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If Sex Is Not Your Thing, You Shouldn’t Be Married— Pastor Godman Akinlabi, Warns That Unmet Intimacy Needs Can Fuel Infidelity

Speaking during a recent episode of The MorayoShow, Pastor Godman Akinlabi said infidelity in marriage should not always be viewed from a one-sided perspective, arguing that both s+xual incompatibility and a lack of self-discipline can contribute to unfaithfulness.

The pastor explained that some cases of ad¥ltery may stem from situations where one partner feels deprived of intimacy within the marriage. According to him, s+xual compatibility is an important part of a healthy relationship and should not be overlooked by couples.

Akinlabi recounted counselling a woman who told him that s+x was not important to her. Responding to the situation, he said “S+x has to be your thing. If s+x is not your thing, you shouldn’t be married.

You’re going to make somebody’s life miserable.”He stressed that intimacy is a significant aspect of marriage and that couples facing challenges in that area should seek help rather than ignore the problem.

He argued that when s+xual incompatibility exists and remains unresolved, some partners may become tempted to seek satisfaction outside the marriage.

However, the pastor maintained that not every case of infidelity is caused by unmet needs at home. He noted that some men engage in extramarital affairs because of what he described as uncontrolled s+xual desires, regardless of the level of intimacy available in their marriages.

Akinlabi emphasized that self-discipline is crucial in maintaining faithfulness, stating that some individuals will continue to look outside their relationships even when their needs are being met. He concluded that lasting commitment in marriage requires both mutual effort from spouses and personal responsibility.

https://www.tiktok.com/video/7655270557268659476?_r=1&_t=ZS-97WyHDxXvn7

Sex is not my thing.
I'm married with 3 children.
Come and beat me .
Everytime sex this, sex that. As if sex is food and oxygen.

spiceadole:
Sex is not my thing.
I'm married with 3 children.
Come and beat me .
Everytime sex this, sex that. As if sex is food and oxygen.

My dear, don't you think marriage is not for you? Why do you choose to allow that gentleman go through all these? It is nothing but wickedness.

It is, for your husband.

I feel sorry for him.

spiceadole:
Sex is not my thing.
I'm married with 3 children.
Come and beat me .
Everytime sex this, sex that. As if sex is food and oxygen.

GodHimself:
It is, for your husband.

I feel sorry for him.

They always go out.

So it doesn't matter.

UnbiasTruth:
My dear, don't you think marriage is not for you? Why do you choose to allow that gentleman man go through all these? It is nothing but wickedness.

The men always go out , no matter how much sex they get from their wives.

So it doesn't matter

spiceadole:
Sex is not my thing.
I'm married with 3 children.
Come and beat me .
Everytime sex this, sex that. As if sex is food and oxygen.

They will leave the gospel of salvation and be invading people's privacy!

spiceadole:
Sex is not my thing.
I'm married with 3 children.
Come and beat me .
Everytime sex this, sex that. As if sex is food and oxygen.

Sex is not your thing and you already have three kids (abi you be virgin mary)

The way women deceive themselves these days baffles me.

I hate women that pretends when it comes to sex.except you have infections that makes you not to enjoy sex, then I will reason with you.

spiceadole:
The men always go out , no matter how much sex they get from their wives.

So it doesn't matter

Tell them my sister


They always make it seem like men cheat on their wives simply because their wife is not giving them enough sex, thats pure lies.


Funny enough, most men dont know why they are cheating on their wife or partner.


Even if you give a man sex ten times a day and different styles on earth and those yet to be discovered, he will still cheat.


If you like, fine more than Mami iwota and have big bombom and everything, he will still cheat when that natural crave for something entirely new comes knocking and he has the money and opportunity.


Funny enough, people, especially women dont know that a man can love his wife or partner and still cheat on her with another woman. In summary, a man in love with a woman can still cheat with another woman. Men love differently from women. Though romantic love is a fallacy, but in the context of worldly affair of man and woman, I chose to use the word "love".


Why did I said romantic love is a fallacy? Because love comes without a condition. And there is no romantic love between any man and woman without a condition. He loves you because you are physically attractive, beautiful, have good character, can cook, take care of the home, good in bed, industrious, doesnt demand money from him, etc. She loves you because you take care of her, you are tall, handsome, jovial, you are very good in bed, you have long d, you are intelligent, smart, rich, famous, have good dress sense, you live abroad, you drive luxury cars, own luxury houses, you helped her get a job, get admission, helped her travel abroad, helped pay her school fees, etc. All these are some of the conditions that made you claim to love him or her, fell in love with him or her, which makes it conditional, hence I said romantic love is a fallacy because its always based on conditions, whereas true love comes without a condition, and mostly exist between those related by blood (e.g. Mother and child, father and child, some siblings, etc).



Back to your comment, you are correct.....the only things that can make a sexually active man not to cheat are:


1.) He has absolute fear of God which has nothing to do with the woman he married

2.) He has absolute fear of his deity/idol

3.) He is extremely broke

4.) He lacks the opportunity to cheat due to several reasons; money/location/environment, work/religious doctrines and affiliation/political/social commitments gives him no time or opportunity to cheat, it happens a lot


5.) Illness or disease; it could be sexual related illness, including low libido, partial impotence and low sex drive


6.) Age; age comes with different changes and burdens. Age affects a lot of men when it comes to sexual desire. Some men start losing interest in sex from age 45 and above, yes it happens a lot.


7.) Social status; some status limits a man's chances of fulfilling his sexual fantasies with the opposite sex. If embarking on such mission will affect his status, he might never do it though he might end up playing with himself at times through adult video motivation



NOTE: any man that tells you that the reason he doesnt cheat on his wife is because he loves his wife so much is nothing but a liar. Loving your wife or partner alone is not enough reason to stop a man from wishing or trying to explore other women. A man can love his wife and still cheat on her!

spiceadole:
Sex is not my thing.
I'm married with 3 children.
Come and beat me .
Everytime sex this, sex that. As if sex is food and oxygen.

I wasn't going to respond until I read your last line which, if you don't know, and I'm very sure but you're just frustrated at the topic, yes, sex is food and oxygen to marriages.



https://www.tiktok.com/video/7526889926714051896
Statistically, physical intimacy acts as a stabilizing force in marriage, with research showing that having sex just once a week correlates with the highest levels of relationship satisfaction. While increasing frequency beyond that baseline does not significantly boost happiness, a complete drop in intimacy carries heavy risks, as a lack of physical connection is a primary driver of infidelity and roughly 80% of divorced couples cite the long-term erosion of intimacy as the root cause of their separation.

Over time, sexual intimacy is the single strongest statistical predictor of marital happiness during the first three years of marriage, but for couples together longer than a decade, emotional closeness and shared quality time eventually overtake sexual frequency as the top predictors of a lasting bond.

SixSeven:
I wasn't going to respond until I read your last line which, if you don't know, sex is food and oxygen to marriages.

Statistically, physical intimacy acts as a stabilizing force in marriage, with research showing that having sex just once a week correlates with the highest levels of relationship satisfaction. While increasing frequency beyond that baseline does not significantly boost happiness, a complete drop in intimacy carries heavy risks, as a lack of physical connection is a primary driver of infidelity and roughly 80% of divorced couples cite the long-term erosion of intimacy as the root cause of their separation.

Over time, sexual intimacy is the single strongest statistical predictor of marital happiness during the first three years of marriage, but for couples together longer than a decade, emotional closeness and shared quality time eventually overtake sexual frequency as the top predictors of a lasting bond.

After like 10 years in marriage, couple that have sex once a week or thrice a month is not bad.


I think what she meant by sex is not food is for those who expect to have sex with their wife everyday or even 3 to 4 times a day even after 10 years in marriage, such habit is not even healthy to my own understanding Sha.


Twice or thrice a month is enough for old couples that have spent like 8 to 10 years together in marriage.


As for the men expecting sex everyday from their wives or wives expecting such from their husband, they are not being realistic or they are suffering from a compulsive sexual behavior or hypersexuality which are all forms of illness that need attention.


Any man that craves for sex everyday with his wife is definitely suffering satyriasis.

franchasng:
After like 10 years in marriage, couple that have sex once a week or thrice a month is not bad.


I think what she meant by sex is not food is for those who expect to have sex with their wife everyday or even 3 to 4 times a day even after 10 years in marriage, such habit is not even healthy to my own understanding Sha.


Once a week or thrice a month is enough for old couples that have spent like 8 to 10 years together in marriage.


As for the men expecting sex everyday from their wives or wives expecting such from their husband, they are not being realistic or they are suffering from a compulsive sexual behavior or hypersexuality which are all forms of illness that need attention.


Any man that craves for sex everyday with his wife is definitely suffering satyriasis.

I can't speak to the frequency of having sex as that is peculiar to each relationship and their situation in life but one thing I know is that people don't prepare for life stresses in marriages. The way the woman changes after pregnancy and how surviving life and carrying a family changes a man, I would not easily judge it.

Personally, I think you have better things to do with your life instead of sex everyday but some people use it as coping mechanism to relieve tension and stress. Having sex every day is a healthy, normal lifestyle choice for roughly 4% of couples who naturally possess high libidos and use physical intimacy for connection, stress relief, and biological satisfaction. Many partners also use daily intimacy as a quick, low-maintenance way to "turn off their brains" and unwind after long work hours. This is another reason why I like to evaluate people's physiology and psychology. Why are they doing that thing they are doing? If they smoke, waste time at the bar, drink, play games, talk, what are they escaping from?

I'm just trying to tell her that sex is food to men not necessarily because men cannot do other things and reason well, it's mainly because his biology is made up in a way that he has to release those sperms. Her biology changes every 28 days that there are certain specific days she wants to receive him. She wants him to reason, his biology want to have sex before reason so a hungry man is a bull, he just wants food aunty. If you have it, give him. We can talk about how you bought the food, where you bought it from etc but most men will reset after you give him that food. Sex is food to men, majority of them. That's the 'dark side' to marriage, he wants the sexual partner that he is sure of that is his own. He doesn't want to write a story book over it, to the women they feel that is as if they are commodities to be used whenever he feels like doing it but I just want them to understand the biology of it inasmuch as men should also understand the emotions of having sex and getting a woman wet before the do.

That's a flimsy generalised excuse used to deny husbands something fundamental to their wellbeing.

If he's still reaching for you after 3 kids, he wants and desires you, saggy tits and all.

Just admit you don't desire him and you settled for him, he wasn't your first choice, and he doesn't turn you on like the other bad boys you dated.

spiceadole:
They always go out.

So it doesn't matter.

spiceadole:
Sex is not my thing.
I'm married with 3 children.
Come and beat me .
Everytime sex this, sex that. As if sex is food and oxygen.

Unless your husband is a fool, he is getting his fill elsewhere. If that doesn't bother you then you're probably a witch.

Yes oooooo, they would be saying sex isn't food.

From man's angle. For the fact I'm taking care of her and her kids, what else did she need? Meanwhile, the same man would be sleeping with different women recklessly outside.


From woman's angle. Every morning, he would be asking me to open my body, I'm I dog?

Someone who isn't ready for regular sex, shouldn't think about marriage.

Comfirm



Ajeh



Correct




Pastor.

Pastor Akanbi...

Leave sex topics and talk about your people in the bushes.

UnlimitedNG:
https://w

People don't wait for marriage nowadays before having sex... changing society due to social media

silibaba:
Sex is not your thing and you already have three kids (abi you be virgin mary)

The way women deceive themselves these days baffles me.

I hate women that pretends when it comes to sex.except you have infections that makes you not to enjoy sex, then I will reason with you.

I taya oo! 3 children and sex is not her thing. Imagine how many time she would have to have sex to get pregnant with 3 children. but wait oo! unless the 3 children are not her's biologically

spiceadole:
Sex is not my thing.
I'm married with 3 children.
Come and beat me .
Everytime sex this, sex that. As if sex is food and oxygen.

. Close your Thing , It's Food ..Just like food is for the mouth so also it's for the Body .

Women like you go Crazy when Man Begins to Satisfy himself outside ...That Your Man needs freedom from the cage U Put am

Very outmoded way of thinking.

There are males and females who don't like sex much naturally. It's not weird.

Why should such person not marry.

You're the pastor that say people should not have sex before marriage. You're also the one saying such person should not marry if they don't like sex.

How will a person who did not have sex before marriage know they don't like sex until after marriage

spiceadole:
Sex is not my thing.
I'm married with 3 children.
Come and beat me .
Everytime sex this, sex that. As if sex is food and oxygen.

I bet you had sex many times before getting preggas with 3 children. Unless your children were adopted una no dey use sense talk sometimes.

spiceadole:
Sex is not my thing.
I'm married with 3 children.
Come and beat me .
Everytime sex this, sex that. As if sex is food and oxygen.

as u r denying him sex, are you concerned that he is banging someone else

Guys don't blame him does pastors and Alfas has any work than on Sunday to preach on the alta and on Friday Alfa talks in the mosque pls what else do they do again for the rest 6 days? Nothing, so why can't they be taking sexnadol or sexoquin or sexcentamol tablets everyday? They have no job afterall so they must do opueh round the clock na.

esnbrutality:
Pastor Akanbi...

Leave sex topics and talk about your people in the bushes.

so he is now the Inspector General of Police

silibaba:
Sex is not your thing and you already have three kids (abi you be virgin mary)

The way women deceive themselves these days baffles me.

I hate women that pretends when it comes to sex.except you have infections that makes you not to enjoy sex, then I will reason with you.

It is actually men she is deceiving. There is a very bad and evil reason why she is saying this.

Men really need to understand that when women speak, they are doing something else that always affect men negatively.

Men should pay attention that when women speak, they are speaking in codes. If you understood their codes you would have seen that she is lying

spiceadole:
Sex is not my thing.
I'm married with 3 children.
Come and beat me .
Everytime sex this, sex that. As if sex is food and oxygen.

He's talking about sex in marriage not casual sex boyfriends have with their girlfriends.

Sex in marriage is very important because it helps to bind you and your husband as one.

I say the problem is many nigerian women after getting married becomes lazy, fat, unkept, they stop bathing, they stop looking sexy, they just eat, eat, eat and eat and on their phones all day long.

I remember taking a nice 25 years old woman i just met to a fine restaurant for fresh fish and vegetable food in nigeria and expecting a good conversations while we ate. She was on her phone from the start to the end of the eating the food. I was quite disappointed her phone was more interesting than food, me and may be sex. ...


So back to sex, many Married and unmarried nigerian women preffer tapping on their smart phones than romance and sex.

No wahala! If i marry you and you no wan sex, it's fine! Sex plenty for Cubana Enugu

E good like that, make I just dey my dey like that.

spiceadole:
Sex is not my thing.
I'm married with 3 children.
Come and beat me .
Everytime sex this, sex that. As if sex is food and oxygen.

Except sex is not ALSO a thing for your husband, then he must be
Sex starved
Miserable and
Under punishment till death do you part