₦airaland Forum

Good day my Nairaland fam.

Please,matured minds in the house,is it a good thing for a man to help his ex girlfriend who's now married, financially. She used to be someone whom I loved so dearly in the past but unfortunately,she broke up with me immediately she met someone who was already asking her hand in marriage. It's been over 3 years since she got married and I made sure I cut every bit of communication between us. Out of the blue,I don't know who gave her my number. She called me,and apologized for what she did to me. Even before she could ask for my help,I already knew her husband wasn't financially buoyant like I thought. She said she wants to open a provision store ,cuz immediately after they got married,they relocated to Lagos. And she asked for my assistance.

So,I don't know if it's appropriate at all to help her, considering how she left me emotionally stranded when I needed her the most in my life. Tho I've completely moved on with my life,but receiving a call from her brought back a whole lot of memories.

Please,my fellow Nairalanders, reason with me. Should I help her out?

You sound like someone who has LOST 2 things:

1. Your DIGNITY.
2. Your MIND.

The breakup was NOT amicable.
You did NOT go your separate ways because of irreconcilable differences.

She DUMPED you the moment she met ANOTHER man who was ready to marry her.
She DUMPED you without a second a thought.

She DUMPED you for ANOTHER man.

And for THREE years, she did NOT reach out to you.
But the moment she needs MONEY, she remembered the MOOOGOOO that used to FAWN over her.

This woman wants money from YOU that the man she LEFT you for CANNOT provide.

And instead of REVELING in the KARMIC nature of the situation, you are here MULLING the idea of actually GIVING her the money.

Absolute MADNESS!

[quote author=Namaster post=139130842]You sound like someone who has LOST 2 things:

1. Your DIGNITY.
2. Your MIND.

The breakup was NOT amicable.
You did NOT go your separate ways because of irreconcilable differences.

She DUMPED you the moment she met ANOTHER man who was ready to marry her.
She DUMPED you without a second a thought.

She DUMPED you for ANOTHER man.

And for THREE years, she did NOT reach out to you.
But the moment she needs MONEY, she remembered the MOOOGOOO that used to FAWN over her.

This woman wants money from YOU that the man she LEFT you for CANNOT provide.

And instead of REVELING in the KARMIC nature of the situation, you are here MULLING the idea of actually GIVING her the money.

Absolute MADNESS!

[You dey stress dey reply d guy, u got time oo...ashawo dey him eye, e get wetin im dey find, na y]

I don't see anything wrong in helping her if it's within your capacity(No strings attached).

Since you don't wanna think critically, I won't waste my time to give you long answer...


Just say NO....


Thanks for your attention to the matter....

When foolish men fall in love, can't you open it for your wife or for yourself. Little wonder she dumped you. Any girl who leaves me na envy, jealousness and show off I dey take kill dem patapata.

Imagine me adding my ex back on sm. I will never chat her, I just want to keep her under my control and let her see other girls are having me. If na me dey provide financially before na you go come provide for me now?

Toolegit123:
Good day my Nairaland fam.


Nlfpmod obembet Dominique mynd44 Seun Dominique

No it is not appropriate. Send her to her husband. Her husband should be the one to give her money

The truth is the asking won't stop. Do one time helping and move on

Namaster:
You sound like someone who has LOST 2 things:

1. Your DIGNITY.
2. Your MIND.

The breakup was NOT amicable.
You did NOT go your separate ways because of irreconcilable differences.

She DUMPED you the moment she met ANOTHER man who was ready to marry her.
She DUMPED you without a second a thought.

She DUMPED you for ANOTHER man.

And for THREE years, she did NOT reach out to you.
But the moment she needs MONEY, she remembered the MOOOGOOO that used to FAWN over her.

This woman wants money from YOU that the man she LEFT you for CANNOT provide.

And instead of REVELING in the KARMIC nature of the situation, you are here MULLING the idea of actually GIVING her the money.

Absolute MADNESS!

Bro forget it, All what you listed shouldn't be the excuse for not helping if you are in the best position to help.

Bad ex, bad friends, as long as whatever they did to you in the past did not kill you but make you stronger. For them to come for help, prove to them you are better but it should be one time

Another episode on THINGS THAT NEVER HAPPENED. Rubbish.

First ask yourself; if you were married, would you like it if your wife went behind your back to ask her ex for help?

Your answer to that should guide your decision.
That's betrayal, short and simple.

By the way, your ex is alatenuje.

It depends on how much you have used her.

If you have really chopped her work.

You have to help her.

You are an investor.

Investor Sabinus.

Tell her you'll ask yourself girlfriend/wife for advice. That gender think they can't easily get things done/find their way 🤷🏿.

Help her and close contact with her. Ghost her.

But if you don't want to help her, don't ask us and don't bother about it. You think you are a better person because she came to you for help and her husband is broke? Na yesterday you see, today you know but tomorrow you never know so if your mind feels like helping, send what she needs and close the case. If your mind does not feel like it, don't help her and close the case. You could have been dead and she would have found someone else. Your experience is simply a test of character. Your character will be tested and has to be consistent whether you have something to gain or not. That is the lesson here for you. Who are you? Money will teach you lessons after you spend it

My reply alone when she first called she go hate me that day. She leave you because she felt like you don’t have value!!😂😂😂. Wetin she come do!!! You see woman are very ruthless with thier decision. As a man be ruthless with your decision too.. 😂😂😂!!

You nailed it

Namaster:
You sound like someone who has LOST 2 things:

1. Your DIGNITY.
2. Your MIND.

The breakup was NOT amicable.
You did NOT go your separate ways because of irreconcilable differences.

She DUMPED you the moment she met ANOTHER man who was ready to marry her.
She DUMPED you without a second a thought.

She DUMPED you for ANOTHER man.

And for THREE years, she did NOT reach out to you.
But the moment she needs MONEY, she remembered the MOOOGOOO that used to FAWN over her.

This woman wants money from YOU that the man she LEFT you for CANNOT provide.

And instead of REVELING in the KARMIC nature of the situation, you are here MULLING the idea of actually GIVING her the money.

Absolute MADNESS!

It depends on your standard at moment.

If you are financially sustainable,you can go ahead to assist her.

Paying evils with evil elongated to a disastrous moment.

Thank God you are blessed now,what if she was in your life but you are being poor.

If you cannot forgo the past,you are putting yourself in boundage.

If you have what you can give away go ahead bros.

God will bless you abundantly.

You will be richer and richer.

God had forgiven us countless times.

If she was good to you when you are together, please help her.

Leaving you might not be fully her fault since you are not ready at that moment and later had limited time to wait for a suitors.

I think you know better than us.

[quote author=Toolegit123
Whether you help her or not depends on you.
If you don't want to help fine, if you decide to help fine as well.
However, if you want to help make sure you speak to the husband first. That will erase any sexual thoughts you might harbour.
If it's loan you want to give, it should be to/with the husband you sign any agreement...


post=139130729]Good day my Nairaland fam.

Please,matured minds in the house,is it a good thing for a man to help his ex girlfriend who's now married, financially. She used to be someone whom I loved so dearly in the past but unfortunately,she broke up with me immediately she met someone who was already asking her hand in marriage. It's been over 3 years since she got married and I made sure I cut every bit of communication between us. Out of the blue,I don't know who gave her my number. She called me,and apologized for what she did to me. Even before she could ask for my help,I already knew her husband wasn't financially buoyant like I thought. She said she wants to open a provision store ,cuz immediately after they got married,they relocated to Lagos. And she asked for my assistance.

So,I don't know if it's appropriate at all to help her, considering how she left me emotionally stranded when I needed her the most in my life. Tho I've completely moved on with my life,but receiving a call from her brought back a whole lot of memories.

Please,my fellow Nairalanders, reason with me. Should I help her out?

Nlfpmod obembet Dominique mynd44 Seun Dominique[/quote]

Toolegit123:
Good day my Nairaland fam.

Please,matured minds in the house,is it a good thing for a man to help his ex girlfriend who's now married, financially. She used to be someone whom I loved so dearly in the past but unfortunately,she broke up with me immediately she met someone who was already asking her hand in marriage. It's been over 3 years since she got married and I made sure I cut every bit of communication between us. Out of the blue,I don't know who gave her my number. She called me,and apologized for what she did to me. Even before she could ask for my help,I already knew her husband wasn't financially buoyant like I thought. She said she wants to open a provision store ,cuz immediately after they got married,they relocated to Lagos. And she asked for my assistance.

So,I don't know if it's appropriate at all to help her, considering how she left me emotionally stranded when I needed her the most in my life. Tho I've completely moved on with my life,but receiving a call from her brought back a whole lot of memories.

Please,my fellow Nairalanders, reason with me. Should I help her out?

Nlfpmod obembet Dominique mynd44 Seun Dominique

simp don't you have family members that need pocket money at school. Woman wen lossgard you finished you still dey mumu dey find excuses to spend and waste your money on her. Try dey knack her too because you case worse. Even wen u dey date her before she dump u. She dey knack outside steady because you be her pay client wen no Sabi knack her.

ridwintin89:
It depends on your standard at moment.

If you are financially sustainable,you can go ahead to assist her.

Paying evils with evil elongated to a disastrous moment.

Thank God you are blessed now,what if she was in your life but you are being poor.

If you cannot forgo the past,you are putting yourself in boundage.

If you have what you can give away go ahead bros.

God will bless you abundantly.

You will be richer and richer.

God had forgiven us countless times.

If she was good to you when you are together, please help her.

Leaving you might not be fully her fault since you are not ready at that moment and later had limited time to wait for a suitors.

I think you know better than us.

If you have the means, talk to your and let her know you want to assist your friend. Of course ensure you and the old friend are separated by a very long distance with no plan to meet in the near future.

Then help her and just leave it at that. No strings attached. If you could help your enemies and all who dealt with you when you were growing up, how much more a friend.

Most men won't have some unwanted issues if they carried their wives along. It makes most things open, transparent and reduce certain temptations.

Nothing goes for nothing
Invoke Okafor's law
Collect enough doggy style from her
Before you will help her

If you have the capacity and you don't have any immediate family member in dire need, you can assist with whatever you can afford. Afterwards, sever all communications with her. A lot of people are going through a lot in this economy. If you have the capacity to help anyone that's genuinely in need, don't hesitate to do so

Help am but use long spoon

It is appropriate but u will still regret it in the end

Judging from what you explained, that woman does not deserve any form of financial assistance. If her husband were financially buoyant she likely would not have remembered that you still exist.


Normally, people say it is wrong to repay evil with evil because it can come across as bitterness. However, I do not concern myself with others’ opinions. I believe in treating people the way they treat me ---that is my nature, and it has always given me peace of mind.


I also dislike religious blackmail ---statements like “Are you not a Christian?” should not be used to pressure or manipulate me .......Nor be me kîll Jesus.

There's a statement Delta people used to say in pidgin..."who don faint before no be stranger to death". She dumped because, according to you, she'd met someone that professed marriage to her. The same banny is coming back to ask for your help because she knows you're doing well financially. May be she also left you because you were broke. Now she wants your help to open a provision store for her(which I feel you wanna do right now). If na your sister ask you for this help you go gree do am for her? May be not.
If you know what is good for you, use that money and set up your sibling or mum and stop acting like someone who is being hypnotized. Don't be a SIMP for the second time!

Ask for a proof that her husband is aware

Send that money to your mom your sister or your wife. They need it more because it will not be well with you if you send it to your ex

Toolegit123:
Good day my Nairaland fam.

Please,matured minds in the house,is it a good thing for a man to help his ex girlfriend who's now married, financially. She used to be someone whom I loved so dearly in the past but unfortunately,she broke up with me immediately she met someone who was already asking her hand in marriage. It's been over 3 years since she got married and I made sure I cut every bit of communication between us. Out of the blue,I don't know who gave her my number. She called me,and apologized for what she did to me. Even before she could ask for my help,I already knew her husband wasn't financially buoyant like I thought. She said she wants to open a provision store ,cuz immediately after they got married,they relocated to Lagos. And she asked for my assistance.

So,I don't know if it's appropriate at all to help her, considering how she left me emotionally stranded when I needed her the most in my life. Tho I've completely moved on with my life,but receiving a call from her brought back a whole lot of memories.

Please,my fellow Nairalanders, reason with me. Should I help her out?

My dear brother, I will tell you the honest truth straight forwardly because you asked a sincere question.

Firstly, let me make you understand that the fact that she didn't marry you should not make you feel bitter about her.
For everyone, God had created someone for him/ her by reason of destiny. If you didn't marry her, she was not the person God destined for you. Both of your only crossed paths for a purpose.

Secondly, there is absolutely nothing wrong in helping your Ex if she is in need and reaches out to you OR you feel led to do so.
Life is meant to be such that we can help one another. Today you help her, tomorrow it might be she helping you or your children.
Besides, why would you deny her help if she is in need and a said you truly loved her? Are you still feeling hurt and want vengeance?
That is not needful. Render help to the needy and consider it that you are doing it for God and sowing a seed.
.
Would you deny someone in need of water a drink?
Would you prefer to make contribution for her burial (God forbid) than to give financial assistance while she is alive ?
Finally, my candid advise for you is reach out to her and give the help if you can

You people will never learn. Firstly, she is married and should be asking her husband for assistance and not you.

Secondly, she left you because she probably didn't consider you buoyant enough, and not necessarily because you weren't ready.

For courtesy sake, just explain to her that as a married woman, helping her without her husband's knowledge is not traditionally right.

Honestly, I think you dodged a bullet because women like her will not hesitate to sleep with an ex if the situation calls for it.

I just want to read if the ex na man or woman......
Man no dey help woman finish ooooo
Help her with a pure mind ooooooooo
No attach bedroom tactics join but
Not always, let her find her ground in her marriage, no dey always dey available oooo
Na trouble you dey find so....

Because if table turn lasan
You go shock
Wertin she go vomit give you.