₦airaland Forum

Imagine this scenario.

A young woman relocates to Abuja hoping for a better life. Fortune smiles on her and she meets a wealthy politician who is a member of the House of Representatives.

The relationship moves quickly.

He pays for an apartment in the Central Area worth ₦6 million a year. Life suddenly changes. The expensive neighbourhood, designer clothes, luxury restaurants and social media pictures all create the impression that she has "made it."

Then reality happens.

Five months later, another attractive woman enters the picture. The politician loses interest and moves on.

Thing is, the rent remains, the lifestyle remains, the bills remain but the politician does not. Many people mistake access for ownership.

Living in a luxury apartment does not mean you can afford one. Driving an expensive car does not mean you own it. Enjoying someone's wealth is completely different from creating wealth yourself.

This is not just about women or relationships. The same principle applies to anyone whose standard of living depends entirely on another person's generosity.

Whether it is a boyfriend, girlfriend, parent, political godfather or employer, building a lifestyle you cannot personally sustain is financially dangerous.

A better approach is to live below your means, invest in skills, build your own income and make financial decisions based on what you can maintain if every external support disappears tomorrow.

Luxury feels good but Financial independence feels better.

If you suddenly lost every financial support you currently enjoy today, could you comfortably maintain your present lifestyle?

That question is worth thinking about.

Some people live on pocket checking others..

Dpsychologist:
Imagine this scenario.

A young woman relocates to Abuja hoping for a better life. Fortune smiles on her and she meets a wealthy politician who is a member of the House of Representatives.

The relationship moves quickly.

He pays for an apartment in the Central Area worth ₦6 million a year. Life suddenly changes. The expensive neighbourhood, designer clothes, luxury restaurants and social media pictures all create the impression that she has "made it."

Then reality happens.

Five months later, another attractive woman enters the picture. The politician loses interest and moves on.

Thing is, the rent remains, the lifestyle remains, the bills remain but the politician does not. Many people mistake access for ownership.

Living in a luxury apartment does not mean you can afford one. Driving an expensive car does not mean you own it. Enjoying someone's wealth is completely different from creating wealth yourself.

This is not just about women or relationships. The same principle applies to anyone whose standard of living depends entirely on another person's generosity.

Whether it is a boyfriend, girlfriend, parent, political godfather or employer, building a lifestyle you cannot personally sustain is financially dangerous.

A better approach is to live below your means, invest in skills, build your own income and make financial decisions based on what you can maintain if every external support disappears tomorrow.

Luxury feels good but Financial independence feels better.

If you suddenly lost every financial support you currently enjoy today, could you comfortably maintain your present lifestyle?

That question is worth thinking about.

fabricated jargons una no dey tire

That is correct and should be a basic and commen knowledge but ironically, common sense is no longer common in this generation.

UNFORTUNATELY thats how it happens with most women, they dont really think.
A lot of things are mixed up in our Nigeria/Africa settings.

Take for instance, a woman will go to Shiloh or Zion or one of those silly places, to pray and look for a man, Weeks later, a man with some money shows up. They quickly attribute the emergence of the man to Shiloh, Zion, native doctor , chapel or wherever they went for that purpose.
The man start spending on the woman as the OP said. Things are moving fast. She is already planning a lavish wedding in her empty head. Then boom, another girl from Shiloh or somewhere else shows up in front of the man. Another small girl with big god.
Story changes.
The first empty head with wigs has already started getting used to a life her parents and siblings can't sponsor. Instagram and Facebook are already full of her pictures snapped in high end places.

The reality is that these empty heads with wigs will never understand that the emergence of the man has nothing to do with Shiloh or Zion, it happened by chance.

Solution: If they can accept that it happened by chance, they will be more prepared to minimize their lavish lifestyle which is hinged to another person's money.

I had a lady friend. She believe that what her toto cannot do does not exist.

I still dey pity her.

You are right Bro.


Building your lifestyle on someone else's wallet is like building a Mansion on a quick sand right in the middle of the desert.

People desire luxury, they pray for it, they kill for it, the steal for it. But the big question is;

CAN YOU SUSTAIN IT??

Acquiring luxury is more easier than sustaining it. Also switching from luxury to a moderate lifestyle is even more depressing.

This also goes for invalids that depend on ritual and scarifies to make money, note the day that the Witch doctor who
did the charm for you die, that is the very day your fake wealth disappear like the smell of fart.

As a lady I have vow never to follow trend or do what my mate are doing (I made this vow since when I was 16 years).
I am so slow in catching up trends or happenings, till the extent I fill like I am in another world of my own.

My guy is even worst than me. TWO OF US NO OPEN EYE AT ALL

The only thing we are good at is football. He love Ronaldo and I over love Messi.



May God help us

free2ryhme:
fabricated jargons una no dey tire

Either this is fabricated or not , it is reality of many both female and male.

That is why sometimes when the Breadwinner leave either through death or otherwise, the dependents find it difficult to cope with their usual lifestyle.

Not really a big deal sha... life is not all bed of roses..

Enjoy while it last.

Tow Tow power, wahala for who carry problems.

All these ona advise here can be very confusing sometimes


Anyways, i build websites and apps

DickenClarq:
You are right Bro.
Building your lifestyle on someone else's wallet is like building a Mansion on a quick sand right in the middle of the desert.
May God help us

How can he be right when Remi Tinubu is building her luxury life on the wallet of taxes from akara sellers?
Make you sef reason the thing now.

chisomkachy:
Nigerian President Bola Tinubu’s first supplementary budget includes a fleet of SUVs for himself and his wife, a presidential yacht and the renovation of his villa amid a cost-of-living crisis for some of the poorest people in the world.

The proposal — which seeks additional funding beyond the annual budget approved by Tinubu’s predecessor — comes as the government asks Nigerians to persevere through pain caused in part by a raft of economic reforms ushered in by the new president. Africa’s most populous country faces rampant unemployment, soaring food prices and a plummeting currency.

Federal lawmakers approved the president’s request for extra spending on Thursday, but eliminated the provision of 5 billion naira ($6.01 million) to buy a presidential yacht. Instead, they doubled the allocation to a student loan fund to 10 billion naira, according Abubakar Bichi, chairman of an appropriations committee in the House of Representatives.

The lawmakers approved 1.5 billion-naira proposed to purchase SUVs for the office of First Lady Oluremi Tinubu — an amount larger than that allocated to many individual federal colleges. The supplementary budget also proposes almost 6 billion naira to purchase SUVs for the presidency — more than the amount initially allocated to fund a student loan program for poor families.


https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2023-11-02/nigeria-budgets-for-suvs-and-yachts-amid-economic-hardship

echike:
That is correct and should be a basic and commen knowledge but ironically, common sense is no longer common in this generation.

If common sense is no longer common, then what enlightenment work are you doing to redress the gap

This is a good write up and we hope our women most especially, will learn from this

one take away from this is that you can be saving up or building your own empire privately while enjoying that privilege. Some people are so unintelligent that they eat up everything hoping that that flow of income will not cease on day

Nothing is permanent, if you are opportune to enjoy a privilege, enjoy it while it last but make sure you create your own future from that leverage.

But in all, don't steal from the finger that feeds you!

True life opportunities happen,but what you as a person make out of that opportunity is another reason to determine your safe landing or crashing landing in life....

The thing is most young women don't even know that the kind of men that they entertain actually set them up for a kind of lifestyle that they can't even keep up with again when the same man isn't in their life again.

Most of them don't know.

Very true . Thanks OP for this

Complaints to or against moderators must be sent privately. Please don't disobey, disrespect, or defame them.

Thank you but they never learn,

Dpsychologist:
Imagine this scenario.

A young woman relocates to Abuja hoping for a better life. Fortune smiles on her and she meets a wealthy politician who is a member of the House of Representatives.

The relationship moves quickly.

He pays for an apartment in the Central Area worth ₦6 million a year. Life suddenly changes. The expensive neighbourhood, designer clothes, luxury restaurants and social media pictures all create the impression that she has "made it."

Then reality happens.

Five months later, another attractive woman enters the picture. The politician loses interest and moves on.

Thing is, the rent remains, the lifestyle remains, the bills remain but the politician does not. Many people mistake access for ownership.

Living in a luxury apartment does not mean you can afford one. Driving an expensive car does not mean you own it. Enjoying someone's wealth is completely different from creating wealth yourself.

It all depends. If you have a gun...

All the young lady has to do is threaten to expose the politician if he steps an inch. Show him pictures your lawyer will send to his wife and newspapers if anything happens to her

I don't get this

We all are depending on others for our lifestyle..this is fact

We depend on our employers for salaries
We depend on customers for our business revenue
We depend on families for gift
Women depends on men to live their lifestyle
Men depends on other men to live their lifestyle

The world works in a way that you have to depend on someone to live your lifestyle

I think at the end of the day what matters is that you have to save for the low times

Simple as ABC life no hard!

anonimi:
If common sense is no longer common, then what enlightenment work are you doing to redress the gap

Come make en open your brain, so that he can fill it up with sense. 😏

echike:
That is correct and should be a basic and commen knowledge but ironically, common sense is no longer common in this generation.

If you know, you know.
If you know, you know.

OP, your topics are always interesting. It comes from a totally different perspective. You have earned my respect. Please keep talking sense to Nigerian youths.

The punch line for me...." Many people mistake access for ownership"

free2ryhme:
fabricated jargons una no dey tire

I wonder why people like you hate truth.

AbosedeFalade:
I wonder why people like you hate truth.

at ur age you need someone to tell fabricate stories to tell you this


you think life is nollywood script

ZUBY77:
UNFORTUNATELY thats how it happens with most women, they dont really think.
A lot of things are mixed up in our Nigeria/Africa settings.

Take for instance, a woman will go to Shiloh or Zion or one of those silly places, to pray and look for a man, Weeks later, a man with some money shows up. They quickly attribute the emergence of the man to Shiloh, Zion, native doctor , chapel or wherever they went for that purpose.
The man start spending on the woman as the OP said. Things are moving fast. She is already planning a lavish wedding in her empty head. Then boom, another girl from Shiloh or somewhere else shows up in front of the man. Another small girl with big god.
Story changes.
The first empty head with wigs has already started getting used to a life her parents and siblings can't sponsor. Instagram and Facebook are already full of her pictures snapped in high end places.

The reality is that these empty heads with wigs will never understand that the emergence of the man has nothing to do with Shiloh or Zion, it happened by chance.

Solution: If they can accept that it happened by chance, they will be more prepared to minimize their lavish lifestyle which is hinged to another person's money.

Bro, you lacketh chill o

free2ryhme:
at ur age you need someone to tell fabricate stories to tell you this


you think life is nollywood script

I blame the poverty around you for your shallow way of reasoning.

Most of the ladies who live this lifestyle are not fools and they know the windfall from one single source can run dry at any time.

So they hedge their bets and service multiple high value (in terms of cash), so if she gets dumped by one, there are at least 3 or 4 others left, while she actively hustles for a replacement

AbosedeFalade:
I blame the poverty around you for your shallow way of reasoning.

You are always quick to bring up poverty; it appears to occupy a significant space in your mindset and the way you view issues.