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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Religion / Traditional Wedding Or White Wedding? (13871 Views)
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Re: Traditional Wedding Or White Wedding? by vivypretty(f): 6:38am On Jun 26, 2015 |
abigdwn:even before the white came there was always someone that serves as the custodian of there religion to help and direct them on how to perform the marital rites |
Re: Traditional Wedding Or White Wedding? by vivypretty(f): 6:41am On Jun 26, 2015 |
Mellin:do ur research and who gave you that opinion that you are a match for me |
Re: Traditional Wedding Or White Wedding? by ProfessorPeter(m): 8:17am On Jun 26, 2015 |
Processor01:how do explain our fathers who married our mothers without pastor's blessings and their marriages were blessed 2 Likes |
Re: Traditional Wedding Or White Wedding? by Alwaystrue(f): 11:28am On Jun 26, 2015 |
ProfessorPeter: I believe wedding is complete after the woman has been GIVEN AWAY to the man as his wife. Scriptures are rife with this. In scriptures, Jacob had paid the dowry of Rachel (through labour) yet he still had to request from her father that he had fulfilled the requirements to have her to which Laban called a feast (optional) before handing Leah (cunningly) over to him. At Rachel's time, Laban still gave her away as scripture says. There is a thing about fulfilling all righteousness atimes that allows for peace. I wonder what would have happened had it been that Jacob just took Rachel and slept with her without this formal handover. Jesus also attended a wedding feast. I think there is something about a number of people being involved in the 'Giving Away' process (either held at chirch, court or family gathering) but I do not see it as mandatory as long as the woman is being given away by her family anyway. 1 Like |
Re: Traditional Wedding Or White Wedding? by matt7: 4:24pm On Jun 26, 2015 |
This is a very interesting topic, sensitive and vital, especially for young believers who are ignorant of what the bible says. It is not a pastor who joins a couple. Bible says , "What God has joined together, let no man put asunder" Mark 9:10. I paid my wife bride price in January. Food and drinks were provided for the guest. The late father, represented by the brother handed my woman to me as wife. The village king and members of the kindred were there including my wife's mother and my family. We finished everything and I took my wife to my village Afikpo in Ebonyi State. Jejely and nwayoly we entered Lagos and some people be like "When you go do the white wedding?" and I am like " Wait you go soon get IV for the rainbow wedding , na only white you like?" As if I had just gone to play tumbo tumbo in the village.... Shioor When we knelt before the parent of my wife and prayer was made for us, who was the prayer directed to? Is it another God somewhere? Isnt it thesame God the pastor will call on. Or is the God different? Where is it written in the bible that a pastor must join couples. Mind you, the joining of a couple is spiritual, it is not what the pastor does on the pulpit. It is God who joins, I cannot repeat this enough. Did Jesus, Peter, Paul or any of the apostles join anybody? I wonder where we got this junk from. We have made the word of God of no effect because of men's tradition, that has gradually made it way into the church. The Muslim who don't do church wedding has less number of divorce compared to we Christian who do the so called " Christian or White wedding". FYI I am a believer by God's grace. I have my wife living with me as I speak. I feel no sense of guilt. The bible is clear on this. Lets not put yoke and unecessary burden upon people. See the rate of promiscuity around us. Just because young men are afraid of the cost of getting married. If a pastor feels its necessary to bless the couple. Simply call them out after Sunday service and do that and lets stop making a mountain out of a mole hill. If you can pay the bride price and have the parent of your wife release her to you, my friend you are married. Forget the ceremony, if you have the cash, do it. If not, my brother start planning your family. A 3 bedroom flat is around 700k now in Lagos, car is close to a million depending on your choice. School fees, pampers, NEPA bill, Lawma, Feeding etc are pending. Dont impress publicly and suffer privately. I have said my own.... *Grabs a bottle of groundnut and tosses it gradually into the mouth* 2 Likes |
Re: Traditional Wedding Or White Wedding? by ProfessorPeter(m): 5:26pm On Jun 26, 2015 |
matt7:God bless my brother exactly my thought. Many young men are out there ripe for marriage but because of high cost of white wedding. They decided to live in secret sin. 2 Likes |
Re: Traditional Wedding Or White Wedding? by Alwaystrue(f): 6:56pm On Jun 26, 2015 |
Don't get it twisted though. If the parents of the bride require a 'white' wedding as part of the final seal of the wedding, do oblige especially If both are Christians. I helped decide a wedding plan where there was issue of choice of the church. Parent and bride wanted different churches. It ended well, court and traditional cum reception with pastoral blessing was agreed. I think clergy of both churches were present to bless them. Funnily, this same approach was adopted by another attendee . Cost saved, goal achieved. In all i Iove church weddings and that is why some churches ensure the parents of the couple are in support and hold it after the trad not before. That is the key. |
Re: Traditional Wedding Or White Wedding? by Nikkitee(f): 7:53pm On Jun 26, 2015 |
[quote author=vivypretty post=]traditional marriage is the real marriage.church wedding is just ceremonial.ones parents consent is d most important in any marriage. |
Re: Traditional Wedding Or White Wedding? by anukulapo: 8:03pm On Jun 26, 2015 |
ProfessorPeter: Same way "white wedding" was copied (no big deal with the copying other than making it a standard and a tool for discrimination and blackmail by some) so was payment of "dowry" copied. This practice has long found it's way into the society that it's hard to divorce it. However,marriage is established between two people mainly (regardless of white wedding or dowry being paid) when some steps are taken, which are God's principle of "two becoming one". Honoring ones parent and societal practices (which in itself not a sin) is ideal in the sight of God hence they are also be permitted in the sight of God BUT they are not spelt out as a requirement by God in the scripture. NOT even dowry was commanded. |
Re: Traditional Wedding Or White Wedding? by vivypretty(f): 8:15pm On Jun 26, 2015 |
[quote author=Nikkitee post=35186521][/quote] who started the institution of marriage if not God through his creation of a woman as man's companion so to me after seeking the consent of parents God's blessing is next |
Re: Traditional Wedding Or White Wedding? by ayoku777(m): 8:16pm On Jun 26, 2015 |
I don't know why people are trying to equate white wedding to mean christian wedding. By my own count, just 10 people can hold a christian wedding that is valid in the eyes of God. The groom and the bride. The father and mother of the bride and groom, or people representing them with their full consent. Three witnesses, who are professing believers in Christ, to stand as the church (where two or three and gathered in my name, there I am). And a minister of God, to bless the union in the name of Jesus, and pronounce you as man and wife, before God and the saints. There you have it; just ten people and you can have a bonafide and valid christian wedding. It doesn't matter if the bride is dressed in white or green, or if the groom is wearing suit or Tshirt. It doesn't matter if there is food and refreshments. Or people choose to fast that day. It doesn't matter if it was held in church, or in court or at home or under a tree. It will still be a valid christian wedding before God and the saints. Those who say they didn't do a christian wedding because of cost actually don't know what makes a wedding a christian wedding. They are confusing white wedding with christian wedding. By my count and standard of what makes a wedding a christian wedding; christian wedding can be the cheapest and most-stress free weddings. Just the bride and groom, parents of the two, three christian witnesses and a minister. 2 Likes |
Re: Traditional Wedding Or White Wedding? by anukulapo: 10:42pm On Jun 26, 2015 |
Processor01:Infact bro,betrothal is on the same level as introduction (formal declaration of interest in marriage witnessed by families. Engagement literary means connected. When people are connected, why do they need "white" connection again? It is because we adopted the "white" wedding that our faith and practice was relegated and reduced to semi-authentic. "The union is dedicated to God by the couple themselves" - this statement is the over-all truth. |
Re: Traditional Wedding Or White Wedding? by anukulapo: 10:44pm On Jun 26, 2015 |
ProfessorPeter:The question is not even about it being sin in the first place. It's about what makes two become one and at what point the joining occurs. Many references in the scripture. |
Re: Traditional Wedding Or White Wedding? by jcross19: 5:29pm On Jun 28, 2015 |
ayoku777:first: came together there mean sexual intercourse that's the meaning. Secondly sir: what's the different between white wedding and christian wedding because when I was in primary school I was taught to believe that we have four type of weddings in nigeria which are traditional,court,islamic and christian wedding so which one is white wedding sir? |
Re: Traditional Wedding Or White Wedding? by jcross19: 5:32pm On Jun 28, 2015 |
vivypretty:I have never see any where in new testament that talks about church wedding of wearing of suit and gown. |
Re: Traditional Wedding Or White Wedding? by vivypretty(f): 9:06pm On Jun 28, 2015 |
jcross19:pls check my bible verse |
Re: Traditional Wedding Or White Wedding? by jcross19: 4:49am On Jun 29, 2015 |
vivypretty:there I did not see wearing suite and white gown. |
Re: Traditional Wedding Or White Wedding? by jcross19: 4:52am On Jun 29, 2015 |
vivypretty:sister "the husband as the head of a wife" that's what I saw o does it relate what I asked? There is nothing like church wedding in the bible the one we are doing now in church as custom. |
Re: Traditional Wedding Or White Wedding? by jcross19: 4:57am On Jun 29, 2015 |
She become your wife when you pay her bride price . What we suppose to do in church is introduce them to members as husband and wife , pray for them than wearing suit and white gown what for? Is that not english custom taught us by missionaries that brought the religion? Is biblical? But now that have formed part of church which can't be removed like tithe. 1 Like |
Re: Traditional Wedding Or White Wedding? by vivypretty(f): 5:20am On Jun 29, 2015 |
jcross19:revelation? |
Re: Traditional Wedding Or White Wedding? by vivypretty(f): 5:28am On Jun 29, 2015 |
jcross19:revelation talks about a bride in white linen.accept it or not is the truth. ephesians compares Husband as the head of the wife with christ as the head of the church |
Re: Traditional Wedding Or White Wedding? by jcross19: 5:42am On Jun 29, 2015 |
vivypretty:is that what your pastor taught you ma? In that chapter am seeing a successful servants that made it to the end, I think that's parable, then are you going to marry an animal? That's just a parable ma. All I want is show me in the bible where bible say we should marry in suit and gown bound with ring if not that marriage is not legalise before God then are you telling me that those who did only court wedding are fornicating now?. |
Re: Traditional Wedding Or White Wedding? by vivypretty(f): 5:43am On Jun 29, 2015 |
[quote author=Nikkitee post=35186521][/quote] after that comes the consent of God which he gives when u present urself to the priest (an anointed man) the trend now is to do an extravagant wedding but it doesn't have to be so in my church even in 5:30 am mass the priest can wed you |
Re: Traditional Wedding Or White Wedding? by vivypretty(f): 6:32am On Jun 29, 2015 |
[quote author=jcross19 post=35269051]is that what your pastor taught you ma? In that chapter am seeing a successful servants that made it to the end, I think that's parable, then are you going to marry an animal? That's just a parable ma. All I want is show me in the bible where bible say we should marry in suit and gown bound with ring if not that marriage is not legalise before God then are you telling me that those who did only court wedding are fornicating now?.[/quote is that the interpretation you gave to the verse. who introduced this court marriage you are talking about? it is no where near the bible but God is the author of marriage is only right to seek his consent |
Re: Traditional Wedding Or White Wedding? by ProfessorPeter(m): 8:16am On Jun 29, 2015 |
The reason i raised this issue is to correct the impression that until you do "white wedding" sleeping with your partner is sin. I ve seen how 1. Church stopped " white wedding" because the lady was pregnant before the wedding date. 2. The church suspended the couple because the woman put to bed less than nine month after their wedding. It makes d couple look like a sinners in the eye of God and the people also see then as sinner. CHURCH WEDDING IS NOT SCRIPTURAL. DOWRY VALIDATE BEFORE GOD N MAN, THE REST IS UNNECESSARY 1 Like |
Re: Traditional Wedding Or White Wedding? by jcross19: 10:36am On Jun 29, 2015 |
[quote author=vivypretty post=35269715][/quote] by wearing suit and white gown? |
Re: Traditional Wedding Or White Wedding? by anukulapo: 10:56am On Jun 29, 2015 |
ProfessorPeter:Ok,now its clear to me. All na religious bondage. Doctrine of men is not the standard of God...BUT you are also yet to show me where the bible says that DOWRY validates marriage before God and man. |
Re: Traditional Wedding Or White Wedding? by vivypretty(f): 12:01pm On Jun 29, 2015 |
jcross19:not all guyz were white suit or suit at all.some a white shirt.revelation 18:7-8(christ clothes his bride (the church) in his own righteousness as a garment of "fine linen,clean n white" |
Re: Traditional Wedding Or White Wedding? by back2sender: 2:49pm On Jun 29, 2015 |
matt7:God bless you real good for this write up. You said it the way it is. |
Re: Traditional Wedding Or White Wedding? by jcross19: 2:53pm On Jun 29, 2015 |
vivypretty:sir that things in revelation won't happen like that because they are just a parables ma . Okay . What we suppose is to introduce the couple to church and pray for them that's all. Church don't have her special wedding biblical , okay. But now those things were introduced by roman catholic . |
Re: Traditional Wedding Or White Wedding? by vivypretty(f): 4:58pm On Jun 29, 2015 |
jcross19:you are right when you said "introduce the couple to church and pray for them " but talking about white you know your pocket and what you can afford |
Re: Traditional Wedding Or White Wedding? by jcross19: 5:12pm On Jun 29, 2015 |
vivypretty:the issue of white wedding has become the custom of the church, am not opposing it but we should encourage the couple to be introduce in church and receive church blessing as well to reduce the rate of fornications in church . I won't marry until I buy suit and white gown , cook 3 bags of rice with cow and set cars entourage. That's madness. |
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