₦airaland Forum

Why not?

Yes, it happens because we devote time in training the maids on how to cook well, how to clean the house and on good mannerisms while leaving our own daughters untrained.

We overwork the maids and they adjust with equanimity because they need us to survive.

The maids turn out to manage the indignation and insolence we and our children subject them to. All these make the maids better wives who can manage even the angriest of men.

Our precious daughters are pampered through nursery and primary schools. They speak the English we want and know all the cartoon slangs by heart. We beat the maids blue black if they ever ask our girls to help out in domestic duties. They see kitchen things as maids' things.

The girls move from boarding schools to the university, do their NYSC, Masters and get a job. Of course, they are ripe for marriage and you wish that to happen soon.

From one relationship to another, the same story. The guys would parade and dump them. They are only good in bed, outings, clubs and red carpet functions.

The boys dump when they notice that the possible wife cannot cook, arrange things and are very domestically untrained. The rich guys can manage as they have resources to mitigate the handicap by hiring a domestic help. Not all guys can afford this for a start.

The upcoming and very sensitive guys who would make good husbands, fathers and leaders would not manage these parents' inflicted shortcomings. They would settle for well trained ones. They know the value and the pride in hosting friends at home to delicious delicacies prepared by a wife.

I factored the capacity to cook and make a home as I searched for a wife. My wife unknowingly sat and passed "delicious food cooking tests" before I made a final investment decision. Knowing how important this attribute is in keeping a marriage, I decided to ensure that these tantalizing values are replicated in my daughters.

It is a fact that not all your nmomaids would remain your servants for ever. Some of them would finally do part-time studies and like a train, get to their God ordained destinations sooner or later.

Like a perfume, good guys perceive well trained wife materials from afar and dump the daughters of the bourgeois or girls from wealthy families like hot iron. Long time happiness is at stake. No explanation is given. Sometimes, the sack message is made through a social medium.

Let your daughters learn what you teach your maids to make them compete for the few available good men if marriage is important to them. There are few guys who believe that marriage is for better for worse.

Don't be deceived; love is an active verb. Yes it is. You love; you loved; and you used to love. You can also hate who you used to love. Therefore, some men are immune to pre-marital love blindness.

In practice, love can't cover the stench of bad early formation of our daughters.

Right now, educated former maids are cornering better men on offer because they possess the requisite or set skills the highly perceptible and ready husband materials need.

Mothers please take note.

Lamanii22:
I don't know why some people need maid if it isn't laziness or show off, I don't like the idea at all, my neighbor has a small girl working as a maid, I don't even know the last time that girl went to school, they'd send her on errand even at night, maybe I should even report this to the authority set....

Lamanii22:
I don't know why some people need maid if it isn't laziness or show off, I don't like the idea at all, my neighbor has a small girl working as a maid, I don't even know the last time that girl went to school, they'd send her on errand even at night, maybe I should even report this to the authority set....

pocohantas:
I have had two house assistants (I rather not call them maid) and I ENJOYED it. I don't encourage using minors for domestic labour, but I employ adults. I also do not do live-in, and my decision to employ one had nothing to do with laziness or show-off. I simply conserved my time and energy for what is most important to us as a family. I would get another once I see a lady I connect with.

Kaczynski:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/House_slave
https://www.freedomfund.org/what-is-modern-slavery/domestic-servitude/
https://businessday.ng/offduty/article/domestic-help-or-modern-day-slavery/
https://www.vanguardngr.com/2020/02/maids-as-glorified-slaves-in-nigeria/

pocohantas:
Care to share how this correlates to my post?

Kaczynski:
House helps = modern day slavery.
You just rebranded slavery and added some toppings.

pocohantas:
Slavery: Slavery is the condition in which one human being is legally owned by another and forced to work without compensation.

---

My house assistants work conditions;

1) My two house assistants were adults.

2) They signed a formal contract to work for/with me.

3) Work hours are 9am to 5pm, Mon-Fri, and on days where they worked beyond 6pm, they were paid for extra hours. Mostly days we bulk cooked or had a lot of deep cleaning to do.

4) They were entitled to breakfast and lunch.

5) They handled everything but cooking and caregiving. Errands, sweep, mop, market pickup (I have a shopper, they only pickup from her), iron clothes, clean general areas. They never washed or ironed adult clothes.

6) They were paid above minimum wage. 100k/month to be very specific. N40,000 biweekly. N20,000 was kept aside as their pension, payable with its accumulated interest upon resignation.

7) They both lived within walkable distance. Like a 15mins walk, so they didn't incur transportation cost.


What part of this arrangement was slavery? I am open to learning because this seems like a day job to me and legal domestic staffing have existed in different forms under different names.

Kaczynski:
Slavery isn’t just chains and whips, It’s about control. It’s about making someone dependent on you for their livelihood. It’s about treating human beings like resources to be exploited.

pocohantas:
Slavery: Slavery is the condition in which one human being is legally owned by another and forced to work without compensation.

---

My house assistants work conditions;

1) My two house assistants were adults.

2) They signed a formal contract to work for/with me.

3) Work hours are 9am to 5pm, Mon-Fri, and on days where they worked beyond 6pm, they were paid for extra hours. Mostly days we bulk cooked or had a lot of deep cleaning to do.

4) They were entitled to breakfast and lunch.

5) They handled everything but cooking and caregiving. Errands, sweep, mop, market pickup (I have a shopper, they only pickup from her), iron clothes, clean general areas. They never washed or ironed adult clothes.

6) They were paid above minimum wage. 100k/month to be very specific. N40,000 biweekly. N20,000 was kept aside as their pension, payable with its accumulated interest upon resignation.

7) They both lived within walkable distance. Like a 15mins walk, so they didn't incur transportation cost.


What part of this arrangement was slavery? I am open to learning because this seems like a day job to me and legal domestic staffing have existed in different forms under different names.

pocohantas:
Lol! You are simply delusional.
Adults took a job as a domestic staff. They go home to their families everyday and you say I am exploiting them? Which labour rule was flouted? Their future is in their hands now, they are not working with me anymore.😂

pocohantas:
Slavery: Slavery is the condition in which one human being is legally owned by another and forced to work without compensation.

---

My house assistants work conditions;

1) My two house assistants were adults.

2) They signed a formal contract to work for/with me.

3) Work hours are 9am to 5pm, Mon-Fri, and on days where they worked beyond 6pm, they were paid for extra hours. Mostly days we bulk cooked or had a lot of deep cleaning to do.

4) They were entitled to breakfast and lunch.

5) They handled everything but cooking and caregiving. Errands, sweep, mop, market pickup (I have a shopper, they only pickup from her), iron clothes, clean general areas. They never washed or ironed adult clothes.

6) They were paid above minimum wage. 100k/month to be very specific. N40,000 biweekly. N20,000 was kept aside as their pension, payable with its accumulated interest upon resignation.

7) They both lived within walkable distance. Like a 15mins walk, so they didn't incur transportation cost.


What part of this arrangement was slavery? I am open to learning because this seems like a day job to me and legal domestic staffing have existed in different forms under different names.

stuffs2002:
Abeg gerarahia

See the way your mouth sharp dey praise yourself. Let us ask the maids and see if they will say all those glowing attributes about you

LabStores:

Modern-day men are increasingly drawn to traditional women for marriage, not because they want slaves or silence, but because peace, loyalty, respect, family values, and emotional stability still matter.

Many men are no longer searching for the loudest woman in the room. They want a partner who understands teamwork, support, commitment, and building together. Beauty may attract, but character sustains a home.

Ironically, in many homes today, the maid is often seen as more respectful, responsible, humble, caring, and family-oriented than the daughters raised with entitlement and social media validation. That says a lot about modern upbringing.

A wife is not chosen only by fashion, vibes, or online popularity. High value smart Men observe attitude, temperament, discipline, kindness, and how a woman treats people when there is nothing to gain.

At the end of the day, many men still want peace more than pressure, partnership more than competition, and a woman who can help build a home, not just decorate one.

CodeTemplar:
what do you do for a living?

Kaczynski:
That's slavery in the 90s. Modern day slavery is utterly different.

You’re overcompensating to mask the fact that you’re treating them like indentured servants basically dangling their future like a carrot on a stick. You’re ensuring they’re always within arm’s reach like a well-trained pet.

You’re the one dictating their every move. They don’t get to choose their tasks, you assign them like a prison warden.


Slavery isn’t just chains and whips, It’s about control. It’s about making someone dependent on you for their livelihood. It’s about treating human beings like resources to be exploited.

This isn’t a job. This is wage slavery with a side of paternalistic bs. You’re not their boss, you’re their warden.

pocohantas:
I work like most Nigerians.

Why asking?

CodeTemplar:
Armed robbery is a work. Prostitution too. Which of them do you do?

pocohantas:
I have had two house assistants (I rather not call them maid) and I ENJOYED it. I don't encourage using minors for domestic labour, but I employ adults. I also do not do live-in, and my decision to employ one had nothing to do with laziness or show-off. I simply conserved my time and energy for what is most important to us as a family. I would get another once I see a lady I connect with.

motymop:
I am tired of reading lamba on nairaland
Ok, the uneducated maid can cook more than the educated daughter ......ok
and then what?
now men will go for the uneducated maid
looks like the writer watches too much nollywood movies

Lamanii22:
I don't know why some people need maid if it isn't laziness or show off, I don't like the idea at all, my neighbor has a small girl working as a maid, I don't even know the last time that girl went to school, they'd send her on errand even at night, maybe I should even report this to the authority set....