: 9:57pm On Mar 23

Some of you lack love from your home ,that's why you seek love from an outsider,she and her pastor are treating you like a thrash ,you still come here and be asking nonsense question.

Is she an handicapped that cannot take care of herself.

Wake up from your sleep and look for a capable woman

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Re: What My Fiancee's Pastor Told Me The Day I Met Him. by BigYash: 10:42pm On Mar 23

Week man. You are seeing red billboard,you came here still asking questions

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Re: What My Fiancee's Pastor Told Me The Day I Met Him. by Dreal1247: 5:48am On Mar 24

In a proper settings, the pastor has to ensure that the member marries and settles comfortably. They ensure that the couple maintain the Bible dating and courtship standard. But if you are already sleeping with the lady in question, you are already married. You only need to pay the bride price and the marriage blessing. The church has a standard in overseeing people getting married. The pastor would have handed you people over to the marriage committee. They will even inspect the man's house to know if he is fit for marriage. Some ladies have been deceived into marriage only to discover later that the man doesn't have a house.

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Re: What My Fiancee's Pastor Told Me The Day I Met Him. by amoco(m): 5:52am On Mar 24

Were you able to discuss the finances convincingly with her?

From your narration it appears she/her people are unsure of the financial stability after the wedding.
Discuss how the 2 of you will support your family financially and pull through in the new future family.

I think this is her greatest fear from your write up.

Re: What My Fiancee's Pastor Told Me The Day I Met Him. by ehikserons: 5:56am On Mar 24

Re: What My Fiancee's Pastor Told Me The Day I Met Him. by pdata: 6:43am On Mar 24

Your number 1 mistake was telling your fiancée how much you make

Number 2. Mistake letting your wife's family or her pastor to know how much you make

It is none of their business, what happens to praying if you guys are compatible spiritually , when ever questions about your finances is asked, trust me it never goes down well , they have already sized you , they just want a validation and conclusion, never ever fall for it again.

Thirdly, if a women love you well enough, they would go extra miles with you regardless of your financial status , they will fight for you , believe in you and be willing to endure with you. Don't let any alpha male tell you otherwise , i'm so experienced in this matter of relationship and love. Until you find that person, don't cry over who no fit cry over you as @ Bluntguy state above.

Fourthly, love is a reflex action and the heart wants what it wants, don't force anybody to spend the rest of their life with you, there are many ladies that loves you that you are also not willing to give a chance in your life, they didn't report you on nairaland. You have your own reservation why you don't want them and that is perfectly fine, because the heart want what it wants. So move on and start a new life with someone that will value you and bring out the best in you, marriage is too boring than attempting to spend it with someone who doesn't truly love you. You don't want to wake up to words like "And I didn't want to marry you o" It will run you crazy bro. You will beg for a rebirth and it will be too late.

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Re: What My Fiancee's Pastor Told Me The Day I Met Him. by gift2xl: 8:49am On Mar 24

So your blind to know that she might be sleeping with the pastor. Any woman that value her pastor more than her man is a red flag... Flee fast fast or you cry premium tears.

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