₦airaland Forum

Kalulu44:
➜I never say the tool which is the police or law are the problem. It's the people affected by it that just feels helpless thinking it won't favor them if they try to fight back

Well, they need to overcome that sense of helplessness is what I am saying even now. No one out there is going to have to do the work for them. They need to want it for themselves. 😒

Meteng:
The husbands younger brother has been salivating after her even when the husband was alive. Period

This is not necessarily true

Meteng:
The husbands younger brother has been salivating after her even when the husband was alive. Period

Women don finish
Which kind salvation?
I don't think so.
Something sinister to this
Some cultures support such but she must not be compelled

Mariangeles:
So, she should start sharing herself around the family just to stay in the family, abi?

Would you say the same if she were your sister?

She will still go and share herself to outsiders abi, the very condition should be the brother in law marrying her.

Lovelink1991:
That is not true, the brother only demanded for her because of his 17 years childlessness.

But he can take a new wife naah

Orinechi:
Rejecting something you will still kneel to beg from a man. U don't know that is the only thing that will keep you in that family. Rubbish!

Hello

Will you say this if she were your daughter or sister?

Orinechi:
C Is only one family member who want her not the whole family members. What's wrong in accepting a dead husband brother's advance. At least the bloodline will continue. Tomorrow now she may Bleep a man who has thiefry or madness in his DNA and that will change everything in that family.

Are you okay?

Which stupid bloodline are you talking about?

Lovelink1991:
Person is telling you her own life experiences of how the late husband's brother is disturbing her

How u take knw say , she talk truth ?

She has right to either accept or reject it.
Nobody should force her into doing it. But it is better she accepts it instead of looking else where.
But I don't see anything wrong with it

That is the case for sure

Meteng:
The husbands younger brother has been salivating after her even when the husband was alive. Period

WHO KNOWS IF NA THE YOUNGER BROTHER KILL THE HUSBAND

In my own tradition, if the widow eventually accepted to birth a child for the late husband's brother, that child would belong to the late husband not the biological father (the brother).

What does Deuteronomy 25:5-10, says?.

"brothers live together and one dies without a son, the widow must not marry outside the family. The deceased man's brother is commanded to marry her, with the first son born from this union carrying on the dead brother's name to preserve his inheritance"

So, it's not traditional nor scriptural that your late brother's wife must birth you a child, but it can be done by agreement not by threat because she has already birthed children for her late husband, she owes the family nothing.

This sounds heavy, and I’m sorry you’re going through this while still grieving your husband. No one should be threatened or pressured like this, especially over something as personal as children.

*First, the legal and human reality:*
In Nigeria, a widow has full legal rights over her body and her decisions. There is no law that forces you to give up your late husband’s estate, property, or to bear children for his brother. The practice you’re describing is sometimes called “levirate” and while it still happens in some communities, it has no legal backing and goes against constitutional rights to dignity and personal liberty under Section 34 of the 1999 Constitution.

Threats and intimidation are also a criminal offense under the Violence Against Persons Prohibition Act 2015. That law specifically protects women from emotional, physical, and economic violence, including forced widowhood practices.

*What you can do right now:*

1. *Document everything* - Keep records of the threats: texts, calls, witnesses. If they come to your house, note the dates and what was said.
2. *Involve authorities* - Go to the nearest police station and report the threats. Ask for a formal statement. You can also reach out to the Ministry of Women Affairs in your state or the National Human Rights Commission. They have units that handle widow protection cases.
3. *Get community support* - If your community has a recognized traditional ruler or women’s leader who is fair-minded, speak to them privately. Sometimes elders can intervene before it escalates.
4. *Legal aid* - If you can’t afford a lawyer, reach out to FIDA Nigeria (International Federation of Women Lawyers) or Legal Aid Council of Nigeria. They offer free legal support to women facing this kind of pressure.
5. *Personal safety* - If you feel unsafe, stay with trusted family or friends for now and limit contact with them until there’s mediation.

*On the cultural pressure:* I understand the 17 years of childlessness is painful for them, but grief and tradition don’t override your right to safety and autonomy. You’re not obligated to solve their pain at the expense of your own wellbeing.

You don’t have to face this alone. There are organizations that deal with this exact issue and will protect your identity if you’re worried about stigma.

Heading says younger brother but video is saying elder brother...goodluck to you all for confusing yourselves.

Lovelink1991:
Person is telling you her own life experiences of how the late husband's brother is disturbing her

which one dem never talk before only to realize say na content dem dey do....

My best advice to the men is to put your house in order and make plans because you cannot say the day you will die.

May God help us, we have seen cases where a man puts his house in order and the wife/children send him to an early grave for his efforts.

So these things are neither here no there. But as a woman too, try your best to have at least property and some wealth or money of your own, so that you can call bluff of people. For women that are 100% dependent on their husbands wealth, it is risky.

clockwisereport:
Are you okay?

Which stupid bloodline are you talking about?

No! You are the one who is okay. Am talking about her bloodline and that of her lovely husband's family. You can't be married into a particular family and because your husband had died, that becomes a pass to bleep any gbola of your choice. In fact in some communities, you can only do that in your father's house.

You said your husband caught you with a man before, OK OOO

I see nothing wrong with it, same blood same family except she's not happy with the family.

clockwisereport:
Hello

Will you say this if she were your daughter or sister?

Yes I will say it. If she doesn't want to do that, she can as well go back to her father's house and start afresh to assess and evaluate gbolas that she will bleep. I will only not support such if the so-called man is mad, a thief or a murderer. Marriage is not boyfriend -girlfriend affair. It is a serious business. If you must marry as a lady, don't just be carried away by what you called " love" that for me, doesn't exist anywhere. Know the family and the community where you are marrying into properly. In my community, a woman is married to the entire family but it is the responsibility of her husband to maintain her in the other room. So if you are not ready to accord respect or regard to any other person apart from your husband, you may as well say in your father's house. In another community I know, as a woman if your husband dies, you are not to have any male friend once you are still in the man's house. If you want to bleep any man, you must pack out from your husband's house for you to do that. In the case we are treating, she can leave the family if she doesn't want to bleep the guy after all she doesn't have any child for her late husband.

goslowgoslow:
See childish reasoning! Na person like you go nak your broda wife while the man is alive. Must she remain in the family?

See adult reasoning. Is not about online saint. If we talk about living a moral life, I can beat my chest that I am ahead of you.

Well, its because the junior brother is probably a useless person. If he wasn't I am sure she would have considered. Can he provide for her, is he loving and caring? Also she has options. If she no do, leave her alone. Next.

You mean the same way Blessing Ceo told us she had Cancer abi 🤔

Lovelink1991:
Person is telling you her own life experiences of how the late husband's brother is disturbing her

Lovelink1991:
Leaving her children for a wicked mother-in-law? This is the reason she is asking for help in her next line of action.

What made you believe that I am a man. Do you want me to give you all my social media platforms for verification?

Leaving the family does not mean leaving her children for the mother-in-law. She goes with her children as the late husband's family have no legal right to have custody of the children.

Orinechi:
See adult reasoning. Is not about online saint. If we talk about living a moral life, I can beat my chest that I am ahead of you.

Delulu another childish reasoning and comment! Are you up to 20 years? You are beating your chest with someone you don't know online!
No body is a saint we are all sinners but thinking of naking your brother's ex wife is the height of disrespect and immorality. Is she the only woman available? Mr moral chest beater na your brother wife dey hungry you.....I can see your level of morality..

U accepted to sleep with him, so wetin remain
Women

goslowgoslow:
Delulu another childish reasoning and comment! Are you up to 20 years? You are beating your chest with someone you don't know online!
No body is a saint we are all sinners but thinking of naking your brother's ex wife is the height of disrespect and immorality. Is she the only woman available? Mr moral chest beater na your brother wife dey hungry you.....I can see your level of morality..

I still maintaining that if our level of morality should be assessed, I am ahead if you. The so-called woman does not have a child in that family. So if she doesn't want to be bleeped by her husband relative, she can as well relocate to her father's house. Read Deuteronomy 25: 5-10

Orinechi:
I still maintaining that if our level of morality should be assessed, I am ahead if you. The so-called woman does not have a child in that family. So if she doesn't want to be bleeped by her husband relative, she can as well relocate to her father's house.

This 20 years old kid thinks I will be going back and forth with him and his gibberish comments. You can continue with your mate your comments are childish and it doesn't make a single sense, you are still reasoning exactly like your age. Have a nice day.

goslowgoslow:
This 20 years old kid thinks I will be going back and forth with him and his gibberish comments. You can continue with your mate your comments are childish and it doesn't make a single sense, you are still reasoning exactly like your age. Have a nice day.

You don't have anything to say. An adult attacking the messenger instead of dwelling on the subject matter.

Orinechi:
You don't have anything to say. An adult attacking the messenger instead of dwelling on the subject matter.

You are blocked.

it's not a crime in Islamic religion if you agree if because of the love they have for you that is the reasoning they want you to remain in their family. if you wish agree otherwise choose your decision wisely