₦airaland Forum

bukatyne:
OK then, do you care to share?

the last paragraph is the summary. A detailed explanation in in my diary, will try to sort it out for you maybe later

okotv:
the last paragraph is the summary. A detailed explanation in in my diary, will try to sort it out for you maybe later

Would like to read the details, don't want to assume anything

Take care and Good night.

bukatyne:
Would like to read the details, don't want to assume anything

Take care and Good night.

Mizmycoli's write-up on love has made me decide
to share why I locked up my heart to love for so
long. It all began in 2007, I spent the holidays at an
aunt's place and on that fateful day, I was caught by
the younger brother of a girl also staying in the flat
doing immoral things(mind you nothing like
Penetration, just body touching)as my hormones
had just started to develop. We were reported and
blamed, punished but the annoying thing about that
phase of my life as a young boy was how the whole
situation was heaped on me. I decided to start
snubbing females and that was helped by the fact
that I was attending a boys only boarding school.
When I graduated, I had been so locked up I didn't
even notice, I was cold to girls and treated them as
guys.
It all changed when I met a true female intellectual.
She took the better part of two months convincing
me to give love a chance. I finally succumbed but
met a terrible heartbreak. So severe was it that it
took two weeks for me to get over it. I will love one
day but for now, I have decided to forgo that
passion till am through with my academics and
trainings.

That is a more detailed explanation .

okotv:
Mizmycoli's write-up on love has made me decide
to share why I locked up my heart to love for so
long. It all began in 2007, I spent the holidays at an
aunt's place and on that fateful day, I was caught by
the younger brother of a girl also staying in the flat
doing immoral things(mind you nothing like
Penetration, just body touching)as my hormones
had just started to develop. We were reported and
blamed, punished but the annoying thing about that
phase of my life as a young boy was how the whole
situation was heaped on me. I decided to start
snubbing females and that was helped by the fact
that I was attending a boys only boarding school.
When I graduated, I had been so locked up I didn't
even notice, I was cold to girls and treated them as
guys.
It all changed when I met a true female intellectual.
She took the better part of two months convincing
me to give love a chance. I finally succumbed but
met a terrible heartbreak. So severe was it that it
took two weeks for me to get over it. I will love one
day but for now, I have decided to forgo that
passion till am through with my academics and
trainings.

That is a more detailed explanation .

OK then

I want to believe that the girl was the sis to the guy that's why things turned out that way... If it was your bro who caught you both, it would have been humiliating for the girl in question.

@Heartbreak, What caused it?

bukatyne:
OK then

I want to believe that the girl was the sis to the guy that's why things turned out that way... If it was your bro who caught you both, it would have been humiliating for the girl in question.

@Heartbreak, What caused it?

He was the brother. I decided to try again. Was deep into it but she wasn't cause she preferred another guy.

okotv:
decided to try again. Was deep into it but she wasn't cause she preferred another guy.

Sorry...

I know How intense a guy loves when he wants to especially his first love and How our ladies play with it and start chasing love when they are old.

You have got to forgive her for hurting you, forgive yourself for falling for her and decide to start again.

I like the fact that you want to heal and have a total rehaul before venturing into the dating field again.

Praying to God to heal you helps a lot; He is very very ready to heal you. That is step 1.

I believe there is someone out there destined to be a perfect fit for you... however note that even though she is a perfect fit, she is not perfect just as you are not perfect too.

But first, you need the healing/overhaul so you can love selflessly again.

bukatyne:
Sorry...

I know How intense a guy loves when he wants to especially his first love and How our ladies play with it and start chasing love when they are old.

You have got to forgive her for hurting you, forgive yourself for falling for her and decide to start again.

I like the fact that you want to heal and have a total rehaul before venturing into the dating field again.

Praying to God to heal you helps a lot; He is very very ready to heal you. That is step 1.

I believe there is someone out there destined to be a perfect fit for you... however note that even though she is a perfect fit, she is not perfect just as you are not perfect too.

But first, you need the healing/overhaul so you can love selflessly again.

Thank you so much. I harbour no hate whatsoever. I need the healing/overhaul process to be done with before I try again. For now, I just keep the good ones as friends and discard those I don't like.

I believe when am ready again, God will do a perfect job. I don't expect her to be perfect cause that would be harsh of me.
I hardly go private on social media but because of you, I decided to and it was worth it. Thanks for being a blessing.

okotv:
Thank you so much. I harbour no hate whatsoever. I need the healing/overhaul process to be done with before I try again. For now, I just keep the good ones as friends and discard those I don't like.

I believe when am ready again, God will do a perfect job. I don't expect her to be perfect cause that would be harsh of me.
I hardly go private on social media but because of you, I decided to and it was worth it. Thanks for being a blessing.

See me smiling here

Glad to be a blessing to you.

Oh dear! Blessings...

The other commentators are right. There's no telling where you'll meet.

One hot sticky day, I filled in for someone on blood drive duty. I really didn't want to, and I was going through a really bad period in my life at the time, but it sort of just fell into my lap since the responsible person had decided to come up with some BS excuse not to be there (I was so sure this I was the case). In annoyance, I mechanically went through donor after donor after donor until my time there was through. "Hello there". Sanitize. "This might hurt a little". Stick. Draw. Blot. Band-aid. "Thank you". "Bye".

Finally, it was all over, and I went home.

Months later (two, in fact) , I noticed someone staring at me. Nah, I didn't notice a thing, but you know that feeling you get as if you can literally feel eyeballs on you? Yh, I felt that. So naturally, I started to look all around to see what was up. Nothing. Okay, false alarm? Yet the feeling was still there. The very next day, as I'm walking through a hall around that same location, I notice someone looking at me. This time there was something, or rather someone to notice. So right then, some guy approaches me, takes a longg look at me, and says,"It was you."

Me: "I'm sorry. Can I help you"

He: "You 'stabbed' me, and you didn't even ask me how my day was."

MeThinks:Um, yh. I'm pretty sure I would remember stabbing...you

MeSays: "I'm afraid I don't follow.."

He further explains he came in on day blah and mentions a blood drive, and it all clicks into place (the scenario, and not the stranger). I start to apologize profusely - now understanding what he meant by "stabbing" - and I actually start to write him a contact number to lodge a complaint, because I felt bad and thought it was what he asking for (what else?!), and also because I was having a bad day that day too. But he stops me.

He: "No. I just wanted you to ask me...how my day was."

MeThinks: Are you out of your mind??

MeSays: *blank tired stare* " Are you ou-...H-how was your. Day?"

It dawned on me. I once again tell him 'sorry sorry & a polite goodbye', and start to gravitate away from him towards getting my nearby routine chai on my way home, but he was still there and still talking...

For a few days after that, and every once in from then on, he would stop by my 'wind-down-and-chill' routine chai spot - sometimes seemingly rushed - just I was getting there so I could supposedly ask him "how his day was going". I could obviously tell he was interested, and he was attractive. He didn't ask for my number (and I liked that), but I felt I needed to be clear bc I really couldn't handle a rel at that time. At first, I would tell him that I wasn't interested in dating anyone, and that I was going through a tough time, but he always brushed it off and changed the subject. He was interesting. Witty. A bit perplexed, and since I didn't particularly remember him, I looked into it to make sure he had come in for the BD like he claimed, and he had.

Well, that's basically how we got to know each other lol. We started dating a little over a year after that, and I largely credit him with helping me through a dark time in my life. I couldn't ask for better. We're engaged.

That's it (finally). So I guess my advice is probably something like "stab him, and don't ask him how his day went" (That was a damn lie btw. Stab? Please. Regardless, I 'stab' no more )

Dheartless:
well then why do they start forming when a brother start showing those warm feelings?
for example I really don't like my present girl but she was just too nice when we first met so I gave it a try and she was worth loving but after sometime she just start making it seem like I should be the only one to make the relationship work.

I told her to go her way two days ago.

am starting to feel like maybe cause I was never really
attracted to most of them in the first place that's why.

I don't know is a guy the only one to meant to put into a relationship?

or maybe I need to find a lady that catches my attention from the very beginning.

cause am starting to believe love don't grow with time.

( note am really a happy face and friendly guy, I just don't let me get ride over)

No, a guy should not be the only one who tries to make it work.

And you need to feel some attraction before you enter a relationship. Don't just get yourself into one because she is nice. That's not enough.

EfemenaXY:
Lol!

And that's why kids shouldn't be getting married in the first place!



Abeg help me out here. I don't get it. What's the clue? Why were his eyes so red? I would have thought maybe it's the wee-wee he smoked, but you say it's incense? So is the guy a feverent prayer warrior or what?



Yes o!

Pursue them very well. Can you imagine them two filling a whole page with that...that.. language!

Until I got banned.

goofyone:
Carefreewannabe must have quite a reputation here.

Not necessarily a good one

I hate seeing this kind of thread late

EnlightenedSoul:
The other commentators are right. There's no telling where you'll meet.

One hot sticky day, I filled in for someone on blood drive duty. I really didn't want to, and I was going through a really bad period in my life at the time, but it sort of just fell into my lap since the responsible person had decided to come up with some BS excuse not to be there (I was so sure this I was the case). In annoyance, I mechanically went through donor after donor after donor until my time there was through. "Hello there". Sanitize. "This might hurt a little". Stick. Draw. Blot. Band-aid. "Thank you". "Bye".

Finally, it was all over, and I went home.

Months later (two, in fact) , I noticed someone staring at me. Nah, I didn't notice a thing, but you know that feeling you get as if you can literally feel eyeballs on you? Yh, I felt that. So naturally, I started to look all around to see what was up. Nothing. Okay, false alarm? Yet the feeling was still there. The very next day, as I'm walking through a hall around that same location, I notice someone looking at me. This time there was something, or rather someone to notice. So right then, some guy approaches me, takes a longg look at me, and says,"It was you."

Me: "I'm sorry. Can I help you"

He: "You 'stabbed' me, and you didn't even ask me how my day was."

MeThinks:Um, yh. I'm pretty sure I would remember stabbing...you

MeSays: "I'm afraid I don't follow.."

He further explains he came in on day blah and mentions a blood drive, and it all clicks into place (the scenario, and not the stranger). I start to apologize profusely - now understanding what he meant by "stabbing" - and I actually start to write him a contact number to lodge a complaint, because I felt bad and thought it was what he asking for (what else?!), and also because I was having a bad day that day too. But he stops me.

He: "No. I just wanted you to ask me...how my day was."

MeThinks: Are you out of your mind??

MeSays: *blank tired stare* " Are you ou-...H-how was your. Day?"

It dawned on me. I once again tell him 'sorry sorry & a polite goodbye', and start to gravitate away from him towards getting my nearby routine chai on my way home, but he was still there and still talking...

For a few days after that, and every once in from then on, he would stop by my 'wind-down-and-chill' routine chai spot - sometimes seemingly rushed - just I was getting there so I could supposedly ask him "how his day was going". I could obviously tell he was interested, and he was attractive. He didn't ask for my number (and I liked that), but I felt I needed to be clear bc I really couldn't handle a rel at that time. At first, I would tell him that I wasn't interested in dating anyone, and that I was going through a tough time, but he always brushed it off and changed the subject. He was interesting. Witty. A bit perplexed, and since I didn't particularly remember him, I looked into it to make sure he had come in for the BD like he claimed, and he had.

Well, that's basically how we got to know each other lol. We started dating a little over a year after that, and I largely credit him with helping me through a dark time in my life. I couldn't ask for better. We're engaged.

That's it (finally). So I guess my advice is probably something like "stab him, and don't ask him how his day went" (That was a damn lie btw. Stab? Please. Regardless, I 'stab' no more )

Yay! @ engaged, wedding bells soon eh? Hmm he'll be the one doing the stabbing

edwife:
Well, to tell you the truth i was immediately attracted by his looks-the way he was staring at me,his smile warmed me up(there were just this chemistry between us) That night,he called me and we talked for 3 hours non-stop.....the next morning he called me to say good morning beautiful angel,how was your night?

It was very fast.....

gosh. I came late

cococandy:
gosh. I came late

ahahaha you know i had this feeling you did not see it

edwife:
ahahaha you know i had this feeling you did not see it

I didn't

Anyway great stories so far.

carefreewannabe:
Not necessarily a good one

I want to know what kind

Under the mango tree

cococandy:
I didn't

Anyway great stories so far.

Thank you nwannem

EnlightenedSoul:
.

Cool story!

Dheartless:
I lost the ability to approach a lady for reasons that concern relationship
I don't want to push a girl before she falls in love ( that was how I got here)

I get lots of "green light" attention ( like admiring looks, comments , sometimes some girls ask personal questions, they want to be around), but once I make a move (she might be a friend or a colleague or someone that often cross my part eg a Church member) , I just drop the chase the next moment probably because I cant stand a girls shakara (wanting me to keep chasing for love).
now it has become chronic that even after a warm chat with a lady and she says " i don't give out my number easily, why don't you meet me at this address tomorrow so we can get to know each other well before I can trust you with information about me"
I will simply go and never again bother about her ( in some cases some actually tried to locate me to be sure what went wrong)

I get along with girls a lot though ( they say you are very funny)
so i have been in many relationship with ladies who I would say were in love with me, without me doing almost nothing to be in the relationship but just by being a friend or the normal cool guy she sees around ( may be work place,church , friend of a friend)
before I know things just fall in place ( there are some cases when someone close to me had to pass the message from the girl to me indirectly like " ada says she really love your company and she thinks you are cute"

the problem is that most of the ones I really felt something for always slip away , probably because I said nothing that suggested I wish to get more committed
( one deleted my contact, when I asked why, she said she was expecting a relationship proposal from me but It never came, instead it came from my friend and she accepted thinking I would get angry but I didn't so she had to let me go)

this days I don't even say hi to someone I don't know but I find attractive unless am in a very happy mood

am i suffering from what I detest the most (pride) ?

I don't want to push someone before she falls in love with me ( that was what got me to this stage)

at a point in time i was wondering if i was cloned,a good percentage of ur comment seem so muck like me

EnlightenedSoul:
The other commentators are right. There's no telling where you'll meet.

One hot sticky day, I filled in for someone on blood drive duty. I really didn't want to, and I was going through a really bad period in my life at the time, but it sort of just fell into my lap since the responsible person had decided to come up with some BS excuse not to be there (I was so sure this I was the case). In annoyance, I mechanically went through donor after donor after donor until my time there was through. "Hello there". Sanitize. "This might hurt a little". Stick. Draw. Blot. Band-aid. "Thank you". "Bye".

Finally, it was all over, and I went home.

Months later (two, in fact) , I noticed someone staring at me. Nah, I didn't notice a thing, but you know that feeling you get as if you can literally feel eyeballs on you? Yh, I felt that. So naturally, I started to look all around to see what was up. Nothing. Okay, false alarm? Yet the feeling was still there. The very next day, as I'm walking through a hall around that same location, I notice someone looking at me. This time there was something, or rather someone to notice. So right then, some guy approaches me, takes a longg look at me, and says,"It was you."

Me: "I'm sorry. Can I help you"

He: "You 'stabbed' me, and you didn't even ask me how my day was."

MeThinks:Um, yh. I'm pretty sure I would remember stabbing...you

MeSays: "I'm afraid I don't follow.."

He further explains he came in on day blah and mentions a blood drive, and it all clicks into place (the scenario, and not the stranger). I start to apologize profusely - now understanding what he meant by "stabbing" - and I actually start to write him a contact number to lodge a complaint, because I felt bad and thought it was what he asking for (what else?!), and also because I was having a bad day that day too. But he stops me.

He: "No. I just wanted you to ask me...how my day was."

MeThinks: Are you out of your mind??

MeSays: *blank tired stare* " Are you ou-...H-how was your. Day?"

It dawned on me. I once again tell him 'sorry sorry & a polite goodbye', and start to gravitate away from him towards getting my nearby routine chai on my way home, but he was still there and still talking...

For a few days after that, and every once in from then on, he would stop by my 'wind-down-and-chill' routine chai spot - sometimes seemingly rushed - just I was getting there so I could supposedly ask him "how his day was going". I could obviously tell he was interested, and he was attractive. He didn't ask for my number (and I liked that), but I felt I needed to be clear bc I really couldn't handle a rel at that time. At first, I would tell him that I wasn't interested in dating anyone, and that I was going through a tough time, but he always brushed it off and changed the subject. He was interesting. Witty. A bit perplexed, and since I didn't particularly remember him, I looked into it to make sure he had come in for the BD like he claimed, and he had.

Well, that's basically how we got to know each other lol. We started dating a little over a year after that, and I largely credit him with helping me through a dark time in my life. I couldn't ask for better. We're engaged.

That's it (finally). So I guess my advice is probably something like "stab him, and don't ask him how his day went" (That was a damn lie btw. Stab? Please. Regardless, I 'stab' no more )

Lovely story. Love is beautiful.

jaybee3:
Under the mango tree

I'm really interested Jay

goofyone:
I want to know what kind

I guess good and bad even though I am trying to behave myself and it's not easy.

Chillisauce:
Sorry carefree, I thought we were in the kitchen thread.

Never mind!

MrHardOn:
Most of the ladies I meet don't measure up. Have given up now. Very hard to find a freak spouse...with open.mind.

What do you mean by "freak spouse"?

okotv:
its becoming too much ......(just me thinking aloud)...

I don't fancy ladies. They kinda bore me. A past life experience though. Am getting over it but then...

Let me illustrate...if I see a lady anywhere, no matter how beautiful or caring I look out for faults. Cause of my analytical mind, I find faults easily and then the feelings poof......hope you get sha ??

Flaws can make people interesting. Perfection is boring and doesn't exist in this world.

okotv:
Mizmycoli's write-up on love has made me decide
to share why I locked up my heart to love for so
long. It all began in 2007, I spent the holidays at an
aunt's place and on that fateful day, I was caught by
the younger brother of a girl also staying in the flat
doing immoral things(mind you nothing like
Penetration, just body touching)as my hormones
had just started to develop. We were reported and
blamed, punished but the annoying thing about that
phase of my life as a young boy was how the whole
situation was heaped on me. I decided to start
snubbing females and that was helped by the fact
that I was attending a boys only boarding school.
When I graduated, I had been so locked up I didn't
even notice, I was cold to girls and treated them as
guys.
It all changed when I met a true female intellectual.
She took the better part of two months convincing
me to give love a chance. I finally succumbed but
met a terrible heartbreak. So severe was it that it
took two weeks for me to get over it. I will love one
day but for now, I have decided to forgo that
passion till am through with my academics and
trainings.

That is a more detailed explanation .

ONLY TWO WEEKS? Come on, this isn't long.

carefreewannabe:
I guess good and bad even though I am trying to behave myself and it's not easy.

Haha. You've got your work cut out for you. I wanna believe mostly good anyways. You feisty sometimes?

goofyone:
Haha. You've got your work cut out for you. I wanna believe mostly good anyways. You feisty sometimes?

Sometimes?

Most of the time.
My mum used to tell me that it would often get me into trouble.

Are you feisty? Which three adjectives would you choose to describe your personality?

I think, I should open a thread, in which I will ask NLanders to describe their personalities.