₦airaland Forum

SirShymex:
The body, Bruv. She has the best body I have seen thus far on this forum. Her batty is cray! But I don't rate her face that much.

Who are the top rated on ya list? The chics on this forum are mostly rubbish.

Looool I knew you'd say that indeed!! her body is smoking, that batty mesmerised many.

I've seen a few stunning chics on NL I can't recall their monikers now but there's always the possibility they're not using their real pic.

NL is disappointing I must say,

coogar:
how did you see her bum?

I saw it on NL during the Miss NL thingy, just like everyone else. And couldn't help but notice what she is packing lol.

50calibre:
Looool I knew you'd say that indeed!! her body is smoking, that batty mesmerised many.

I've seen a few stunning chics on NL I can't recall their monikers now but there's always the possibility they're not using their real pic.

NL is disappointing I must say,

Most of them are fake pics, trust me. Don't get catfished lool. I detect fake pics faster than lucifer lool.

That is why I don't take NL seriously, man. The chics aren't inspiring at all.

Er, soulglo, what's up?

You still owe me lol

SirShymex:
Who? You mean the biitch suffering from acute depression, with five identities, three handles, and from five different countries? Please keep that stalkerish loony off my mentions.

Anyway, I need to rub some baby oil on ya laps soon lol.

Lol you are too harsh . Anyways while you at it a massage would be nice

Subom1:
Lol you are too harsh . Anyways while you at it a massage would be nice

Er, before the massage, you need to certify that you're for real with a proper pic

I can't get cafished!

SirShymex:
Er, before the massage, you need to certify that you're for real with a proper pic

I can't get cafished!

lol am not putting up my pic on Nairaland and trust me...This is no catfish ish

Subom1:
lol am not putting up my pic on Nairaland and trust me...This is no catfish ish

Send me a PM then.

Will check it on there.

Mr Coogar,pls can i have your email,very important,thanks.

coogar:
so you actually expect an intelligent boy like me to carry a virgin CV into the software tech industry that is as porous as anything? no wonder you struggle to get jobs. you really think all those asians have the 8-year experience their CV says?

and yes....
that was my first job as a tester. i defended my CV to the T with verifiable references. i always had my friend on BBM whenever i ran into a brick wall & he bailed me out. within about 2 weeks, i met 3 other nigerians in my circle & the rest is history.

siddon there make boxers dey wear you.
the last dude i did phone interview for had only be in the UK for few months. he got the role (£350/day - 6 months contract). no prior knowledge, no experience, he didn't even have ISEB certificate. if you want a job, holla @ me.



sharrrap & stop talking like an amateur.
there are software testers that are on £500/day - different companies, different rates. you need to know how this industry works. what you see on jobserve are agent rates, they are very negotiable.

i always tell them what my last rate was in the previous job & i will not go below it. it's a take it or leave it matter. sometimes they call back, sometimes they don't. i can show you plenty of examples in my email right now of various job offers that even come with awoof £300 if i recommend an employee for them.

Coogar i'm coming to treat your Bleep up just wait for a while i know you are still in bed

coogar:
so you actually expect an intelligent boy like me to carry a virgin CV into the software tech industry that is as porous as anything? no wonder you struggle to get jobs. you really think all those asians have the 8-year experience their CV says?

and yes....
that was my first job as a tester. i defended my CV to the T with verifiable references. i always had my friend on BBM whenever i ran into a brick wall & he bailed me out. within about 2 weeks, i met 3 other nigerians in my circle & the rest is history.

siddon there make boxers dey wear you.
the last dude i did phone interview for had only be in the UK for few months. he got the role (£350/day - 6 months contract). no prior knowledge, no experience, he didn't even have ISEB certificate. if you want a job, holla @ me.



sharrrap & stop talking like an amateur.
there are software testers that are on £500/day - different companies, different rates. you need to know how this industry works. what you see on jobserve are agent rates, they are very negotiable.

i always tell them what my last rate was in the previous job & i will not go below it. it's a take it or leave it matter. sometimes they call back, sometimes they don't. i can show you plenty of examples in my email right now of various job offers that even come with awoof £300 if i recommend an employee for them.

Seriously, I will give it you you are very intelligent as per football matters and you are very gifted in making whole lot of bullshyte look nice.

You are a cowboy and obviously you were coached but you weren't briefed about cowboys' rules of engagement. Most of the people that earn that much don't even talk about which brings me to the conclusion that you are still a searching rookie.

Forget about asians they are all patel!

You also said you did interview for someone and he got a 350 a day job...really if the dunce can't do phone interview, how will he do face-to-face? you don't want to tell me its just phone interview to land 350 a day job. Coogs please dont bullshiit the bullshiiter!

Forget about getting me a job, you can't do in this life or the next. I'm your master!

If at all you are even a contractor, how were you paid? please dont say paye

wonlasewonimi:
Seriously, I will give it you you are very intelligent as per football matters and you are very gifted in making whole lot of bullshyte look nice.

you are an idïot!

You are a cowboy and obviously you were coached but you weren't briefed about cowboys' rules of engagement. Most of the people that earn that much don't even talk about which brings me to the conclusion that you are still a searching rookie.
Forget about asians they are all patel!

this is another evidence to call you an idïot! most? is it that you have never seen good money in your life or you constantly dine with poverty? what's there to hide in someone's wages? what's the big deal here? most of the people you know don't talk about their wages because you know them - do you know me?

what a twït!!!

You also said you did interview for someone and he got a 350 a day job...really if the dunce can't do phone interview, how will he do face-to-face? you don't want to tell me its just phone interview to land 350 a day job. Coogs please dont bullshiit the bullshiiter!

that's exactly the point!
he was not too sure he would get past the first stage of the interview(phone interview conducted by the agent) so he came to me so that he can at least get to do face to face interview.

i tutored him for few days - interviews are all about defending the CV you are presenting. the questions come from your CV unless you are being spiritually followed by your father's mistress. lo & behold, he got hired......he even bought me a nice winter jacket to boot to show his appreciation.

Forget about getting me a job, you can't do in this life or the next. I'm your master!
If at all you are even a contractor, how were you paid? please dont say paye

you are a dolt!
send me an email if you want a job. i don't have your time(díck-waving) contest. how's a contractor paid? really? they are paid in church.....very soon you would ask me to print my payslip so you can be sure.

SirShymex:
Send me a PM then.

Will check it on there.

Lol I dunno if I can trust you. I remember what happened to mzdarkskin. No thanks

ROTFLMAO coogar. Let me leave you to bask in your delusion. I don't want to block all your pussiies on NL. Enjoy your £500/day testing jobs.

wonlasewonimi:
ROTFLMAO coogar. Let me leave you to bask in your delusion. I don't want to block all your pussiies on NL. Enjoy your £500/day testing jobs.

buhahahaha
after getting murked, this is all you got. i am sure you're going to visit your friends tonight - they have been lying to you that the market is bad & thus no freebies for you.

your mates are in that industry earning £1,000 per day & you are whining over £350/day. wonlash, go and rewrite your CV & find someone that will tutor you on how to ace interviews.

coogar:
buhahahaha
after getting murked, this is all you got. i am sure you're going to visit your friends tonight - they have been lying to you that the market is bad & thus no freebies for you.

your mates are in that industry earning £1,000 per day & you are whining over £350/day. wonlash, go and rewrite your CV & find someone that will tutor you on how to ace interviews.

Guy, trust me if I tell you what I know you will deactivate this account. If I tell you I have unlimited access to your tax returns in hmrc in the last 15 years nko. Please don't let me do this.

wonlasewonimi:
Guy, trust me if I tell you what I know you will deactivate this account. If I tell you I have unlimited access to your tax returns in hmrc in the last 15 years nko. Please don't let me do this.

please do it......
lemme know how much you rogues have been stealing from me with your complex tax codes. bunch of rogues!

Subom1:
Lol I dunno if I can trust you. I remember what happened to mzdarkskin. No thanks

C'mon now, I'm a G - and it is loyalty above all things with me. That is code and I will never do that even if the Feds were to threaten me, or we have disagreements. I don't roll like that. Have you ever seen me post anyone's pic of NL, even at the height of people blackmailing me? I just laughed it off, continued with my NL life and remained a real G. That comes with the territory and snitching is a sin where I'm from.

MzD messed with a known troll from Somalia, and got done in. When you mess with real G's, it is death before dishonour, u get me?

coogar:
please do it......
lemme know how much you rogues have been stealing from me with your complex tax codes. bunch of rogues!

You just shot yourself in the foot mate. Aren't you supposed to be contracting. Bro, let's just forget this ish.. You are still one of the best ashewos here.

wonlasewonimi:
You just shot yourself in the foot mate. Aren't you supposed to be contracting. Bro, let's just forget this ish.. You are still one of the best ashewos here.

so as a contractor, i don't pay corporation tax? i am not even sure you know how these things work.......

coogar:
so as a contractor, i don't pay corporation tax? i am not even sure you know how these things work.......

stop bluffing aburo....you don't earn anything that will put you in the threshold of complex corporate tax calculations. Abi you don dey make £300,000 per year now. Wo, go and sit down jare. If you wan bragggado make you dey look face

I was here.

wonlasewonimi:
stop bluffing aburo....you don't earn anything that will put you in the threshold of complex corporate tax calculations. Abi you don dey make £300,000 per year now. Wo, go and sit down jare. If you wan bragggado make you dey look face

so one has to earn anything close to £300k pa to pay corporation tax? at this juncture, i doubt you have ever been to school sef.

when you are tired of working the shelves at tesco express, holla @ me. without derailing from the track that brought you here.....is it possible to earn £500/day as a tester without prior experience? yes it is!

you admitted that yourself when you used the cowboy term!

@Coogar, wonlasewonimi, and sagamite

I've been following the debate since yesterday, and I just didn't want to jump in because I don't know much about the Software testing market. But I do know a lot of naija and Asian folks are in it heavy. Also, it seems it's like one of the easiest fields to get into in the IT world, to earn something decent, without necessarily having a background in the field.

Anyway, I'll like to know why contractors earn far more than those on permanent wages, and rightfully so. I know Junior Testers don't earn more than £24,000 pa max. And Senior Testers should be around £40,000 pa. Is it because the contract can be terminated if the company isn't satisfied with the services rendered? And are there guarantees on such contracts?

coogar:
so one has to earn anything close to £300k pa to pay corporation tax? at this juncture, i doubt you have ever been to school sef.

when you are tired of working the shelves at tesco express, holla @ me. without derailing from the track that brought you here.....is it possible to earn £500/day as a tester without prior experience? yes it is!

you admitted that yourself when you used the cowboy term!

Bobo yii you are digging a hole for yourself here. Ok listen let me teach you something today.. I never said you won't pay corporation tax but it's not complex mate it's just 20% per annum it gets complex when your financial year straddles 2 accounting periods and you earn above £300k P.A.

Na you no go school, heck I even know the school you went to..case for another day.

You can get £500/day as tester but you, my friend haven't earned that in this life but no one knows tomorrow.

SirShymex:
@Coogar, wonlasewonimi, and sagamite

I've been following the debate since yesterday, and I just didn't want to jump in because I don't know much about the Software testing market. But I do know a lot of naija and Asian folks are in it heavy. Also, it seems it's like one of the easiest fields to get into in the IT world, to earn something decent, without necessarily having a background in the field.

Anyway, I'll like to know why contractors earn far more than those on permanent wages, and rightfully so. I know Junior Testers don't earn more than £24,000 pa max. And Senior Testers should be around £40,000 pa. Is it because the contract can be terminated if the company isn't satisfied with the services rendered? And are there guarantees on such contracts?

it's because they are contract jobs. most jobs won't overlap & as there are always gaps in between. something has to be tidying you up while you are out of job & expecting the next one.

besides, the rates quoted are before tax. contractors are self-employed. so you are given the responsibility of paying your taxes yourself(through your own accountant), NI contributions, pension, etc. so the take home pay is lower than what you see.

wonlasewonimi:
Bobo yii you are digging a hole for yourself here. Ok listen let me teach you something today.. I never said you won't pay corporation tax but it's not complex mate it's just 20% per annum it gets complex when your financial year straddles 2 accounting periods and you earn above £300k P.A.

so you now agree contractors pay corporation tax contrary to the bullshyte you spewed earlier on like i just fabricated the term from nowhere. i never said corporation tax on its own are complex or whatever nonsense you are spewing - i am saying all the taxes attached to setting up a company to be a contractor is very complex.

i go through this ambiguity with my accountant every year.

Na you no go school, heck I even know the school you went to..case for another day.

which school is that? iree poly?

You can get £500/day as tester but you, my friend haven't earned that in this life but no one knows tomorrow.

so you agree testers can get £500/day now but you just cannot see how coogar can get it?


we are getting somewhere.

coogar:
it's because they are contract jobs. most jobs won't overlap & as there are always gaps in between. something has to be tidying you up while you are out of job & expecting the next one.

besides, the rates quoted are before tax. contractors are self-employed. so you are given the responsibility of paying your taxes yourself(through your own accountant), NI contributions, pension, etc. so the take home pay is lower than what you see.

Thanks. I get it now.

I understand the second bit and I've a little company I run as well.

coogar:
it's because they are contract jobs. most jobs won't overlap & as there are always gaps in between. something has to be tidying you up while you are out of job & expecting the next one.

besides, the rates quoted are before tax. contractors are self-employed. so you are given the responsibility of paying your taxes yourself(through your own accountant), NI contributions, pension, etc. so the take home pay is lower than what you see.




so you now agree contractors pay corporation tax contrary to the bullshyte you spewed earlier on like i just fabricated the term from nowhere. i never said corporation tax on its own are complex or whatever nonsense you are spewing - i am saying all the taxes attached to setting up a company to be a contractor is very complex.

i go through this ambiguity with my accountant every year.




which school is that? iree poly?



so you agree testers can get £500/day now but you just cannot see how coogar can get it?


we are getting somewhere.

You are a layman. What is so complex in calculating 20% of your earning after deduction of allowable expenses. I never said you don't pay Corp tax...you mentioned complex tax code that term there gave you out.

You get accountant lmao this guy is baba suwe

Coogar continue sweet talking Oloshos on this NL. You were/are not a Tester! Take it from me. I'm a custodian of HMRC returns

Shymex he has answered you jare. I'm typing this behind tesco shelves

wonlasewonimi:
You are a layman. What is so complex in calculating 20% of your earning after deduction of allowable expenses. I never said you don't pay Corp tax...you mentioned complex tax code that term there gave you out.

complex tax code on all the taxables - you are so useless with comprehension. how can a singular entity like corporation tax even be misconstrued as complex....you be serious olodo.

You get accountant lmao this guy is baba suwe

who doesn't?
will inland revenue not need a report on what has been going on in the company that was set up? what constitutes personal expenses & company expenses? that isn't complex for you - the number of things you must lie about to pay the least possible tax isn't complex?

you are a school drop-out!

Coogar continue sweet talking Oloshos on this NL. You were/are not a Tester! Take it from me. I'm a custodian of HMRC returns

i doubt it....
you work the shelves at tesco or iceland. who would allow a doofus like yourself at HMRC.....unless you are mopping the floors there. which of the offices are you - at least i know a chic @ HMRC who would smoke you out right this minute..

over to you, wonlash.....
then again, where are you getting this vibe that everybody is a chronic womaniser like you? are you sure you don't have the wrong identity? abeg - my partner visits this forum, i wouldn't want your ilk to poison her mind with your balderdash....

SirShymex:
@Coogar, wonlasewonimi, and sagamite

I've been following the debate since yesterday, and I just didn't want to jump in because I don't know much about the Software testing market. But I do know a lot of naija and Asian folks are in it heavy. Also, it seems it's like one of the easiest fields to get into in the IT world, to earn something decent, without necessarily having a background in the field.

Anyway, I'll like to know why contractors earn far more than those on permanent wages, and rightfully so. I know Junior Testers don't earn more than £24,000 pa max. And Senior Testers should be around £40,000 pa. Is it because the contract can be terminated if the company isn't satisfied with the services rendered? And are there guarantees on such contracts?

Contractors earn far more because they operate under hgher employment risk than a permanent staff and they actually cost less overall.

A contractor is a flexible resource that can be let go at short notice by a firm. Most times, the company needs give less than one month notice even if the contractor still has longer than that on their contract.

A permanent staff is far harder to let go. The organization would have to make redundancy pay and follow processes well aligned to labour laws. These are time consuming and can cost depending on the years of service.

Hence the high daily contracting rate factors this risk of unemployment into the pay attractiveness. Most contractors work about 8 months a year (working days only, not weekends), some are lucky to do like 11 months. The high contract rate is partly to cover for the risk of gaps in employment of between 1 month to 6 months.

Also, the contractor might have rare specialist skills. Skills only needed for a short while, not a permanent basis. Specialist/rare skills have a premium.

Another issue adding to the high pay is that contractors don't get any benefits like pension, car allowance, healthcare insurance, life insurance etc that companies provide for staff at their level. The high contracting pay is suppose to provide them with funds to get that privately. This for a permanent staff can be worth about another 15-20% of their basic salary.

Companies have to pay certain taxes and charges for permanent staff dependent on (or as a % of) their salary throughout the employment of this staff, e.g. National Insurance Contributions, maternity/paternity leave, PAYE. This can add another 20% (I think) to the cost to the employer annually. These taxes, and charges they do not need to pay for contractors.

Finally, companies deal with all the accounting responsibilities of their permanent staff. These cost money they pay Accounting firms for, as they are very complex (more complex, the more the staff works internationally). Contractors deal with this themselves privately and at their own cost.

These are the core of the reasons why contractors are paid far more. It is high paying, but normally cheaper on the long run for employers.

Contractors also benefit as they can structure/manipulate their accounting to ensure they pay very low tax. Typically, a contractor only pays about 15 to 25% tax from their pay (which is treated as revenue). And this is after claiming all their lunch and transportation costs as tax deductible (that is, a business expense they do not have to pay 15 to 25% tax for).

It is a win-win for firms and good/lucky contractors.

You know I said you make a lot of bullshyte look nice earlier. This one above is one of them, you have this unique skillset complex tax code on taxables... I have been laughing like a roasted Eid ram here

What's so complex on expenses must be wholly reasonable and exclusively incurred for the business...i don't know you to be less intelligent mate atleast in football.

Yeah I agree I'm a drop out atleast I don't tell porkies about my alma mater!

You want the post code to the hmrc office I work? baba suwe mode again lmao