₦airaland Forum

emmaodet:
There is a lady i met who was very very desperate to marry but just meeting hit and run guys.
After so many back and fort, we became close and she loosened up. I started learning cold hard bitter lessons from her.
She changes men like a diaper. She hardly run a relationship for 3 month without either party breaking up. A highly damaged lady.
She usuallly call me Bestie - always telling me about the guys she just meet, our Ex, the past and present, blah blah blahs
The guys that bang her like mad, the ones that just spend but can't bang etc Some of the things i learnt from her are but not limited to -
1. Poor/struggling guys are invicible to her - whille she complains alot about not getting a guy for commitment , i noticed poor guys approaching her regularly are invicible to her. She will only tell me about guys doing fine disturbing her though she told me a handsome but struggling far distant bf, begging her daily to move in with her is being ignored. The guy is teaching in a private schoool in calabar struggling financially while her pussy is bastardily decimated in lagos.She is holding out, bidding her time to see if she can still get a rich simp to marry. The poor boy is the last option.
2. Of recent she met an old NNPC manager (a money bag), within 2 weeks she has billed and milked the man 60k (though chicken change to him) and telling me she wants to use getting a house format to milk him another 250k (Jesssss) despite telling her to slow down and take it slowly, she didn't answer me.
3. Occassionally, she will ask me of format to use in milking guys for money. One time, she acted very very very sick to the old man. He called for like 3 days without she picking, maybe receiving another dick somewhere. After the 3rd day, she picked and was talking in a very sick way, that she is sick because she is missing him. The old simp quickly sent money for treatment while taking a flight from abuja to lag by the weekend to come see her why she laughs and make mockery of the man with her format.
I saw a first hand way how women coldheartedly milk men.
4. She is a nairalander

Thank you

Sir, reading these again, women are these cold, selfish and ruthless in putting their agenda first, men have to wise up

JESHAL007:
Sir, reading these again, women are these cold, selfish and ruthless in putting their agenda first, men have to wise up

So, the way the girl behaving is the way all girls behaving? You never see lady in which men usually take advantage of her? Not only her body even her money?

You also want to tell me, some guys that are brutal in relationship just like that lady? is that how all guys behaving?

You people must learn how to reasoning broadly and diffuse yourself from gender bias, if indeed you want better society.

Fiscus105:
So, the way the girl behaving is the way all girls behaving? You never see lady in which men usually take advantage of her? Not only her body even her money?

You also want to tell me, some guys that are brutal in relationship just like that lady? is that how all guys behaving?

You people must learn how to reasoning broadly and diffuse yourself from gender bias, if indeed you want better society.

It's not gender bias it's an overwhelming reality, women have the upper hand in the sexual market place, an overwhelming 70% of divorce is initiated by women in countries that keep record, women initiate most breakups, I'm not saying men can't be the source of issue in dating, relationship and marriage, but in most cases it's women , remember they by default for existing have an abundance of hornny men who want sex or relationship with them, they have the advantage

@martinez39s these is my issue with bluepilled folks and individuals that haven't internalised the redpill, they are lucky they are in conservative Africa that the laws and institutions aren't gynocentric, again the redpill is not about gender war or blaming women for things that nature imbibed them with, it's a practical praxeology describing the reality of the dating market place in these modern era, our ancestors didn't even need the redpill because they had the common sense to understand that female hypergamy has to be checkmated like ensuring women married as virgins to ensure paternity of children to the husband and prevent cuckoldry, Africa men have the luxury of being ignorant of female nature but if they migrate abroad they are in for a rude awakening

JESHAL007:
The brutal reality is that there is virtually nothing you can do to make a woman attracted to you. If a woman categorized you as a sexually unattractive man after meeting you, no amount of game, Redpill sense, or masculine frame is going to change it. The best thing to do is to forget about her and keep it moving. Trying to win her over with "dating drills" and Redpill game is a waste of time, or worse, a self-inflicted humiliation

You are right, and even if you want to create attraction, do it that first day she saw you .

JESHAL007:
The brutal reality is that there is virtually nothing you can do to make a woman attracted to you. If a woman categorized you as a sexually unattractive man after meeting you, no amount of game, Redpill sense, or masculine frame is going to change it. The best thing to do is to forget about her and keep it moving. Trying to win her over with "dating drills" and Redpill game is a waste of time, or worse, a self-inflicted humiliation

This is GOATED. From day one when I am talking with a lady, I let her know I am looking at her bum giving off sexual vibe, if she then later categorize me as sexually unattractive I sharply JBF her.

It's still funny that even handsomeness sometimes no dey make women sexually attractive to you.

Vicboy1:
You are right, and even if you want to create attraction, do it that first day she saw you .

I really don't know if you can create that attraction, cause women attraction is different from men. Sometimes your flashy things might not attract her, maybe just interest her.

I might be wrong tho.

JESHAL007:
It's not gender bias it's an overwhelming reality, women have the upper hand in the sexual market place, an overwhelming 70% of divorce is initiated by women in countries that keep record, women initiate most breakups, I'm not saying men can't be the source of issue in dating, relationship and marriage, but in most cases it's women , remember they by default for existing have an abundance of hornny men who want sex or relationship with them, they have the advantage

Like so true, if you don't have intimacy with a woman another man will, if you are stingy with your resources with her another man will be so generous with her.
Truly who rules the world -- GIRLS

you guys are still trying to figure out women nawa oo.

This thread still dey

To be clear, engaging with women in permanent living arrangement would involve some level of "simping" as you'll be expected to provide as a man to get sex, companionship and your bloodline passed on. Realistically, you can't always hold frame 100% of the time but at least, be smart enough to recover when you seem to be losing

Fiscus105:
So, the way the girl behaving is the way all girls behaving? You never see lady in which men usually take advantage of her? Not only her body even her money?

You also want to tell me, some guys that are brutal in relationship just like that lady? is that how all guys behaving?

You people must learn how to reasoning broadly and diffuse yourself from gender bias, if indeed you want better society.

Are they saying every single woman is like that or majority?

Think, man!

Once men reach this maturity...ain’t nothing breaking them no more.. she really wanna eat her cake and have it pic.twitter.com/tqz3SYRgnx

— 👑𝗞𝗶𝗻𝗴𝗷𝗼𝗻𝗮𝗵🌴🥥 (@_kingjonah) March 18, 2026

Martinez39s:
I have read skepticus's analyses so far up till this point. All I can is that when people refuse to learn or listen, just let them do what they please; if they learn the hard way, let them bear the burn and don't stress yourself comforting them. All we will give them is a sarcastic "sorry." That's my principle.

Some red-pill men think they are so special that they can find "quality women" (translation: a woman who is a nawalt as long as they play the alpha and hold frame). They think they are invincible or different or that what happened to others won't happen to them. I have seen one on this thread that believes no woman will cheat on redpiller; who knows how many more delusions are out there among our redpillers? Or how many believe these delusions? Some married men in gynocentric societies who have read the Rational Male wrongly think that they can put themselves in a marriage situation, where the wife has all the power, and still command her submission and flex their authority just because they are maintaining frame. Though we call women "fish brain", but they are not that stupid when they are manipulating and working in their best interest. Who are you that female nature should make an exception of you? There are territories and situations that even core redpillers avoid because they know female nature won't spare them.

Those that will learn will learn. I am sure that during Casillas's career, a lot of people would have pointed to his marriage and the kissing scene on TV as signs and evidence of good relationship with a good woman. They didn't know that things change with time and intentions usually reveal themselves with time. "Be a HVM and everything will workout with women" they say.... that's why £16,000-per-week Lovren's wife was cheating on him with a £200-per-month forestry worker.

Those that will learn will learn; those that stubborn, filled with hubris, and delusional are playing with fire. Except they become victims of blissful ignorance till death, they are in for a big shock and regret. Notice that Casillas's wife was intentional in her ways and started divorce proceedings after Casillas passed his earning peaks so that she could cash out; the fact that a woman is stroking your ego by giving the illusion that are you in control and you are an alpha doesn't mean she is not planning the divorce and doing her calculations.

Refreshing reminder, women are way ahead in terms of calculation no matter how redpilled you are and the society you find yourself

@ emmaodet, saw your diary on that married woman cheating on her husband, Jesus, sir, will you advice one to marry like these, let's remember these our generation women are not like the 90's and early 2000's women, even these so-called women are promiscuous, tiktok women are going to skyrocket cheating and divorce, it's sad, i would always say these if you didn't meet your wife as a virgin and she's used to sex before she married you, that spirit of fvcking can't leave her it will enter marriage

Kaymicheal852:
I'm also a legend on this thread lol ,I come across it in 2021 and I'm very active for 3 years before I only come here once in awhile

Although I have come across Gonzalo lira ( redpil coach) on YouTube and I have assimilate redpil very well, but coming across it here also help

I'm now married to a women I met after redpil and I have a 7 months old boy ,I would say I don't always get things right but redpil have been one of the best thing ever happened to me

Before redpil I'm obviously not a simp but I don't understand women and interact with them in a wrong way and I badly got burnt by one particular community pussy 🤣 and I learnt my lesson


Redpil is golden my guys , whether you're new here or you have been here before, you have to embrace redpil, learn assimilate and understand, overcome the rage stage and you will start seeing women for who they are, there are not worth your slightest headache at all

Women shouldn't be one of your problem in life , just focus on your life , you're all that's important, a women who wants you will always be with you,no matter your situation and don't ever made the mistake of falling in love , because women are never in love but in business, most of them are just trying to survive, don't become a ladder they will use to climb up


I didn't give my wife anything of high value till I eventually marry her last year after she have been waiting for 4 years, I even cheat ,dump her but I never abuse or maltreated her , and she always stays , her mother died in 2023 and I never visited her family and her father is not happy with me about that but I don't care because she is always with me

If you're the type that can't live with a woman or is aggressive and lacks empathy pls don't marry a women, it's not for everyone, all my girlfriend have always stays at my place for most of the time, so my wife have lived with me 70% of the time since we met ( for those who might think it's not that long since we get married so I might be wrong)

A guy like me doesn't demand much , just loyalty, honesty, transparency and accountability, and sex here and there, I detest promiscuous women, hungry women turns me off , I can detect bad women from 1000 miles away now , and I hate lousy women

My women is cultured, conservative, always cooks ,clean and not broke, hardly go anywhere, I have full access to her phone and works for me now, that's why I eventually marry her

Of course she is not perfect, and I'm obviously not in love, and I do most of anything I like most of the time because she can't influence me , but like I said it's not for everyone and I'll advise you never to try marriage if you're not cut out for it


Always remember redpil is golden and it will save your life, save you lot of headache, time money and regret

Shoutout to guys like Martinez and great ubunja

I have ubunja miseducation saved in my drive for my son , with the red truth as well

Shoutout to (dipscicology) as well, I'm not so sure about the moniker name anymore

Shoutout to everyone of you preaching redpil

And to the new people here , embrace redpil, you will always need it for the rest of your life because women nature will never change

Women shouldn't be one of your problem in life , just focus on your life , you're all that's important, a women who wants you will always be with you,no matter your situation and don't ever made the mistake of falling in love , because women are never in love but in business, most of them are just trying to survive, don't become a ladder they will use to climb up



How can I like this twice

Words of wisdom

JESHAL007:
@ emmaodet, saw your diary on that married woman cheating on her husband, Jesus, sir, will you advice one to marry like these, let's remember these our generation women are not like the 90's and early 2000's women, even these so-called women are promiscuous, tiktok women are going to skyrocket cheating and divorce, it's sad, i would always say these if you didn't meet your wife as a virgin and she's used to sex before she married you, that spirit of fvcking can't leave her it will enter marriage

A thing is: it's said that women's sexual urge increases into their forties and for some women, bearing children even activates or further ignites the urge. Expect for cultural barriers, I'm of the belief that men should focus more on their financial pursuits rather than what goes into women's vaginas. There's DNA testing, once the genes of the children are validated, I am good.

We're in an age where attraction can be easily found and activities hidden. So why stress myself? It's not like women in the '90s didn't do these things, there just weren't cameras.

It's my belief tho. Every mallam to his kettle.

Cold Approaching or Genuine Desire


The moment you approached a woman, she automatically becomes the PRIZE. There's no second thought about this.

How you decide to play the game and turn the table to make you the man become the prize is a tedious work of seduction that should either be saved or channelled to a woman that first like you.

The thing is that women have a particular men they love. This is aside financial and physical status. Meet any mature woman today, and she will tell you she loves this particular man. She will not wait for that man to approach her, rather she will get closer to the man and send greenlights. Another man chasing this kind of woman is mere wasting his time.

The humiliation ritual you'll face when cold approaching and the later rejection affects you psychologically no matter how much you all try to form Brocks Lesnar. "Oh, her lose, not mine". Bro shut the Bleep up! It is actually your lose because you were the one that approached her, she never cared about your existence not until you decide to jump into her radar.

This is where manipulative women are able to play their script, because they know that it's the man doing the chasing and as a hunter he will try all means to get her down to satiate his ego and increase his notch counts, and in this same process, alter these men into simps.

Not entirely disproving cold approaching women. But the ROI is extremely low and poor. Your only advantage is if you've good aesthetics in looks and good financial standing. You must be constantly showcasing your status to draw women's attention and as well understand how seduction works. And in most cases you end up being a simp. Because you're trying to force a relationship to happen where there should be none in the first place.

This doesn't means you can't seduce a stranger into your bed, but that's possible if you're doing it on a mutual ground, that's after creating some form of rapport rather than just jumping into her front and starts giving lines. She will definitely see you as a 🤡.

Fun fact: every man also has one or two women vying for their attention. The problem is that men don't know how to pick signals from women and/or these women making sexual advances are not sexually appealing to the men.

It's a dilemma: the woman you lust over don't love you; the woman who loves you, you don't lust over.

The thing here is that, in the intersexual dynamics, the relationship moves easier when it's the woman that likes you first. She'll do everything to make the relationship work. That's what is termed Genuine desire.
Reverse cannot be the case because women want to give reverence and adulation for their men and end up being protected by these men.

Stop shooting aimlessly.

Look for the few women that have genuine desire for you and you'll enjoy the game of seduction and the interplay of love and romance.

CaveAdullam:
Cold Approaching or Genuine Desire


The moment you approached a woman, she automatically becomes the PRIZE. There's no second thought about this.

How you decide to play the game and turn the table to make you the man become the prize is a tedious work of seduction that should either be saved or channelled to a woman that first like you.

The thing is that women have a particular men they love. This is aside financial and physical status. Meet any mature woman today, and she will tell you she loves this particular man. She will not wait for that man to approach her, rather she will get closer to the man and send greenlights. Another man chasing this kind of woman is mere wasting his time.

The humiliation ritual you'll face when cold approaching and the later rejection affects you psychologically no matter how much you all try to form Brocks Lesnar. "Oh, her lose, not mine". Bro shut the Bleep up! It is actually your lose because you were the one that approached her, she never cared about your existence not until you decide to jump into her radar.

This is where manipulative women are able to play their script, because they know that it's the man doing the chasing and as a hunter he will try all means to get her down to satiate his ego and increase his notch counts, and in this same process, alter these men into simps.

Not entirely disproving cold approaching women. But the ROI is extremely low and poor. Your only advantage is if you've good aesthetics in looks and good financial standing. You must be constantly showcasing your status to draw women's attention and as well understand how seduction works. And in most cases you end up being a simp. Because you're trying to force a relationship to happen where there should be none in the first place.

This doesn't means you can't seduce a stranger into your bed, but that's possible if you're doing it on a mutual ground, that's after creating some form of rapport rather than just jumping into her front and starts giving lines. She will definitely see you as a 🤡.

Fun fact: every man also has one or two women vying for their attention. The problem is that men don't know how to pick signals from women and/or these women making sexual advances are not sexually appealing to the men.

It's a dilemma: the woman you lust over don't love you; the woman who loves you, you don't lust over.

The thing here is that, in the intersexual dynamics, the relationship moves easier when it's the woman that likes you first. She'll do everything to make the relationship work. That's what is termed Genuine desire.
Reverse cannot be the case because women want to give reverence and adulation for their men and end up being protected by these men.

Stop shooting aimlessly.

Look for the few women that have genuine desire for you and you'll enjoy the game of seduction and the interplay of love and romance.

You mentioned that every man has one or two women vying for his attention, and that the problem is men don’t recognize the signals.

If that’s true, it actually strengthens the case for cold approach.

Because if a man cannot recognize signals, cannot act on them, and cannot build attraction even when interest exists, then telling him to “wait for genuine desire” doesn’t solve his problem because he has a "skills issue".

And that’s where cold approach becomes useful. Not because it’s the best way to get women, but because it forces a man to develop the awareness, confidence, and social calibration needed to even recognize and respond to those signals in the first place.

Without these skills, it doesn't even matter if “women who like him” exist, because he cannot convert that interest into anything real.

You say the woman becomes the prize the moment you approach. I disagree. She only becomes the prize if the man is operating from scarcity. If he has an abundance mindset, cold approaching is like a playing ground for him to have fun and amuse himself.

Also, rejection is not inherently psychologically damaging. It becomes damaging only when a man is attached to outcomes he cannot control. Otherwise, it’s just useful feedback that he can use to develop himself. The same way going to the gym exposes your weakness before it helps you builds up strength.

For example, before I started cold approaching, I used to think looks didn't matter much to women. I now realise they matter more than I had initially thought. They can overlook looks but that comes with a lot of stress and shit test that I believe isn't worth it.

That realization pushed me to invest more in myself. So when I see claims that women value men who invest in themselves more than men who spend money on them, I nod in agreement drawing from my personal experience.

I also learnt that physical touch is a powerful tool in seduction, along with many other nuances that are difficult to fully explain in this post.

The idea that men should avoid cold approach because of low ROI ignores something important, cold approach is low ROI for results, but high ROI for skills and skills is what creates results.

You don’t learn confidence, social awareness, or emotional control by waiting for women to choose you. You develop those traits by putting yourself in situations where they are needed.

I agree that genuine desire from a woman makes everything easier. But the reason cold approach is less effective is not because it doesn’t work, it’s because it often encourages men to be direct too early. And it’s difficult to make someone feel something for you just because you openly express interest. That usually only works if you’re already highly attractive or high status.

But in terms of developing the required skills that can attract them consistently, very few things come close to cold approach.

At some point, yes, a man should rely more on selecting women who show interest. But skipping the phase where he builds the necessary skills is like expecting results without training.

I don’t see cold approach and genuine desire as opposites. A man should use both. Cold approach is a training tool.

Approach with intention until you no longer need to approach.

That’s when genuine desire actually starts working in your favor.

ElasmoBranchii:
You mentioned that every man has one or two women vying for his attention, and that the problem is men don’t recognize the signals.

If that’s true, it actually strengthens the case for cold approach.

Because if a man cannot recognize signals, cannot act on them, and cannot build attraction even when interest exists, then telling him to “wait for genuine desire” doesn’t solve his problem because he has a "skills issue".

And that’s where cold approach becomes useful. Not because it’s the best way to get women, but because it forces a man to develop the awareness, confidence, and social calibration needed to even recognize and respond to those signals in the first place.

Without these skills, it doesn't even matter if “women who like him” exist, because he cannot convert that interest into anything real.

You say the woman becomes the prize the moment you approach. I disagree. She only becomes the prize if the man is operating from scarcity. If he has an abundance mindset, cold approaching is like a playing ground for him to have fun and amuse himself.

Also, rejection is not inherently psychologically damaging. It becomes damaging only when a man is attached to outcomes he cannot control. Otherwise, it’s just useful feedback that he can use to develop himself. The same way going to the gym exposes your weakness before it helps you builds up strength.

For example, before I started cold approaching, I used to think looks didn't matter much to women. I now realise they matter more than I had initially thought. They can overlook looks but that comes with a lot of stress and shit test that I believe isn't worth it.

That realization pushed me to invest more in myself. So when I see claims that women value men who invest in themselves more than men who spend money on them, I nod in agreement drawing from my personal experience.

I also learnt that physical touch is a powerful tool in seduction, along with many other nuances that are difficult to fully explain in this post.

The idea that men should avoid cold approach because of low ROI ignores something important, cold approach is low ROI for results, but high ROI for skills and skills is what creates results.

You don’t learn confidence, social awareness, or emotional control by waiting for women to choose you. You develop those traits by putting yourself in situations where they are needed.

I agree that genuine desire from a woman makes everything easier. But the reason cold approach is less effective is not because it doesn’t work, it’s because it often encourages men to be direct too early. And it’s difficult to make someone feel something for you just because you openly express interest. That usually only works if you’re already highly attractive or high status.

But in terms of developing the required skills that can attract them consistently, very few things come close to cold approach.

At some point, yes, a man should rely more on selecting women who show interest. But skipping the phase where he builds the necessary skills is like expecting results without training.

I don’t see cold approach and genuine desire as opposites. A man should use both. Cold approach is a training tool.

Approach with intention until you no longer need to approach.

That’s when genuine desire actually starts working in your favor.

1. We've had this discourse several times in the past over the years. So, no need trying to awaken it; only as form of remembrance.

2. When we are talking about cold approaching, it's not about you. We are talking about the average Joe - their predispositions and results. What happens on average is what's relevant here, not what happens with one or two pickup artists.

Your position is right. There's trueness in what you've stated. However, the problem is that you haven't considered what happens at scale when billions of men are being considered.

3. I have been at both sides of the fence and I can speak confidently about both positions. Nothing compares to Genuine Desire.

Money is important. Looks is vital. Status is relevant. But genuine desire don't give a Bleep about these things when it wants the man she wants. These other things becomes an icing on the cake when she has completely devoted herself to you.

4. You need to see a godly woman in the truest sense, breaking her rules and principles and adjusting herself to fit you. This is a card she can't play very well when you've cold approached prior.

And when it comes to cold approaching women, you care about your notch counts than actually seducing her and owning her soul. While she cares more about you pleasing her than actually devoting herself to you.

5. I'm not interested in hundreds and thousands of women. Not king Solomon. Neither do I have the time or life span to waste my years and time cold approaching hundreds of women because I'm trying to build a skill. I'm concerned about those few women who will completely devote their souls to me, not out of persuasion but out of a desire to stay attached to me.

Meanwhile, it's not cold approaching that helps you build whatever relevant skill that makes you a man, be it sexual or nonsexual skill.

6. Won't lie at all - the biggest advantage of cold approaching is meeting lots of women and giving you the opportunity to increase your notch counts. Biologically speaking, this is a relevant skill as more women means more of your genes in the genetic pool.

7. Cold approaching or Genuine desire, a man still needs to put himself outside. Then, leverage his particular kind of sexual or seductive game.

However, there's a difference between a beautiful flower that attracts insects and a lion that chases a deer.

The ultimate sexual win is Devotion and not notch counts. As well as quality offsprings.

Thanks.

A time will come when you realise that women can never cure your loneliness.

CaveAdullam:
1. We've had this discourse several times in the past over the years. So, no need trying to awaken it; only as form of remembrance.

2. When we are talking about cold approaching, it's not about you. We are talking about the average Joe - their predispositions and results. What happens on average is what's relevant here, not what happens with one or two pickup artists.

Your position is right. There's trueness in what you've stated. However, the problem is that you haven't considered what happens at scale when billions of men are being considered.

3. I have been at both sides of the fence and I can speak confidently about both positions. Nothing compares to Genuine Desire.

Money is important. Looks is vital. Status is relevant. But genuine desire don't give a Bleep about these things when it wants the man she wants. These other things becomes an icing on the cake when she has completely devoted herself to you.

4. You need to see a godly woman in the truest sense, breaking her rules and principles and adjusting herself to fit you. This is a card she can't play very well when you've cold approached prior.

And when it comes to cold approaching women, you care about your notch counts than actually seducing her and owning her soul. While she cares more about you pleasing her than actually devoting herself to you.

5. I'm not interested in hundreds and thousands of women. Not king Solomon. Neither do I have the time or life span to waste my years and time cold approaching hundreds of women because I'm trying to build a skill. I'm concerned about those few women who will completely devote their souls to me, not out of persuasion but out of a desire to stay attached to me.

Meanwhile, it's not cold approaching that helps you build whatever relevant skill that makes you a man, be it sexual or nonsexual skill.

6. Won't lie at all - the biggest advantage of cold approaching is meeting lots of women and giving you the opportunity to increase your notch counts. Biologically speaking, this is a relevant skill as more women means more of your genes in the genetic pool.

7. Cold approaching or Genuine desire, a man still needs to put himself outside. Then, leverage his particular kind of sexual or seductive game.

However, there's a difference between a beautiful flower that attracts insects and a lion that chases a deer.

The ultimate sexual win is Devotion and not notch counts. As well as quality offsprings.

Thanks.

Gbam ! More like capital preservation- when she’s the one chasing.

CaveAdullam:
1. We've had this discourse several times in the past over the years. So, no need trying to awaken it; only as form of remembrance.

2. When we are talking about cold approaching, it's not about you. We are talking about the average Joe - their predispositions and results. What happens on average is what's relevant here, not what happens with one or two pickup artists.

Your position is right. There's trueness in what you've stated. However, the problem is that you haven't considered what happens at scale when billions of men are being considered.

3. I have been at both sides of the fence and I can speak confidently about both positions. Nothing compares to Genuine Desire.

Money is important. Looks is vital. Status is relevant. But genuine desire don't give a Bleep about these things when it wants the man she wants. These other things becomes an icing on the cake when she has completely devoted herself to you.

4. You need to see a godly woman in the truest sense, breaking her rules and principles and adjusting herself to fit you. This is a card she can't play very well when you've cold approached prior.

And when it comes to cold approaching women, you care about your notch counts than actually seducing her and owning her soul. While she cares more about you pleasing her than actually devoting herself to you.

5. I'm not interested in hundreds and thousands of women. Not king Solomon. Neither do I have the time or life span to waste my years and time cold approaching hundreds of women because I'm trying to build a skill. I'm concerned about those few women who will completely devote their souls to me, not out of persuasion but out of a desire to stay attached to me.

Meanwhile, it's not cold approaching that helps you build whatever relevant skill that makes you a man, be it sexual or nonsexual skill.

6. Won't lie at all - the biggest advantage of cold approaching is meeting lots of women and giving you the opportunity to increase your notch counts. Biologically speaking, this is a relevant skill as more women means more of your genes in the genetic pool.

7. Cold approaching or Genuine desire, a man still needs to put himself outside. Then, leverage his particular kind of sexual or seductive game.

However, there's a difference between a beautiful flower that attracts insects and a lion that chases a deer.

The ultimate sexual win is Devotion and not notch counts. As well as quality offsprings.

Thanks.

I wanted to write some notes about this — a cumulative experience looking back on my days in primary school, secondary school, university, and office life — but I got tired and bored, so I deleted the whole message.

In the past, I struggled a lot with getting ladies… LOL.

If looks were all that mattered to get a woman laid, I would probably die as a virgin. When it comes to looks, I’m probably a 1.5/10.

Yet I’ve ended up shagging ladies — not one, two or three; I’ve lost count — who didn’t even want to talk to me when I first approached them. It was as clear as daylight that they didn’t want me by their side at all. Regardless, I persisted, got their contact, and many weeks later they were the ones chasing and tailing me around and frustrating my life with monitoring disguised as being caring.

There are a lot of reasons ladies sleep with men. The same woman can sleep with one man because he looks handsome and she loves rolling around with him, with another for money, and with yet another because he’s very wild and fun to be around, etc. I have none of the things I just mentioned.

It’s too early to say a woman is not attracted to you from the very first moment you meet her. With ladies, attraction cannot be narrowed down to one specific thing.

Attraction is not Natural. Yes! It can be engineered. Women are consciously or unconsciously moved by a specific thing and probably at a specific period of time (there is something you are doing, you might not know it that makes that woman attracted to you). When you are having a great time with a woman, maximize those moments.

I think Ubunja says something like this in one of his articles: a man sees 4, but women see 2 + 2. So she can be dating five men and getting different things from all of them — what one lacks, another provides.

Nature has been designed in such a way that reproduction must go on. Attraction is not a choice. A woman will be attracted to so many things, tangible or intangible. It is in her best interest to have clarity, self-control, and restraint. If not, she will get ruined while nature is just doing its thing.

So my babe I talked about a few weeks ago came over this weekend. I was saying the last time she came we couldn't make out because she was on her period and she wanted to be sure of my commitment before she has sex with me. She didn't actually say that, it was what I assumed and deduce from all the questions I ask but I found out I couldn't be more wrong. Because we talked again after making out this time and she said it that she's literally scared of sex because she finds it painful and doesn't enjoy sex at all. I wanted to know why she now came and still made out with with. She said it was because I've helped her so much and she knew I was angry with her the last time because we didn't do the deed, which I explained to her that I wasn't angry because she didn't give me sex but was angry because I felt she didn't want us making out because of the guy in Edo that it made me felt she still emotionally attached to the guy, but if she had told me she was scared of sex I would have understood. I had to compromise by doing only 2 times since she told me she crossed her mind to give me once and I had 3 times in mind so we both settled for 2 which I realized was very hard for her. She literally shed tears. The only thing that put me off and which I told her was her coming to me because she feels she owes me and I wanted her to come because she loves me. Which she later said if she doesn't love me, she would not be traveling from Sango to Bariga considering the work and little time she had to rest. But I still find it unbelievable because even though I knew about her trauma of being raped, I felt she shouldn't find sex painful physically since we did it twice years before she now left to Edo. Though I told her sex is a deal breaker for me in a marriage because she said she can only try her best to have sex twice in a month and at most once in a week. And me we must constantly be doing it at least 3-4 times weekly. Now I'm thinking if therapy could be of any help to her because I don't think sex could be painful like that and the pain is only in her head due to the forced sex she had as her first sex. Because she told me then that she couldn't even report to her mum then, and that aside from the physical pain she came emotionally down for weeks because the guy was someone they trusted and she's putting the blame on herself.

Wotowotoman:
Ogbeni, I sure say you get book or service wey you dey try sell. All these epistles wey you dey write to hype yourself just to show Jew men say you be expert on women matters. E no go surprise me say serious konji don show guy man pepper. Soapy tinz

The guy is right though. What's with the heavy backlash?😂

Kipaji:
A man's life begins when he is born. Not at 30, not at 40.

Whatever age you are, live life and enjoy it. Enjoy the highs and the lows, the calm and the tumult, the hope and the despair. Being invisible at 20, doesn't mean that your life hasn't started yet. The start of your life is not determined by when women give you attention.
Whether you are 21 or 42 don't postpone happiness to tomorrow. Live now. Not at 30, not at 40, not at 50. Now.

My Oga At the top - Tensazangetsu20 gave me the same answer when I asked: When we go enjoy this money?

His answer? Now

And you both are correct because the enjoyment and trials at the age of 20 or 30 differs when they are performed/experienced at the age of 50 or 60. So enjoy it now.

CaveAdullam:
Cold Approaching or Genuine Desire


The moment you approached a woman, she automatically becomes the PRIZE. There's no second thought about this.

How you decide to play the game and turn the table to make you the man become the prize is a tedious work of seduction that should either be saved or channelled to a woman that first like you.

The thing is that women have a particular men they love. This is aside financial and physical status. Meet any mature woman today, and she will tell you she loves this particular man. She will not wait for that man to approach her, rather she will get closer to the man and send greenlights. Another man chasing this kind of woman is mere wasting his time.

The humiliation ritual you'll face when cold approaching and the later rejection affects you psychologically no matter how much you all try to form Brocks Lesnar. "Oh, her lose, not mine". Bro shut the Bleep up! It is actually your lose because you were the one that approached her, she never cared about your existence not until you decide to jump into her radar.

This is where manipulative women are able to play their script, because they know that it's the man doing the chasing and as a hunter he will try all means to get her down to satiate his ego and increase his notch counts, and in this same process, alter these men into simps.

Not entirely disproving cold approaching women. But the ROI is extremely low and poor. Your only advantage is if you've good aesthetics in looks and good financial standing. You must be constantly showcasing your status to draw women's attention and as well understand how seduction works. And in most cases you end up being a simp. Because you're trying to force a relationship to happen where there should be none in the first place.

This doesn't means you can't seduce a stranger into your bed, but that's possible if you're doing it on a mutual ground, that's after creating some form of rapport rather than just jumping into her front and starts giving lines. She will definitely see you as a 🤡.

Fun fact: every man also has one or two women vying for their attention. The problem is that men don't know how to pick signals from women and/or these women making sexual advances are not sexually appealing to the men.

It's a dilemma: the woman you lust over don't love you; the woman who loves you, you don't lust over.

The thing here is that, in the intersexual dynamics, the relationship moves easier when it's the woman that likes you first. She'll do everything to make the relationship work. That's what is termed Genuine desire.
Reverse cannot be the case because women want to give reverence and adulation for their men and end up being protected by these men.

Stop shooting aimlessly.

Look for the few women that have genuine desire for you and you'll enjoy the game of seduction and the interplay of love and romance.

Cold approach will always give women all the cards ,you can't demand her virginity status,you can't tell her your do's and don't , you will be walking on eggshells not to offend her.

Nothing beats genuine desire.

CaveAdullam:
Cold Approaching or Genuine Desire


The moment you approached a woman, she automatically becomes the PRIZE. There's no second thought about this.

How you decide to play the game and turn the table to make you the man become the prize is a tedious work of seduction that should either be saved or channelled to a woman that first like you.

The thing is that women have a particular men they love. This is aside financial and physical status. Meet any mature woman today, and she will tell you she loves this particular man. She will not wait for that man to approach her, rather she will get closer to the man and send greenlights. Another man chasing this kind of woman is mere wasting his time.

The humiliation ritual you'll face when cold approaching and the later rejection affects you psychologically no matter how much you all try to form Brocks Lesnar. "Oh, her lose, not mine". Bro shut the Bleep up! It is actually your lose because you were the one that approached her, she never cared about your existence not until you decide to jump into her radar.

This is where manipulative women are able to play their script, because they know that it's the man doing the chasing and as a hunter he will try all means to get her down to satiate his ego and increase his notch counts, and in this same process, alter these men into simps.

Not entirely disproving cold approaching women. But the ROI is extremely low and poor. Your only advantage is if you've good aesthetics in looks and good financial standing. You must be constantly showcasing your status to draw women's attention and as well understand how seduction works. And in most cases you end up being a simp. Because you're trying to force a relationship to happen where there should be none in the first place.

This doesn't means you can't seduce a stranger into your bed, but that's possible if you're doing it on a mutual ground, that's after creating some form of rapport rather than just jumping into her front and starts giving lines. She will definitely see you as a 🤡.

Fun fact: every man also has one or two women vying for their attention. The problem is that men don't know how to pick signals from women and/or these women making sexual advances are not sexually appealing to the men.

It's a dilemma: the woman you lust over don't love you; the woman who loves you, you don't lust over.

The thing here is that, in the intersexual dynamics, the relationship moves easier when it's the woman that likes you first. She'll do everything to make the relationship work. That's what is termed Genuine desire.
Reverse cannot be the case because women want to give reverence and adulation for their men and end up being protected by these men.

Stop shooting aimlessly.

Look for the few women that have genuine desire for you and you'll enjoy the game of seduction and the interplay of love and romance.

You’re fundamentally wrong when you say “the moment you approach a woman, she automatically becomes the prize.”

That statement sounds clever, but it’s complete rooted in fear, not reality.
I'll get back to that in a moment… Let’s start with the basics you conveniently ignored.

First, cold approach is when you initiate conversation with to a complete stranger.... a woman who has zero prior knowledge of you. Yes, that comes with higher rejection risk.

But here’s what you’re missing: most Naija guys don’t even do cold approach

Go outside for one full month. Walk through malls, markets, streets, campuses, ShopRite, anywhere women gather during the day. Count how many guys you see walking up to a random girl they don’t know. You’ll be shocked… it’s extremely rare.

Most Nigerian guys are waiting for “interest signals,” church connections, or the girl to make the first move. They lack the balls to approach a female stranger.

So when you complain that cold approach has low ROI, you’re mostly talking about a very tiny minority of men who actually have the courage to even try. The rest are just spectators making excuses.

Now, back to your main claim: “The moment you approach, she becomes the prize.”

Firstly…

Female psychology doesn’t work that way. Forget the “I don't need a man” crap they are putting out there. Most woman see the guys they're attracted too on a daily basis. The reason why most women don't wanna approach these guys first is not because they are the prize, but because women are scared of rejection and being viewed as cheap...

Single women actually dress up, do makeup, take pictures, and go out HOPING a man with balls will approach them and sweep them off their feet. They are low-key scanning the environment, secretly wishing for the guy who has the balls to break the script.


Secondly…

The real reason most guys would get poor ROI from cold approach is not because it's cold approach… it’s HOW they do it. They’d spam approaches trying to harvest something (a phone number, validation). That desperate energy is what kills attraction.

The correct mindset for cold approach is TESTING THE WATERS , not harvesting.

For example…On last Friday evening, I saw a fine light-skinned girl pricing yam from a Hausa seller. When I got closer to her, I said, “Thank God you’re handling the yam. Let me go buy eggs so we can make yam and egg sauce this evening.”

Two possible outcomes:

1. She gives attitude, dry face, or ignores the bait: she failed the test. I smile, walk away, and continue my day. No ego damage, no wasted time.

2. She smiles, laughs, or plays along: she passed. Now I know she’s open to interacting with a stranger. From there, I express real intent and flow naturally.

She passed.

Most of my actual girlfriends and sexual experiences came from this exact mindset: test the waters fast, invest only in those who pass, move on from those who don’t.

With that approach and mindset, she's not the prize... I just gave her opportunity to follow my lead or get lost.

One last thing…

Most women would rather Bleep (or date) guys OUTSIDE their social circle so they can keep their dignity and avoid sexual judgment from people who know them.

Social circle game often comes with gossip, reputation risk, and pre-existing baggage.

Cold approach gives her a clean, exciting, “nobody has to know me and have Bleep” experience.

JESHAL007:
To be clear, engaging with women in permanent living arrangement would involve some level of "simping" as you'll be expected to provide as a man to get sex, companionship and your bloodline passed on. Realistically, you can't always hold frame 100% of the time but at least, be smart enough to recover when you seem to be losing

The bolded is one of the saddest, most beta statements I’ve heard in a long time.

Providing in and of itself is not simping.

In a healthy, genuine relationship, provision flows both ways. Not just financially, but emotionally, sexually, and energetically.

In relationship, A woman who genuinely wants you doesn’t just receive… she GIVES.. She disturbs you for sex. She spends on you too. She protects the relationship like it’s hers too. Because it is.

If the only reason she opens her legs or gives you affection is because you paid the bills, you’re not in a relationship.
You’re in a long-term business deal with worse customer service.

Let’s look at my big brother (cousin) as a real example…

When he started dating his now-wife, she wasn’t sitting back waiting for him to “provide” like some queen on a throne.
She was all in from early days. Constant calls, constant texts, random gifts, checking up on him.

When he lost big on a business deal and went into debt, he borrowed from me. When she found out, she got genuinely angry… not at him for failing at the business, but for not asking her for money first.

Her exact words: “Why are we in a relationship if you can’t ask me for money?”

She told him to return my money immediately and gave him hers instead.

That’s not “I’ll help you because I’m nice.”

That’s raw desire in action… a woman who sees her man struggling and feels compelled to step up because she actually wants him to win.

Online fellas would say, “A woman doesn't care about your struggle”

That's true only if she doesn't truly likes you. If she genuinely likes you, she will care. I'm speaking from experience.

My big brother and his wife have been married four years now with two boys. They run a joint family account where both of them put in 60% of their salaries every month for the house, the kids, and the relationship. Real partnership. Real provision from both sides.

After four years, she’s still the one disturbing him for sex. That's because she has raw, consistent desire for him. Not obligation.

That’s what happens when a woman genuinely wants you. She doesn’t make you earn sex like it’s a performance bonus. She gives it because she wants to. She protects the relationship because she wants to.


If you’re in a situation where you have to “provide to get sex and companionship,” you didn’t build a relationship. You built a transaction. And transactions always leave one party feeling used eventually.

Pukkalolo:
You’re fundamentally wrong when you say “the moment you approach a woman, she automatically becomes the prize.”

That statement sounds clever, but it’s complete rooted in fear, not reality.
I'll get back to that in a moment… Let’s start with the basics you conveniently ignored.

First, cold approach is when you initiate conversation with to a complete stranger.... a woman who has zero prior knowledge of you. Yes, that comes with higher rejection risk.

But here’s what you’re missing: most Naija guys don’t even do cold approach

Go outside for one full month. Walk through malls, markets, streets, campuses, ShopRite, anywhere women gather during the day. Count how many guys you see walking up to a random girl they don’t know. You’ll be shocked… it’s extremely rare.

Most Nigerian guys are waiting for “interest signals,” church connections, or the girl to make the first move. They lack the balls to approach a female stranger.

So when you complain that cold approach has low ROI, you’re mostly talking about a very tiny minority of men who actually have the courage to even try. The rest are just spectators making excuses.

Now, back to your main claim: “The moment you approach, she becomes the prize.”

Firstly…

Female psychology doesn’t work that way. Forget the “I don't need a man” crap they are putting out there. Most woman see the guys they're attracted too on a daily basis. The reason why most women don't wanna approach these guys first is not because they are the prize, but because women are scared of rejection and being viewed as cheap...

Single women actually dress up, do makeup, take pictures, and go out HOPING a man with balls will approach them and sweep them off their feet. They are low-key scanning the environment, secretly wishing for the guy who has the balls to break the script.


Secondly…

The real reason most guys would get poor ROI from cold approach is not because it's cold approach… it’s HOW they do it. They’d spam approaches trying to harvest something (a phone number, validation). That desperate energy is what kills attraction.

The correct mindset for cold approach is TESTING THE WATERS , not harvesting.

For example…On last Friday evening, I saw a fine light-skinned girl pricing yam from a Hausa seller. When I got closer to her, I said, “Thank God you’re handling the yam. Let me go buy eggs so we can make yam and egg sauce this evening.”

Two possible outcomes:

1. She gives attitude, dry face, or ignores the bait: she failed the test. I smile, walk away, and continue my day. No ego damage, no wasted time.

2. She smiles, laughs, or plays along: she passed. Now I know she’s open to interacting with a stranger. From there, I express real intent and flow naturally.

She passed.

Most of my actual girlfriends and sexual experiences came from this exact mindset: test the waters fast, invest only in those who pass, move on from those who don’t.

With that approach and mindset, she's not the prize... I just gave her opportunity to follow my lead or get lost.

One last thing…

Most women would rather Bleep (or date) guys OUTSIDE their social circle so they can keep their dignity and avoid sexual judgment from people who know them.

Social circle game often comes with gossip, reputation risk, and pre-existing baggage.

Cold approach gives her a clean, exciting, “nobody has to know me and have Bleep” experience.

Some guys think that cold approach begins and ends at spamming many girls with "I like you".

But that just leads to a lot of shit test if she isn't attracted to you. If you persist for long enough you might later get the girl but for me that's just too much work. I'm here to have fun not to stress myself trying to win you over.

To consistently crack different girls using cold approach it requires you to get really good at game.

Getting good at game requires some trial and error and experimenting with different styles and methods to see what works best for you. That's why I always say don't be afraid to fail an approach. You will learn from it.

You can't even use another guy's method to get results because his identity and everything about his existence is quite different from yours but you can learn something from his style of approach, if you really try to understand why his approach works but there are somethings that work in general.

Cold approach is like a playing field for you to experiment many ideas in game and redpill. You will see a lot of things that the redpill has told you about and laugh.

You can't even get far with cold approach without developing this "Testing the waters approach" mindest. You need to have fun with it.

That's why in the past I posted something about playful banter. You shift your mindset from trying to score the girl for a minute to having fun in an interaction with a human. Amusing yourself by seeing how good you can whine someone.

If you see that girl is having fun too then you start escalating. (Although you should have started escalating slowly from the start)

But I get it, this might not be exciting to some guys. To each his own. Use

Glad to see men still sharing pills on here!!!


Respect!!!😉😉👍👍👍