₦airaland Forum

Scientific evidence supports the idea that each
partner is responsible for the health of his or her
relationship. To do your part, consider these simple,
empirically-based changes as a guide toward a
happier and healthier partnership:

1. Get more sleep
. Taking care of yourself is a
win-win for you and your relationship, and
sleep is at the top of the list. Not only can
sleep deprivation affect your energy, mental
alertness, and mood, but it reduces glucose
levels, which adversely affects self-control
(Gailliot & Baumeister, 2007). And self-control
plays a big role in relationship success: Those
with higher self-control are more able to
respond in constructive ways to their partners
(Finkel & Campbell, 2001), and the more self-
control couples have, the higher their
relationship quality tends to be (Vohs,
Finkenauer, & Baumeister, 2011).

2. Take action
. Certain behaviors make a
difference in relationship happiness. These
maintenance behaviors often come naturally,
but intentional efforts to engage in them could
benefit relationships. Research (Stafford, 2010)
underscores the power of these seven
behaviors in particular in predicting relationship
satisfaction, liking, love, and commitment:
1. Positivity. Express happiness and
pleasure when spending time together.
2. Understanding. Listen, forgive,
apologize, and refrain from judgment.
3. Giving assurance. Talk about the future;
remind your partner what he/she means
to you.
4. Self-disclosing . Share feelings and
encourage your partner to do the same.
5. Openness . Share what you need or want
in the relationship.
6. Sharing tasks. Equitably share
responsibilities (e.g., family, household,
relationship).
7. Involve networks. Spend time with your
partner’s friends and family.

3. Express your gratitude.
Feeling grateful is one
thing, but telling your partner is another. Do
you express your gratitude? It turns out that
sharing your feelings of gratitude is linked to
positive partner perceptions and a willingness
to voice relationship concerns (Lambert &
Fincham, 2011), which helps maintain healthy
relationships.

4. Avoid hunger.
New plans for physical health
and wellness often involve diet changes (eat
more veggies, etc.), but do what you can to
avoid hunger. New evidence suggests that
restrictive dieting can have a negative effect on
relationship quality. When you’re hungry, anger
and aggression are more likely (Bushman,
DeWall, Pond, & Hanus, 2014); in relationships,
these “hangry” moments do little to promote
relationship well-being.

5. Focus on humility
. Help your relationship by
keeping a check on your ego. Not only are
humble people evaluated more positively as
potential relationship partners, but humility
seems to be an important ingredient for
relationship success (Van Tongeren, Davis, &
Hook, 2004). It may improve relationships
through its association with forgiveness, a
powerful tool for healthy relationships.

6. Spend quality time together
. Much anecdotal
evidence suggests that spending more time
together increases relationship satisfaction, but
only recently has research scrutinized whether
time really does increase satisfaction, or
whether perhaps relationship satisfaction
increases time spent together. Contrary to
widespread belief, long-distance relationships
are no different in their relationship quality
(Gulner & Swensen, 1995), despite the idea
that (by definition) couples in long-distance
relationships spend less time together. The
results suggest we might attend more to the
quality of the time spent with our partner,
rather than the quantity.

7. Be kind to yourself.
To be the best partner you
can be, start by being kind to yourself.
Scientific evidence is accumulating in support
of the idea that self-compassion is a wonderful
foundation for a healthy partnership. Self-
compassion is a habit of gentleness towards
oneself during times of failure, inadequacy, and
imperfection. Evidence shows that self-
compassion predicts the types of behaviors
that translate into healthier relationships, such
as offering care and concern for a partner (Neff
& Beretvas, 2013). In other words, working on
ourselves can benefit our relationships.
Hopefully this empirically-based evidence can help
benefit your relationship. Note that healthy
relationships reflect an ongoing effort from both
partners to address the needs of “me,” “you,” and
“us,” and are difficult to achieve unilaterally. That
said, an everyday effort by one partner changes the
relationship for the other partner, potentially
influencing the other’s thoughts and behaviors. In
other words, your actions do not occur in isolation;
they have an influence on both your partner and your
shared relationship

another list
*yawns*

Enegod:
another list
*yawns*

HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHA

THAT IS EXCATLY MY FIRST REACTION WHEN I READ THE POST....

YOU BEAT ME TO IT......GREAT MINDS EH?

#pitycomment

I totally concur wit d " avoid hunger!" aspect..A hungry man is an angry man...

*yawns....

More like '7 simple ways' to fall asleep

Xiadnat:
HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHA

THAT IS EXCATLY MY FIRST REACTION WHEN I READ THE POST....

YOU BEAT ME TO IT......GREAT MINDS EH?

#pitycomment

lol...just tired of it!

Enegod:
lol...just tired of it!

I hear you !!