₦airaland Forum

Orlandoo:
Lies and total bullshit. There are some people that if you like severe your head for them, they won't still be kind to you. A wicked soul is a wicked soul no matter what. It is in their blood. E be like you are still a kid sef

It's the person that severed his/her head for an ungrateful and unkind person is the biggest phul.

One super attribute not to miss

Words on marble!!

Kenmarine:
Above all dont overlook her family...

Yes man! Background matters a lot.

Some traits especially "Kindness" can't be determine base on how she treat you, but the best way to know is "how she treat others". This is applicable to men as well.

Hmmm this really got me
This kindness should be two-way thing.
In a relationship when it is one-way, the other person can feel used and taken for granted.
No matter how kind or good or nice u are, if the other party unrepentantly exploit your kindness, you will feel exhausted and reach your breaking point.
But let me tell you the reality about life that u may not know. Kind people always end up with wicked people. The later usually and purposefully scout out for the former unknowingly to them. Meanwhile kind people believe they have the large heart to accommodate everybody including wicked people. Little did they know that that would be their Achilles heel.
My advice is that if u know u have a kind personality which is very rare to have. Just know that it wont be easy for u to get another kind person in this world full of wicked people. Take your time no matter how long and ensure u dont settle down unless with a kind person like u or u dont get married at all.
Let wicked people behold themselves and kind people also behold themselves.

Just to add,kind-hearted people often have a strong tendency to forgive, accommodate and see the best in others, which can unfortunately make them vulnerable to people who take advantage of those qualities.kindness should be accompanied by discernment and boundaries, because having a good heart does not mean tolerating disrespect or exploitation. Ultimately, a kind person should take their time choosing a partner whose character, values and capacity for mutual care match their own.This has been a rule of thumb for me going forward

lailo:
Hmmm this really got me
This kindness should be two-way thing.
In a relationship when it is one-way, the other person can feel used and taken for granted.
No matter how kind or good or nice u are, if the other party unrepentantly exploit your kindness, you will feel exhausted and reach your breaking point.
But let me tell you the reality about life that u may not know. Kind people always end up with wicked people. The later usually and purposefully scout out for the former unknowingly to them. Meanwhile kind people believe they have the large heart to accommodate everybody including wicked people. Little did they know that that would be their Achilles heel.
My advice is that if u know u have a kind personality which is very rare to have. Just know that it wont be easy for u to get another kind person in this world full of wicked people. Take your time no matter how long and ensure u dont settle down unless with a kind person like u or u dont get married at all.
Let wicked people behold themselves and kind people also behold themselves.

Kindness is very very necessary

verminnel:
Just to add,kind-hearted people often have a strong tendency to forgive, accommodate and see the best in others, which can unfortunately make them vulnerable to people who take advantage of those qualities.kindness should be accompanied by discernment and boundaries, because having a good heart does not mean tolerating disrespect or exploitation. Ultimately, a kind person should take their time choosing a partner whose character, values and capacity for mutual care match their own.This has been a rule of thumb for me going forward

The most reasonable female I have ever seen in the recent time if actually u are a female as your profile indicates.

Bayoonanuga:
did Jesus Christ marry when he’s alive

The op never said you must marry.

He’s saying that should you finally decide to marry. Make sure you marry a girl who is specifically kind to you for who you are, and not for what you are.

Problem should be how to identify such girls?

Be kind to your spouse
But make sure u marry a kind one
if not YOU GO SEE SHEGE BANZA

EdiskyHarry:
Beautiful write up ❤️ ❤️..In addition, never marry all these women dancing on tiktok with no foresight

it's not all women that dance on Tictok that lack foresight na.

OnlineAmebo:
THE PROBLEM IS YOU NEVER KNOW WHO YOU MARRY UNTIL AFTER THE MARRIAGE

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PiVQGz8-H_Y?si=Q-hGHSUa5csXy0Bp

It shows even while dating unless you don't really pay attention, an unkind woman is easy to detect from her actions not from her words.

Belurved1:
How she treats others is how she will treat you in years to come.

If she treats you the way she treats others, then you're not different from others.

. It is an indication, an unkind woman can pretend to treat you well but bring out her nature yo others, once you see such run because it will get to you sooner than later that's basically what the dude is saying.

Dpsychologist:
Many men spend a lot of time looking for beauty, attraction, intelligence, financial compatibility, sexual chemistry and other qualities when choosing a wife. Those things matter, but there is one quality that I think deserves far more attention: kindness.

Marry a woman who is genuinely kind to you, not only when everything is going well, but especially when life becomes difficult. There will be seasons when you are broke, sick, exhausted, unemployed, confused, emotionally drained or dealing with responsibilities that you cannot explain to everyone. During those moments, you will discover the difference between someone who simply loves you when life is comfortable and someone who genuinely cares about your wellbeing.

A kind partner does not always wait until you are completely broken before offering help. She notices when something is wrong. She sees that you are struggling and asks what she can do. Sometimes she may not have much to offer, but she still tries to make things a little easier.

Marriage should not feel like a courtroom where every act of kindness requires an application.

“You didn't ask me.”
“You didn't tell me.”
“Is it my problem?”

Technically, a person can make these arguments, but marriage should involve enough empathy to recognise that the person beside you may sometimes need help before they know how to ask for it.

There is also a major difference between having boundaries and deliberately watching your spouse struggle just to prove a point. If your husband is going through a difficult financial period and you have the capacity to help, helping him should not become a battle of pride. If your wife is overwhelmed with responsibilities and you can take something off her plate, you should not need a formal request before doing it.

Kindness does not mean allowing yourself to be exploited. It means genuinely wanting the person you married to be okay.

Another quality men should pay attention to is discretion.

Marry someone who understands that not everything that happens inside a marriage belongs on social media.

Your spouse will eventually become vulnerable around you. You will see their failures, embarrassing moments, financial problems, family issues, insecurities and weaknesses. There will be disagreements that neither of you will handle perfectly.

Some of those things should remain private.

There is a difference between seeking help because you are experiencing abuse or dealing with a serious marital problem and deliberately turning your spouse's private struggles into entertainment for strangers.

Be very careful about marrying someone who cannot keep anything private. Today, it may be a disagreement about money. Tomorrow, it may be an argument you had at home.

Eventually, your most vulnerable moment could become a WhatsApp status, Facebook post or gossip among people who have never met you.

You need a partner who can still protect your dignity even when she is angry with you.

The same principle applies to men. Women should also look for husbands who are kind, empathetic and discreet. Marriage cannot survive on one person's kindness while the other person constantly takes advantage of it.

Beauty will eventually become familiar. Money can disappear. Attraction can fluctuate. Careers can change. Circumstances can become completely different from what you expected when you first met.

Character becomes much more important when the excitement fades and real life begins.

When you lose your job, become sick, experience financial difficulties or simply go through a season when you are not at your best, you will discover what kind of person you actually married.

You don't want someone who watches you struggle simply because you did not ask. You want someone who notices. You want someone who cares. You want someone who can say, “I can see that you are struggling. Let me help.”

Most importantly, you want someone who can help you without later using your vulnerable moment as ammunition against you.

When choosing a spouse, look beyond the person who makes your heart beat faster.

Pay attention to the person who makes you feel safe when life becomes difficult. Marry kindness. Marry empathy. Marry discretion. Marry character.

Those qualities become priceless when the beautiful and exciting parts of marriage meet real life.

Cc nlfpmod seun Dominique farano

Women dey change o

When you dont have money ,..you wil see their true kindness

Belurved1:
How she treats others is how she will treat you in years to come.

If she treats you the way she treats others, then you're not different from others.

No man is different from another man. A disrespectful woman who sees no problem disrespecting and insulting people out there will ultimately start disrespecting and insulting you one day.
Your own will be even worse because u share same roof with her.

You may think you are different because she claims she loves you, but wait till everything calms down and u enter marriage proper. You will know that she was only sparing u for the time being.

femi4:
Women dey change o

When you dont have money ,..you wil see their true kindness

Omo, men don see shege ooooo.

Choose your hell wisely