₦airaland Forum

Brb , a moment please , I’ll be back

Mrexcell:
Am sure u are talking about nigerian ladies i don't think white women and other women from other countries behaves in such a way and prefers to be with bad guys instead of kind guys that takes good care of them.

No he is talking about low/no value choatic women who brings no value to a relationship and often are leeches. Outgrow them man by doubling down on yourself.

There is nothing extreme here.
You have not seen life. At all!

Hhh4444:
Exactly, Women will hate you for being kind to them unnecessarily...As a man,make a woman earn your kindness, that's when it's valued. An unearned kindness towards a woman is interpreted as weakness. Sometimes,deny her the kindness she earned and she would value you for it. In a woman's brain,less effort is interpreted as high value. The mind of women work opposite to the the way a man's mind works.

Prof! Prof!!

Professor of Women Affairs

Goodmarlian:
When it comes to women nobody wins not the bad boy not the good boy,if she is dating a nonchalant boy she will cheat with a good guy that treats her like a queen ,if she is dating a good guy she will cheat with a bad boy that treats her non challantly she belongs to nobody

@bold:

Ah Toor!

Dpsychologist:
There is something I have observed over the years, and I would like to hear other people's opinions on it.

Many men seem to end up in one of two extremes.

If you are the confident, unpredictable and "bad boy" type, many women appear to enjoy the excitement you bring. They overlook your flaws, forgive your mistakes more easily and sometimes even compete for your attention. You become someone they want to chase, even when your actions do not always deserve it.

On the other hand, if you are the dependable, respectful and genuinely kind man, life can take a completely different turn. Instead of being appreciated, your kindness is sometimes mistaken for weakness. Your generosity becomes an expectation insteadTitle: As a Man, You Are Either the Exciting Guy or the Useful Guy. Why Is There Rarely a Balance?

There is something I have observed over the years, and I would like to hear other people's opinions on it.

Many men seem to end up in one of two extremes.

If you are the confident, unpredictable and "bad boy" type, many women appear to enjoy the excitement you bring. They overlook your flaws, forgive your mistakes more easily and sometimes even compete for your attention. You become someone they want to chase, even when your actions do not always deserve it.

On the other hand, if you are the dependable, respectful and genuinely kind man, life can take a completely different turn. Instead of being appreciated, your kindness is sometimes mistaken for weakness. Your generosity becomes an expectation instead of something valued. Your time, your emotional support and your money slowly become things people feel entitled to rather than grateful for.

Many good men have discovered that the more they give without setting boundaries, the more they are expected to give. The relationship gradually becomes less about mutual love and more about what they can provide. Once they stop providing, the treatment often changes almost immediately.

This raises an uncomfortable question.

Why does it sometimes seem easier to be desired as the exciting man than appreciated as the dependable man?

Personally, I do not think the solution is becoming toxic or pretending to be a bad boy. Neither do I believe men should become bitter or stop being kind.

The real solution is balance.

A man should be kind but never naive. He should be generous but not allow himself to be exploited. He should love deeply while still maintaining self respect. He should help willingly without becoming anyone's personal ATM.

Kindness without boundaries attracts exploitation. Confidence without character creates chaos. Healthy relationships require both love and mutual respect.

Perhaps the biggest lesson for men is this: never build your entire value around what you can provide financially. Build yourself into a man whose presence, character and principles are just as valuable as his wallet.

What do you think?

Do you agree that many men are either explored for excitement or exploited for provision, or do you see it differently? of something valued. Your time, your emotional support and your money slowly become things people feel entitled to rather than grateful for.

Many good men have discovered that the more they give without setting boundaries, the more they are expected to give. The relationship gradually becomes less about mutual love and more about what they can provide. Once they stop providing, the treatment often changes almost immediately.

This raises an uncomfortable question.

Why does it sometimes seem easier to be desired as the exciting man than appreciated as the dependable man?

Personally, I do not think the solution is becoming toxic or pretending to be a bad boy. Neither do I believe men should become bitter or stop being kind.

The real solution is balance.

A man should be kind but not naive. He should be generous but not allow himself to be exploited. He should love deeply while still maintaining self respect. He should help willingly without becoming everyone's personal ATM.

Kindness without boundaries attracts exploitation. Confidence without character creates chaos. Healthy relationships require both love and mutual respect.

Perhaps the biggest lesson for men is this: never build your entire value around what you can provide financially. Build yourself into a man whose presence, character and principles are just as valuable as his wallet.

What do you think?

Do you agree that many men are either explored for excitement or exploited for provision, or do you see it differently?

This is a thought provoking post. And I like that your stance is as neutral as possible. I know you alluded your post mainly to the confines of man-woman relationship, so permit me to stretch the argument a bit further from that purview.

Society have succeeded in finding a way to demand people with a brain to change and not the arrogant , disrespectful and abuser who I think still have a brain too. If not, why would being respectful and kind become detestable traits? That people are deeming it fit to take advantage of? And when something jeopardizing happens, we give the victim advice.” Don’t be too kind, it’s not just good” And then turn around to lament how the world is not a better place when the few good ones that could make that possible are being met with backlashes that turns them evil making sure that there’s no hope for the human race.

In international relations, this is referred to as the “ tragedy of the commons” collectively we want a better world, but individually, we keep taking selfish steps that furthermore leads to it’s destruction

And as for a man finding himself between these two extremes in relation with his dealing with women? What does it matter if you’re the nice or bad boy ? Both parties are still slaves fuffulling every feminine needs. Nothing but exhaustion at the end. A lose lose situation. Only semblance of a victory resides with the man who has decided to go his own way(mgtow). And even that , society will make sure you die in isolation and live your days as a social pariah
That is after word might have got around that you’re either gay or impotent. And then, treated accordingly.

Gbamsolutely!!

Oldhead:
This is a thought provoking post. And I like that your stance is as neutral as possible. I know you alluded your post mainly to the confines of man-woman relationship, so permit me to stretch the argument a bit further from that purview.

Society have succeeded in finding a way to demand people with a brain to change and not the arrogant , disrespectful and abuser who I think still have a brain too. If not, why would being respectful and kind become detestable traits? That people are deeming it fit to take advantage of? And when something jeopardizing happens, we give the victim advice.” Don’t be too kind, it’s not just good” And then turn around to lament how the world is not a better place when the few good ones that could make that possible are being met with backlashes that turns them evil making sure that there’s no hope for the human race.

In international relations, this is referred to as the “ tragedy of the commons” collectively we want a better world, but individually, we keep taking selfish steps that furthermore leads to it’s destruction

And as for a man finding himself between these two extremes in relation with his dealing with women? What does it matter if you’re the nice or bad boy ? Both parties are still slaves fuffulling every feminine needs. Nothing but exhaustion at the end. A lose lose situation. Only semblance of a victory resides with the man who has decided to go his own way(mgtow). And even that , society will make sure you die in isolation and live your days as a social pariah
That is after word might have got around that you’re either gay or impotent. And then, treated accordingly.

All these because men haven't still learnt who their enemy is

Goodmarlian:
When it comes to women nobody wins not the bad boy not the good boy,if she is dating a nonchalant boy she will cheat with a good guy that treats her like a queen ,if she is dating a good guy she will cheat with a bad boy that treats her non challantly she belongs to nobody

Tell them

AngelSlay:
I think this presents a false dilemma. Men are not limited to being either the "bad boy" or the "nice guy." Most healthy, well-adjusted men fall somewhere in the middle. They are confident without being arrogant, kind without being pushovers, and assertive without being toxic....

And they still lost and were still kicked out too, so your theory still does not work

pocohantas:
Because women no appreciate "kindness", make person come dey wicked? Some of una no too get sense.

Person wey no appreciate kindness na wicked person and he deserve Wike.ness,Tinubuness and Buhariness

Fiscus105:
Not until you people know that kindness is different from foolishness, you will keep talking thrash about man to woman relationship, common sense needs to tell you if you are extending hands of kindness to particular person over time and instead to resprocating, she is be ungrateful, you need to cut it immediately

Do you not how men have been over extending kindness to a woman yet, they did not know? The fact that you learnt to beat the system today does not mean that you won't fall tomorrow.

Yes balance is key. Also let go of people who don't choose you. You can't give your way into someone's heart. Let them go. Someone who values you will find you and won't take you for granted

Btw those girls attracted to bad boys are not the kinds of girls you want anyway. They are attracted to toxic behaviors because of their own issues they haven't dealt with

Dpsychologist:
There is something I have observed over the years, and I would like to hear other people's opinions on it.

Many men seem to end up in one of two extremes.

If you are the confident, unpredictable and "bad boy" type, many women appear to enjoy the excitement you bring. They overlook your flaws, forgive your mistakes more easily and sometimes even compete for your attention. You become someone they want to chase, even when your actions do not always deserve it.

On the other hand, if you are the dependable, respectful and genuinely kind man, life can take a completely different turn. Instead of being appreciated, your kindness is sometimes mistaken for weakness. Your generosity becomes an expectation insteadTitle: As a Man, You Are Either the Exciting Guy or the Useful Guy. Why Is There Rarely a Balance?

There is something I have observed over the years, and I would like to hear other people's opinions on it.

Many men seem to end up in one of two extremes.

If you are the confident, unpredictable and "bad boy" type, many women appear to enjoy the excitement you bring. They overlook your flaws, forgive your mistakes more easily and sometimes even compete for your attention. You become someone they want to chase, even when your actions do not always deserve it.

On the other hand, if you are the dependable, respectful and genuinely kind man, life can take a completely different turn. Instead of being appreciated, your kindness is sometimes mistaken for weakness. Your generosity becomes an expectation instead of something valued. Your time, your emotional support and your money slowly become things people feel entitled to rather than grateful for.

Many good men have discovered that the more they give without setting boundaries, the more they are expected to give. The relationship gradually becomes less about mutual love and more about what they can provide. Once they stop providing, the treatment often changes almost immediately.

This raises an uncomfortable question.

Why does it sometimes seem easier to be desired as the exciting man than appreciated as the dependable man?

Personally, I do not think the solution is becoming toxic or pretending to be a bad boy. Neither do I believe men should become bitter or stop being kind.

The real solution is balance.

A man should be kind but never naive. He should be generous but not allow himself to be exploited. He should love deeply while still maintaining self respect. He should help willingly without becoming anyone's personal ATM.

Kindness without boundaries attracts exploitation. Confidence without character creates chaos. Healthy relationships require both love and mutual respect.

Perhaps the biggest lesson for men is this: never build your entire value around what you can provide financially. Build yourself into a man whose presence, character and principles are just as valuable as his wallet.

What do you think?

Do you agree that many men are either explored for excitement or exploited for provision, or do you see it differently? of something valued. Your time, your emotional support and your money slowly become things people feel entitled to rather than grateful for.

Many good men have discovered that the more they give without setting boundaries, the more they are expected to give. The relationship gradually becomes less about mutual love and more about what they can provide. Once they stop providing, the treatment often changes almost immediately.

This raises an uncomfortable question.

Why does it sometimes seem easier to be desired as the exciting man than appreciated as the dependable man?

Personally, I do not think the solution is becoming toxic or pretending to be a bad boy. Neither do I believe men should become bitter or stop being kind.

The real solution is balance.

A man should be kind but not naive. He should be generous but not allow himself to be exploited. He should love deeply while still maintaining self respect. He should help willingly without becoming everyone's personal ATM.

Kindness without boundaries attracts exploitation. Confidence without character creates chaos. Healthy relationships require both love and mutual respect.

Perhaps the biggest lesson for men is this: never build your entire value around what you can provide financially. Build yourself into a man whose presence, character and principles are just as valuable as his wallet.

What do you think?

Do you agree that many men are either explored for excitement or exploited for provision, or do you see it differently?

FayaBall:
Do you not how men have been over extending kindness to a woman yet, they did not know? The fact that you learnt to beat the system today does not mean that you won't fall tomorrow.

You are type of foolxish men, you are describing above.

Again, I insist, if you are extending goodness to whoever and he/she refuses to resprocating, you use your common sense to stop it and not indoctrination from your fellow man

Women hates what they claim to Love and love what they claim to hate


GBAM!👊


...I concur 🙌

Except if she's your sister, mom or feminine family.... When it comes to showing kindness towards vagynal genders always put the money behind your DEEQ.

LIVINGICONREBOR:
Nice post.

Gambling don chop uyi guobadia (guobe) brayne finish. I no sure say e go fit compose something like this without relying entirely on AI.🥱🥱

Too much repetition?

Fiscus105:
You are type of foolxish men, you are describing above.

Again, I insist, if you are extending goodness to whoever and he/she refuses to resprocating, you use your common sense to stop it and not indoctrination from your fellow man

You think you are the first? It would still happen again