₦airaland Forum

This is a counter thread to this post:
7 Types Of Guys Women Can't
Resist- You Agree? by
BANGERLEE1(m): 6:43pm On Oct 04

I hope this post will enlighten the ladies a little while it won't upset the guys as much as I can't imagine. I was upset myself when I see this article but decided to share it for the good of all.


***************START**************

Sisters of Resistance and our wider
network of female friends have been
disappointed with the types of men
who, we discovered, fit into the below
categories. In this article, we
describe their dominating and
emotionally manipulative behaviour
and outline their likes, dislikes,
characteristics, skills and phrases so
that you can easily identify and avoid
them.

However, this list is not exhaustive —
there are many more dangerous
types of men, including combinations
of the below. With this in mind, SoR
presents:

1. The Player / Pick Up Artist
2. The Narcissist / Abuser
3. The Peter Pan Man
4. The Gangsta
5. The Alpha Male



1. The Player or Pick Up Artist

DESCRIPTION

The player is smooth, charming and
the epitome of a ladies’ man. He
seems to have a knack for knowing
just what to say and when to say it,
often making you wonder whether or
not he is too good to be true. If you
wonder this, trust your gut — this is
likely the case.

•LIKES Himself, Women, Intimacy,
Being the Object of Attention/Desire

•DISLIKES Facebook (Baitbook),
Being Caught Playing

IDENTIFYING CHARACTERISTICS

Often has (or talks about having)
expensive/fast cars, mentions houses,
holidays, music videos, new jobs/
business ideas that never seem to
appear. Special attention paid to
how he dresses/looks/smells, etc.
Funny, witty. Likely to be the one to
ramp up the intensity of the
relationship first but will never be the
one to bring up relationship-related
topics.

SPECIAL SKILLS

•Flirting – a.k.a. Game. Includes
sweet-talking, teasing, winding or
buttering you up. Works hard to
convince you he is your dream come
true. Depending on his lifestyle he
may be better at this via text/e-mail/
phone than in person.

•Quasi-listening – May appear to be a
patient listener but rarely responds
in depth to anything you say. Changes
the subject soon after you have
expressed your thoughts to
something that is more interesting to
him, or a topic over which he feels he
has more command and control.

•Sex – The Player is often abnormally
good in bed, and may even appear to
know how to read your body,
contributing to the illusion that you
are meant to be together. If you
encounter someone with these
unusual skills, proceed with caution.

COMMON PHRASES

A. for himself: “God’s gift to
women,” an “artist” or “poet,” “The
Man”, uses $ in his name

B. for you/other women: darling,
babe, princess, sexy (see also: Lies of
Affection)

C. Other/General: “We can do
anything, go anywhere.” “Let me
know and I’ll make that happen.”

2. The Abuser / Narcissist

DESCRIPTION

The Abuser/Narcissist starts out
loving and charming but in time
begins to break down your
confidence, separates you from your
friends, and family, and becomes
emotionally or physically abusive.
They want their victim to be willing
to endure their abuse and to label
this willingness “love.” They are
extremely possessive, jealous, and
controlling and will go to any lengths
to prevent you from ending the
relationship. They will blame you for
all of this behaviour.

•LIKES Himself (to the point of
obsession). Willing obedience.
Apologies. Fear and control.

•DISLIKES Being challenged or
corrected. Your independent thought.
Your girl friends.

IDENTIFYING CHARACTERISTICS

•Draws you in with a vibrant
personality – may sing, tell stories or
jokes, or otherwise make you laugh.
May go to the gym and be obsessed
with his appearance. May surprise
you with sudden defensiveness or
aggressive outbursts. Will
passionately insist that he is making a
special effort for you over basic
interactions, e.g. calling you, coming
round for a visit, texting you back. If
the words “headfuck” and
“crazymaking” come to mind, you are
probably dealing with a Narcissist
Abuser. He wants to drive you
“crazy” to replace your
understanding of reality with his, in
which he is the centre, so that he may
continue his abuse.

SPECIAL SKILLS

•Mind control & Altering reality – The
Narcissist Abuser has the ability to
radically change your understanding
of the circumstances or an argument.
For example, he will be abusive to
you and reframe the situation so he is
the victim. He will often alternate
between abusive language, vicious
attacks on you and your personality,
and Lies of Affection and Lies in the
Future, disorienting and confusing
you, and replacing your thoughts with
the false realities he has
constructed. His aim with this tactic
is to mould you into a submissive and
fearful but still loving and
affectionate object of his control.

•Getting you to love them / stay with
them / go back to them – The
Narcissist knows how to convince you
that he loves you, but make no
mistake – everything he does/says is
for the benefit of his own massive
ego. He will break down your
confidence so that you feel you
deserve no better than how he is
treating you. As he is likely to
become violent towards you, you are
in danger when around him. SoR
advises complete and immediate
separation from men who exhibit this
type of behaviour. We are not
experts, we are just women who have
experienced these kinds of
relationships in the past.

COMMON PHRASES

A. No one understands me / I feel my
life’s got a special purpose (or other
phrases that convey that they think of
themselves as unique, misunderstood,
and that the problems in their lives
arise from others and not them)

B. Look how I came to see you / Look
how I called you / texted you back (or
other phrases that make small basic
gestures seem like he’s gone out of
his way for you when he hasn’t)

C. Why do you always make me so
angry? / I wish you didn’t make me so
upset /make me get me like this /You
always… (and then blames you for his
anger management issues)

D. I want to get better/ You can make
me a better person (It’s not your
responsibility to stay in relationships
with abusive men. You can’t make
them better, only they can make that
change.)

3. The Peter Pan Man (aka Immature, Little Boys, Never Grown Up)

DESCRIPTION

The Peter Pan Man has not grown up.
He is not emotionally or intellectually
mature enough to sustain any type of
long-term adult relationship. You may
be excited by his enthusiasm and zest
for life; however, his general
immaturity, indecisiveness, lack of
critical thinking or life skills,
dependency on his friends’ opinions,
and prioritisation of his “hobbies” or
media addictions over human
interaction will eventually sabotage
any relationship.

•LIKES Comic books, video games,
porn, hanging out with his friends,
“satirical” animated comedy series,
sports, group think

•DISLIKES Responsibility, decisions,
simple requests

IDENTIFYING CHARACTERISTICS

Living at home/moved in with you,
does not pay his own rent, no stable
source of income, easily hired/fired,
spending most of his day on hobbies
such as: poker, video games,
skateboarding, ballin, chillin with the
boys. Suddenly cancels his own plans
and calls it spontaneity. Uses any
number of avoidance tactics re:
consequences or challenging
conversations but has no filter for his
own thoughts (verbal diarrhea). Will
not allow you to end the relationship
or the discussion on your own terms;
always wants the last word.

SPECIAL SKILLS

Making you laugh. A carefree/
spontaneous attitude to life – The
Peter Pan Man has a youthful sense
of play and fun. He may have jokes,
be good at accents or impressions, or
like to rap. He may try to impress you
by initially including hanging out with
you in his daily schedule of fun
things, or by offering to do or make
things with you, but is often too lazy
and immature to complete his plans.

COMMON PHRASES

A. “My mum’s my best friend”
B. “I’ve spoken to my boys about
this and they said…”

C. “Do we have to talk about this
now?” / “Can’t it wait till later?”

D. “Why do we have to be so
serious all the time?” / “Can’t we just
have a chilled out conversation?”

4. The Gangsta

DESCRIPTION

The gangsta has a hectic life. Thus,
he can be emotionally distant,
aggressive, abusive, dishonest, and
dominating to those around him. Any
interaction with him will be at his
whim or according to his schedule.
Yet instead of being frustrated by
this, you may feel strangely special
when he is able to fit you into his
busy life. SoR acknowledge that his
behaviours are a direct result of the
system that we are also fighting to
overthrow. However, we have found
it extremely difficult to establish
healthy romantic relationships with
him.

•LIKES Good girls. Cars. Expensive
things. Being/staying out late.
Parties/raves. People he can control.

•DISLIKES Intimacy. Honesty.
Questions. Snitches. Police. The
Government. The Man. The System.
(As you might imagine, the latter half
of these dislikes are some of the
reasons for SoRs’ former alignment
with Gangstas).

IDENTIFYING CHARACTERISTICS

Street credibility. Difficult to make
plans with or otherwise pin down.
Good at avoiding intimacy and never
exposing vulnerability. Relies on
material possessions and notorious
accomplishments for reputation. May
typically wear precious metals and/or
have interest in high fashion/
expensive brands. May often be seen
with wads of cash, nice car, tattoos.
May spend exorbitant amounts on
expensive drinks, such as champagne
and name brand alcohols. Gangsta/
rough sex.

SPECIAL SKILLS

•Defending himself and his friends –
The Gangsta is the top dog for a
reason. His power and initial charm
may make him attractive to you. But
this aggression will undoubtedly seep
into any intimate relationship.

•Situational Management – There is a
never a situation the Gangsta cannot
handle. You may be impressed by the
way he is able to deal with change,
make decisions and have those
around him carry them out. Good at
thinking on his feet.

•Entrepreneurial Abilities – Good at
mental maths, building networks,
establishing product/market fit,
negotiating supply and demand and
keeping critical information under
wraps.

•Interpersonal Skills – The Gangsta is
able to maintain the undying respect,
loyalty, and dedication of those
around him. This is done through a
combination of emotionally
manipulative and fear-inducing
tactics he has been taught by OGs
before him. You may be frustrated
with his inability to say anything
really nice to you but nevertheless
still be taken in by his gangsta game.
Learning to identify and take note of
these tactics when they are utilised is
a primary way you can begin to
untangle yourself from their grasp.

•Opportunistic But Unrealistic
Scheduling Habits: chaotic day-to-day
activities that are often subject to
change, including to-dos associated
with “picking up,” “dropping off,”
“handling business,” etc.

•Alternate Timetable: SoR has found
that Gangstas operate on a “stated
time x 3=actual time” principle,
where “I’m 5 mins away” means he
will arrive in at least 15 min and “I’ll
be there in 15” means approximately
45 min. The formula does not apply to
“I’ll be there in an hour/few hours –
just doing 1 thing” – this means you
likely won’t see them at all on that
particular occasion.

•Deflecting Responsibility – Rarely
accepts that he is to blame for
anything. Makes frequent and skillful
use of Exceptional Circumstance Lies.

COMMON PHRASES

A. You know what it is

B. I’m out here/I’m a hustla

C. My life’s a struggle

D. Silence or lack of detail
regarding personal or work related
issues

5. The Alpha Male

DESCRIPTION

The Alpha Male has developed many
of the Special Skills described above.
He is often intelligent, able to
confidently discuss a wide range of
issues and may be capable of critical
thinking. For these reasons, he is a
leader amongst his male friends and
is respected by colleagues and family
members. He is therefore not used to
being challenged or disagreed with.
He will always aim to maintain
control of every aspect of your
relationship, including frequency and
length of visits and telephone
interactions. He is mainly motivated
by self-interest and is not a team
player.

LIKES Being in Control, Being
Waited On, Being Waited For, Being
the Centre of Attention

DISLIKES Being Wrong, Being out
of control, Being questioned, Any
Challenge or Disagreement

IDENTIFYING CHARACTERISTICS

•Pride. Confidence/swagger. Is a
taker, not a giver. Never backs down.

•Appearance-centric. Recipient of
frequent phone calls from others
asking for advice. Like the Gangsta,
he avoids intimacy and is rarely
honest and open with his feelings. In
conflict situations, in contrast to the
aggression of a Narcissist/Abuser, an
Alpha Male will often simply ignore
and/or avoid you if he suspects you
are angry. He may then initiate
contact on his terms when he
assumes you have calmed down.
Marks his territory by leaving
clothing and accessories (shoes,
jackets, sunglasses) at yours so he
always has a reason to return. Will
regularly cancel plans with friends,
family, and lovers at a moment’s
notice. Like the Peter Pan Man, he
calls this behaviour spontaneous, but
is in fact insensitive and
inconsiderate of those around him.

SPECIAL SKILLS

Same interpersonal and situational
management skills as The Gangsta.
Has some of the mind control skills of
the Narcissist/Abuser. Like the
Player, he is very likely to be
extremely good in bed.

COMMON PHRASES

A. Nobody can tell me what to do /
I’m my own man

B. I’m not ready/too selfish to be
in a relationship

C. I’m not a relationship kind of
guy


*****DISCLAIMER*****

We are not saying that all men can be
placed into one of these categories.
We also do not claim that these
descriptions are infallible. We speak
only from our experience with types
of men we have encountered in a
combined 26+ year dating history.

We have discussed doing a corollary
article about the behaviours of
respectful, loving, compassionate
men, but upon reflection, we realised
that although there are some men
who display these types of
characteristics, we have not
encountered enough of them to
create another article with the
richness and depth of insight found
above. We are however, in the
process of creating a response to the
numerous requests we have received
for “guidelines” or an article detailing
SoR’s expectations for appropriate
behaviour in contrast to the
disappointing experiences detailed
here.






****************END******************

6) The very Good bad Guy

This kind of guys are commonly known as the under cover guys, they play hard, work hard,

LIKES; football, chilling with friends, playing Xbox.

DISLIKE: gf calling him everyday na wahala be dat, gf giving suprises and snooping on him, gf Asking a lot about his ex.

IDENTIFYING CHARACTERISTIC
He doesn't talk too much, his face always look cool and hansome, he doesn't do a lot of chatting conversation, Lowkey type of guy, Ghostmode attitude, but is a very good bad guy....

*Appearance-centric: he cares a lot about people around him but pple thinks he doesn't give a Bleep. He pretend to be bad but his kind.

SPECIAL SKILL
GHOSTmode type, good cook, free thinker, always busy type doing nothing, a pretender

COMMON PHRASES
I don't want wahala.

Politics is not my game

Life is all about a risk

Money must be made

Who care's (but he cares)

My past is who I am

@op nice one but thank me later but wait amadioha do the needful.

godofwar666:
6) The very Good bad Guy

This kind of guys are commonly known as the under cover guys, they play hard, work hard,

LIKES; football, chilling with friends, playing Xbox.

DISLIKE: gf calling him everyday na wahala be dat, gf giving suprises and snooping on him, gf Asking a lot about his ex.

IDENTIFYING CHARACTERISTIC
He doesn't talk too much, his face always look cool and hansome, he doesn't do a lot of chatting conversation, Lowkey type of guy, Ghostmode attitude, but is a very good bad guy....

*Appearance-centric: he cares a lot about people around him but pple thinks he doesn't give a Bleep. He pretend to be bad but his kind.

SPECIAL SKILL
GHOSTmode type, good cook, free thinker, always busy type doing nothing, a pretender

COMMON PHRASES
I don't want wahala.

Politics is not my game

Life is all about a risk

Money must be made

Who care's (but he cares)

My past is who I am

@op nice one but thank me later but wait amadioha do the needful.

I have to commend you for putting this together. **clapping**
(Moderators: Rocktation, farano,
pasqal09 and Oga Seun ) do the needful

expecting a counter thread

I don't know if you put this together on your own or pulled it from somewhere but this is definitely a good write up for girls and boys alike and deserves to be on the front page.

well.... which one is the best? #always looking for d best in everything

DONYUK:
well.... which one is the best? #always looking for d best in everything

You can decide for yourself I suppose.

hmmm...with such lists,your forced to hope your wife will b sent from heaven on d wedding day.

philantoxx:
hmmm...with such lists,your forced to hope your wife will b sent from heaven on d wedding day.

I wonder ooooo

Oh my God !..the first describes somebody I know in no small detail but he's no player thou

+

That number six of that guy thou...I know a guy in that category too

=
The hybrid ME

Crocz:
Oh my God !..the first describes somebody I know in no small detail but he's no player thou

+

That number six of that guy thou...I know a guy in that category too

=
The hybrid ME

Do you mean that number 6 describes u?

msmon:
Do you mean that number 6 describes u?

Haha...just trying to synthesis the good aspect of both

chikeezy:
I don't know if you put this together on your own or pulled it from somewhere but this is definitely a good write up for girls and boys alike and deserves to be on the front page.

It was culled from a website! I ought to summarize but I decided to pull everything for future reference coz it's a fantastic write up like u said. I made sure I read every details.

If any woman wants to use this as a checklist, she should just marry her Love Machine and get it over with.

If any woman wants to use this as a checklist, she should just marry her Love Machine and get it over with.

lolz